An Understanding | Rick Grimes
Summary: After pulling a dangerous stunt in a run, Rick seeks to teach you a lesson.
Warnings: Smut, Dom!Rick, Rough Sex, Sub drop if you squint.
At least that's what you told yourself as you quickened your steps. No. You just needed to go back. Go back to the house. Before he catches up to you.
You'd made it to the porch. The house was silent, courtesy of Olivia taking Judith in. And you thanked your lucky stars that Carl was out. No doubt hanging around with Enid. You've never been more grateful in your life to have the kids out of the house.
Reaching for the door, you'd thought yourself lucky to have made it this far without him hounding on your back. You knew that you made a mistake today. A big one but you thought maybe he'd already gotten over it. Maybe he just went back to the armory, checking, making sure that everything was going back to its place. Maybe he'll just go on about his day. And maybe he'd come back to the house when you and the kids have already gone to bed. However, you weren't that fortunate.
A hand reached out, clasping tight around your arm and you closed your eyes as you felt him turn you towards him.
"Y/N," he hissed, face close to yours, his breath fanning out on your cheek, "What the heck was that?"
You didn't bother saying anything. That would turn out to be another mistake. It seemed that today was going to be filled with a lot of those.
"Answer me," you opened your eyes to see his chest moving fast, like a bull who has a matador within his sight. And there you were with your silence, red as you waved it in front of him. His frustration grew and when he saw you weren't going to answer anytime soon, he dragged you into the house.
You blinked and found yourself pushed against the wall.
"What the hell were you thinking? Pulling a stunt like that? Huh?" You shut your eyes, remembering what happened on the run.
You'd all went to a shopping centre that Glenn had scouted before. With no sight of a big number of walkers, you'd all made a run there in the hopes of finding whatever you can find. Diapers, formula, antibiotics, gauze. So many things needed, so little the chance of finding them was. But you'd held out hope.
It was expected to not find all you wanted but you still looted a decent amount of stuff. You'd gone into the pharmacy, jumping over the countertop and tried to find anything useful. Rick had been across from you, inside a clothing store. And when you saw him lift a small dress, a frilly orange thing, your heart had clenched at the sight.
You forced yourself not to stare, moving your attention to the shelves in front you. You had no idea what you were grabbing but you gathered all you can take in a plastic bag you found lying on the side.
You were pushing the heavily filled bag to the other side of the counter when you heard it. The sound of the unmistakable growls of walkers. It was coming from behind you and once you turned around you found more than half a dozen of those dead ones. That probably was the moment when the reality of the situation had set in for you. Where had they come from? Glancing behind them, you saw the open storage room door. How long had they been there for?
You'd grabbed your knife, the handle cool against your palm, when Daryl shouted,
You didn't turn back, but instead took a step towards the walker closest to you and thrust your knife in that small spot in-between the eyes. More came out of that damned storage room, and it was like being dunked into cold water. There were too many. You couldn't take them all. And neither could the rest.
And that's when you made a decision.
Turning back, you looked up at the metal shutters. You'd bumped your head into them when you stood up after jumping over the counter but now you were glad. Because now you knew what to do.
You reached over, arms straining to grab the shutters. Rick had dropped the dress, making his way over to you, machete in hand, the rest following close behind but there's no need. You'll make sure to give them a chance.
Not able to deny yourself one last look, you let a small smile stretch across your face. And Rick's eyes widened as if just now realising what you wanted to do, jaw going slack and that's when you pulled.
The heavy clang of the metal was loud in the small space behind the counter. It only helped in cementing the walkers' attention to you if it weren't already but that was the plan. So it was fine. Everything was fine. You didn't plan on dying. Quickly that is. At least not without a fight.
You were readying yourself, planning on lunging towards the first walker to get close enough when you saw it. A cramped little window, just above one of the shelving units on the left side. That's when a small thing unfurled within you. You didn't dare call it hope yet but it got you moving, darting towards the other side, hands gripping the shelves as you began to climb. You heard the groans behind you, worryingly close but you were nudging the window now, pushing it open.
The shelving unit began to shake as the walkers pushed their weight forward. The window slid forward and you wedged your way through the opening. It was a tight fit but nothing that a bit of wiggling couldn't solve. One last push through and you were out, panting on the ground, the asphalt hard and hot beneath your palms. It felt like your heart was trying to carve its way out of your chest.
When your breathing had settled down, you stood up. You weren't far from the gate. The window had led you on the other side of the shopping centre and now you had to make your way to it again.
Walking around, you shook away the remnants of fear. The shaking of your hands, the shudder running down your back. No. It wouldn't do to be afraid. The worst was over. Hopefully.
