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@anna-vs-diy
Hello there! Long time, no post. Quarantine has been a weird thing. Sometimes you drink Moutain Dew at 9 pm and start tiling your bathroom by 11 🤷‍♀️ this is as far as I got because I don’t have a tile saw and I didn’t feel like doing anymore (albeit minimal) math. Enjoy!
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Easy Trash Furniture Reupholstery
Step 1: Let a cat scratch up your keyboard bench then forget it outside for weeks.
Step 2: Get some fabric. Pastels & floral are strongly suggested.
Step 3: Have a shiney staple gun
Step 4: Flip bench upside down on fabric
Step 5: Fold fabric over the edge of the stool.
Step 6: Get fancy folding the corners. Make a gif to show the world
Step 7: Say “Wow” and pat yourself on the back.
How to make space without having to buy shit to make space.
I got tired of my patio furniture cushions sitting on the floor. Even though it’s for outside furniture I still don’t want it to be ***dirty*** Step 1) get a rope Step 2) screw that rope into the wall. Step 3) hang your shit on it.
Sometimes you have a loft bed that goes on top of you desk & you put it back on top your desk & turn it into a secret hangout lounge/reading nook but mostly you’re trying to do something with all these effing throw pillows that don’t match shit.
How to fix gauges in your floor so you can stop getting splinters indoors: Step 1: pick up some Elmer’s Glue wood repair system Step 2: Acknowledge that the directions are both is English, picture, and Spanish Step 3: (not pictured) hope that anyone who speaks any other language is able to repair their floors too Step 4: Realize that this shit looks like ice cream Step 5: Make sure it’s not ice cream Step 6: it’s not. Step 7: Find a victim Step 8: Tape off victim like a crime scene Step 9: Make a snake. B*tches love snakes. Step 10: Squish the snake...into the gauge on the floor Step 11: Smoot with putty knife Step 12: Post blog while waiting for it to dry.
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Let’s enjoy this series of bathroom transformations, modeled by the prettiest boys out there (Jake and BOOFEY)
***Is it art, a drinking problem or both? How to make boozey shelves! *** Who’s ready for some snow day crafts that make possible alcoholism look like a Pinterest board?! I know I am! *Step 1* Drink a lot then spray paint some of those bottles white for ~class~ *Step 2* Find some reclaimed wood. If you don’t have any for steal...I mean, “reclaim” from someone else. Rinse it off in your shower that has no water pressure because it is TOO DANG COLD OUT. *Step 3* Prepare to drill 2 holes, one on each end of the board. This is where your wine bottles, which will work as anchors & balances (but mostly decorative nonsense) will go. *Step 4* Place wine bottles through the holes you drilled. It doesn’t really matter if they’re straight. Anyone who is going to notice is probably an ass anyways. *Step 5* use old know & tube wiring that you pulled from your attic and for whatever reason did not throw away as your hanging mechanism for your shelf. *Step 6* Put your classiest decorations on the shelf. Mine happen to be regret and more empty bottles of booze. *Step 7* Do everyone a favor and stick some dried flowers at the end.
***How to not freeze to death this winter*** In addition to doing some obvious things (sealing windows with plastic, and closing off rooms to trap heat) JUST CAULK IT! Big ole gap by the front door? Just caulk it! Old wood window frames shootin’ out cold air? Just caulk it! Holes in the floor from old wires or something? Go ahead and caulk it. Cold air seeping up through the baseboards? Effin’ right. Caulk it. But what about gaps so big caulk won’t work? Cram some insulation up in that shiz and then caulk it! Or drywall it...dry wall is a good idea too. Tomorrow I embark on adding some sweet insulation to the crawl space. So that all this caulk doesn’t go in vain. Until then! DIY it up, y’all.
