raise hell praise dale

it’s amazing how women are able to navigate crowded rooms without ever touching a palm to a man’s lower back

“don’t put all your eggs in one basket” uhhh where else am i supposed to put them lol. that’s my #eggbasket dumbass

ik i look good today bc this woman handed me a card w a bible verse on it

i have bad intentions to break inside thy barn and feed ur cattle pure uranium

me, a lesbian in a loving relationship: I WON'T ❌️❌️ SETTLE FOR A GUY WITH A FAKE JOB🗣🗣🗣 THEY SEEM SO DESPERATE FOR LOVIN 💃💃BUT BABY IM NOT 💅💅💅 GAVE MY HEART ❤️ WITH ZERO STIPULATIONS ❌️ NOW I TAKE CAREFUL CONSIDERATION 🤔🤔🤔 IM NOT KISSING ANY BOY THAT IS PASSIVE 🔥🔥🔥THEIR INDECISION IS PAINFULLY UNATTRACTIVE 🙄🙄 PAST ‼️ MISTAKES ‼️ ARE JUST NEW INFORMATION 💯 THESE DAYS 💃💃 IVE GOT 🗣🗣🗣 EXPECTATIONS 🥰🥰🥰

everywhere in philly smell like loud

bots for tyler

The new Harry Potter show is going to come out and there’s going to be a new character named Mahbleempus whose job it is to stand outside the hog warts express and inspect the children’s genitals to make sure they match their appearance and Harry Ron and Hermione are going to be like yaaayyy we love our genitals being inspected by Mahbleempus and the adults will be like thank god Mahbleempus is here to look at our childrens’ genitals so that they’re not violated and there’s going to be like a hundred screenrant articles titled like “the 10 Earth Shattering Lore Implications of Mahbleempus” and the Harry Potter fandom cockroaches on tumblr will be like wow is it just me or can Mahbleempus can kind of get it #marauders #yaoi

also this is something modern!sidney would have

i really wish simple things weren't so complicated within fandoms. a character can be problematic but interesting. a character can make a mistake but not be evil. a character can hold a position of authority and still be a victim. a character doesn't have to be perfect and pure and innocent to be a victim. a character doesn't have to be perfectly pure for you to like them. liking a character who's fucked up doesn't mean you support their every action. why is this so complicated