Never apologize, Never explain

My car is experiencing mitosis

I hope Brendan Fraser is having a nice day.

I hope one day that Brendan Fraser gets to see this post with several thousand (one day perhaps several hundred thousand?) people who have all banded together, united for one single common purpose: to hope that he is having a nice day.

[x] He deserves our love and respect

twitter users be like ‘haha tumblr? where all the snowflake babies uwu smol sensitive babby beans are?’ and then make a 14 tweet thread about how an animal crossing villager is gaslighting them or whatever

the sexual tension between two gas stations on the same intersection

I’m so sick of this shit. Two gastations can’t even be on the same block without some walnut shipping them, while I can’t find a single fic for dennys/applebees with dennys bottoming.

you’re literally out of your mind if you think Dennys isnt a top

I wish the 2012 apocalypse actually happened

how many toes you got?

you mean in my mouth or

blocked, have a horrible day

me: *turns up to court in a fursuit* “hi I’m your public defurnder :3c”

me: *tears in my eyes begging the judge* ill plead guilty if you arrest them too

never seen an episode of riverdale in my life but im sitting here in complete agony over the phrase “sold jingle jangle to the ghoulies” i literally have no idea what this show could possibly be about at this point

any Catholics online ? I got some questions.

Yeah I'm catholic whatsup

how do i reach heaven through violence

Its called a crusade and you need to get the Pope's permission first

If there are trees you aren’t alone

I can’t tell if this is supposed to be encouragement or an ominous warning

#that’s entirely up to the trees

not to be ladphobic but I think ppl who go for a bit of cheeky nandos in public are disgusting :/ It’s adam and eve not banter with steve

what language is this

*slowly inches closer to your pet*