fire starter

End of story, Danny sues Superman and Lex Luthor for Child support.

Only Kon, Dani, and Tucker(who got all the documents ready) are enjoying this. Danny's sorta just chilling and going along with it, he doesn't really need Child Support, especially from two people, so he'll probably just put all the payments into funds for the kids' futures and give them more allowance(Kon insists Dani be given some of it too and Danny won't fight him on his decision).

Dick: *tugging Selina's sleeve*

Catwoman, startled: Jesus, kid, what the hell are you?

Dick, grinning and so proud he looks likes he's about to burst: I'm Robin.

Catwoman, confused as fuck: Ah...

Dick: Are you Batman's girlfriend?

Catwoman: Um

Dick: Because I met his other girlfriend the other night-

Catwoman: His what now?

Dick: I just want to say that she's not as cool as you. I mean she's a really pretty lady and she gave me a soda when I got up to get water but she's not a superhero like you.

Catwoman, vividly recalling her last date night at Bruce Wayne's Manor and Bruce's kid appearing behind her in the kitchen asking for water: Oh, you don't say. Tell me, where is your dad now?

Dick: *motioning behind him*

Catwoman: Why don't you tell him that I'm going to rob the Museum in five minutes? Tell him that it might he best if you headed home for that night.

Dick: Why?

Catwoman: Oh, Batman and I are going to have to... Um, talk this out. May take a while. Besides, you got school tomorrow, don't you?

Catwoman: And then he's all like, I can save you.

12 yo Jason, dragging a drag of a cigarette: Yeah, dumb 1-percenters.

Catwoman: See you get it.

Jason: I mean he's always on my back about putting Robin before my studies. Just because I'm from Crime Allwy doesn't mean I can't multi-task. Besides, it's 6th grade. So-

Catwoman: 6th Grade?

Jason:

Catwoman, yanking the cigarette out of his mouth that she totally gave him: Why can't that man make age appropriate friends?

Catwoman: Robin, you're too late. That diamond is-

Tim: Yeah, Batman's got it. No, what I want to address is your thievery of my Captain Crunch on your last booty call with my father.

Catwoman:

Tim: Oh, what? Cat got your tongue? It was the last bowl.

Catwoman: Batman, you motherfucker.

Bruce, literally chilling on a high rise: What?

Catwoman, gesturing to Steph who is holding her hand: The first female Robin and you make her feel like shit? What's the matter with you?

Bruce, hurt: Catwoman, baby, I-

Catwoman: She gets a new costume. She gets all the gadgets the boys got. And she gets to drive the Batmobile. And you know what will happen if any of these terms aren't met.

Bruce:

Bruce: Yes, dear.

Steph, later: You didn't have to go that hard, Selina.

Catwoman: Maybe but sometimes you have to keep men on their toes do they know the consequences of fucking with you. You have to remind them that you aren't a commodity or luxury or anything they can brush off. You are a person.

Steph: *nodding*

Catwoman: *admiring her new tennis bracelet*

Damian: I understand you are in a complicated sexual liason with my father from time to time but please understand this in no way entitles you to act in a mothering capacity.

Catwoman: Understood.

*enters kitten*

Damian, completely in love: Who is this alrajul alsaghir?

Catwoman: I haven't named him yet. Do you want to keep him? I have a lot of cats and they need a good home.

Damian, cuddling the kitten: We can be acquaintances.

Dick- Clark, aka his coparent during his Robin run

Cass- Selina because she's cool and almost as good (not really) as Cass at disappearing

Jason- Selina. He likes his cat mom

Tim- Harvey because he's a Bruce Wayne fanatic and would die for friends to enemies to lovers

Steph- Doesn't care. She thinks it would be funny if he fell for Clark though

Duke- Stuck between Selina and Talia because he's a poet and for stuck between the two lovers forced apart by circumstance, and the new love teaching a broken man to care again. He has written fanfiction about both of these things

Damian- Talia. Local child of divorce over here.

Selina: "Did Bruce have kids?"

Selina: "Chicken broth, that's not the sweat of the chicken, right?"

Selina: "Am I a notary?"

Selina: "I hit a robin. Not the person, the bird."

Selina: "What do I put for make of car? Metal?"

Selina: "Just found out the band Haulin' Oats is actually Hall & Oates."

Selina: "Do I put the bear spray on before I start hiking or just if I see a bear?"

Selina: "The cat threw up. I covered it with a napkin for you."

Selina: "When Bruce wakes up, can you tell him a tree fell on our house?"

Selina: "So when you do a hit and run... how does that work?"

Selina: "Please don't come to graduation. There won't be any other parents there."

Selina: "How does eating cold turkey help you quit smoking?"

Selina: "I don't care if the Chinese steal my data. We have unlimited."

And then Selina and Bruce start patching things up, and their relationship starts getting healthier, and Jason's sweating.

Selina: Before we move forward, I need you to know I have a son.

Bruce: A son? Since when?

Selina: Just let me know if it's too much for you

Bruce: ???

Bruce: I have seven children, of course it's alright

Selina: Ok good

-

The wedding is getting closer. Jason is going insane

-

Bruce: So this son of yours, when will I get to meet him?

Selina: He's very private, but I think you'll like him

Selina: His name is Jason

Bruce, solemn: I had a son named Jason. I wish you'd gotten to meet him. You would've loved him.

Selina: What was he like?

Bruce: He was a bleeding heart. He was my second Robin, but you've never met him out of uniform before.

Selina: I remember him! Do you have a picture? I might've met him in the alley.

Bruce: Of course

-Bruce pulls out his wallet, and shows her a picture-

She’s just so baby.