You'd turned around the corner and found them. Right in front of the gate, clustered together, murmuring amongst themselves. You got closer and saw Rick holding a hand to his face, expression hidden from you but whatever it was that he was hearing from Glenn had him shaking his head. You could practically see the agitation, stringing his back straight. He looked ready to implode. Daryl was at his back, crossbow in his hands as his eyes flitted between the men.
However, when you got closer, finally within their sights, Sasha was the first to notice. Her eyes widened when she saw you. Her arms going limp, the gun lowering, and then she was running.
"Y/N!" She threw her arms around you and you found yourself leaning into the comfort provided. When you looked up, you found Rick already looking at you. And you almost took a step back at seeing the expression on his face.
The rest of the group had welcomed you back, giving hugs and occasional pats to the shoulder but Rick didn't even come close. When things had settled down and their surprise and happiness has turned into relief at your survival, Rick has just shook head, his jaw tightening before turning away.
He wasn't happy. But he was alive. That's what matters.
The group had noticed the absence of a reunion between you and Rick. And soon enough you were all walking back to Alexandria in silence. When you reached the gate, you hoped that Rick would be too busy with anything for the rest of the day. You hoped that you'd be granted reprieve. However, it seems there were other things planned for you.
The hands around your arms tightened and your were brought back to the present.
"Open your goddamn eyes, y/n," he let out. You looked at him and you thought you could almost cut yourself on the sharp line of his jaw, "You wanna tell me what that was back there?"
You don't know what happened in that moment. Was it the fact that you felt his body pressed up against you, chest to chest? Or was it the little pants he let out between each word as if it was physically exhausting to hold himself back? Whatever it was, it had that tiny thing in your lower tummy unfold. Pulsating. Wanting to spread its warmth until all you could feel is the need and nothing else.
"It was the right thing to do, Rick," You were surprised at how steady your voice sounded, "The only way. Carl and Judith can't lose you. And if it was you or me that had to get out. I'd always choose you."
"You can't fucking do that, y/n," Rick pressed closer and oh. You were so wet, it was like a fucking waterfall between your legs. You wondered if he noticed that, how much you wanted him. And when you shifted, you became aware of his need pressing against your thigh. "It's not your fucking decision to make."
"And who's gonna stop me, Rick?" You raised a hand to his chest, feeling the strength of the muscles that lay beneath his shirt, feeling the hammering of his heart beat. Maybe it wasn't the anger that had his heart kicking into overdrive. "You?"
"Yes," he hissed and your faces were that much closer. All you had to do to take his lips was stand on your toes. But you didn't. Not yet. A moment passed. You stared into each other's eyes. You wondered what he saw in them because you felt him almost take a step back, his shoulders lowering. But then it was like you'd been imagining things. Rick pressed so deliciously close to, body tight against you, and sealed his lips over yours.
So good in fact it had you gushing. Your insides melting like he'd just lit them on fire. And it was like he sensed it too, sensed that burning inside of you because before you knew it his tongue was rolling in your mouth, pushin in.
You weren't sure how long it was but when he pulled back your head was full of cotton. Hazy. It took a while for you to remember what you were arguing about in the first place.
"You think you can just go on and do things on your own? Think you can leave me behind?" His thigh was pressed between your legs, and you groaned, hips moving forward, humping down on his knee. You were staring at him, forced to witness the anger in his eyes. Anger at you. It was when Rick pushed you back, pinning you againt the wall, halting you from finding any release that you realised he was expecting an answer.
"I did it for you, Rick," You let out, a whine making its way out of your throat. You were getting desperate now. For him to understand you or for him to let you continue rolling your pussy on his knee you didn't know.
"I don't care if it was for me. Don't ever do that," He pressed in closer, his hands keeping your arms by your side, "I can't lose you, y/n," his voice didn't break but the distress at the idea of you being in danger again was clear.
"Do you understand me, y/n?"
"Yes," You breathed out and he groaned as if he was hurt, as if you'd taken a shot at him before pressing his lips to yours, sucking hard at them. You were sure by the end of this they'd be puffed up and swollen red from the attention.
His hands landed on your face, holding you to him and you groaned once one of them gripped at your hair, tight, pulling your head back. You let out a soft cry as he bit down at your neck, sucking and licking a path down to your collarbone. This was good. It was numbing. It made your head empty, no thoughts whatsoever except for the feeling of his hand, lips and tongue on you.
At feeling the hard bulge pressed against your hip, you reached a hand down, fingers fumbling with his belt before you pulled down his zipper. Rick groaned once you palmed him through his briefs, pulling back to look at you.
"Pull me out, y/n," he let out and you did just that. Pulling his cock out until it lay heavy and red in your palm. You looked down and felt yourself get wetter at the thought of him all hard because of you.
"You see what you do to me?" His breath fanned your cheek and you nodded almost absentmindedly, mind still too focused on the weight of his cock in your hand, "Then take some fucking responsibility for it."
