Jack Z is too good, too pure.

Zimmboni,- Jack Zimmerman fanart for @omgcheckplease (100% check out this webcomic!)

However, since Bitty doesn’t personally watch hockey and actively avoids it, he doesn’t think it’ll be a problem and just jokes about it to Jack, the cute Canadian guy who he’s pretty sure is a sports photographer

@backwardscapsmh this is what I meant EXACTLY

It gets worse by the fact that Bitty highkey does NOT recognize a single player except for people not on the Falcs and the somewhat nearby teams, so Jack keeps accidentally introducing Bitty to hockey players and they keep buying stuff

Snowy follows Jack to the bakery one day and just goes ‘Oh chill’ and Bitty thinks that he’s Jack’s art friend

Tater follows Jack once and Jack steps on his foot every time he tries to say his name is 'Tater’ (since Ransom loves him), but Bitty thinks that Tater is just a Russian dude who works at the same magazine place Jack does

Georgia hears about it and Jack tags along one day, but Bitty recognizes Georgia as a past hockey player and just jokes with her “I’m glad y'all didn’t bring your team with you!” and Georgia makes direct eye contact with Jack

Kent tries going in once (while Jack was chatting with Bitty) and before he can even get a word out, Bitty shuts down the register, closes the displays, grabs the broom and tells Kent he’s not welcome here

Bob: I’m so glad my son found such a good *friend* (gives a look at Bitty) especially with his job

Bitty: Oh really?

Bob: Yeah, I remember how hard it was for me before I met Alicia! All the fame and stuff really made it difficult

Bitty: Oh! You’re famous??

Bob: I mean, kinda?

Bitty: Oh wow! I didn’t know Jack got his photography talent from his dad!

Bob: What-

Bitty: Where can I see y'all’s work? Jack keeps it a secret, but I wanna know your’s at least!

Bob: UM-

When Alicia walks in, Bitty freaks out, and asks for a photograph since “I didn’t even realize you were in the area!” While Alicia is looking at Bob with the most ??? Face imaginable

Bob then has to pretend that he’s not MARRIED to Alicia for the duration of their visit since Bitty can’t make the connection with them to hockey or else Jack’s cover is blown

(via @otterlyrandom​ )

I’M CACKLING I LOVE THIS

So it works because Bitty tried to start small talk with the hot French Canadian guy who visits his bakery, but gets nervous every time, so he never really can say anything at first. The guy is always a bit curt and quick about his business, and holds his camera like a lifeline sometimes, so Bitty makes sure not to make him uncomfortable, but is interested in him for sure.

But then towards the end of one day, Halo gets put on and Bitty starts singing along while cleaning up the bakery. Bitty turns and accidentally makes direct eye contact with Jack, who was the only person there still, who has his cup halfway to his mouth and an amused look on his face.

Bitty is obviously embarrassed, but then Jack is like “I guess you like this song, huh?” and Bitty goes “Of course I love this song, who doesn’t like Beyoncé?” and Jack goes, “Beyoncé? Is she well known then?”

Dead silence.

Bitty just drops the broom he was holding. Jack looks concerned. Bitty looks horrified.

“Hun, how do you not know Beyoncé? HOW??”

Jack just looks away and is embarrassed and tells Bitty he’s been pretty “caught up in my job, travelling and stuff” and hasn’t had the time to really know pop culture. Plus, he’s French Canadian. 

Bitty then immediately starts to chat with Jack about different artists and pop culture in general, and learns that Jack genuinely just knows none of it. Nothing. Jack has no reference point, he only knows country music. Out of everything. Country. Music.

Bitty then declares that Jack has to let him teach him pop culture if he wants to keep coming to his bakery because “I will not let a single person into this establishment if they don’t know BEYONCÉ!” Bitty is worried he took that too far but then Jack laughs (and it’s a wonderful sound that Bitty unashamedly tucks into his memory) and agrees. As Jack leaves, Bitty just watches him go, realizes the first conversation he had with the hot guy was about him not knowing pop culture and berating him for 15 minutes, and Bitty justs slams his head into the table

jack, smiling: yeah, a bit

kid 1: *GASP*

*

kid 2 (not fully getting the point): are ya scared o’ heights?

jack: no

kid 2: are ya scared o’ planes?

jack: no

kid 2: are ya scared o’ birds?

jack: birds?

kid 2: I’m scared o’ birds.

jack: why?

kid 2: they got weird snake eyes like the snake in the movies when at night they’re in the windows

jack: yeah that’s scary. are you scared sometimes that a bird will come close even if there are no birds around?

kid 2: yeah!

jack: that’s like anxiety! your brain tells you to watch out for mean birds all the time, even though there aren’t any around, and birds wouldn’t hurt you anyway.

kid 2: okay. (pause) are ya scared o’ bugs?

jack: ha, I’ll tell you a secret, I am, a bit. but my boyfriend usually takes them out for me.

kid 2: thass’ very nice o’ him!

huh… tbh i have not met her before! (are there posts out there that i am missing??)

but that doesn’t mean i don’t love her! STREAM OF CONSCIOUS TIME!

let’s see… does she transition after finishing up in the NHL? let’s go… yes. in fact, lets go Kent didn’t know she was trans until after the NHL. like i know this isn’t the more popular “a part of her always knew” trans headcanon (at least i see it on my dash in relation to other people) but lets just say kent was so worried about being attracted to dudes and people finding out about that that she never actually considered her gender identity all that much. it was more… she would see fun dresses and think “wow that would be fun to wear” and wander sephora sometimes and think “dude, wearing all this must be awesome” even though she was supposed to be in there to get cologne and obviously dresses and makeup don’t equal = woman so kent thought “well okay” and left it at that. while in the nhl, she had other things to worry about. and no time to really worry about anything. (she made herself not have time, it was easier that way). 

it’s only after (career ending injury at only 32… one of the most gruesome things seen on the ice… always knew his size was risky, steve… still, you had to see it happen, you hate to see it happen) that kent has the time to really think about this because suddenly she has time on time to look at youtube and she starts with coming out videos but those “recommended vids” lead her to trans youtubers talking about their transitions and kent…

kent has always liked her body, really. it can do some pretty awesome shit (well… it used to be able to). and she has always liked that her height makes her shorter than most of the guys she knows and her face is pretty delicate for a dude so its not exactly that she hates being a guy, it’s just that one day she is watching more of her youtubers (really perhaps that should have been her first clue, that she was so obsessed with these stories) and she thinks “well. yeah. being a girl would be better. that…. that makes more sense. i would like that.”

Me after I drew this.

When you remove shitty’s mustache it makes him look like 8 years younger

so i just felt like i couldn’t drop this issue and wanted to get some more thoughts out regarding the whole “placing bets” thing…