i’ll literally never have enough of that dylan b hollis dude cause like. hes a college student who just.,.blew up on tiktok. he has the soul of a man who has lived for 60 years in the body of a twink. he cooks and is surprised every single time. he goes CINAMIN everytime he uses cinnamon. he has the kitchen of a 60s house wife and cooks like hes going to kill someone

- Floof powder

F I R E

“I’m going to assume we have the same size package, although the last time I assumed that I wound up stunned and quite self-conscious.”

“Nothing says the holidays like AMBIGUOUS MEAT!”

scooby doo mystery incorporated is crazy bc can you imagine if you were raised adopted but you didnt know and your dad was super emotionally unavailable your entire life and then when you found out your dad wasnt your bio parent he immediately went to jail and your bio parents came into your life for the first time and after spending ~1 month bonding they ally with the evil german parrot who wants to kill you and wake up an evil entity and start actively working to help him kill you and wake up the evil entity. and then when the parrot succeeds in his plan the evil entity he was trying to awaken just immediately kills him and then it also eats your bio parents. and then almost immediately after it takes your adoptive dad out of jail and eats him too. and then you and your friends defeat the entity and you wake up in an alternate reality where the adoptive dad who you came to view as your real dad was just your football coach/principal and your evil insane parents were suddenly really nice and you can never get therapy for what you went through because reality reset and none of what happened actually happened in this universe. youve taken over a life that isnt yours and your memories of the past year or so are all fake they never happened. what the fuck.

i just met an actual wizard on the train and im grieving because i know i’ll never meet anyone that cool for the rest of my life