Not Me. Wrong Bitch

Spoilers. Duh.

Episode Six part 2

Daryl and Carl bonding is adorable and I’m crying

Merle is a dick. Would gladly kill him. Hope Michonne does. Or Daryl. He’s also a dick for killing that poor kid. He was just trying to be good.

So it just occurred to me that Rick is slowly having a break down and he is probably hallucinating the phone calls and it’s upsetting me low key. I need him to be a dad to Carl and Little Asskicker

Maggie and Glenn are so cute.

Michonne found Glenn and Maggie! And so did Merle fuck. He’s a manipulative dick

Michonne please don’t let them kill Maggie. Or take Glenn. I’m worried about them. Michonne…..

The formula…. Baby Girl needs that.

He didn’t kill Carol. He couldn’t have. (By he I mean the walker)

He is hallucinating them. This sucks. I’m sorry Rick. It’s okay man. Just get better for the baby and Carl.

Rick is there for the baby and Carl.

Michonne is at the prison!! I love her good job!!

Episode Seven

Merle is a dick congrats dude. I’m gonna kill him with my bare hands.

Glenn is a badass I love him. You go dude.

Michonne trust them a little bit. Please.

Daryl don’t be a dick. Please don’t make them hurt her.

Michonne baby just trust them a little. I promise they are good people. Good girl. I hope they can save Glenn and Maggie.

Merle knows about Andrea. He knows that Glenn is lying. This is bad.

Carl is so cute. Judith is cute and he’s so sweet to want to name his little sister.

The governor scares me. Hate him. Andrea is seeing some sketchy things and I’m not chill with that.

Yea I hate this. He super sketch. Is this the governors dad? I’m so confused by this.

Merle did you really make a Chinese food joke about a walker eating Glenn?? Dick move man.

I repeat my earlier statement. Glenn is a badass.

Governor is a dick and I love Maggie. I’m so sorry hun. I wish I could run him over with a bus.

I’m attracted to Daryl and I’m not ashamed to admit that. High key really into his second in command thing.

Little signals and non verbal communicating. Makes me feel good. I love their dynamic, amazing.

Oh my god brutal but effective. Love it.

Reanimated dead man with prostate cancer. Nice. Good job Andrea. Man was gonna kill some people.

Rick and Daryl and Michonne are a great team 100/10 would recommend

Episode Eight

New survivors are always interesting. Not sure what to think about them though

Oh they found the prison. Yikes.

Andrea you look like his wife. That’s a red flag in the zombie apocalypse ma’am

Damn governor and his zombie child. Yikes.

Is he feeding her? How has she not starved? Oh he is. Yikes that is even worse.

Maggie is awesome but also scared. I’m worried about her. I don’t want her to break down.

Gross Glenn. That’s really gross. Genius but gross

That guy is a gross pedophile. She’s SEVENTEEN and also gross Carol is not going to be with you you dick.

Badass Glenn and Maggie part 738928271719191119101010191818630

Rick and Daryl and Michonne heard that. They can save them. Please.

“I need you” Rick and Daryl my platonic soulmates. I’ve determined this.

Red flags everywhere Andrea. Listen carefully.

Michonne you badass. You’re gonna kill his daughter. I love you.

Andrea don’t kill your friends. Also, more red flags with that dick. Just because you are a woman doesn’t mean you can’t be a badass fighter too.

Don’t hallucinate now Rick. It’s not the time.

Carl is a badass kid I love him so much. He’s also compassionate I can totally see him helping the others that wandered in. Good man. He totally is helping them. Love him.

Oh man Michonne found his hall of horrors. All those heads in tanks. And his kid. Hell yea. She doesn’t realize yet. Oh no.

The Governor has a weak spot. His fucking zombie daughter. Oh my god she’s amazing just sword through her mouth like a badass I love Michonne so much.

Oh my god she stabbed him in the EYE WITH ZOMBIE GLASS

Andrea come on. Don’t be like this. Michonne is protecting your family. Yea you see the red flags now. Look at them all. And by flags I mean heads. You see zombie heads.

Carl is a good kid. And smart too.

Michonne and the “terrorists” were trying to get Glenn and Maggie. Not to kill you, asswad

Daryl better be okay cuz I’m not gonna be okay if he’s not.

Merle is gonna be killed and I’m HERE FOR IT.

Okay never mind. Don’t kill Daryl do kill Merle. That sounds good.

Episode Nine

Daryl is a badass and I would gladly die for him.

God what a cinematic masterpiece with the smoke and the governor. Fantastic.

Walkers in Woodbury. Fantastic.

Good job Rick. Shut that asshole up.

“You’re part of that family.” Daryl baby I love you baby please stay. Platonic glances and friendship and just generally being good partners.

Daryl is gone and Glenn is angry. I’m sorry for that. And maybe Glenn is gone too

Easy Rick. Don’t check out now. Judith needs you.

I’m proud of Andrea. She might be the leader of a “rival” group, but she could definitely be the good leader and make them a great community without a terrible leader.

The bassinet is labeled Lil Asskicker. I’m gonna cry.

Ricks gonna let them stay. I’m proud of him for taking a risk. Even though he’s still kinda crazy. Okay never mind. Man isn’t taking a risk and very much so is crazy

Episode Ten

Crisis mode Rick engaged. We really need Daryl back to help him.

