. ݁₊Emmzie⟡ ݁. ⊹ ₊ ݁

Warnings:

-being hurt (NO BLOOD JUST A BUMP) In raph’s part.

-the reader and Leo having a toxic relationship for a lil bit

Raph being too rough with you

Raph’s a big guy. He knows to be gentle with you, but you always bounce back when he thinks he’s “too rough.” It’s comforting, knowing that you’re not as fragile as you look

That does NOT mean you’re not hurt, however. Sometimes, he pats too roughly or pushes too hard. It hurts, but you just don’t say anything because he always gets so guilty! I mean, he’s huge, and has lived with only other guys his whole life, so of course he’s gonna be a little rough!

But this time, he really hurt you. You two were play fighting, and he had shoved you into a wall on accident. He didn’t mean to push you that hard! You touched the back of your head, wincing at the bump forming and looked up at him. He would always mutter an apology, but after realizing you’re okay? This time, he just..

“Eh, you’ll be fine. Cmon.”

He basically just told you to rub some dirt on it. I mean, yeah, you’re fine, but he didn’t even say sorry!

And for the first time, your eyes began to water. You were angry, yeah, but also kinda offended. Did he just not care anymore?

“Raph, that hurt..” you tried to sound angry, but your voice got quieter with each word you said. He was such an asshole sometimes.

Seeing your tears, he panicked for a moment. He’s never made you cry before! He thought you’d just bounce back up and keep smacking his shell!

“Uh- oh.” For a moment, he debated telling you that you were fine, doubling down on the thing that made you cry. But, he didn’t. He scooped you up and gave you a hug. He wasn’t an emotional guy, but he knew what you liked.

“Sorry, babe- should’ve made sure. You forgive me?” He sounded so nervous! It almost made you feel guilty.

You nodded, giving him a squeeze.

He wasn’t a cuddly guy either, but he had his moments. Like this one.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 .

Leo’s criticism

Leo has always been the leader. His whole thing is correcting and guiding, so obviously that habit of his is going to flow into your relationship too.

At first, it was kinda sweet. He wanted the best for you! But when he got more comfortable with you? It was almost constant. “Fix your posture”, “quiet down”, “speak up”, all. The. Time. And it got worse too. “You talk too much,” “why are you so quiet?” “You’re very loud.” It builds up, and eventually, it makes you feel awful about yourself every time you go home after hanging out with him.

Eventually, you snapped. You were having fun! Mikey made a joke that made you laugh, and yeah, maybe it was a little loud, but that doesn’t mean he gets to shush you from across the room! He instantly killed the mood! Mikey just got quieter, but you were mad. Why does he think that’s okay??

“Can you not? Like it’s always something with you.” Your voice was harsher than you intended, but it was a buildup! He’s done this for weeks!

But, Leo was prideful, so he doubled down.

“What are you talking about?” Part of him was genuinely confused, but the other part knew what you meant.

His response just made you more angry. You were tired of being treated like you needed to be “corrected” around him! It was annoying, and it kinda hurt!

“I’m talking about you! Like why am I always doing something wrong to you? No one else says anything!” He wasn’t always like this, and that’s why it hurt so much. It left so much room for overthinking. Like, did he always think you were this.. wrong?

“I don’t know, you ever think it’s because you are always doing something wrong?”

You sat up further, your brows furrowed. The three other brothers just kinda looked at each other. They were nosey.

“Well, if I’m always doing something wrong, then why couldn’t you find someone that can hold up to your fucking standard? Too bad you had to settle.”

It was mean, but you just wanted him to feel the pain that you felt. He made you feel awful all the time. You rethink everything around him, and now it’s his turn to think. Why couldn’t HE find someone better? Oh yeah. You’re the only one who wants him.

You two didn’t talk for awhile after that.

A week went by. You felt horrible.

Maybe he was right; something WAS wrong with you.

As you lay in bed, ready to sleep, unable to get him off your mind, you hear a tap at your window.

You open it and Leo, bulky and awkward, climbs through. Your heart pounded in your chest. He would always text you before showing up, and you, for a moment, thought he wouldn’t talk to you ever again!

“Hey..” he started, trying to remember what he was going to say. Seeing you so shocked that he’d even show up made him forget everything.

You wanted to hug him. You missed him, but you didn’t know if he wanted that right now. However, leo can read you like a book, and he opened his arms.

His hand cradled the back of your head as you tried not to tear up. Part of you wasn’t apologetic, but you REALLY missed him.

“I thought you didn’t wanna see me anymore.” You choked out. “I mean, you already have to correct me so much, I thought that our argument was the last straw.” You sniveled, hiding your face by burrowing in his plastron.

“Oh, sweetheart..” one thing about Leo, positive or negative, is that he always made you feel so small. You felt safe against him.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize how much I criticize you. I’ve always been the one to correct, yanno? It’s my fault. I’m so so sorry. I missed you so much. You’re perfect.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, not pressuring you to respond yet.

You’d forgive him. You always do.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 .

(Reader is described as being a “sensitive pushover, but I SWEARR this isn’t a stereotypical petite y/n fic. Like it’s a character flaw that gets worked on I PROMISEE. Fawn response representation🥹✌️)

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　

Raph isn’t a music person.

He doesn’t listen to much music, but that changed when he met you.

You recommended songs; he’d find time to listen to them, and it was his way of showing he cared. You knew it, which made him happy.

Not that he’d ever say it.

Which is why you two are arguing. It’s hard being in a relationship with someone who forgets to act like they like you sometimes. it doesn’t help that talking to him is like talking to a brick wall; a very mean brick wall.

He can’t accept that he’s wrong, that he said something mean, or that MAYBE you deserve to be treated better than what feels like “an upgraded friend.”

