leave me lonely.

“ good point” he noted before glancing back her way at the idea of why wouldn’t he take it. “ figured all that time away didn’t do me any good” he admitted. That was what worried him. That he was all out of ideas now. That he wasn’t as skilled anymore. “ ooof if I ever get that old and am performing you need to tell me to stop”

“ I’ve been feeling stuck lately. Professionally I mean. I just feel like I’m not me anymore “ @aylinxc-s

"Oh, come on!" She wasn't going to let a small break stop him from pursuing something he loved, no matter how old he got. "It'll be like riding a bike."

Being stagnant was definitely something Aylin could relate to. She only wished there was something in her own career that could revitalise her, instead of having to hear about the Mr and Mrs Lenstrom's incurable relationship problems three times a week.

"You should do it," she says, her tone final as if it was her own decision to make. "Live. a little, Gav. You know you won't regret it if you do, but you might if you don't."

where: choose your own adventure bbys 😘

“My little brother is coming to visit again, and usually when my family comes to visit we spend a lot of time on the beach, but this time he asked me to show him around town. What do you think the best places to take him would be?” Felix had lived in town for a few years now but he honestly hadn’t done everything Aurora Bay had to offer, so he was hoping for some good suggestions.

"What's your little brother like? Is he more relaxed and easy going or is he more the adventurous type?"

He watches her with a cross between cautious respect and hesitant belief, because Declan can catch what he thinks is even just enough hopefulness. But that’s the part that tightens his chest, and it keeps his words stuck in his throat while he tries to read the calmness Aylin holds in that moment. 

Because hope can be volatile, especially the kind his brother is carrying for her.

“I’m sure he does,” Dec finally answers. More than he knows how to say, he mentally adds onto it, but for Declan, it doesn’t need to be shown through words. He reaches up to rub the back of his neck, and he gives Aylin a small chuckle, doing everything in his power to not allow it to sound hollow. In his disbelief, he wants for the best for his brother, he spent most of the aftermath of this sifting through knee-deep shit, and if Aylin throws him a line out of it, there’s no doubt he’ll reach for it.

“I’ll always be in his corner. But I think if anyone can ground him, it’s you." He isn't so sure he should say that aloud, but it's out there. "I also know it’s also not your responsibility. So just, if you can promise me one thing, make the cut quick if there’s nothing there. I want him to have what makes him happy, but don't leave him holding onto nothing.”

She wasn't about to get into what was or wasn't her responsibility, it was neither the time nor the place for it. "I wouldn't be here with him tonight if I didn't have some hope we could make it through this," Aylin assures him. "I wouldn't play with him like that." Even in her darkest moments, she couldn't allow herself to be that cruel.

"You're a good brother." Aylin could only hope that her husband was the same in return. "Enjoy your night, Declan—" she smiles warmly, catching Kodi out of the corner of her eye and making her way over to him.

A community diaster meant that the emergency workers were doing double time -- Billie hadn't left the fire station in days, but it seemed like things were under control, so the chief cut her and sent her home. Walking down the street, she paused as she saw the other. She was exhausted, but she couldn't stop her nature.

"You okay over there?"

At the call out of another voice, Aylin stopped her brisk walk. "Oh, I'm okay. Just wishing I had more hands," she laughs casually, holding the trays of food up. A wave of concern came over here, the woman seeming more than a little run down. "Are you okay?"

where: lawyer's office, close to 8pm

With a stony expression on his face, Kodi remains two steps ahead of Aylin physically (and what felt like two steps behind her in every other sense) in the elevator that was taking them both from the fifth floor down to reception.

He's done plenty to accustom himself with accepting loss, it was the scale of this one that was making it more difficult to be okay with. There was still so much to say but if he had learned one thing that summer it was that everything got exponentially worse when he opened his mouth.

Kodi could have easily kept to his vow of silence in the start of legal proceedings to call an official time of death on the vows they had made to one another until the lights flickered and the previously smooth motion of the elevator stuttered to a halt that made him stumble slightly.

He steadies himself just in time before the lights diminished completely and the doors remained firmly closed.

