Stellar Punctuation

they're literally so… like, the way their relationship has evolved just in the past couple weeks for tarvek. the last time they got into a physical fight with an audience, it was gil slamming tarvek into a wall and tarvek nearly getting shot for punching gil for accusing him of planning to spark-wasp agatha. now they can't spend five minutes having a normal conversation in front of another country's representative without deliberately getting into a play-fight just… to give themselves something to do with their hands while they talk?? to have an excuse to stay in maximum physical contact until the last possible second because they're going to have to be in separate rooms for a few minutes?? like literally why are they doing this. what is wrong with them. also the way the play-fight ends the instant tarvek actually does have to go, and tarvek checks that gil is going to be okay because tarvek is the one who's just been kidnapped at least twice, trapped in a stasis field, and nearly-fatally stabbed-and-poisoned, but gil is the one who needs to be worried about here because tarvek has already figured out which one of them is the cheetah and which one is the emotional support dog in this relationship

Klaus is running for their lives with the total supplies of one (1) sword and one (1) baby.

If we're feeling generous, they also have one (1) baby blanket. But only one. (Skifander may be warm, but caves - sorry, Jules Verne - are not.) He doesn't have anything to carry baby Gil in (or put baby Gil on) if he needs two hands for something. If he wants to take that torch with him, he's going to have to put the sword away. He doesn't have so much as a water bottle, much less a baby bottle. No supplies, no backup, no plan, no nothing. This man looks like he's lucky he's got shoes on.

That doesn't sound like the Klaus we know now.

And that tells me that whatever happened in Skifander, there was no warning. None. Zero. Not even a rumor. Klaus didn't have time to think about this. He didn't see it coming. He didn't have time to plan for it. He didn't have time to consider other options. He didn't even have ten seconds to throw baby stuff into a bag.

He just grabbed baby Gil - maybe the only baby in reach - and he ran.

I'm convinced he didn't mean to leave Skifander. I'm coming around to the idea that he might not have left baby Zeetha behind on purpose - he just didn't have a baby sling to hand.

No wonder this man is such an absolute control maniac. Emperor of Europa in all but name, and all because back in Skifander, he got blindsided by something he wasn't prepared for.

I imagine that this is the thing driving Klaus. This fear. This moment he had nothing, and he was the only thing keeping his son alive.

If that IS Doctor Vapnoople, his statement implies that he has been working on and sending out the Time Dragon backwards through time somehow - since it started appearing before he ever got his spark back, or ended up on the other side of the portal.

Fair enough! That place certainly exiats outside the normal flow of time.

But that means, doesn't it. That means the Dreen very much did NOT just want the very big gun from Klaus.

They needed him to do experiments on sparks over almost two decades, capture ans operate on Dimitri Vapnoople, making sure he is locked away in his own head for years, fueling his desperation and dedication, so he makes Krosp to lead his bears,

All so Krosp could take the bears from Marcellus, lead a raid on Castle Wulfenbach, liberating Dr. Dim, and taking him to England for sanctuary,

So he'd end up where the Cultists called their Vozzler, so Kjarl could fix Vapnoople's brain,

So he could end up on the other side of the portal, the most angry he's ever been,

So he could build the dragon,

So they'd have something to fight.

The ENTIRE POINT of Grace’s arc is that he is a Coward, with a capital C. He is a coward not only in his refusal of the Hail Mary mission, but in the way he lives his life before the Petrova Line was ever discovered. Grace has no close friends or coworkers, no pets or hobbies, no partners (short or long term), no family that we know of. His two main drives in life are (1) being a Cool Teacher to his students, and (2) nursing a grudge over getting kicked out of academia for proposing wild theories about life forms not based on water. As Stratt ACCURATELY points out, both of these things have large self-serving components. Grace genuinely loves his students and is good at teaching, but it’s at least partially because his classroom allows him to demand respect and attention without returning emotional vulnerability in the same way a peer relationship would. His academic theories were also largely motivated by a desire to be The Specialest Boy - and while Grace DOES prove himself very smart and capable, his pet theory wasn’t supported by his work with astrophage. Grace doesn’t jump at the chance to work with Stratt when she first approaches him, and he isn’t out there Living LIfe to the Fullest every day. He ADMITS to himself and to Stratt that he IS a coward, both for the way he’s lived up to PHM and for refusing to go on the mission when the timeline made it clear that there wasn’t enough time to bring another candidate up to speed and have the same odds of success. He straight up tells Stratt that he’ll sabotage Project Hail Mary if she tries to force him, DESPITE HIM KNOWING that Earth is headed for a literal apocalyptic Ice Age, and that everyone on the planet - including his beloved students!- has a pretty good chance of DYING if the mission doesn’t succeed! Stratt has to give him a coma cocktail that induces mild amnesia, and bet on him being at least good Enough (TM) not to kill the whole planet because he hated her for doing this to him.

