This is genuinely one of my favourite videos on the fucking planet.

#extradirty
Cosmic Funnies
wallacepolsom
Peter Solarz

η₯ζ₯ / Permanent Vacation

JVL
styofa doing anything

shark vs the universe

PR's Tumblrdome

@theartofmadeline
Three Goblin Art
Not today Justin
occasionally subtle

Origami Around

oozey mess
Xuebing Du

if i look back, i am lost
Show & Tell

romaβ

β

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seen from TΓΌrkiye
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@anilover10
This is genuinely one of my favourite videos on the fucking planet.

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My mom likes to tell me about how when I was a little kid riding public transport with her I'd always smile and giggle and chat with weird old ladies who smelled like cat pee and homeless folks and strangers dressed in bizarre outfits but any time a tidy and respectable businessman in a suit and tie waved at me I'd immediately clam up, and she takes a great deal of pride in my supposed inherentability to clock personalities but the truth is I do vaguely remember those bus rides, and it was never about the clothes or the hair or the smell, but more because everyone "strange" asked interesting questions and listened to what I had to say and seemed to think about what I said while the neat and tidy and rigid folks only ever acted like they were going through the motions, which was boring as hell and also pretty annoying
Well-to-do finance manager with tidy shoes: "Why hello, sweetheart. Can you say 'hi'? Aren't you cute. Are you on a trip with your mom?"
4 year old me: why must we do this
Fantastic old woman in the leopard print coat: "Why yes, my tooth IS real silver! Nobody ever asks me that. Do you like cats?"
4 year old me, suddenly paying attention: Finally, A Person Of Intellect
Sometimes you hear a song and a fic pops into your head full formed. This is a trap. The fic may be fully formed in your brain, but you still Have to write it down. This is an important step that most people forget about.
Communication is key
Hey, pervert question: sex Today
Yoo who got the american woodcock on their island

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apartment. iβm at my apartment
I heard another video game is coming out soon
this has to stop
Panacea (All Might x Reader)
A panacea (/ΛpΓ¦n.ΙΛsiΛ.Ι/) is a solution or remedy that is claimed or believed to cure all diseases and solve all difficulties. The term translates essentially to a cure-all.
Summary: Born with a target on your back, you possess Panacea, a powerful healing quirk. Your blood restores any external injury, while your saliva can reverse internal damage and disease. To protect your quirk from All For One, who hunts relentlessly for your abilities, you've been in hiding for fifteen years.
But when the Symbol of Peace, All Might, suffers a devastating injury that threatens the stability of Hero Society, you are summoned back to U.A. High School as his personal physician.
Warnings: Mention of vomit.
SERIES MASTERLIST
"turn the radio off, fran, the vault tec guy's at the door!"
my sole survivors jason & francine πβ’ reference by coby whitmore

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https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cwydx34kzlvo
"Vanderhorst had been under the influence of MDMA and three litres of vodka she had consumed on the night of the offence last September, her lawyer Michael Hill told the court."
three. liters.
i support women's wrongs
the best fanfiction you've ever read was written by a woman in her 40s before she made dinner for her kids. it was written by a teenager after school when they should've been studying for a history test. and a barista came up with the idea while they cleaned the espresso machine and busser fact-checked it on their break and the post-doc edited between writing grant proposals and the nurse apologized for typos in the notes after a long shift and behind every drabble and one-shot and multi-chapter fic there is a person with a wonderful and interesting and chaotic life and it is such a privilege that we get to be apart of it because they decided to do this thing we all share, for fun.
Because I'm a biologist and a complete freak, I sometimes amuse myself thinking about like a super ultra advanced alien race that 'conquers' our planet, but instead of being all 'War of the Worlds' about it, they aren't even conquering, as far as they're concerned. There are no inteligent life forms on this planet, after all, just little animals, and they're clearly on the endangered species list. A perfect place to study rare wildlife on an untouched planet.
So there's an alien research station in space. Humanity's worst attempts to destroy it amount to a bear turning over the trash can. Aliens occasionally abduct people and return them with a clean bill of health and an ankle bracelet. It takes them forever to figure out those bracelets are screwing with their data because humans who carry them are curve-wreckingly popular.
Disaster strikes somewhere, I dunno, Japan, and there's an uptick in abductions, but of people stuck in collapsed buildings, and yeah the giant octopus tree that looks straight out of Call of Cthulhu is scary but it's also using tech you can't even comprehend to find survivors and teleport them out of the rubble. You see humans with absolutely 100% deadly injuries wisked away and a good number of them even return. There is now a new consent form specifying if rescuers can take you to the aliens, because they will probably try to save you but if they can't your family will never get your body back. You decide if your life or your body is more important.
Little by little, pragmatism wins out. The aliens aren't attacking, but they ARE abducting and doing weird tests. But the survivors mostly return unharmed with a Big Mac in hand and a weird piece of tech. There have been less valid excuses to miss school. The aliens are clearly researching humanity just as much as we are researching them, and until communications are established this status quo isn't the worst.
Ofc, then one of them actually attacks. Knocks the statue of liberty clean off. The military starts to deploy fast, and even wounds the attacker a lot, but before they can shoot the second missle it bounces. And it turns on the shooter. Every military person in the attack dies, suddenly and through means you cannot comprehend. The other aliens whisk the attacking one away. Construction materials appear as if in apology, but that's it.
The attacker was a hooligan who thought destroying wildlife was fun, and ran into something they can't handle. But even if the bear is perfectly within its rights to defend its territory, the ranger will atill have to shoot it to save the stupid brat, and hope the idiot learned their lesson.
But the bear is still dead. And the forest critters who had just started getting used to the ranger are now having second thoughts.
But the abductions continue. There are no hooligans for a while. And what else can you do? This is your home, but if the invaders really want to take it, what can you do?
So you try to stay out of their way, if you are in some serious trouble and your chances are already less than 50/50, maybe you seek them out. Sometimes they help. Sometimes they don't.
And sometimes the abductees catch glimpses of something that looks like it might have been human once, but eyes and skin all wrong, speaking incomprehensibly, and rubbing its head on the alien's 'knees'.
You go home to your dog and try not to think about it.
we're heading towards some record setting humidity this summer so JUST A REMINDER that if you're in any way prone to migraines, this weather is great at triggering them! Be EXTREMELY diligent about staying hydrated if you're going out, EVEN TO AN AIR CONDITIONED SPACE, and ESPECIALLY if you are drinking any alcohol at all! even a single glass of wine or a cocktail! You will feel fine for an hour or two but then you will NOT FEEL FINE. If you have a headache that isn't responding to painkillers and it gets noticeably worse when you move or change elevations (sitting to standing, not like, going to the mountains) then drink a full glass of water and go lie down in a cool, quiet, dark room until it passes! DO NOT LOOK AT A SCREEN UNTIL THE DANGER HAS PASSED. I know you're bored but it could be so much worse!
I see this is going around again! Happy Migraine Season everybody! Remember to keep a damp washcloth in your freezer so that if you feel the migraine coming on you can lay down and press it against your forehead and temples to give yourself a better chance of ducking it before it's too late!
Also a reminder that for some folks, big changes in air pressure can also be a migraine trigger. So if youβre in an area that, like mine, is having a lot of really wild temperature swings (ie multiple very hot days that end abruptly with storms at which point it cools down a lot), might be a good idea to have your migraine remedies locked and loaded, because with migraines the sooner you intervene, the more likely it is youβll avert the worst symptoms (and will need less medication to do so).
Also a reminder that water is not always enough for keeping hydrated. You need electrolytes. It doesn't have to be a fancy 10$/β¬ drink. Just dilute some juice with water and add a bit of salt and sugar (1tsp salt, 6-8tsp sugar per litre of water*).
*don't forget to balance if you're diabetic, might also want to consult if you suffer from any kidney disease
tuesday is the second day of the week and it kind of sounds like the word two and that's really awesome to me but nobody ever talks about it

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I need y'all to get WAY more suspicious about cute animal photos and videos on tumblr, so often I see cat pictures that are AI upon closer inspection :/
Tell-tale sign I've noticed: comments are completely disabled with zero comments, OR there are a bunch of people calling out it's AI.