Not a cooking blog

Oh so when your mom puts a little bit of her heart in every meal that's fine, but when I, Harrowhark the First,

This. Please. Whether I'm avoiding spoilers for a show or people promoting eating disorders, if I block a tag it means I don't want to see it. Spell your fucking tags properly.

WE SAY SHIT HERE SIR

Gideon and Harrow

You disassemble John? You disassemble John for eating peanuts and also doing countless atrocities? Oh! Oh! Disintegration for Mercymorn! Disintegration for ten thousand years!

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

has anyone figured out how to turn off the thing where you love your pet so much it slides inexorably into grief-borrowing

“For me this glass is already broken. I enjoy it; I drink out of it. It holds my water admirably, sometimes even reflecting the sun in beautiful patterns. If I should tap it, it has a lovely ring to it. But when I put this glass on the shelf and the wind knocks it over or my elbow brushes it off the table and it falls to the ground and shatters, I say, ‘Of course.’ When I understand that the glass is already broken, every moment with it is precious.”

The knight is doing her best to fend off the bandit ambush, so if the princess could please stop flashing her tits because it's "funny to distract her", that would be greatly appreciated

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

re-reading harrow the ninth and understanding what is actually happening is so funny cuz harrow will be fighting for her life and gideon is just like "yeah so that part of the sword is called the pommel by the way. in case you were curious. you keep getting that wrong"