I'm Not The Messenger At All

are you “i look worse with my glasses on” team or “i look worse without my glasses on” team?

I look fucking ugly all the time

i know i made this post but Mood

BOBSON DUGNUTT

Rangers lineup looks good this year

slug: hmmm… plant: *chawmp* slug: ah I see. no thank you.

when it’s bedtime and i call my pet skull up onto the california king

Anybody else got like,, rlly random connections to famous ppl?? Like my older brothers were friends w Jennifer Lawrence when they were like 12 and I just found out I’m friends w the cousin of the girl who voiced honey lemon in big hero six like, idk what I’m supposed to do with either of these tid bits I feel like I was supposed to live my life in ignorance of them

we opened at 11 this morning. i watched an old man literally pry the fucking sliding doors open at 10:43 and stand there just staring into the empty store and my coworker & i were like sir. for the love of fuck

Being up at 4-5 am is like loading in a level but the textures haven’t loaded all the way through yet.

i like this text post a lot because it’s a comparison between two extremely different styles of humor despite it, effectively, being the same joke