"the new pope is problematic" well folks it's the catholic fucking church so im not really sure where your hopes were at

when you grew up as a lonely uncool girl it will never stop haunting you by the way. you will meet a cool person at a bar or the train station or at a friend's party and you can wear your most stylish outfit and striking eye makeup and you will swear that they can see through all of the facade and see the lonely terribly insecure teenage girl you used to be who desperately wanted to connect and you will swear that they know that there is like an insurmountable gap between you. this will happen forever

the moment percy fell in love with annabeth was the moment she punched matt sloan in the face without so much as blinking twice and told him to “lay off” her friend

I’m sorry, but the confusion of why your bathroom doesn’t have a door far outweighs any feelings of horror this might evoke.

can’t afford door.. the horror here is the realities of life

So what fuck was your wife knocking on

this dick

It’s not even 4 words???

I’m terribly exhausted with myself

he dropped his eyes

PUT THOSE EYEBALLS BACK IN YOUR HEAD, SON

me: hey wanna see pics of my dog person: no me: *shows pictures anyway*