Why are you here

I had some older games I was planning on checking out next, with this game at the time sitting in my wishlist as it had been for a bit, but an interesting video essay title for the game came across my dashboard, of all places, and the Steam Summer Sale happened, so I figured I'd snag it and play it so that I could enjoy the essay without spoiling a first time playthrough.

(shoutout to Spacelifeinc for prompting this, if you're reading this post, thank you, lol)

This game is very, very lovely to look at, whether we're talking about the traditional art interspaced here and there throughout important moments of the story (or pictures characters gift you)

Or about the actual space of the game itself, with the 3-D models full of fantastical elements.

From the start of the game it was very clear to me that Alita was dealing with a form of burnout, which I've mainly come across from people in artistic fields going through the same aspirations, same frustrations, and same lack of unintentional self-care as she was.

Dedicating your life to something, excelling at it, renowned for it, it becoming your entire identity, and then all of a sudden, seemingly out of nowhere, it all unravels and falls apart. Even the idea of picking up the tool of your craft suddenly is an overwhelming weight, one that feels impossible to overcome.

It's infuriating, why is something you've been able to do faultlessly a thousand times before suddenly just. not working?

It's horrifying, no matter what you do, you can't get your body to do something you were more than capable of accomplishing just the day before.

I find it really neat that Alta's identity revolves around swordfighting, rather than something more popularly viewed as creative. Everything surrounding that field is more associated as being aggressive, violent, more obviously gruelling and damaging. It's easier to see the harm Alita has been unknowingly doing to herself as an outsider; constant physically demanding training, never allowing herself a moments rest, not even to badk in the glow of an obvious achievement attained through her efforts, the victories in her fight competitions.

And when she falters, is defeated not just once, but multiple, consecutive times, rather than acknowledging the strain her regimen must've caused, she endeavors to push herself even harder. Rather than acknowledge that she has limits, that she needs to take a break and reflect, slow down, she views her defeats as signs that she had gotten sloppy, lazy.

It's incredibly distressing to watch as the player, being given the choice between "taking a moment to rest" and to "keep going," actively trying repeatedly to have her stop, just for a moment, just to breath, only for her to ignore both you and her very own body that has begging for her to stop, before she physically can't push herself any further.

This all gets further reflected in the work Alita takes up in the tea shop, with each visiting character seemingly representing an aspect of what Alita is going through.

And a story that seemed so obviously about burnout, possibly disability as well and not overcoming it or accepting it per say but evolving as a person with it, becomes more complex with the reveal of the source of Alta's current issue; someone desperately needing a change while also feeling both afraid and incapable of it.

The mechanics revolving around all the little chores for the tea shop are pretty nice, too! I like how varied the flora is, how much focus is put into making different combinations of things, starting from the plants growing the seeds needed for the plants growing the fruits needed for the different flavors of magical teas.

I like how there are combinations that aren't in the field guide you're given, recipes that have unique properties.

I like how flexible the definition of "tea" is!

A customer who's never had tea before asks for the flavor of books? Sure just chuck in a book. Alta might not be able to distinguish any difference but the customer sure was able to get something out of it based off whatever book you threw in there.

Just so silly and whimsical.

I did enjoy my time with it. I don't think I'll ever return to it, personally, but it was a nice experience, and a pretty neat little game.