touch the butt

on my "don't walk to metlife" post I kept seeing people say that drivers would "bergentruck" pedestrians on the turnpike and it turns out that that's a reference to an Undertale meme where a character purposefully runs over people, but the portion of the jersey turnpike that goes to metlife is bergen county, and I had just instantly accepted that there was a term specifically referring to jersey drivers from there. I didn't even question it. Neither would you, if you had ever driven there.

its so frontloaded to the first bit of the book but I really do like Zhongdian Poster Peerless Cucumber's relationship to being a guy who reads Horny Male Power Fantasy Light Novels obsessively and then gets sucked into one with really very little intent of engaging with the power fantasy for himself at all. He just thinks its cool to see Binghe do it. Yes He spends a few chapters being like oh this whips im an immortal master and i can do magic? Hee hee swings my sword around all cool....now im going in the magic caves so i can level up and do sick fighting moves instead of getting my ass kicked all the time....participating in a showy exhibition match and taking a moment to revel in how cool and powerful he is now....and then immediately throwing all of that away to jump in front of and shield the guy who has absolutely bulletproof plot armor and thereby permanently fucking up his ability to powerscale. It does not occur to him to try to like. Get stronger so he can avoid being killed by the incredibly strong protagonist. He doesnt even think of that as possible to do and he's not especially interested. He just likes to kick his feet up and eat some peanuts and watch Binghe do badass protagonist shit.

it’s like rock paper scissors: baby oil defeats condom, baby defeats baby oil, condom defeats baby

I think my favorite kind of miscommunication to do in fanfic is when a character has only limited understanding of a situation (especially if that's because the other character is concealing something from them) and they use their limited knowledge to come to a conclusion that is 100% reasonable based on what they know, but completely off base from the truth

They say that sudden, intense cravings for very specific foods are usually a sign of a vitamin deficiency. If so, that I'm presently making myself french toast, scrambled eggs, and a bacon and cheese sandwich at 11:45 PM must mean the vitamin I'm missing is grease.

I cross-posted this to Bluesky and got followed by a bunch of folks with blog headers clarifying which exact flavour of Christianity they adhere to because they thought I was making a hashtag-relatable post about cheating on your diet. Now we get find out how many of them are also comfortable with posts about werewolf cock.

this fetish stuff is getting out of hand what the fuck is word play

I literally CANNOT read the words "supine" or "prone" in anything without thinking about that post that's like "supine is when you lay on your s(u)pine and prone is when you lay on your pronis"

Tbh I don't understand anyone who denies their favorite character's flaws and acts like they've never done anything wrong when that is like consistently the most interesting part of any character ever

cant believe we’ll never know who ended homophobia because he was anon