(Also no hate for Eva Stratt, I love her and I will SUPPORT THIS WOMAN’S WRONGS until my dying day, she committed so many crimes and I cheered the whole way)

Despite Ryan Gosling’s very pretty Sad Boi eyes and sweaters, Ryland Grace is NOT a manic pixie dream scientist in love with Earth and its life and cultures. He just ISN’T. And if he WERE, then. Well. He certainly didn’t love Earth enough to fully embrace it while he was here, OR to volunteer to save it when he had the chance. This IS one of those situations where the distinction between “I love life” and “I don’t want to die” is a meaningful one. Does this make Grace a Cancelled Villain of All Time? No - it makes him a coward, but that doesn’t mean he inherently deserved to die. Does it ethically or morally justify forcing him onto a suicide mission while he fought and pleaded not to go? No! It makes Grace ORDINARY. Just some average fucking guy, not evil but not valiant, either. It’s like trying to claim Laika was the top search and rescue dog in the city when she got put into the pod. You don’t NEED to give Ryland Grace all these Tender Tragic Qualities of “loving Earth/Life” to have empathy for this poor dude who got launched into space.

In fact, Grace’s arc DEPENDS on him STARTING from that place of “I don’t really have a reason to be here” to “I have EVERY reason to turn my back on survival and do this act!” Grace wakes up on the Hail Mary, and has no context for why he’s on the ship but assumes that he was a Heroic Volunteer, like Yao and Ilyukhina. He sees their personal effects and Reasons Why They Volunteered, and keeps searching for his own Reason Why until he remembers that he didn’t HAVE a “reason why.” He was never a heroic volunteer. He comes to terms with the fact that he’s going to die, and IS. IN FACT. AS STRATT PREDICTED. A GOOD ENOUGH man to want to save the earth anyway rather than die alone without even trying to figure out the Petrova Problem out of spite. And he can do some pretty neat science along the way, which has always been one of his life motivations! At least he can do that before he dies, in the absence of anything else!

But the thing that Grace ACTUALLY loves enough to die for is ROCKY. The one in a million friend! Who saved his life and opened up his entire view of the universe! Grace’s core trait was NEVER “loving the Earth,” or “loving life.” The WHOLE FUCKING EARTH wasn’t enough to get Grace willingly onboard the Hail Mary! What made him turn the ship around was his GOTDAM SINGING ROCK FRIEND. The whole point is the change! Humanity’s capacity for massive apathetic cowardice and also astonishing bravery and hopefulness in connection. Andy Weir has his head in his ass about politics in his work, but you see?!?! You see, right!?!?!?!

@sagewiththyme You know that's a fascinating point because I figure the two options are a) no one really remembers what happened at the end because of magic bullshit or b) they play it off as a really elaborate but fully planned performance.

And the second one - can you fucking imagine.

Imagine one of the most popular bands in the world have this ongoing lore bit that they're actually demon hunters and they're always referencing it in their songs. And then one day a new boy band pops up and gets wildly popular with an over-the-top-cutesy hit. They're so soft and sweet and respectful. They're called Saja (Lion) Boys and they're all like "join the pride!" How cute!

And then they announce a new concert and you get there and it's fucking this. They're all dressed as demons/grim reapers. Surprise, "Saja" meant Jeoseung Saja all along! They're singing about how they're here for your soul and they relish in your pain, just a stunning 180 from their previous personas.

And then while you're trying to process the emotional whiplash the fucking demon hunter band bursts in and beats the shit out of them with the most insane pyrotechnic show you've ever seen in your life. They "kill" the boy band demons and then you never see them again. The whole band was a fucking psyop for Huntrix to play up the "demon hunters" bit.

Except, uhhhh. We didn't expect them to get so popular so fast? They For Sure weren't supposed to make it to the final round of the Idol Awards. Like, for Legal Reasons. We were almost visibly panicking on stage when they announced that! I mean, do you know how it would look once it eventually came out that Saja Boys were working for us? "Oh, you planted a fake band so you could win the competition!" No joke. I mean, that is a pret-ty clear conflict of interest there. You know?

The Idol Awards are all about the fan's choices, and we just accidentally rigged the game.

The Saja Boys had to win the Idol Awards, now, but there was no chance. They only had two songs, Soda Pop and Your Idol. We couldn't have them push up the debut--I mean, we thought about it, Your Idol's a banger song and it totally would've given us a run for our money--but we'd have to follow it up with This Is What It Sounds Like, first off, and second, 'killing' the Saja Boys onstage would be like. The Media equivalent of announcing we won, like the Fans didn't have a choice in the matter. At the Idol Awards? Ha. Yeah. That's a no-go.

And I mean. Soda Pop is catchy but not that catchy guys, c'mon. We were totally gonna cream them with Golden.

So we were all scrambling. Rumi and Mira and I were trying to write and choreograph a brand new song, Takedown, something good but not Good Enough To Win, to maybe prolong the Rivalry, you know? To make our comeback all the more sweet. But it was all such short notice, and the song wasn't working, and Huntrix never gives a shoddy performance, on principle. We couldn't do it. But it was looking like the only way we were gonna legitimately lose was if something... happened during the competition.

Like, obviously the Saja Boys weren’t a “real” band, so it makes sense they’re not coming out with new music, and since they’re “dead”, of course all their official band accounts have gone quiet, but like… someone would have had to be portraying the band members, right? Even if you wave that off as them being some of the same actors who portray the “demons” at their concerts, someone would definitely have to be lending their voices for the songs. Who were they? They couldn’t have been well-established in the industry, otherwise they’d have been recognized too quickly and the ruse would have been up, and something like this would have been a huge break for new performers.

So why’d they just disappear?

Where are the actors?