Atomic Wizard

• Cowboy Hat

• Cheese Wheel

• Maple Syrup

• Cowboy Boots

• Jar of Honey

• Duck Egg

• Baseball-sized Diamond

• Goat Milk

Michiganders flirting: You're my little Michigan cherry

Volume

Note that most things are two times greater than the previous, but some measurements have become obsolete, making the contemporary system convoluted.  The English system follows a 2ⁿ system while the metric system follows a 10ⁿ system.

1 minim ≈ 1 drop of water

20 minim = 1 fluid scruple

3 fluid scruples = 60 minim = 1 fluid dram/drachm (dr)

4 fluid scruples = 80 minim = 1 teaspoon (tsp)

3 teaspoons (tsp) = 1 tablespoon (tbsp) = 4 fluid drams/drachms (dr)

2 tablespoons (tbsp) = 1 fluid ounce (oz)

4 fluid ounces (oz) = 1 jack

8 fluid ounces (oz) = 1 cup = 2 jacks

A “cup” used to be referred to as “gill/jill” (gi).

2 cups = 1 pint (pt)

2 pints (pt) = 1 quart (qt)

2 quarts (qt) = 1 pottle

4 quarts (qt) = 1 gallon (gal) = 2 pottles

1 peck = 2 gallons (gal)

1 kenning = 2 pecks

1 bushel = 4 pecks = 2 kennings

1 strike = 2 bushels

1 coomb = 2 strikes

1 seam = 2 coombs

Weight

Note that many of these things stem from the dram/drachm, which was something to which a common person would have access and be able to conceptualize.

1 grain (gr) ≈ a seed of cereal

1 dram/drachm (dr) = the weight of silver in a Greek coin, the drachma

16 dram/drachm (dr) = 1 ounce (oz)

7,000 grains (gr) = 16 ounces (oz) = 1 pound (lb)

“lb” stands for libra, Latin for “scales/balance”

7 pounds (lbs) = 1 nail

14 pounds (lbs) = 1 stone (st) = 2 nails

28 pounds (lbs) = 4 nails = 2 stones (st) = 1 tod

1 hundredweight (qwt) = 4 tods = 112 pounds (lbs)

1 ton (t) = 2,240 pounds (lbs) = 160 stone (st) = 20 hundredweights (qwt)

1 slug = a mass that accelerates by 1 ft/s² when a force of one pound is exerted on it ≈ 32.17 pounds (lbs)

Length

Note that many of these measurements stem from estimates on the body: digits, fingers, palms, hands, cubits (the forearm), fathom (outstretched arms); or things that people would see at construction sites: nail, rod, chain.

1 line ≈ a poppyseed

1 barleycorn = 4 lines

3 barleycorn = 1 inch (in)

1 digit = ¾ inch (in)

1 finger = ⅞ inch (in)

1 inch (in) = 1,000 thous (th)

1 nail = 3 digits = 2¼ inches (in)

1 palm = 3 inches (in)

1 hand = 4 inches (in)

1 shaftment = 6 inches (in)

1 link = 7.92 inches (in) = 1% of a standard chain

1 span = 3 palms = 9 inches (in)

1 foot (ft) = 12 inches (in) = 4 palms = 3 hands = 2 shaftments

1 cubit = 18 inches (in) = 1½ feet (ft)

1 yard (yd) = 3 feet (ft) = 2 cubits = 36 inches (in)

1 ell = 45 inches (in)

1 fathom (ftm) = 2 yards (yd) = 6 feet (ft) = 72 inches (in)

1 rod/perch/pole = 16½ feet (ft)

1 chain (ch) = 4 rods = 22 yards (yd) = 66 feet (ft) = 100 links

1 furlong/stade (fur) = 40 rods = 660 feet (ft)

A furlong was considered the distance a plow team could furlough without rest.

1 mile (mi) = 5,280 feet (ft) = 1,760 yards (yd) = 8 furlongs/stades (fur)

The obscure numbering in contemporary feet and yards is due to its original definition in furlongs/stades.

10 cables = 1 nautical mile

1 nautical mile ≈ 1.15 miles (mi)

A nautical mile was originally defined as one minute of latitude along any degree of longitude.

1 league (lea) = 3 miles (mi)

Area

Note the focus on farming; land was largely defined according to a farmer’s work.

1 perch = 1 square rod

1 rood = 1 furlong in length by one rod in width = 40 perches

1 acre = 43,560 square feet (sq ft) = 4,840 square yards (sq yd) = 4 rood = 1 furlong in length by one chain in width

An acre is traditionally defined as the area a farmer can reasonably plow in one day.

“Acre” is a Saxon word for “field.”

1 bovate = 15 acres

A bovate is traditionally defined as the area an ox can reasonably plow in one year.

1 virgate = 2 bovates = 30 acres

A virgate is traditionally defined as the area a pair of oxen can reasonably plow in one year.

1 carucate = 4 virgates = 8 bovates = 240 acres

A carucate is traditionally defined as the area an eight-oxen team can reasonably plow in one year.

like

I love coffee and I drink roughly two liters per day, so my friends bought me this massive liter-sized travel mug.  But I have a sensitive tongue and don’t like to sip my coffee, so I don’t like it hot.  But because my tongue is sensitive and I want to chug chug my mug mug, I don’t like it cold either.  So I leave my coffee out overnight so it’s lukewarm by the time I leave for uni in the morning.  I know this isn’t normal, but I love lukewarm coffee

but sometimes I forget that’s not normal

like once my friend was sleepy and thirsty so I offered her some of my coffee, and she loves coffee, especially the black coffee I make, so she grabs the mug from me all happy-like

then she took a sip and her face immediately turned to disgust and she started gagging, and everyone around looked at her, and i did too, wondering why she didn’t like my coffee

“WHY IS IT LUKEWARM?!?!?!” she screamed