Tonight feels chill...


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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Not today Justin

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@atta651
Tonight feels chill...

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When abled people are involved, the concept of "doing it once in a while for a few seconds doesn't mean you can do it consistently on command like it's nothing" is easily understood.
For example, if someone is able to walk outside without a jacket in the cold to get the mail, everyone would easily understand that they'd still need a jacket if they were outside for a prolonged period of time. If someone is able to hold their breath underwater for a few seconds, everyone would easily understand that they'd still need an oxygen tank in order to stay underwater indefinitely.
But when disabled people are involved, that concept is somehow forgotten. You can stand for a few seconds? You must not actually need that wheelchair. You can socialize once in a long while if the conditions are exactly right? You must not actually struggle to socialize and any struggle you think you have is just fear and negativity. You can be physically active for an hour on a good day? You must not actually be too disabled to work. You have a lot of knowledge on a topic because it's a special interest of yours? You must be "smart" and any bad grades you get are because you're lazy.
here are some more cats 🍓
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if Open Link in New Tab is wrong then baby i dont want to be right

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Gothic literature must be cursed to forever be misinterpreted by mainstream public because how did this happen
Dracula book: an evil count who only sees the world as a resource to be drained for his own pleasure is stopped by the group of people who deeply care for each other
Dracula in media: a tragic romantic hero, main love interest of one of the protagonists who must be liberated from her dull little life
Frankenstein book: any human has capacity for evil when completely abandoned and shunned by the world and the people who brought him into it
Frankenstein in media: don't play God because it's against nature's laws
Jekyll and Hyde book: repression and only caring about external appearances can cause your worst impulses to indulge themselves in dangerous ways if ignored for too long
Jekyll and Hyde in media: what if there was two of the same guy but one of them was evil and gross?
I never liked those posts that reduce the Disney princesses to “girl who overacts about something and dramatically flings herself down and bawls” (super popular in the early 10’s and somehow that’s how a shocking majority view the classics now) but after an Aladdin (1992) rewatch, it’s especially egregious that they ever included Jasmine in that.
This part. This is the part I’m talking about
This is not a woman falling to pieces because her father won’t let her marry a man she just met.
This is a woman born to a life she has very little say in. She has never had a genuine friend (besides a tiger). She is facing a marriage to a man she doesn’t know and doesn’t like but duty (and the law) demands it. So she took a risk, ran away, ran to a world she doesn’t know or understand and when she landed in trouble (serious, serious trouble) a stranger came to her aid. She finally (finally!) made a real connection with someone but they didn’t get much time together before the guards showed up and she had to reveal who she was.
This moment when she’s crying her heart out? It comes after she’s been told that the first person she ever connected with, the first person to be genuinely interested in her for who she is and not what she is, the first real friend she has ever made, was executed… because of her.
She believes a good, innocent person has lost their life because of her actions, and what’s more, it brings home the reality for her that she cannot have a normal life or normal relationships, because see the consequences one little attempt wrought?
I actually love this trope. People treat crying like some kind of moral failure. Boys shouldn't cry, girls *can* cry, but that's also what makes them inferior. If this is not an example of toxic masculity, I don't know what is.
Crying is normal. Even if it's over something trivial. We all face a lot of struggles in their lives, whether we acknowledge it or not. Something minor might end up breaking the camel's back.
Anyway, here's one of my favorite scenes in Beauty and the Beast:
Belle's reaction is completely understandable. I think Mrs. Potts put it best: "The girl lost her father and her freedom all in one day." That's not overreacting!
Thank you so much for adding Belle!
Really, none of the classic princesses deserve the misinterpretation.
Cinderella?
Again, this is not after someone told her “yOu CaN’t MaRrY a MaN yOu JuSt MeT”—this is after she went to great lengths to get ready for the ball, adhering to the intentionally difficult (meant to be impossible) stipulations set by her abusive step-mother for her to be allowed to attend (when really she was invited and had as much right as the others to attend). She made that dress (I can’t recall off the top of my head if the classic animated version was also her mother’s old dress she restyled or not but still, she put in a ton of work on top of all the extra house work) and what did her step-family do? They tore to shreds while she was wearing it. Of course she’s lost hope: it’s the final straw after years and years of doggedly remaining optimistic despite constant harsh treatment.
Let’s go to another favourite: Mulan.
Mulan’s just had the worst day.
She tried her hardest to live up to her family’s and her society’s expectations and vision of a perfect bride but she failed. Not only did it go wrong, but she was publicly humiliated by the Matchmaker—by extension, humiliating her family.
Granted, her family has been kind and sympathetic about the whole thing. Her father even goes to encourage her, assuring her of his unconditional love for her and his confidence that she’ll get it right next time.
She’s just beginning to smile when the drums pound and news of war reaches their village. Her father—her beloved father who’s already a veteran and lives with a disability—is expected as the only male in their family to suit up and head out in the morning.