The Importance of Femme DIY and Home Renovation
I would say I’m lucky.Â
When I was in middle school, I had found a bunch of old plywood and 2x4′s in the woods behind our house. I stole my dad’s hammer and some galvanized nails from his tool bin and attempted to build a tree house. I was held together by crooked nails and too many of them at that. When I had asked him to buy me a hammer and tools, his initial response was no...and then I guess when he realized I was going to do it anyways, he bought me a box of nails and a lightweight hammer (because being a less than 100 lb 6th grader, I was not swinging a full size hammer).Â
My dad made sure I also knew the basics or car care, I’ve changed bellows boots, brakes, spark plugs, etc. II’ve changed tires in the most inconvenient of circumstances without issue. In general, I know my tools, the difference between a philips and flathead (straight slot) screwdriver...these things are basic knowledge to me. When I don’t know how to do something, I google it.Â
I furthered my ability of general tool usage by going through the VCU Sculpture program. I know how to weld, I can use a table saw, clamps are a girls best friend, and you better check me on my beveled edges because they are sharp. Nothing makes me more excited than getting Harbor Freight coupons.Â
So, I’ve posted 2 images that have really inundated my brain in terms of society’s perception on women and DIY. I can’t say either image is surprising. The first one: a high heeled shoe and a butter knife (i.e. a hammer and screwdriver). When I was younger, this image used to make me so mad, but honestly, I have to look at it as something more empowering.Â
I mean, have ya’ll SEEN what I can do in heels and with a butterknife? Amazing things, that’s what. Women are creative and innovative. Honestly, we don’t need a standard tool set, we can in fact fix shit with a high heel and a butterknife. But every time we pick up a hammer or screwdriver, or jigsaw, in little tiny ways, we’re breaking through “gender norms” (which are stupid to begin with, I mean, every man I know cooks 1000x better than I do and I’m not even sorry about that).Â
So, back to the blog title, “The Importance of Femme DIY and Home Renovation”. Why do I personally think this is important? Is it because it defies expectations? Is it because when something goes wrong in my house, the first few people I call happen to be men?Â
Well, its a little bit of all of the above. I think in many ways, women’s abilities to fix things has been undermined and discouraged. I’ve seen enough things that say “You can build her a house but she’ll make it a home”. Yeah, no, I’m going to go ahead and just do both, thank you very much, quite simply because I can. And really, that’s the basis of it all. I can and I will.Â
Shoutout to all my femmes out there doing the dang thing. We know how often people doubt our abilities and knowledge of fixing things and getting the job done but also shoutout to all those who believe in us and encourage us.Â
My new years resolution for all my femmes out there is to learn how to use a new power tool.Â
Side note: the pink tool set, I’d probz actually use that because I lose my tools all the time and you can see that pink from space.Â
The Porch Saga
Its no surprise when I say my house is falling apart. In fact, I think that statement is common knowledge at this point...but when your porch is so rotted out it starts growing plants, its only a matter of time before it collapses.Â
The issue had been that water was pooling in the corner of the roof. Because of the type of roof at has, there are no gutters and the drain was actually HIGHER than the level at which water was pooling. That water then started seeping into the roof and house.Â
Now, while I have torn a good portion of my home apart, I know my limits.Â
Anyways, long story short. I hired a contractor who has been nothing short of amazing! I had met Paul Keller http://www.paulkellerdesigns.com/Â when I first moved into my house and after multiple contractors failed to call me back or gave me outrageous quotes, Paul and his team pulled through. It was only a matter of 2.5 days and they tore down and completely rebuilt the porch and my GOD is it beautiful. Like, my house looks way less embarrassing...at least from the outside.Â
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ALAS! The crown moulding is done! Nothing like being too scared to sleep to get some actual work done :)
Should I rip out these door jambs or naw?
How to trick people into thinking you’re classy and cultured. 1) Get some damn throw pillows. Don’t even worry if they match. The more useless they are, the better. 2) Leave your Roomba running at all times-when people trip over it just comment “Haha oh! Don’t mind my vacuum cleaning robot-she’s just making my life easier” even though you know damn well it isn’t picking up any dirt because you have cleaned out the trap in ages. 3) Put a table cloth and cushions on the patio furniture you won’t be using because it’s November and everything has iced over. 4) Leave an air filter out-make it look like it’s something you actually think about changing and cleaning even though you don’t. 5) Evidence you recycle-so environmental conscious! 6) A coffee pot-not a Keurig you uncultured swine! (I actually love keurigs) 7) A fridge calendar with all the events you will not be attending. 8) House plants that you brought in last night so they didn’t freeze last night 9) A coat rack-doesn’t matter that it’s actually in the shape of a ram skull. 10) Dried flowers in an empty liquor bottle that you didn’t bother rinsing. It distracts from to diet.
Most women need more room for their clothes or shoes...I need more room for my tools. Organizing my toolbox & "work bench" today was really satisfying. Harbor Freight will be the death of me though. I'd also like to point out that the flowery little candle tin is actually full of random screws and nails. Just saying.
<p>I get my sense of humor from my dad in case y'all are wondering.
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Cool Finds and Janky Joists-A day in the life of 'Anna Renovates the Bathroom'-a project gone on a year too long-A Memoir Anyways, found some old broken jars (that are green glass so that's exciting!), a 1934 Windsor Straight Whisky Bourbon bottle and and old jar that most likely contained olives. They were all stuffed under the floor of the bathroom. Today's mission was removing the plywood to get to the underneath the floor so that I could reroute in the bathroom. And it's totally a mess and totally not structurally sound and will 100% not hold a cast iron bathtub. 🤷‍♀️
A haiku about my house
It has not fallen down This is a surprise to many Myself included