Seong Gi-hun, demon hunter; between two worlds i found your name

He married a stubborn, independent woman who did what she believed in, regardless of anyone else's advice. Then his wife died and he went to Il-nam - another strong, independent person who seemed to believe in him/see something of value in him and offered him guidance that made him feel good about himself - let himself be molded into Il-nam's Front Man, and took Il-nam's philosophy as his own. Then as soon as Il-nam was dying, who should show back up in his life but Jun-ho, the younger brother who looked up to him as a hero and could be a perfect guiding force through Il-nam dying and In-ho fully taking on Il-nam's role at the head of the games.

... except, of course, Jun-ho doesn't take his hand, so In-ho shoots him off a cliff and immediately has about 19 thousand deep personal crises over it

... and then gets obsessed with the winner of that year's games, who caught Il-nam's eye for reasons In-ho cannot figure out, who no one expected to get very far in the games and yet wound up the winner, who was stubborn and clever and kind and believed in impossible things, who refused to kill his best friend only to watch said best friend die in front of him anyway because he couldn't stop someone he loved from making a choice that killed them.

And what I'm saying here is: In-ho desperately wants a big, strong somebody to love him and guide him and tell him who to be so that he'll be valuable and worthy of their admiration.