A Muse In Time

Bonnie (regular): "Wait, that's such a long journey though!!! I'm not gonna go find you just so I can punch you if you're wrong!!! That's dumb!!! [...] Okay, then I'll believe you!!! Hopefully I won't have to walk forever to punch you!!!"

Bonnie (friendquest): "...I'll miss you, Frin. ... I know you'll leave soon, but, um... Y-You should come by Bambouche one day! So you can meet my sister!!! So I can say... "That's Frin! They helped me a bunch! They're really cool!!!" So come and see me sometime, yeah? Promise? [...] I'll be waiting for you, Frin!!!"

"i know you'll leave soon" "that's such a long journey" assuming that Siffrin would never want to stay close by, that wherever he goes would be arduous for them to reach. ...and, maybe in Siffrin's interpretation, not worth the annoyance and exertion it would take to reach them.

Isabeau (regular): "I can't wait to go back to my old job, you know? Make sure to say hi when you're near Jouvente, 'kay?"

Isabeau (friendquest): "...I hope...I hope you'll at least visit sometime, Sif. Our journey is over, but don't be a stranger, okay?"

Isabeau, short and restrained after his aborted confessions. maybe keeping it brief and simple to not overcomplicate the triumph of the moment, hoping he'll have the chance to express himself properly later (they're all having dinner together tonight, after all! they'll have time for feelings talks then! why wouldn't they?). not wanting to overwhelm or assume. how can he ask for anything more substantial than a visit before Siffrin knows how he feels, what he might want, what Siffrin might want?

Odile (regular): "But now I can finally get back to traveling. [...] It'll be weird to travel alone now, but I'll get used to it again. Or I could just go home to Ka Bue... Hm... [...] Ha...I'll miss you, Siffrin. You're a little strange, but you're a good kid. Maybe try letting down your walls every once in a while, huh? And come to Ka Bue anytime. Maybe we'll meet again during your travels."

Odile (friendquest): "It was fun. Traveling with everyone. I will miss it. [...] I... I suppose everyone will go back to their homes, now... Mirabelle will probably stay here, Isabeau will probably go back to Jouvente, and we'll ask someone to accompany Bonnie back to Bambouche... And what about you, Siffrin? Will you be going back home? [...] Oh... Why no-- ... No. Sorry, this isn't any of my business. But... No home at all... I never knew. I'm sorry. [...] ...I'll probably be going back to Ka Bue soon. Our paths will diverge soon... But if you ever come towards Ka Bue... Please come by, and say hello, won't you? ...Don't be a stranger, Siffrin."

Odile, reinforcing everyone's assumptions, backing away from the opening Siffrin gave her out of respect for their privacy, and sharing more of her own hand than Siffrin may even realize—resigning herself back to the quiet of her own company after the warmth and noise of being with everyone else. but even as a fellow traveler, both ~obviously intending~ to continue their journeys, there's no suggestion that their paths may intertwine deliberately, only inevitably diverge and briefly cross by happenstance or on a whim.

Mirabelle (regular): "...You can be so nice, Siffrin. [...] You know, um, um... Um!!! I know we haven't known each other for that long... B-But I hope you know I really treasure your company! I do! I really really do!!! And so... Thank you! Thank you for accompanying me on this journey! [...] ...I'm sure you're excited to go back to traveling on your own... But don't forget me, okay? Come see me at Dormont anytime! I'd love to hang out! Promise!!!"

Mirabelle (friendquest): "I have a lot ahead of me, still. But I never would have realized this without you, Siffrin! S-So, whenever you're done traveling, or you'd like to stay someplace for a little bit... Maybe think about coming to visit Dormont? Just to say hi? B-But you don't have to!!! It's just an idea!!! [...] I'm glad we're friends, Siffrin. ... D-Don't forget about me on your journey, okay!"

Mirabelle got so goddamn close to an actual, straightforward invitation for them to stay with her. "whenever you're done traveling or you'd like to stay someplace for a bit" could be a long-term thing of indefinite duration! but then she anxiously backtracks to "visit," "just say hi," "you don't have to! it was just an idea!" out of fear of coming on too strong, imposing too much. she's the one afraid of being forgotten, here, worrying that she'll fade as easily from their mind as anything else, unmissed. trying to balance emphasizing that his company is something that she genuinely wants, but leaving room for them to back out without feeling awkward if it's not something that they genuinely want.

in every case, Siffrin's plans "to keep/go back to traveling" are assumed, the distance is assumed, the separation is inevitable. it's all Siffrin can hear, couched in polite, socially mandated overtures to keep in touch. everyone will be gone and they will be alone again, outside of brief, occasional reunions (and always reunions that he would have to impose to initiate—how can they choose to visit Siffrin if they have no home to visit?—how can Siffrin know if they truly meant it when they asked, if they'll still mean it as time goes on?).

it's all the rest of the party can imagine, too—of course their mysterious rogue will quietly disappear back into the forests and crowds, impossible to find or contact after it's all over. they're left asking, begging, through the clenched teeth of social restraints, not to be left behind or forgotten, either. please visit, they say. don't you get it? don't you know how important to me you've become, how much i want to keep you in my life? they don't say.

