purple they

alright I'm almost finished Project Hail Mary, and I have to say, I don't get why people are shipping the guy with Markiplier when he's already in a perfectly healthy queer-platonic relationship with the alien spider made of rocks

I told my little nephew that I'd wave at his airplane when it flew over my house today, and he very calmly and politely explained that it wouldn't be possible to see me due to the limitations of human vision. I said he just had to squint real hard, and he took a deep breath and went into the toddler version of "see, what you're not understanding–"

i see that i've carefully put that important document away in a completely unknown location

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

Jasmine Vine, lead programmer of Hollow Knight & Silksong just transitioned!! I'm so happy for her!❤️🏳️‍⚧️

in less than three years we will have adults born in the 2000’s 

the funny thing about this is that both people born in the 2000s are reblogging this freaking out because they arent ready to be adults and people who were born before the 2000s are freaking out about how they feel old and that it cant be happening because all people born in the 2000s are like 4

in less than two years we will have adults born in the 2010’s 

we gotta do something about ridiculously bright headlights man

[ID: A lunchbox containing a handful of loose lettuce and a half-empty bottle of Pepsi.]

that's arugula

[ID: A lunchbox containing a handful of loose lettuce and a half-empty bottle of arugula]

If you went to a bar and the bartender was a mousegirl you could ask for a drink and she would balance it on her head and say "for you, it's on the mouse"

the crazy thing about this is that it took one single word to turn it horny. coulda been a normal cute post. coulda taken the high road & conjured a delightful image of a mouse scampering down the bar with a beer ten times its size balanced on its head. but you had to say "mousegirl" and not "mouse." don't pretend this isn't what's going on either i know the score i know what's up. i'm familiar with this sort of semantic trick. you want to fuck down on an anime girl with certain characteristics of a rodent and everyone's gotta know.

gettin real tired of people pretending that the writers not explaining every little thing in detail is the same thing as a plothole tbh

has to think once while watching something whoa this is bad writing

The Cinema Sins effect

Cinema Sins would never had existed if we were all lizards.

THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT