..it's all a big publicity stunt..
..found out she's probably sleeping with his Dad.. she's out here off the rails again..
..you're falling off the wagon because of Penny Hart.. is it because your dad is out of commission.. trying to climb that social ladder in Carroll..
..break up and I didn't know about it..
..he somehow ends up in the middle of everything despite being the most boring person..
..didn't pop that Reynolds baby without a few dollar signs in her eyes..
At this point, Jesse was just scrolling through the blog posts as he stumbled walked the streets of Carroll. Clicking into and out of video clips he had already watched multiple times over by now, each time stoking a fresh lick of anger and upset straight through him. This stupid bitch..
---- FLASHBACK FEB 11TH: ----
He'd seen this in a movie once, figured he would see if it worked.
Jesse hunkered down besides a random vehicle, the stench of alcohol heavy on his breathโ dressed head-to-toe in black, with gloved hands and a pair of sneakers on lifted from the local thrift store. After a quick peek over the trunk of this car, he flipped open its gas tank and unscrewed the gas cap. A rolled up washcloth got jammed inside, partially hanging out. Jesse fumbled in his pocket for the matchbook; a match was struck, the flame lighting up his serious face briefly, before the tail end of the washcloth was lit and he scrambled back from the parked car.
His figure was seen darting across the lawn, hiding at the back of the house. At his feet, several already prepared molotov cocktails sat waiting. One unfinished bottle got swiped up, Jesse chugging down several gulps of the liquid insideโ
An explosion burst through the neighborhood.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
He paused. Looked up.
Chairos Arts Gallery.
Tears immediately pricked at the backs of his eyes. An ugly lurch inside his chest. Despite the hour, those long, floor-to-ceiling windows of the second floor studio were lit up with obvious signs of life from the pacing artist within. Elio.
Jesse looked back down at his phone, expelling a heavy breath and tasting the liquor on it. Hitting call on Elio's contact.
Coward.
It went to voicemail. It often did, when the artist was fully immersed into whatever latest piece he was working on. A small, miserable blessing for the salvager, because it meant he didn't have to talk to him. He didn't know if he'd be able to do it, if he actually had to face Elio, or hear his voice. One upset look, one soft pleaโ it'd destroy the resolve.
The beep sounded.
"Hey.. it's Jess.." Jesse's voice was hoarse and low. He cleared his throat, looking back up at the windows. At the indiscernible, pacing figure. Wanting him as much as he ever did, since the first moment he'd seen him. "I ah," another gruff rumble from his throat, "don't.." his tone tremored on the word, betraying the conviction, "..wanna do this anymore.." A hand came up to drag over his face, inhaling sharply. "It ain't you." These words, at least, came out firm and sure, almost forceful, as he repeated, "It ain't you."
Of course it wasn't Elio.
It was Jesse. It was always Jesse.
The man had too much baggage. Too many hangups to get past. Too much going on. This entire year had been a wild roller coaster of emotions and happenings he could barely comprehend anymore.
And now, with the latest breakup between Holden and Penny.
With Gus' heart attack.
He couldn't do it anymore.
---- FLASHBACK FEB 11TH: ----
Well, he was in it now.
"Shit," Jesse flung onto the ground, covering his head to protect himself from flying debris. The car had become a burning inferno. Cautiously, he looked up from the ground, the fire so intense he could feel its heat from there. "Can't believe that fuckin' worked.." His eyes were wide, almost shocked and scared by the scene he'd caused.
It had disturbed the entire neighborhood.
Some people were checking through their blinds. Others opened their doors or windows. A few had wandered out onto their lawns and called out to one another in alarm, trying to deduce what the fuck just happened. He almost got spooked from finishing the job.
If Britney herself hadn't come running outside, screeching demands on what the hell happened to her car. Who did this?!
As if on autopilot, throat dry, Jesse moved.
His foot came up to smash in the basement windows of the very house Britney just came from. The very one he'd been hiding besides. With shaking hands, he quickly began to light the ends of each molotov bottle and whip them through the broken window, one-by-one. Each bottle shattered in different areas, scattering alcohol and flames that spread like wildfire.
Britney's TheTea entire operationโ the makeshift studio, the computer, the radio equipment, everythingโ engulfed by a raging, uncontrolled fire.
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Hands grabbed onto the steel bars, pulling himself up and over Port Carroll's gated community fence. Jesse landed unsteadily on his feet, wiping his nose with the back of his hand, vision a tad blurry from his tears. But he already knew where he was going. Knew which house it was. Had known for months now, ever since she relocated.
This bitch had to be stopped.
He didn't care how many times it took.
Penny almost died because of this gossip. Now, with what's happened with Holden, everything felt unstable again. This shit talk was only fanning the flames of an already delicate situation that might just be the tipping point for the girl once more. Only this time, maybe she'd be successful.
Jesse was terrified, she'd be successful.
He didn't feel as if he could leave Penny on her own anymore. If he wasn't with her, someone else was. Not Teddy. Not Naomi. Not Holden. Not anyone that couldn't be trusted to egg her into a state of relapse. His chosen brother was right, he was smothering her. But Jesse didn't know what else to do, to keep her safe and here, with him. She meant everything to him. She, Vera, and Francis...
What if he left her alone, for even a moment, and she got her hands on more coke? What if, after so many months of being off it, she took too much? What if her body couldn't handle it anymore?
Ivan was dead.
Charles had almost died.
Gus, too!
He wasn't his father's son.
The Reynolds had tried to adopt them.
Vera was back. He had a niece.
Holden was messed up.
Ashton got heartbroken.
Valentina asked him to hold that sweet baby girl.
Chuck's best man?! His bachelor party!
That stupid fucking play.
Elio. Elio.
Autumn moved on.
He scaled a second fence, this one for someone's house. Unaware of the camera that twisted in his direction, detecting his movements and clocking his every action.
---- FLASHBACK FEB 11TH: ----
Britney was on the phone now, calling the authorities. Hysterical, angry. Her car was on fire, someone had better get out there now. She couldn't believe this was happening.
"Fire!"
Someone let out a gasping cry, several noticing at once that the house in the background was also burning. Britney's house. The fake radio host turned to witness what everyone was yelling about, fresh shrieks of upset escaping her. Her house, her house!
That was Jesse's cue to get the hell out of here.
As the crowd grew and distant sirens came in, Jesse backed away from the damage. Eyes wide, heart pounding. Suddenly stone cold sober to the reality of what he'd done. He backed away a few steps, before finally turning.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
This time, his luck was out.
Jesse barely had chance to dig the bottle of Jack from his jeans jacket, fully intending to set fire to Britney's precious new, second residence she thought was perfectly safe and untouchable. That she was.
"Hey!"
A shout, the beam of a flashlight on him. The neighborhood's security patrol caught him red-handed, with the alcohol and lit match in hand.
Jesse dropped everything and ran.
The lawn started to catch fire, but the security officer managed to stamp it out quickly as he radioed for backup. Police sirens already coming down the street because her alarm system had long since alerted to his presence.
He was in the process of clumsily climbing down from her fence when a pair of hands roughly yanked him off it.
"Stay downโ stay down! Don't fuckin' move," several hands where shoving Jesse to the ground, someone's knee at his back to pin him there, "you're under arrest! Show us your handsโ hands, now!โ John, help me get 'em upโ"
It all happened so quickly.
Jesse's head was reeling. One moment, they were forcing his arms behind him, slapping on a pair of cuffs. The next, a burly officer had nearly dislocated his shoulder as they yanked him off the ground and frog-marched him towards one of the police vehicles. He wasn't even listening to anything they said. He didn't care when they pushed him into the backseat.
The man scooted over some on the seat. Adjusting, because the bracelets were digging into him.
Then rested his head back, eyes closing, and exhaled what felt like the heaviest breath he'd been holding for who knew how long now.