Wisdom And Whimsy

Q: Good afternoon, Vox, and thanks for your interest in my interview series. Maybe it’s just because I’m a fan of Hazbin Hotel. Maybe it’s because I also identify as fictionkin AND divinekin. I just know that I jumped at the chance to interview you.

So, you’re Vox, and you’re also a god. God Himself, you have even said. Can you better describe yourself and your kintype for me? 

A: Good afternoon, really the pleasure is all mine. I find discussing my life and experiences - both past and present -quite cathartic and well, let's be real, who doesn't like talking about themselves?

For starters, I consider Vox my “main” kintype because it classifies as a permanent shift, i.e., I go about this world with the thoughts, feelings, perspectives, and mentality that I did as the famous T.V. Overlord, in addition to those developed in this life, of course. The identity falls under the “spiritual” fictionkin category, which is always a bit funny to say because I am far from a spiritual man. My Godhood, on the other hand? A bit more of a complicated one.

Q: Divinity is always complicated. Fun, yes. Does it feed the ego? Oh, hell yes. But we're difficult to understand, even and especially to ourselves. What's perhaps even harder is figuring out why we're here. So, why do you think you ended up here? Why did you incarnate on earth?

A: You can say that again - but complicated and fun have always been a part of my natural state of being, so I don't trip over my feet trying to meticulously define and label every single aspect of myself. As I so eloquently put it once, "I'm fucking God!" -there are no ifs, ands, or buts about it. As far as why I ended up here, I have a few different thoughts on the matter, and they can be totally contradictory depending on the day or my mood. Sometimes I think it’s pure happenstance, completely random. But I also firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. I can think of a few things I desired in my past life but didn't quite achieve - perhaps I’ve been given a chance to rectify that here. 

Q: I think our theories changing based on our mood or daily events is a common experience. It certainly is for me. What do you think is the root cause of the fictionkin phenomenon? My theory is a spiritual one - that powerful beings inserted themselves into this universe to be known, to be acknowledged. I’d love to hear your take on the matter.

A: I’ve gotta hand it to you, that’s an interesting take, and it’d align with folks of our specific flavor: those of us who thrive on fame, glory, and/or power over others. I’ve no doubt that the content of our souls informs which - well - form we take on at each and every go, but I don’t believe it to be a fully conscious choice. I’ll tell you this, the desire and, at times, overwhelming need for power still burns strong within me, but it isn’t a driving force for me here. Not this time around. 

Q: If we gods didn't temper our desire for power we'd fall into madness, and nothing is worse than a mad god. I can't imagine what we'd do if power made us desperate. I guess that leads into my next question in a way - How do your kintypes’ lives and experiences influence your current one, if at all?

A: I’ve had my taste of madness before - of throwing caution to the wind, consequences be damned. It’s not exactly an experience I’d care to repeat, not so much for others’ sake, but for my own. Oh my past life and experiences most definitely influence my current, as I believe they’ll continue doing so for time immemorial with each life I lead. The lessons I learned back then, the memories, the pleasure, the pain - a lot of it has stuck with me and has helped keep me from repeating past…missteps, shall we say, in the here and now. It also affects how I see the world, how I see other people, how I interact with them, the kinds of relationships I seek, even. 

Q: The thing about eternity is that we have forever to learn from our mistakes and move on. I hope this life can provide some insight. Sometimes you have to step back to really see the big picture, and I can’t see a better place to do that than earth. We’re taken from our homes, taken from our bodies… we’re forced to see things through another perspective. So, have you ever faced discrimination or have been bullied for being kin?

A: Very well said - leave it to a God to dish out some wise words. With each new life comes new opportunities, and I fully intend to make the most of it while I’m here. As far as discrimination or bullying goes, no, I haven’t experienced any directly. While I’m sure most of us have run into anti-kin content or blogs, I choose to simply block them and move on with my life. 

Q: Luckily Tumblr seems to be a safer community for kin than, say, Tiktok. I haven’t had to deal with much hatred, either, despite being rather outspoken. There’s more than just antikin for you to reckon with, however. How does the fandom respond to you? Has it been a warm welcome?

A: Oh, it absolutely depends on the platform. There are places I avoid openly discussing these aspects of my identity because I know that’d only draw in trolls and anti-kin rhetoric. When it comes to interacting with fandom at large, that’s another place I tread carefully - I’ll reblog fanart, memes, and text posts, but I don’t tag them as “’kin” or reblog and add comments relating to my fictionkinity. I can easily engage with fans as a fellow fan, discuss the show, the music, the theories, etc. etc., and that’s all well and good. If and only if I see they are receptive and support those who are alterhuman/otherkin/fictionkin will I consider discussing that with them. It’s not a matter of being ashamed of this aspect of myself, but we have to protect our peace first and foremost, and often times that means being picky-choosy about who we open up to. Luckily, I haven't had any negative experiences on that front thus far. 

