sleep :)

considering everyone in the family was totally accepting of the fact he could lay an egg, everyone in the family thus is aware of and loves their trans platypus

There’s also a scene where a professional platypus hunter makes mention of the venomous spurs of the male platypus—as i recall, Doofenshmirtz is surprised, and questions Perry about it, only to get a shrug in response and no indication that Perry has spurs in the first place…. 

I’ll never stop fucking reblogging this

this is an advanced joke

We let hozier say fuck once and now he’s gone completely mad with power.

fred and george charmed all the books in the hogwarts library so that all the text was in comic sans

as a society we have to start bullying rich ivy league kids more. they’re like “i go to harvard” and you gotta be like “what? never heard of it”

i got a lot of shit about this post a few days ago but ever since that scandal broke? crickets

I am, unfortunately, all panic and no disco

Didn’t they have a rival who was pretty much just a straight up supervillain?

His name was Neville and he controlled the government

Wax museum but one of the dudes is real and they don’t tell you who

i’m the only thing preventing the mailman and the vacuum from killing my entire family

this was such a confusing and frightening post before i read the name of the blog that posted it

@one-time-i-dreamt

Facts

Did u cum babe

bro we’re at a funeral

The ides of March is coming up what’s everyone getting me?

i never understood how we’ve reinvented heiroglyphics until now

I remember first learning that you can cry from any emotion, that emotions are chemical levels in your brain and your body is constantly trying to maintain equilibrium. so if one emotion sky rockets, that chemical becomes flagged and signals the tear duct to open as an exit to release that emotion packaged neatly within a tear. Everything made sense after learning that. That sudden stability of your emotions after crying. How crying is often accompanied by the inability to feel any other emotion in that precise moment. And it is especially beautiful knowing that it is even possible to experience so much beauty or love or happiness that your body literally can’t hold on to all of it. So what I’ve learned is that crying signifies that you are feeling as much as humanely possible and that is living to the fullest extent. So keep feeling and cry often and as much as needed

SHIT WHAT

oh to be a round little bird and to say beep from time to time