and now all i can hear when i read back these lines is

to Bonnie (friendquest): “Yeah, I’ll come by.”

to Isabeau (regular): (You nod.)

to Isabeau (friendquest): (...) (You nod.)

to Odile (first time): (She's smiling at you gently.) (You smile back.) (…)

to Odile (friendquest): (You nod.)

to Mirabelle (first time): (You promise.)

to Mirabelle (friendquest): (. . .) “I'd like that, Mirabelle.”

everyone knows Siffrin is quiet, but that’s probably not the level of enthusiasm they would hope for!!

thinking especially in contrast to when Odile gives him the mirror picture—they don’t just smile, they beam! he doesn’t just nod, he nods furiously in excitement to have this proof of their journey together. the rest of the party is frequently reacting to and commenting on the faces he makes. we know Siffrin can be hugely expressive and obvious with affection even in their silence.

but everything here is restrained and understated as soon as the question of the future is raised.

there are some very telling (...) in several of these conversations, but i feel the shift most sharply in that first conversation with Mirabelle.

she praises them, and he blushes! she talks about how much they mean to her, how grateful she is that he joined her, and he’s smiling so hard it hurts!!

…and then she talks about them separating. about being forgotten.

that extra spacing in (You promise.) is putting in a lot of work. the moment is heavy, suddenly, instead of bursting with joy. the conversation ends.

(Don’t think about it, don’t think about it, don’t think about it.)

i wonder if the rest of the party could feel him pulling away in these moments, even before the loops start straining the smiles he gives them. thinking this is where we lose them, no matter how much they want him to stay, try to let him know that he’s welcome.

maybe they adopt other people’s practices as ~cool quirky aesthetics~ that come and go like fads. because they love sharing and expressing their own faith in personalized ways! they love trying new things! how could it possibly be disrespectful? things fall in and out of fashion. they have traditions and rituals and symbols but they’re never cemented in place as immutable fixtures of the faith. and that’s a sign of growth, flexibility, and individuality! it seems so strange to just do ONE THING forever, right??

but maybe things that are rich and meaningful in another culture/religion get swallowed up, stripped of the depth of their history and context, decoupled from their origins as they’re passed around, until they’re absorbed into the miasma of “different ways to express your faith in the Change God” that ~someone, somewhere~ came up with.

I WOULDN'T WASTE IT, I WOULD LOVE EVERY SECOND!!! THAT BLINDING REPLACEMENT DOESN'T DESERVE IT!!!

i think someone's projecting a little no

(under the cut is another version of someone who is very much not projecting anything at all)

The showing was over and most people were back in their own clothes, except Dawn. Isabeau was cupping their face and making the EXACT expression he is here, hoping that now that the game’s over, Siffrin would come back.

Dawn knew Isabeau wanted something from them, but couldn’t give it. Their eye slid down and they looked away. The HEARTBREAK as Isabeau noticed~!!!

[Post made by Sam and Pedro]

transcript below:

Isabeau Moineau

Isabeau Manon Constantin Moineau is a main character from In Stars and Time! He is canonically transgender and uses he/him pronouns.

“I looked at that kid in the mirror, and I thought... couldn't I just be someone else? Someone that can make friends, someone people could love? Someone I could love? Someone I wouldn't feel ashamed of being?”

(Note: this is a swap au, the starry one is isat Siffrin, I’m not trying to misgender anyone!)

🌙Mars(he/him/she/her) 🌟Lue(They/She)

🌙Outside of astronomy?

🌙(You've thought about it, but. It shouldn't matter)

🌙 This is what the universe wants so..

🌟 Oh, trust me, I'm aware of how important all of this is to you, but. If you don't mind me asking, what do YOU want to do Mars?

🌙 That's.. not important. It doesn't matter what I want.

🌟 I see....

🌟 WELL in that case congratulations Mars.~~

🌙(???)

(Something changes in Lue's tone going from genuine displeasure to sing-songing sweet.)

🌙 For what exactly

🌟 For being an honorary GUIDE~

🌙 (huh?! You don't follow.)

🌟 I know it can be a bit confusing at first but don't worry your cute little head about, Mars!

You seem to already have the basics covered

🌙 what are you talking about? Auncle, you're scaring me

🌟 HAH, "scared" I remember when i used to feel that too.

🌟 Dreams, aspirations, goals, autonomy. Silly things like those simple not made for stars like us~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HUUUH so I wrote a script and imma try and post it in parts

Especially the doomed starchild

Bonus general description

Ah a friend! I happen to have another bug lying around. Though I’m not sure how to introduce them to each other?

OH LOOK! They’re friends!!! Ok I think it’s safe to put them in the same container. I’ll leave them to chat while I go get a bigger container.

Ok I got a bigger one but I’m not sure how to put them in…maybe if I just-WHOOPS!

I didn’t mean to dump them! Ok uhm I should probably go get something for them to eat…I have some food with me but I don’t know which

Sorry that was weird I'll go now

No wait come back……..reaches out,…