Petty In Pink

Holy guacamole and cheddy cheese!

“I mean, that’s not really that impres–JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.”

JESUS FUCK

dont you sick fucks make me relive this

SI TE ROG…. IUBIREA MEA PRIMESTE  FERICIEEEEEAAAA  

si sunt voinic

Dar sa stii nu-ti cer nimic😂😂😂

VREI SA PLECI DAR

Nu mă, nu mă ieei

NU MĂ, NU MĂ IEI

nu mă, nu mă, nu mă iei

I have no idea what happened here

Lucky bastard. It’s stuck in my head now

Mya mintesc day oki tay-yay

am i having a stroke

What is this? What is this from? Why do thousands of people know what this is. Apparently it’s Romanian. What is it??

We’ve finally reached the point where the old memes are too old for today’s generation… Fs in the chat.

For any wretched zoomers…one of the original viral videos aka the finest of vintage memes

We must not despair as long as we are here, we can teach the children about the ancient texts

The best boy💕

skfkslckcnelcncn okay I’m at work yesterday and my coworker is telling me about her husband and 2 kids and is bitching and I’m like go. off. because that’s what I do and she says to me “the litter box is HIS responsibility and most of the time he doesnt even do that!!” and I immediately say. “That’s all he does??” because girl just told me she took out the trash and did dishes and cared for her fucking children all before coming into work that morning and shes like “…. that’s not ALL he does……..” like. every time I talk to a girl in a bad relationship a part of me dies. you dont have to be his mom too. he’s not the three year old. he’s not a fucking tamagotchi that if you forget to feed him and wipe his ass he dies in a pile of his own shit. ladies if he dies he dies

ladies, if he dies, he dies!

This post isn’t written in any known human language

Is this what understanding a newspaper political cartoon is like?

WHERE-MY-HUG-AT- GASTON

One thing I’ve learned in life, if you act really self-assured and confident you can pretty much get away with anything.

For example, I’ve watched someone walk on to a plane with no passport. Just walked right on.

Once walked out of a dude’s house with a pair of his pants slung over my shoulder. Did all the usual eye-contact, saying-goodbye movements and noises, just… while stealing his pants. He did not notice. 

I told my English teacher that she graded my final paper(I did not turn one in) and that she told me it was well written. She scrambled 3 days trying to find the nonexistent paper, then apologized to me for losing it and gave me a 96%. Confidence is key

my dad’s mate just walked out of a shop with a canoe and didn’t get questioned

Humans are like bees: if they sense you’re an intruder all hell will break loose, but if you get inside the hive they just assume you belong there. Be confident.

Bee confident

This is funny but also true, and a huge tip when traveling. Act like you belong, and you won’t be bothered like other tourists might. Especially on public transportation… do your research ahead of time and look like a disinterested commuter and you’ll blend right in.

Fun Fact about Bees: they use pheromones to communicate and the pheromone to signal ALARM is the same chemical that makes bananas smell like bananas so if you eat a banana and then breathe on a beehive you will regret it and this seemed relevant when i started writing it

What a cool dog.