Fruit (Derogatory)

was lamenting the fact that my eczema is flaring up when the thought "the itcher" popped into my head fully formed and unprompted and now i can't stop laughing

You vibe as someone prone to toxic relationships

People on tumblr will just say anything huh.

Oh cmon, "he hurt me a lot cause i couldn't let go" absolutely has double interpretation.

Me, holding a cat (of unknown gender) as it repeatedly digs its little teeth deep into my flesh: Is this… too… yuri?

This website is free

We pay in other ways.

tiktok is such an awful app, it's almost designed to feed you misinformation and expose you to insane discourse. unlike beloved tumblr, the app that feeds me misinformation and exposes me to insane discourse

No, no, no, you see on tiktok an algorithm feeds you misinformation. On Tumblr I feed myself misinformation from my charcuterie board of hand-selected unhinged mutuals.

None of that mass market junk. Only artisanal, small batch, sustainably cultivated, fair trade horseshit.

Reblogging this on ALL my blogs because holy shit is it useful

I just wanna thank the person who put this across my dash cause I’m sad as hell but I still laughed a little

WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY

A chorus of the brightest little ‘Wow!’s you could ever imagine.

Neil Banged out his tunes today, on a train you have the comfort and relaxation to bang out your own tunes

I was born at a very young age.  I’ve been alive for as long as i can remember, and I hope to continue living until I die.

And what do you think you can bring to our company?

Gonna steal from it

it really is insane how waking up early will grant you access to some of the most beautiful sights and sensations in the world that will make you want to live forever, but only if you overcome the gauntlet of a thousand razors that is getting out of bed early. truly one of life's little saw traps.

there should be a hotline for me to call autistic people with specific hyperfixations every time i have a question

seen a person’s blog that had “porn bot” under the do not follow if criteria………king they can’t read💔

[ID: a sad ant with a bindle, presumably originally from an ad for pest control.]

posts where the ID makes the joke funnier

it is once again, despite everything, sad ant with a bindle monday

if you try to run me through with your blade i'll just pull it in deeper until we're face to face and kiss you on the mouth. with tongue.

and yes. i will vomit blood into your mouth <3