it'll hurt half as much if you drive twice as fast

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son

the enemy of my enemy is also my enemy I fucking hate that guy

shdhjrjf hubris will be my downfall, first ride of the season has me googling the route to passo dello stelvio

got my dads old mapbooks out #itssover

I once wore green cargo pants with a black hoodie in Belfast in the mid 2000s and two separate people yelled "alright there Kim Possible?"

the fun thing about f1 is that I only care about like 3 of these guys, everyone else is allowed to have a terrible day