Rick bared his teeth, hands turning you around until your cheek was pressed against the wall. You let out an ugly squawk at the sudden shift that quickly turned to a moan when he got in close, dick pressed in close to where you want it. You could feel yourself seeping through, pussy pulsing hot as slick soaked your panties. Pushing back, you tried to hold in a whine as he rolled his hips, grinding into you.
"You feel that, Y/N?" You nodded your head, frantic pants leaving you. "This is what you do to me, sweetheart."
His hand slid down your chest, slipping between the vee of your thighs, leaving trails of fire in its wake.
"Riiick," You drawled out, back arched, willing him to touch you where you needed. His fingers opened the button of your pants and you couldn't help trying to buck into him, nudge your wet pussy into his palm. But that was the wrong course of action it seemed as his other hand fisted into your hair.
"Aaaah," a whine was pulled out of you.
"I need you to be good for me, y/n," Rick breathed out behind your ear, the hand closest to your cunt stilling. "You hear me?" And maybe it was the hint of desperation in his voice that made you nod your head, eager to please him.
That's all it took for you to melt into his embrace like putty. The hand that gripped your hair soon let go as it busied itself with getting rid of your shirt. When the relentless buttons refused to give in under his careless ministrations, that's when his other hand came up and joined the first into ripping your shirt off.
It was a beautiful day outside and as the buttons of your shirt pitter-pattered on the floor, you thought maybe it could've even been a great day to spend in the garden. But here you were instead. Face pushed against the wall, moments away from a rough fucking.
"Rick," You let out, mourning your shirt as its tatters hung limply around your arms and waist.
"Hush now," His voice was rough, and you're sure if you could turn around and look at him, you'd see his eyes darkened, the blue overtaken by his lust, "I'll have Carol sew it together later."
It was hard to argue after that when his hand cupped your tits, the weight of them filling his palm. He squeezed one of them and you groaned, eyes shut at the firm pressure.
"You ain't never gonna leave me like that, y/n," a hand trailed down your navel until it was stopped by the waist of your jeans. He was panting in your ears as if he'd been running a mile before he stood behind you. "Not again. Not ever," He slid his fingers beneath the strap- finally. You shut your eyes, at feeling your wetness gladly drip into his palm. It hurt. It burnt. You needed him to douse the flames that were currently licking up your deepest insides.
You ground into his fingers, smearing your slick all over them, trying to find your release but the hand on your tit reached to grip your jaw. Firm.
You ignore him, grabbing the hand that's down your panty and pushing it closer to your cunt. It felt good. Like a salve. Like you were hurting deep down in your pussy and this man who was heaving behind you - as if he was under the heaviest of weights - could just make it feel better instead.
But your relief was short lived.
"Ah," your breath punched out of you.
Your cheek was pushed against the wall. Again. This time the sweat almost making you slide down. You felt pinpricks, his hand fisted impossibly tight in your hair. Holding you still. Holding you close.
The hand in your pants left, and instead grabbed yours, both of them. You shut your eyes at the thought of the bruises that were going to undoubtedly show up. He raised your arms up.
"I said. Stay. Still," he was close. His lips brushing your ear, breath hot. Rick took each one of your palms, pushing them against the wall and let go. When your arms fell. He grabbed them and shoved them against the wall again. It didn't take long for you to understand the message.
"You ain't gonna be cummin' on my fingers," Rick growled out. "You don't fuckin' deserve it," His hand slid down back to its place, nestled between your folds. "I'm gonna make sure that everything's alright down here," a long finger pushes inside of you, breaching until it stop at the knuckle.
"That this pussy can take me and once I'm sure, I'm gonna fuck you against this wall," your breaths were becoming faster, excited at the lovely picture appearing in your mind. "And when I'm done, maybe you'll have learnt your lesson."
A whine rips itself out of your throat. An unbearable sadness wells up inside of you. Why doesn't he understand? Why doesn't he get why you've done what you've done? Tears burn your eyes. And at the feeling of a second finger joining the first inside you, you can feel it build up. The burning wave that wants to crest over. You try your best to stay still but your hips betray you every once in a while, twitching back down on the thrusting fingers.
You hold your tears back but then two becomes three inside of your cunt. And that blue sadness gets washed over by that toe-curling white pleasure, mingling with each other until all you can do is try not to drown in it.
You're close now. Rick knows it too. You're clenching down on him, wrestling to keep him there but he pulls out nonetheless. Your chest is rising and falling, the thrumming of your blood a loud white noise in your ear. Your cunt throbs, aching at the emptiness.
