Show Me The Way To The Bar

i think every publisher should have to institute a ban on books that fail what i’m calling the “little life” and “what else?” tests

that was one of the gags in suit life of zach and cody when london had to babysit them and needed to figure out what a grilled cheese was.

I am an old bitch - 20/20.

@ominous-signs

Official ominous sign(s)

I would like to remind people that masculinity and gentleness are not opposites. They are not mutually exclusive. You can be very masculine and gentle at the same time. No one is more or less masculine for exhibiting kind, gentle behavior.

annoying when shows set in the medieval period have the women with thier hair just long and unstyled and out . girl go put on your wimple girl 🤦‍♀️

"Average canyon is full of arachnids" factoid actually just a statistical anomaly. Average canyon has a normal amount of arachnids. Spider Gorge-

average tumblr user only knows five jokes factoid actually just statistical error. Spiders Georg-

Item: Pigeon Shoes; a cheaper version of Flying Shoes that occasionally get distracted by bread crumbs

You know, when I've remarked that a lot of the responses to my posts feel like people are just plucking out keywords they think they recognise based on the shape of them and replying to what they imagine the post says based on that, the possibility never occurred to me that this is actually how many American schools are currently teaching kids to read.

Like, my assumption this whole time has been that when folks go "I misunderstood this post that says [thing] as saying [unrelated thing] because I mistook [word] for [completely different word that happens to start with the same letter]", that was a bit. What do you mean they're teaching kids a reading method that's tailored to produce this exact error?

You never know how signing up for a new class, getting a haircut, attending a party you are too lazy to go to, or applying to a job you think you have no chance at can really shift timelines. You are probably one decision away from catapulting into a new timeline.

Biggest fuck-up ever is that people have to pay to become doctors

Like unironically we should be subsidising at least 50% of their educations. What do you mean we have a shortage of doctors we should have surplus. What do you mean they’re being overworked they should be treated like royalty, they can fix human bodies

I don’t care if some of them are only doing it for the money. I don’t care if all of them are only doing it for the money. Intentions don’t matter to the stitches in my nana’s leg or the ten billion other lifesaving treatments we all get at a detriment to their finances and mental wellbeing. Entire cities are kept alive by just a couple thousand of them what are we DOINGGGGG

I want to see the vampire who lives in this. I bet his name is Chad or Hunter.

And he's ready to crack open a boy with the cold ones.

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek