Scarlett @xscarfoxx - Tumblr Blog

Hello sir. You are looking dangerously attractive right now.

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oldergod-deactivated20191130

it looks like edward is trying not to sneeze and they’re shouting random words at him to help it go away

hatussy

psa: any large gatherings will result in a further spread of the virus. 🎇 happy fourth 🎆

savannahsdrabbles

It’s always my favorite character

feyrealms

I agree john mulaney is probably an immortal akin to beings such as keanu reeves and jeff goldblum but he’s like a new born baby immortal who is looking at the long long expanse of a lifetime he has in front of him and is already tired

newtgeiszler

jeff golblum is thousands of years old and loving it. john mulaney was born in 1901 and ever since 1924 it’s gone downhill for him

wombatking

So to be clear, the immortal timeline seems to be:

John Mulaney - early 20th century

Eric Andre - Probably 17th century or so.

Taika Waititi - Elizabethan age, probably hung out with Shakespeare

Keanu Reeves - We think sometime around Alexander the Great, but he seems to have just sprung up fully formed.

Jeff Goldblum - 100% Biblical times, may or may not be King Solomon.

Tommy Wiseau - Indeterminate, may be the first Homo Sapiens.

strangehorse

this is david lynch erasure

hubblegleeflower

Who are the female immortals?

artisanbloodbank

Jenny Slate - Jazz Age Darling, bffs with Alice Roosevelt

Helena Bonham Carter - Refused an invitation to dine with Queen Victoria based on her treatment of the Irish

Lucy Liu - ran away from home to join Ching Shih, 19th century Pirate Queen’s crew. Was considered too soft for fighting and was given an accordion

Bjork - 14th century Icelandic healer accused of witchcraft, also possibly a selkie

Whoopie Goldberg - present during the Conquest of Constantinople but don’t bring it up around her, it’s too fresh in her mind

Tilda Swinton - found sleeping in a peat bog. Carbon dating inconclusive

tamjador-deactivated20231120

this is blatant cher erasure

aces-and-anime

Cher isn’t immortal - she can just turn back time

tracing-rivers

Are we forgetting that Anne Hathaway was very openly married to Shakespeare?

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valtsv

indigobrea

Has anyone else seen this yet??

incorrect-gifs

I miss assassin couple (x)

whitepeopletwitter

obsessedwithfictionalmen01

If this isn’t the face of a man who is about to stab his brother for the 178383848th time then I don’t know what it is

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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bassiter

while looking up 1950s slang, i found the phrase “come on snake, let’s rattle,” which has 2 meanings: asking someone to dance, and challenging someone to a fight

and. hhhooooooooo boy does that fact have some Potential

steampunkepsilon

Invite your crush to the dance floor, but instead they just fuckin deck you

fysebastianstan

sebastian via istagram stories (may 9th, 2020)

everythingfox

“Sheep discovers how to use a trampoline”

(via)

comparingmeerkats

tempestaurora

sebastian stan playing christmas music and yelling "2021!" and just skipping the rest of 2020 is a whole mood and that is the kind of energy I'm gonna bring to 2021, merry christmas everybody

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

mjalti

daddy issues make u a people pleaser but mommy issues make u like. a sociopath

kakyoiin

tikkety-tok

emi--rose

No one could have possibly predicted this

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