Keeping her eyes trained on her phone and off the back of her soon-to-be ex-husband, Aylin thought about taking the stairs to avoid having to ride the elevator. Her high heels would make her feet bleed but would that be better than the alternative? Considering how quiet Kodi had been, maybe they could get through a short elevator ride without argument.

As the carriage jostled then stopped and Aylin held on white-knuckled to the handrail as they were plunged into darkness. With no hesitation, Aylin marches into action.

"No, no, no, no—" her fingers found the buttons and she mashed them all repeatedly before making way over to the emergency button to no avail. No line rung out, no voice told them it was going to be okay. "This can't be happening."

Realising that the lift was not just stuck but completely without power, her panic started to set in. Short, shallow breaths begun as she whined, "Oh my god, I'm going to throw up."

It had practically become a ritual. Stella Davenport was making herself a local, and in doing so, was becoming quite the regular at the smoothie shop. She loved coffee, craved it often, but caffeine sometimes seemed to have the wrong effect, and would make her spin out a bit. She thought settling for a daily green smoothie should hold her over; scratch the proverbial itch. She found herself there, yet again, although the place was crawling with people. She found what seemed to be the last table outside, spreading out her color-coded binder, multiple highlighters — vibrantly neon, and her beloved juice. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught someone looking around for a seat, so she waved them down. “Hi! I’ve got a seat here, if you need one. I don’t bite, I promise! Well, unless you ask extra nicely.”

With a small chuckle, she questions with a quick "are you sure?" before taking the open seat opposite her before the invitation could be rescinded. "I didn't think it would be so busy, but I guess great minds think alike."

She's rambling and she knows it -- and all it does is prove correct the theory that she's always had about herself: that she would crumble quickly under police questioning.

"Like, you can look at my phone, even."

@aylinxc-s

"You don't need to do that," Aylin assures her with a sniff. Because the truth was, it didn't matter if Kodi had texted her or not. If he'd completely ignored her or confessed his undying love. If they'd been together just once or a hundred times. The trust was broken. Aylin would always feel the sliver of doubt, a gnawing feeling that she'd have to be stupid or comatose to ignore.

Aylin decided she wanted to be neither.

Wiping under her bleary eyes, there was no way she was returning back to the festivities outside. Whatever spell Aylin was under had officially broken and now she only longed to be alone.

"Thank you." Aylin says the words and means it. "And I'm sorry to.. ambush you while you're trying to enjoy your night."

Kodi makes questionable decisions. Some of which Declan thinks he might never understand, but what he does know is his brother is a good guy through any of his faults. 

Though Dec isn’t there to muse about Kodi's persuasive abilities, he is suddenly extremely focused on the next thing Aylin says. Answered first with the shift of his eyes to hers to seek out sincerity. Whether she meant it, or if she is just talking, and Dec? He doesn’t want to really say the wrong thing. He also isn’t sure he likes harboring this information.

“I’m not saying this to be a stick in the mud, y’know, but it isn’t the magic of prom having you talk like that right?” he finally speaks, slow at first, and cautious, as if he were toeing the edge of something he doesn’t want to see unravel. “Because you know how he'd feel hearing that."

Because there, tightening his stomach with some worry, Declan worries then that Kodi’s wishful thinking might get his hopes up so high that if in the end it doesn’t work, it would be a free fall crash. “He did some dumb shit, but if it counts for something, I do think he’s learned his lesson. He’s been licking his wounds from it for ages.”

It certainly did feel like a miracle how easily they were able to come back together after everything. And while she can sense that Declan is playing the part of wingman for his brother, Aylin doesn't mind it in the slightest.

The mention of the dumb shit gives her pause, her stomach clenching tightly. Declan would likely always look up to his older brother, maybe even find it hard to see his faults. Aylin knew what being close with your siblings was like, who was to say she wouldn't defend Gavin's actions just as fiercely. However wrong they may be.

With a sip of her nearly empty wine, Aylin chooses not to fixate on the past. Her and Kodi were here in an attempt to rekindle some kind of future, weren't they?

location: skylark rooftop bar

"Yo, gorgeous -- Saw you at prom," Peter prefaces briefly as he approached before he really gets to what's been on his mind since then.

