as requested by anon. Feel free to change pronouns or anything else !
“It’s a love potion! What could possibly go wrong?”
“My broom needs to be taken to the mechanic again.”
“If ___ only knew the kinds of things I could do to him/her/them…”
“I’m only a witch, not a miracle worker.”
“Halloween is my aesthetic.”
“Where can a witch find some decent beetle eyes around here?”
“Please don’t tell me that you just sat on my wand.”
“Do you think this is Harry Potter or something?”
“You can’t just say a bunch of words that sound like Latin and expect to make magic.”
“What? No magic here. Just gals being pals.”
“Of course I’m a witch. I just don’t have green skin or face warts.” / “I really wish I looked like a cartoon witch. That would be awesome.”
“Stop putting your potion ingredients in the fridge!”
“Magic is a sophisticated craft. You can’t just say ‘pizza-us apparatus’.”
“I can’t believe that this spell is too advanced for me.”
“The only family I would marry into is the Addams family.”
“Look, I’m sorry I turned you into a toad.” / “If I had it my way, you’d still be eating flies.”
“What are you gonna do? Burn me at the stake?”
“Be nice to my familiar. Our souls are literally bonded.”
“How dare you accuse me of trying to sneak a potion into your food?!”
“We have to ask ourselves: what are magic’s limitations? Like, can it unburn my chicken nuggets?”
“Why would I clean when the dishes can do themselves?”
“Some people just don’t appreciate magic the way that they should.”
“I told you not to summon demons in the house!”
“I may be a witch, but at least I’m not a bitch.”
“Just because I do magic and find girls cute, I ‘dance with the devil’? No way! He owes me money, I’d never dance with him.”
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