Teddy

You know what this adultery needs? SANDWICHES.

Official silly sign

Please- I need to adopt Izzy and wrap him in a fuzzy blanket and give him a kiss on the forehead. He's precious and deserves to be adopted

World Heritage Post

Op didn't stop on the part where they are also a love interest

dead wife montage but it's a henchman reminiscing about da boss after he got put six feet under. picking flowers before hiding the bodies, wiping cocaine from your nose after a big night, that long drive down the beach to find the bookie who squealed. where did the days go

i hope this email never finds you. i hope you are with the oul

one of my patients came in for an emergency visit, because she snapped the wire on her retainer watching the movie when MBJ took his shirt off she clenched her teeth so fucking hard she snapped it. that is the fucking funniest shit ever to me this tiny 17 year old girl thirsting so goddamn hard she busted steel

We interviewed her, obviously.

Such a developing story.

I love this story

This was a wild ride from start to finish

I know I say this a lot, But this is one of the best things on this website

Sophia is currently doing great in college, and I still get about one kid a month in the office who asked if this really happened.

I found it!! The original post!!

HAS SHE SEEN SINNERS

Preferably when she wasn’t wearing the retainer.

Together they create the full set.

tumblr black out poetry

“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.

Good Job.

do you think no one else has time travel

Happy one month anniversary to this post that has not allowed me a single day of fucking peace since I made it.

wow if only you had a time machine

Honestly having reached a billion notes I think it’s safe to say that in the Year of our lord 2041, this is the most popular tumblr post out there.

I’m killing your parents before you’re born

:)

Still here, why’d you hesitate @derinthescarletpescatarian

Your mum’s ability to hold up under active gunfire was really hot. I’m your dad now.

Isn’t that the plot of Terminator

Where do you think the plot for Terminator came from?

This is such a classic trainwreck post that has the vibes of a 2014 screenshot posted to Pinterest and then the last addition is just last Tuesday I can’t even

Imagine how I feel

It doesn’t have to

Yes it does.

Of course it has to, it gets a billion notes in 2041

My favorite banned terms on this site are "suicide prevention" and "safe sex"

Fuck nasty and kill yourself inmediately after

the number 1 rule of fanfic is have fun and be yourself. the number 2 rule is the average healthy adult male can lose roughly 2 liters of blood before dying.

As someone who is colourblind this post is fucking hilarious because they are in fact all the same fucking colour

things heating up in the fuckin uuhhhhhhhhh BLUE fandom 

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

why is it so hard for people to grasp that disabilities disable and chronic illnesses are chronic. yes even when it inconveniences you. yes even when your patience runs out