Stardate 43539.1

hits your cervix with my car

imagine coming home and your mom found your steampunk clothes and shes just there with her arms crossed

she's holding up a ziplock bag of gears and springs asking you what they're for

does getting cursed by a witch show up in drug tests

“Put him on his knees give him something to believe in” has the exact same energy and depth of meaning as anything Hozier puts out on the regular but since it’s sung by Megan Thee Stallion no one takes it seriously. In this essay I will-

To flesh this out a little bit more: both Megan Thee Stallion and Hozier write and sing really sexual songs, but they’re different in that Hozier’s music is typically “let me worship you” while Megan’s is usually “I’m worshipping myself,” which makes all the difference because it’s an acceptance of power rather than the giving of it. He’s the sinner, she’s the saint. However, taking their difference in genres out of it, people don’t usually seem to take Megan Thee Stallion’s music seriously in comparison to Hozier because a) her lyrics are more overtly and blatantly sexual and b)she’s claiming her sexuality for herself, and that scares a lot of people. The secret, no-one-wants-to-talk-about reason is that she’s a confident black woman, which terrifies people way than sex does. In conclusion, Hozier and Megan Thee Stallion are two sides of the same poetic, sexual coin, but people just don’t want to admit it. Which is WHY a collaboration between Hozier and Megan would be so powerful that it would change the timeline as we know it yes I will elaborate 

(via sobcat, staree)

“Oh I like my porn so esoteric and cerebral I’m so ughhhh intelligent” okay well I like it when a bunch of smoking hot chicks just really give each other the business so can we hold space for that.

[youtube shorts loop] and that's why: darkness favors the sharpest blade

Why do all minotaurs in media have nipple rings. Who's piercing their nipples. and How do I qualify for this job.

Yu-Gi-Oh fans really saw the scalpers coming and said "You've activated my trap card".

Hello bisexual community

Begin killing