Q: That’s definitely wisdom the younger members of this community could use - we need to protect ourselves. Yes, the world at large should accept us - embrace us, even. Unfortunately, we often fall victim to bullying, if not worse. I hope that in the future you’ll be able to speak freely with fans of the show and fans of you, in particular!

So, I hate to say it, but I think our interview is coming to a close. Before I go - what do you want the community to know about you? Is there anything you want to say that we haven’t had the chance to cover? Who is Vox, exactly?

A: All good things must come to an end, as the saying goes. It's been a neat opportunity participating in this interview. To leave the audience with one last note - a behind the scenes peek at who Vox truly is: I am man, sinner, demon, God - even now - but I am also a friend, a brother, a student, an artist, a fan. This life of mine is vastly different from the one I led before, but I am no less me. And I very much enjoy engaging with others in the alterhuman community, so don't be shy and swing on by anytime for a chat with the God of entertainment himself. 

Q: First off, I just wanted to say thank you for agreeing to be part of this interview. I was over the moon when I realized Freddy Krueger himself wanted to talk to me. So, tell me - what does it mean to be Frederick Charles Krueger? Who and what are you?

A: Of course! To sum it up it just means I get to be unapologetically myself. I don’t have to answer to anyone but myself. I’ve been many things throughout my lifetime. In my human life I was the Springwood Slasher, a serial child killer who terrorized Springwood, Ohio. On the surface I played the part of the all American family man with a wife and daughter. My marriage ended and my daughter was taken from me when I was caught. I was able to escape the law on some technicality. The parents formed a mob, tracked me down, and burned me to death. Through my rage and desire for revenge three demons approached me, through them I was given the power to invade dreams, thus beginning my life as a dream demon. Looking back at the time I was caught I was anxious sure, but it was the first time I could actually be who I was. Who I am made me powerful enough to survive the grave. Even though I am a mortal once again, I still see myself as a dream demon. Even if I have no desire to kill, the macabre, taboo are deeply ingrained in me. I still have a fascination with fear, so I love to express it with art. All in all passion, rage, and resilience is what makes me whole. 

Q: It’s good to hear that you’ve found a way to be yourself and express yourself through art, and I’m glad you’re choosing creation rather than destruction… as the human incarnation of a so-called evil being myself, I know how hard that can be. So, when did you realize you weren’t human? What was that process of self-discovery like?

A: My relationship with humanity is kind of complicated, often a lot of demons talk about having nonhuman instincts and drives. Because I am a human who became a demon I have very human traits, my demonic traits are more in my appearance and supernatural abilities. I think my non humanity is something I connect with my neurodivergence. Since I was a kid I’ve felt separate from people, like something emulating a human, not being neurotypical makes me less likely to adhere to social norms. I’ve always wanted to do what I wanted to do. How I feel about myself now reminds me a lot of myself in my source.

Q: I think a lot of us can relate to their neurodivergence causing a rift between us and the people around us. It's good that you seem to love and accept yourself - and I’m sure there's a lot of euphoria knowing that who you are now is who you are in your source. Do you have a lot of memories from that life?

A: I sadly don’t have a lot of memories, I wish I could have more. I tend to have ones centered around my family, and in general it’s very bittersweet, or melancholic. Besides my daughter’s birthday I saw the three of us walking to our car in front of an apartment complex, not sure why we were there, but we looked happy. I don’t know anything about cars, but the car in my dream ended up being a late 60’s model, which was kinda weird. I started doing meditation to try and “trigger” memories I haven’t really been successful, however I did have a vague one where I was sitting in the court room during my trial, I felt very on edge, and it definitely was anxiety inducing. I hope to one day see more of my life I especially want to remember how I became a dream demon and what that process was like, not to mention living in the dream world. 

Q: I know how frustrating it is to only have glimmers of your past life. It’s like… your past is a puzzle, and you don’t have all the pieces. Moving on - what was it like when you discovered the alterhuman community? Were you happy to find a community of like-minded individuals? Did you worry that you were going to be rejected?

A: When I was first introduced to fictionkin, to be honest I thought it was kind of ridiculous, but I’ve come a long way since then. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, the more I spent observing the otherkin and fictionkin community I realized that it fit how I felt internally. I had a lot of internalized shame that I needed to work through. If anything the strongest emotion I felt was relief, because I found somewhere I can be more openly myself. That means a lot especially if you’re a canonically evil character, because fandom isn’t really the place to discuss complex identities. Often society isn’t very open to identifying in a way that’s different than what you physically are, so I didn’t feel like I could talk openly about my alterfictional experiences. 

