WTF Bad Science Fiction Covers

One could be forgiven for thinking the title of this book is “Anal Take”.

https://www.amazon.com/Final-Take-Roger-Russell-ebook/dp/B01CRIW4GK/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1474996583&sr=8-5&keywords=final+take

This has all the elements of a bad romance cover but apparently it is Science Fiction…. Can you survive having a tiny building through your head?

This blog will be on hiatus until...

1. Someone takes over so I only need to post once a week.

or

2. My snarked out brain miraculously recovers.

Can you spot the spelling mistake?

*sniffs book deeply*... Smells like teen spirit.

Is that Chuck Norris?

It's not the unicorn playing chess that I object to, but the smug douche bag he's playing against.

Also: What’s up with the towel over the unicorn’s shoulder?  Is he the barkeep and that’s for “cleaning” the glasses?  If so how does he do that with hooves? Maybe he’s just keeping it there so he can surrender?

“Man, I told you to be careful with infinity. This is why we can’t have nice things.”

Happy FREAKY ROBOT LOVE Friday!

I’m not sure what a bikini girl robot, a skeleton and a constipated looking black mask with a noose around his neck is doing in a haunted Italian mansion but, I have to admit, I’m curious.

There’s one! Someone write this down! Shouldn’t we be, like, charting these?

diy-did-i:  It was pretty easy to tell which rocket the former Nazi scientists had designed...

As you can see, SprocketMan carries a Captain America-type shield made from bicycle sprockets. Ironically, as the city's defender of bicycle safety, he is portrayed riding his own bike one-handed while wielding this heavy hunk of metal.

Screw any “revelations”, I have a few questions...

How the frack did he get dirty like that? Does he work as a mechanic when he’s not shooting zombies? Or is he a zombie? Do zombies normally wear pleated camouflage pants? Why does he wear his sunglasses at night? So he can, so he can keep track of the visions in his eyes? And what does that mean? Is that a Zombie thing, a Zombie Hunter thing or just the fucked up lyrics to a Corey Hart song that makes no more sense to me as an adult as they did to me as a child?

“What the frak is my stupid sister doing now?! God, I hate her! Always trying to get attention. Last week it was that unfortunate pop rocks incident and now she's going all DaVinci on me with her latest flying contraption. It never ends! Even the birds are embarrassed for her. She's looking at me, isn't she, seeing if I notice? Don't look at her - you'll only encourage her. Contemplate my gorgeous blond hair and furrowed brow instead.”   

So Pop’s people are from Jupiter?

Also, apparently Captain Buttondown, Space Ranger has quite the powerful maglight. I wonder if it came with the space Crocs he seems to be sporting.