champion, stay down.

A recently published study by John Pachankis and Mark Hatzenbuehler has substantiated what’s called the “Best Little Girl in the World” hypothesis, first put forward in 1973 in a book by Andrew Tobias, then writing under a pseudonym. It’s the idea that young, closeted women deflect attention from their sexuality by investing in recognized markers of success: good grades, athletic achievement, elite employment and so on. Overcompensating in competitive arenas affords these women a sense of self-worth that their concealment diminishes.

…Deriving self-worth from achievement-related domains, like Ivy League admissions, is a common strategy among closeted women seeking to maintain self-esteem while hiding their stigma. The strategy is an effort to compensate for romantic isolation and countless suppressed enthusiasms. And it requires time-consuming study and practice, which conveniently provide an excuse for not dating.

Best of all, it distracts: “What love life? Look at my report card!”

…But the study does show that the longer a young woman conceals her sexual orientation, the more heavily she invests in external measures of success, potentially leading to undue stress and social isolation

Friend: cool! How many did you read this year?

“People like to hope, man, which is cool, but add some wisdom to that. Know the person is a human being and that they can fail at times. Be inspired in the right way.” [x]

- John Adedayo B. Adegboyega (b. March 17, 1992)

maria 

climbs a tree and scrapes her knee

her dress as got a tear

waltzes on her way to mass

whistles on the stairs

underneath her wimple she has curlers in her hair

even sings in the abbey 

she’s always late for chapel