The metal of Rick's belt buckle reach your ears and that's when you notice he's breathing as hard as you. You feel the soft flutter of your jeans and panties against your skin as he drags it down to your knees, leaving it there. He presses close to you, the hardness between his legs against the crack of your ass cheeks. Your eyes feel dry when you open them again.
He grunts, his hips snapping against you. You turn your head, slightly, making sure he's looking at you. He is. And despite thinking that Rick looks like he wants to fight, you say, "I'm not sorry," His eyes darken, a snarl lifts the corner of his lip. You'd probably be worried at the expression if it currently didn't feel like your body was in heat.
Keeping your eye on him, you continue, "I never will be."
He bares his teeth at you for a second and you're sure he's gonna eat you. You're certain. But Rick just presses against you. His clothed chest against your back, the buttons of his shirt rough against your skin. His fingers move to your face, squeezing themselves between your lips, forcing their way in. You can taste yourself on them, salty, slick. The smell making you heady.
"I haven't been trying enough, y/n," His other hand fists against his cock, brushing the back of your thigh. "And that's my fault. So I guess I'll just have to teach you your place," the head pushes past your entrance and you gasp, the stretch still causing a delicious burn despite his efforts at opening you up. "Every fucking day," he thrusts, the length of him pushed inside of you completely.
You can hear babbling and it takes you a second to realize it was coming from you.
"Shut up, y/n," He gave another thrust, his fingers - thick and calloused - drove deeper into your mouth, almost reaching the back of your throat. "Don't fucking talk back."
You were drooling, the spit leaking out your mouth after finding nowhere to be with Rick's fingers in your mouth. The sound of slapping skin filled the house. Loud. Obscene.
You were getting close now. You could feel it, heating up your gut, wanting to spread its way through your body. You wished you could touch yourself. But Rick was a heavy weight pressing against your back, preventing you from sliding your hand to where you want it to be.
The thrusts were brutal. Their pace only pushing you closer and closer to that equisiteness you knew was ready to wash over you.
"-iick—" you chocked around his fingers.
"Yeah, I know, y/n," Rick panted against your shoulder. "You're gripping me tight down there," his thrusts slowed down, turning into grinds instead - delicious deep strokes that you could almost feel in your guts. "But the only way you're cumming," Rick pulled back from you. "Is on my cock." He drove in hard and it was like all thoughts had dissipated from your head. He built up that pace again, his hips smacking against your ass.
Rick's shirt stuck to your back, your sweat melding it to you. Your cunt was burning. Set ablaze. It felt like you'd accidentally smacked it against the corner of a table. Those flames were rising up, quickly. And before you knew it, your legs were spasming out, your nerves singing as hot sparks spread through your body.
"Aaaah," your moans were long. Needy. Your bones have turned to jelly. The weight of them becoming impossible for you to bear on your own. But that didn't stop Rick. Instead his thrusts have picked up their speed. Slamming in and out of you, having your eyes roll back, almost in a trance. The slaps of your cunt have turned wet, the gush of your pussy only making it easier for him.
He was close. You could feel it. You could sense the desperation fueling him. Making him seek his pleasure. Your mouth was empty, chin shining with spit. His hands were on either side of your own, entangling with them as he pushed you against the wall until it felt like you couldn't breath.
Rick gave one final thrust and pulled out. Hot spurts of his cum landed on your ass, dripping down. You lamented the loss. Later on, when you've regained the higher functions of your brain, you'll give the man a deep kiss for his careful thinking.
But now you couldn't even pull your legs beneath you to walk. Rick had fucked that ability out of you. So you stayed there — both of you, against the wall, heaving for your breaths. Your sweat has matted your hair to your forehead. For a moment, you were certain that your body was stuck to the wall. But when Rick pulled away, pulling you with him, your body had simply peeled away like a wrapper off a candy.
You stumbled against him and his strong arms lifted you up. You could only close your eyes and lean back on his chest.
When you had opened your eyes again, you were laying on your stomach, naked. Rick was kneeling beside the bed, cleaning you up with a warm towel. You stared, admiring the profile of his face. He rubbed circles into your skin, his hands gentle. So unlike their previous treatment of you. Rick didn't look at you. Not yet. But you were patient.
"You're part of this family, y/n," his hands finished with the towel, setting it aside. Blue eyes snapped to yours. "You know that, right?" Your heart ached at seeing him so lost. So confused. So hurt at the mere idea.
You gave a small nod. Not quite trusting your voice. Rick looked away.
"I can't lose you, y/n," his voice strained. "I can't." His hand found yours and you squeezed him tightly. Offering what comfort you can give. "We can't lose you. Not me. Not Carl. Not Judith. Do you understand?"
"Yes," you croaked out, voice unadjusted.
Rick looked back at you. And you were filled with such sudden affection towards the man. This man who knelt in front of you with fear in his eyes. Fear for you.
"I understand now, Rick."
