Bananach

idk why fingers in the mouth is so hot but it is

try letting your chicken fingers cool off before you eat them

you remember when “IDFWU” came out and everybody got out all their anger from their ex. We were cleansed. Thanks to Pastor Big Sean

Fun fact: There is no scarcity of food, water, or housing. It’s just distributed excessively to certain people.

I beg to differ but okay…

You can “differ” all you want But facts are facts

*me sees it raining* me: good the plants deserve this

You swerve to avoid a squirrel. Unknown to you, the squirrel pledges a life debt to you. In your darkest hour, the squirrel arrives.

why are the ufo sightings always in the usa whats so special about america *slams fists on table* the aliens need to do a world tour its not all about breaking the usa market!

@aliens come to brazil

i feel bad for twins that aren’t equally attractive

I like that their family can’t decide what to do with the red vases.

not many people know metallica opened for jesus’ birth

(x)

I’m dead at his face in the last one like “Did you even try?”

And then when he gets pushed he’s like “Wait no let him try!”

his composure is just everything I aspire to be

OMG IT’S BACK!

CHARLES IS THE BEST OMG

Like how he stands there as if, “Okay, I’ll be perfectly still and we’ll see if you can hit me this time. Come on, it is like I’m giving you a head start.” He’s more annoyed with his cuff link than the wanna be assassin.

FOREVER REBLOGGING THIS.

You all do know who his mother is right? You know the woman who stayed home during the bombing of London and drove Jeeps in WW2. They are trained to be final boss overlord level composed at age 2.

His sister, Princess Anne, was the victim of an attempted kidnapping. The guy pointed a gun at her and told her to get out her car. She replied: “Not bloody likely.” And tried to kick him.

I just the wikipedia article about this and…wow. David Kang, the student who fired the shots, turns out to have been firing blanks from a starting pistol, not actual bullets. He was sentenced to community service, went on to get his MBA and is now a barrister. So…I guess that turned out pretty well for everybody.