...doof.

having a headache while hydrated is so unfair. you were supposed to protect me.

i genuinely don't think there's much, if anything, hotter than someone clearly having a blast doing something they're really good at. doesn't really matter what it is. the combo of competence and joy is absolutely lethal to me

Your friend’s unpublished fic idea is kind of a dead wife

i also want to read this guy’s dead wife

if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit

Wow! Local creator discovers new hobby that involves sitting in one place for hours at a time and paying very close attention to tiny details! Surely this will not lead to eye strain or back issues!

"den Umständen entsprechend" is one of my favourite german phrases of all time. Ich sag dir nicht was die Umstände sind, wenn du die nicht kennst ist das dein Problem. ultimate boss of nuance. "it is what it is" but 10 times more german. Ich geh mich jetzt den Umständen ersprechend aus dem Fenster werfen

Auch so ein banger: "Mit dem gebührenden Respekt". Meistens gar keiner, wenn ich die Phrase auspacken muss. Kann man aber nix gegen sagen, weil kann ja auch all der Respekt sein. Who knows? Me. I do. It's none.