That’s honestly what it feels like! You are a very understanding person, you have to be in order to even LIKE raph, but you have your limits. You understand he’s lived only with his brothers and father his whole life, so of course he’s not gonna know how to treat a girl, but it’s frustrating! And the worst part? You’d feel a lot better if he just apologized! Once again, you’re understanding when it comes to him bottling up emotions, but you have your limits! ESPECIALLY when affects you.

But no, apparently you’re just “sensitive.”

And you were. You were a sensitive pushover, and you knew it. Sometimes, it feels like you have to be in order to be around him. He’s just mean. Of course, you’re working on having a backbone, but he’s a scary guy. You know he wouldn’t hurt you, but when he’s angry, you just go into damage control.

It hurt.

So, you ignored him. Since having a girlfriend is such a pain, maybe you should just leave him alone for a few days. Best case scenario, he acts like this little issue never happened.

Which is what you thought did happen.

Raph asked if he could come over after a few days, and to think of some song recommendations if you had any. You obliged, happy to see your boyfriend again after three long days of torture.

So imagine your surprise when he sat you down on your own bed, forcing himself to look you in the eyes as he spoke. Part of it felt practiced, the words too thoughtful for him to think up on the spot. He probably thought of some of this on the way there, knowing him.

“Look, you can’t let me be rude to you and then try to ignore how it makes y’feel. I- uh..” his grip loosened as he lost eye contact with you. “I do the same thing. Not the letting people be assholes part, but the uh.. ignoring part. I can kinda understand you in that way, but not the other one. Why do you let me act like that? Slap me upside the shell or something next time!” He punctuated with a pat on the shoulder, finally looking back at you. It was a sad attempt at ALMOST humor, which made you squirm a bit. Now it was your turn to hide.

It was hard explaining why without sounding pathetic, which made you embarrassed, but he never scoffed or mocked you as you spoke.

“It’s just how i’ve always been. I dunno, I just hate causing problems. I’d rather just let it blow over.”

“But that ain’t fair.”

“It’s better than you being mad for longer.”

Silence. Long, uncomfortable silence. Once again, you went into damage repair, trying to keep him from being upset or confused or anything negative. You hated silence.

“Well, it’s not like you’re not allowed to be-“

“Shh- I’m thinkin’ about what to say. Jeez, I ain’t mad at you.”

Another long silence. Your leg bounced, nervous.

Then, he finally spoke.

“Y’know I love you, right? M’not gonna leave, or yell, or hurt you. Ever. You know that? You don’t have to worry about making me mad, because everyone knows I got a temper, so me being mad about something is gonna happen a lot. What you need to worry about is learning how to get used to people bein’ mad. I think if you can work on your fear- or whatever you got- of people being mad at you, I can work on my temper. Deal?”

You bite your cheek, nod your head, and he pulls you into his lap.

“I need to tell you I love you more, don’t I? Is that why you’re scared? Gotta be a part of it.”

You nod.

“Hm. Noted.”

You two lay on the bed, you in his lap, and your head on his plastron. After a moment, he kissed the top of your head and mumbled:

“You got any music for me?”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　

Donatello

-This can go one of two ways

-“Hey I do that and I’m not autisic”

OR

-“Wait I do that and I’m not autistic..” (said with intense thought)

-Undiagnosed king

-he’s probably the one to understand having an autistic s/o the most. He’s done his research (for you AND him).

-He’s so sweet but will sometimes try to teach you about your own autism 😭😭

-he’s a know-it-all with no limits I fear

-he also can’t take a hint very well. When he gets into a relationship, he’s a lot more comfy when it comes to yapping on and on and on about his inventions.

-you will very bluntly have to tell him to shut up for a moment. And surprisingly, if you explain, he won’t get offended at all.

Raphael

-tbh your autism probably went over his head until you told him you had it

-Not because he doesn’t pay attention, but because the turtles have lived underground and separated from people for so long, they also do not get social cues. He noticed your picky eating and your sensory issues, yes, but he just thought the way you interacted with people socially was just a part of your personality! Like, doesn’t everyone have a social battery? Who cares if yours runs out faster than others, you’re still you, and he loves you!

-But he doesn’t think like this as a way to dismiss it, he just didn’t realize that some of your traits had a name. To him, you are you!

-He loves that you can be blunt with people that was part of the appeal for him!

-you don’t like mushy stuff? He doesn’t either!

-hate people/talking sometimes? He’s in the same boat!

-meltdown? He has those too!

-‘He a lil confused but he got the spirit’ -anon

Leonardo

-He’d be a bit more confused about it

-like raph, he just saw you as you, not realizing some of your traits had a name

-HOWEVER, I feel like he’s more likely to either try to “fix” some of your “problems”

STAY WITH ME LET ME EXPLAIN

Or try to “help” you.

-like picky eating? He’ll say smth like “That’s good for you! Why do you always eat junk food?”

-I need you to know that this phase does NOT last long however, and he feels AWFUL about it afterwards.

-he just loves you so much and he’s so used to leading/fixing problems with his brothers behavior, it kinda oozes (haha get it) into your relationship too.

-after that he’s a lot like Donnie. Understanding king 100%

Mikey

-I usually hc Mikey as having adhd, but I’m not sure for bayverse. Like- maybe? I see him having it when it comes to social cues and stuff, but I dunno.

-if so, you and him are almost kinda in the same boat.

-but he’s also super sensitive. Like- say you’re overstimulated, he won’t shut up, and you tell him to be quiet? He’s gonna think ur mad at him and get all sulky. HOWEVER, this doesn’t last long and he gets used to it. He eventually learns the signs of you getting stressed out, and has learned to back off when you start showing them.

-touchy guy. If you like touch? Good. He will squeeze. If you don’t like touch? It’ll take a minute for him to learn that.