Itās a personal story, that Iām not really supposed to know.
When I was born, I was not a healthy baby. The umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck so badly that I was blue when I came out. I was unresponsive to light and sound. I made no noise, not crying, nothing. I barely moved. The doctors were convinced I was mostly brain dead, deaf, blind, and most likely mute. In short, I would be a lot of work, for the foreseeable future, if I lived. They even suggested to my mom that she not take me home, but give me up.
She did not. My mom, if nothing else is a stubborn woman. She cried and asked god for a sign. She says a dove landed on the window then, and so she decided that this little baby would come home with them. It was sign that I was gift from god.
Dad was not as quick to accept this. He was angry, disappointed, and upset. He and Mom got into a big fight (I believe it was a few weeks after I came home) about me. I wasnāt doing anything. I was basically a vegetable baby, not kicking or squirming or anything. He was convinced that the doctors were right, and I was going to be that way forever. He was ready to leave Mom and me. He would take my sister and leave. Mom got so mad at him, told him I was his baby too and pushed me into his arms. This was the first time I actually looked at someone. Right into his eyes and locked on. He cried. He cried so much.
He never forgave himself for almost leaving. I knew growing up that I was āthe favouriteā, even though I didnāt know why for a long time. When Mom told me the story it made sense.
None of my siblings know this story. Iām not sure if I should tell them? Iām pretty sure Dad is still ashamed of it. I canāt hold it in forever though, so I am writing here, on the internet where people may or may not read it.
(Oh, thanks to a nurse friend of my Momās, she did a lot of physio and speech therapy and stuff with me at home, so I actually turned out mostly good)
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