When you draw your blades, you draw me.

my devoted but dangerously unstable knight will be hearing about this

sex is a distraction from your true purpose in life which is to go to the aquarium and look at the fish and go "wooooooaaah.... fishies". cmon guys we all need to lock in.

Alright your Discord avatar and tumblr avatar are locked in a closet for 7 minutes ala 7 Minutes In Heaven. What happens

so fucking humbling to be like “no I like that character a normal amount” and then you can literally feel your heart rate spike at a mention of them like a dog that just heard the word “treat”

saddest thing that can happen to 2 guys with freak shit going on is people calling them boyfriends. yes i know theyve got something homosexual going on but brother it is NOT that

currently running the Sweetie Pie Challenge where i dont hit anyone with a tire iron as hard as i can for seven days

failed

years later still thinking about the time i was being interviewed for a judicial clerkship and the judge asked me what i do in my free time and being a student i was like uh idk videogames and this very old very venerable respected jurist looked at me over his little glasses and said quote "oh, what kind? I love Dark Souls."

my liege is that item on the shelf too high for you to reach? fear not, i shall grab it for you. HNNNNNGHHH MMMMMHHGGH HHHHHHHH (cant reach it either)well shit my liege