Mulan can’t help. Nothing she says will be listened to and she can’t take his place (until, of course, she thinks of a way to do so which this moment of crying it out in the rain leads to—score one for having a good cry and clearing your head).
There’s of course more. Take any princess’ dramatic crying momentTM and review the context and I’ll bet you’ll see it’s never as trivial as some have framed it. And, yes, like prev pointed out, it’s this awful thing of people believing boys can’t cry and girls can but then they can never be taken seriously.
Crying is healthy. And crying in response to emotional distress is totally normal. Writers and storytellers across the ages have understood it and portrayed it.
I think Aurora gets a lot of pushback for this too, but consider:
- she's not being told "no" to marrying a man she just met. Marriage to Philip as she met him in the woods was not a conversation. She just wanted to meet up with him later and was told "you must never see that young man again"
- she's told this because she IS supposed to be married to a prince (who is Philip but she doesn't know this yet) and she actually does NOT want to be married to a man she just met!
- she just found out her aunts have been hiding this/lying to her her whole life, she's royalty, AND she's had parents this whole time!! That's gonna fuck anyone up bro!!
Don’t overlook paternity leave because it’s a hugely important feminist issue
Celebrating fatherhood with official paternity leave policies challenges traditional gender roles and empowers parents in the workplace. It’s one of those rare issues where men’s rights activists and feminists can find common ground with a mutually beneficial cause. It even has an impact on LGBTQ equality.
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I’ve reblogged a lot of posts today about why paid paternity leave (or just in general all parents regardless of gender being entitled to the same amount of paid parental leave) is such an important social issue, and these posts have made a lot of great points about why gender equality in parental leave is such a massively important issue for equality, such as:
- It’s important for LGBT+ parents who don’t fit the cis-hetero mold of one mother and one father.
- It’s an important feminist issue for reducing the second shift: when only one parent gets adequate parental leave, it’s only natural for a pattern to develop that the only parent who got adequate parental leave takes on the lion’s share of childcare. However, if both parents get adequate parental leave, then it’s more likely for a pattern to develop of sharing childcare duties. This is obviously massively important for reducing how much women’s careers are affected by having children.
- If the mother has post-partum health issues (anything from recovering from a C-section or other physical traumas, to post-partum depression and/or anxiety) it’s incredibly unfair to expect her partner to just go back to work immediately instead of allowing her partner to stay home and help with childcare duties. When someone is recovering from having a baby, it can be really important for their partner to stay home to help care for them and the baby.
However, one important point I haven’t seen brought up in why equal paid parental is so important for social equality is how important it is for reducing hiring discrimination.
By that I mean, when a country has *only* guaranteed maternity leave, but either no paternity leave (or really short paternity leave of a few weeks like the U.K. has), this is only going to raise the risk of hiring discrimination against women.
So if a company is choosing between two candidates for a position: one is a young woman and the other is a young man, if the country this company is in has a maternity leave policy of several months or more, but paternity leave is either just a few weeks (or completely non-existent), the company will look at the woman as riskier and less reliable to hire than the man.
So equal paid parental leave leads to more equality in the job market, because it means companies are less likely to see women as riskier and less reliable to hire. If everyone, not just women, has the same length of parental leave, everyone runs the same risk of needing to go on leave for the same amount of time.
There’s no reason not to demand that all parents regardless of gender receive equal paid parental leave. All parents and all children benefit from it.
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it exists to divide the working class. All labour is skilled labour. Yes including that one. Yes, including that one too.
Do you know what's unskilled labour? Owning capital. There's no labour involved, thus requires no skill. And you can tell because people can be born into owning capital.
"Fat Tiger" by "Uncle Bum" (不二馬大叔).
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I seriously cannot believe that I haven’t come across this tutorial before! This tutorial by ElenaLeetah is on How to Make Lightweight Wings, and the end result is absolutely incredible!
Check out the original on Deviantart: http://elenaleetah.deviantart.com/art/Tutorial-How-to-make-light-weight-wings-Kamael-348626950
This seamless trim technique is a method I’ve been using for years to add custom trim to my costumes without any top-stitching at all. Similar in a way to bias tape, but with many key differences in implementation and results. No one taught me this technique, but now I’m teaching it to you! Please read through all the instructions below before asking any further questions, and happy trim-making! C:
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Blanc and his Watsons 🔎💕
I see that "learned helplessness" is the hot new psychological term getting wildly misused. the phrase you're looking for is "weaponized incompetence," babes
weaponized incompetence is when your partner does chores shitty on purpose so that you stop asking them to do chores. learned helplessness is when you've experienced so much trauma that you've developed the mindset that you can't meaningfully change your situation and have become accordingly passive.
if your partner is exhibiting learned helplessness they aren't manipulating you, they're displaying a trauma response.