Q: I think a lot of us have those reservations at first. We may even outright reject labeling ourselves as part of the alter/nonhuman community, to “other” ourselves from them - I certainly did. I think I was afraid of becoming part of this community because that would mean admitting to myself that I was something most people will never understand. And of course society conditions us to see alterhumanity as “playing pretend,” unfortunately. There’s a lot of work that needs to be done in the soul, layers to peel off. So, how do you feel about your depiction in Nightmare on Elm Street and its sequels?

(Freddy expands upon previous question before continuing)

A: Besides my physical disabilities my autism definitely makes me feel “other”. There’s always a conflict between wanting to be yourself, but also feeling isolated because a lot of people don’t or refuse to understand. My journey into religious satanism kind of reminds me of this, it’s a choice that a lot won’t understand, but it’s given me the push to live my life for me and embrace my individuality. Being fictionkin isn’t a choice, it’s the decision of pursuing unapologetic self acceptance or repression that’s similar.

A: To finally answer your question! I feel like my experience diverges from the community at large; for the most part I’m fine with my canon. Watching the films and learning about lore from the franchise was an important part of my self discovery. Something that’s important to point out is that my awakening began before knowing any lore about myself, and the more I learned it just began to “click” . A lot of people are particular about how they’re portrayed in fan work, with me though I don’t have a lot of strong feelings about it. I kind of chalk it up to being a dream demon, demons are quite fluid in their presentation depending on the goal of the interaction. The fandom does poke fun at me for being this insecure “alpha male” type, but I do wish that my ability to play with gender and social dynamics was recognized more. I do enjoy reading fanfic or seeing fan art; I find it really entertaining. 

Q: I hear you there. Tumblr in particular enjoys pairing me and my archnemesis for funsies, but being a collector of comic books featuring the character, I can’t say the pairing is that far off from the truth. I think it’s all in good fun, and it’s good to know you do, too. So, what do people in “real life” think about you and your kintype? Does anyone offline know who you are, or do you have to exist behind closed doors?

A: Actually my family knows about my identity and they’re pretty accepting of it, which I feel incredibly privileged. It did take some conversations to help them understand that it’s nothing to be concerned about. I wrote an essay about my journey, which seemed to help them understand where I’m coming from. Although I kind of wish that there was more of an understanding that identifying as a character isn’t the same as being a fan. In my case it looks identical because I do collect merch. Merch is more of an expression of my internal identity rather than admiring something separate from myself. 

Q: Our community is difficult to understand by the people who aren’t in it. I think certain doors are closed in peoples’ minds, you know? Like, there’s this part of ourselves that’s open in childhood, a part that understands these concepts easily. And then one day most people close that door. You have no idea how relieving it is to hear that you’re loved and accepted by your family, even if they don’t exactly understand. But what about outside your family? Have you ever been bullied for being kin, either online or offline? What happened?

A: I haven’t been bullied but I have had negative comments on my posts before. Interestingly I don’t get much hate (not that I want that!). It was mostly when I first started my blog. I’m also cautious about how much I share about myself in certain spaces of the internet. I’m not open about being fictionkin in any fandom spaces outside of tumblr. I find that my relationship to a Nightmare on Elm Street feels very different than a lot of other people. A lot of fans relate to the protagonists, and the themes of the films. Freddy is very much seen as a “bad guy” , so the fans generally don’t really relate or see themselves in him. It’s hard to summarize it’s just a vibe that it’s not a community that I feel comfortable to share my identity in, because I don’t think they’ll understand. I think it will be misinterpreted as idolizing. 

Q: As a fellow villain - and a god of duality and madness! - I understand the reticence to talk about yourself or share too much about yourself. Even here on Tumblr you have to tread carefully at times. Sometimes our kintypes are problematic. Sometimes we do horrible things in our source material - things that we would never do in this life. Beings change. I certainly did. So, what advice would you give someone who’s just figuring out that they’re fictionkin?

A: The main advice I’d give is to take your time, you don’t have to figure everything out. I often see folks worry about not being able to tell if a character is a kintype or if they just really like a character, for that I’d say just try it out. It’s ok to change your mind later. 

Q: Words of wisdom - the process of self-discovery is a long one. It’s best to keep trying, and don’t be afraid to make mistakes. So, we’re nearing the end of the interview here. Before I finish up, I want to add that Nightmare on Elm Street is the first horror movie I ever watched. Thanks for scaring the living daylights out of me and for instilling in me a lifelong love of the horror genre.

So, finally, is there anything else you want to say? What do you want us to know about you?

A:  I’m flattered to hear that I got you into horror! I can’t really think of anything else right now, other than I love talking about myself, so my inbox is always open. I’m glad that I got to take part in this!