"Quick query, angel, but are you big dumb?"

It was ironic to know now that perhaps the only person Kodi ever looked out for Kodi.

While she was taken aback by the bluntness of his comment, it was hard to deny the truth of it, especially given how the night had ended up going. Aylin was in fact 'big dumb' and it was good to know other people could see it too.

"Hello to you too, Peter—" she replies, placing her phone down in front of her. "I had a momentary lapse in judgement that night." Not that she needed to justify herself to him, however, she did it anyway. "Don't worry, won't be happening again."

She had always been the kind of beautiful that didn't need any external assistance to be accentuated. It didn't matter if she was in designer or if she was dressed for comfort to run errands, she was always the most striking woman in the room.

( And he was always the most idiotic for ever letting himself forget that. )

"I would say this is just any old one I pulled from the wardrobe but I was in fact making an effort tonight, I was angling for that exact compliment from you."

Mild a success as it was, it was one he would treasure after insults had become more of a norm to hear from her than anything positive.

"Good call," He remarks, informing her then that he would take care of that so she could find them somewhere to enjoy those drinks. The queue at the bar was relatively small and there was no real reason for him to order four wines instead of two other than an attempt at being fun and hoping to keep the atmosphere between them light.

He makes his way to where she was with two glasses being carried in each hand, careful with how he transported them to neither spill any or drop one. Placing two down in front of her and the other two in front of the seat he then sits himself in, he brings one of his close enough to the edge of the table that it's easily picked up so he could take a drink from it after he speaks.

"There you go, I'm fast-tracking this potential tour."

Two glasses placed in front of her and a faint blush on her cheeks, they talked as they toured the school that raised Aylin. She held her tongue about where the various bullying incidents occurred, choosing to focus more on the small places she found some comfort. The library, the science room. Once back inside the prom, they drunk more and took a turn around the dancefloor.

When wine goes to her head, she excuses herself to the ladies room and Kodi gives her a look that tells her don't be long. It's an easy request to oblige, she doesn't want to be apart from him either. Every step feels like walking on air as Aylin carries the wistful smile to herself all the way towards the back of the auditorium where the bathrooms are located.

But when she emerges from them, she is something different.

Eyes puffy and nose now tinged red from crying, Aylin makes her escape out the side exit. No one stops her, no one attempts to try and conversate and for that, she is grateful. All she needs is to leave this place behind. This school is just another reminder of her trying to make peace with the places and people who hurt her. It never worked, it only meant more heartbreak.

Once outside, there are a few rogue attendees chattering under the lights. Aylin makes her way to the parking lot but halts when she remembers that Kodi was her ride. She's grabbing her phone out of her purse when her name is called but the brunette cannot even face him, choosing to keep her back to him.

"Go back inside, Kodi." Her warning is a pathetic plea. Her hand goes to her face as if she can push the tears back inside, but she's spent far too long trying to let her feelings out that it seems they can no longer be tamed. "God! I can't believe I let myself look like such an idiot. Again!"

"If the opportunity is there, why wouldn't you take it?" she asks. Aylin isn't going to point out that he's no longer married and it's not like much is tying him to this town in particular because she's not sure if it'll come across as a good thing. But maybe that's more of a projection on her end. "The Rolling Stones are still touring and they're ancient. I'm sure you've still got some good years left to hang out in the back of a tour bus." Aylin chuckles to herself. "What's spurred this on?"

"I mean -- do you think he could fix it? Is there something you'd want him to do to prove it to you?"

@aylinxc-s

Lou posed a great question, and it was one that Aylin had mulled over many times. "I don't think there's anything he could do to earn back my trust. I'd always be waiting for him to do it again and that's not fair on either of us." It was well rehearsed and sounded convincing enough, the mask she wore shiftly slightly amidst the silence. "I just wish he'd never done it," Aylin sighs. It seems silly to say something so obvious aloud. "We weren't in the best place before but at least we were working on it."

At least that's what Aylin was thinking. Clearly Kodi had a different idea.