Daryl and Rick are platonic soulmates you can’t change my mind.

Michonne knows he’s crazy. Uh oh.

Watch me go on a journey of self discovery and simping.

TW discussion of death/zombies and swearing and caps

Day One

Episode One

Michonne with her machete and zombies on leashes “am I attracted to this?”

Also, Maggie in her rugged survivalist look? Definitely attracted to this.

Holy shit Rick what the fuck??? No hesitation just chop that leg off. Damn.

Episode Two

Carl baby please be careful I love you. Don’t be that way, be safe and don’t put yourself in danger of zombies my dude

Holy shit he just killed the big guy no hesitation why did the prisoner do that??

Also what the fuck Rick??? No hesitation again machete to the brain. Mans is badass and also scary. Also locking that other prisoner outside with the walkers??

Carol is a badass and I love her. She definitely was able to grow into an amazing character despite her hardships. I’m glad she is taking it upon herself to learn how to take care of the baby and make sure she can have the baby safely.

I just jumped out of my skin Hershel please don’t scare me like that???

Maggie is so pretty oh my god

Walkers are gross.

Is that michonne and Andrea watching? Who’s watching her cut open that girl?

Episode Three

Helicopter crash? People still using a helicopter? In contact with people?

Andrea is really sick. I’m worried about her.

Also, definitely attracted to Michonne with her machete.

Oh gross but also awesome that dude is chopped in half

OHHH TRUCK who’s that?? Is it our boys? Nope not our boys. Yikes these guys sound scary. Yep totally scary. They killed the survivors. Yikes. I hope Michonne knows what she is doing.

Is that Daryl’s brother?? Merle?? Totally is!! Too bad he’s a dick

Government experiments? This is what I’m thinking.

The governor makes me uneasy. I don’t like him. Michonne doesn’t either, which makes me think she’s right.

Michonne has this really sexy kinda wild woman look. Almost feral, half tamed. It’s so attractive oh my god

The governor just totally shot and killed all of those military men. What the actual fuck??? This show has more plot twists than zombies, and that’s saying something.

He’s a manipulative bastard fuck him. Creepy ass man with heads in tanks in his creepy as room.

Episode Four

Why are we luring walkers inside?? Who’s doing this? Is this gonna hurt my boys?

Rick is kinda dark in this. I don’t know how to feel. I really like Daryl though. He’s easily my favorite.

Merle is a huge dick. Holy shit. Anybody he vouches for is automatically not a good person. Except Daryl.

Who the fuck is trying to kill the prison? I’m not happy with this.

Ma’am now is not the time to be having a baby. Of course she would have a hard labor. Ma’am now is NOT THE TIME TO BE DYING

T Dog is dead and I am crying now thanks

Oh my god it’s the crazy prisoner from before. I should have known that would come back to bite Rick in the ass.

Maggie is amazing I would die for her. Literally die for her. Also Carl. Would die for him. I hate that he has to watch his mom die. I hate this. CARL NO DONT DO IT YOU CANT SHOOT YOUR MOM AND BE OKAY

Episode Five

I’m low key pissed at the governor and his “paradise” cuz Carl deserves better and I will die on that hill

Does he have a walker little girl? Is that his daughter? What the fuck??

My cat is trying her hardest to escape my dorm room because I am gasping so much.

Rick you cannot check out now. Your baby and your son need you.

Okay never mind maybe you can that’s low key kinda hot. Feral Rick is low key kinda attractive. Am I discovering something about myself rn?

Yep I’ve never been more attracted to a woman with a sword before

“They were family.” I’m crying. Glenn love.

The Governor can suck my dick. He’s an asshole and a manipulative dickwad.

Oh my god that is genius a walker trap with wind machine and giant pits. Genius.

Daryl being all protective and a good second in command makes me feel some type of way (holy shit I am discovering something about myself)

If there are small children walkers, I’m gonna lose my shit.

Merle is awful and I would gladly run him over with a bus. Repeatedly.

Andrea is seeing what Michonne is seeing. I hate that she was gaslit by that dick. Okay she’s still being gaslit by him. Damn it Andrea just go.

Michonne gives me high key bottom lesbian energy. Don’t @ me I’m right

I don’t want kids and Daryl holding a baby makes me explode a little

“Little asskicker” is adorable and I love Daryl so much.

The walker got to Lori before Rick did and he’s really upset about it and now he is digging in the walkers stomach and I’m not happy with it. Yikes

Daryl is so soft oh my god I love him.

Who tf calls an empty prison during a zombie apocalypse?

Episode Six

Michonne is a badass. “GO back” wrote with a literally zombies arms and legs as the g and o and using a literal torso as back is so funny to me and is ICONIC

Literally a Queen just a badass woman ❤️

Who tf is on the phone? A woman? In Woodbury?

Merle is a dick to everyone. At least he’s consistent

Puns in a zombie apocalypse are funny but maybe not appropriate?

Man on the phone is a dick

Is Rick losing his mind? I doubt it, but like maybe. Also Hershel is amazing for an old dude with one leg

Okay I was googling photos of Maggie and Michonne, and like hello pretty women

But then like hello??? Am I more attracted to them or do I want them together??? But like Glenn and Maggie is really cute.