Just started Fires Of Heaven again
As someone who was addicted to Street Fighter II as a kid and getting back into WoT, this was *chef's kiss*
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@wotrot
Just started Fires Of Heaven again
As someone who was addicted to Street Fighter II as a kid and getting back into WoT, this was *chef's kiss*

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Iâve been listening to the podcast @everybodyhatesrand and oh my god.
Quote from their transcript (Episode 20):
"He kind of reads, although his older â no he is the middle sibling I guess. Elayneâs youngest and Galadâs oldest, so Gawyn reads very much like a middle sibling here, holding the peace between the two extremes."
Oh my god. Why did it never sink in with me before that Gawyn is the middle child!!???
That explains so much! GAWYN HAS MIDDLE CHILD SYNDROME!
From wiki regarding middle child syndrome:
The oldest child may be dominant and conservative
The middle child may be cooperative and independent
The youngest child may be ambitious and privileged
OH SHIT THEY NAILED THE TRAKANDS.
Iâm currently re-reading scenes set in the White Tower for my fanart project, picking up little bits of information I missed initially, and Iâm starting to get the picture that from The Great Hunt to The Shadow Rising, Galad is going through his âGone Wildâ phase mostly off screen.
Indulge me for a moment. I think I can make a case for this.
Galad is a guy whose lived most of his life being a good son to his step mother and following all the rules, so heâs primed for rebellion against that life and just needs a change of circumstances and a little freedom to facilitate that rebellion.
He gets to go to the White Tower with his half brother and sister, two kids who sound like theyâve been muck ups their whole lives, and finally, heâs off Morgaseâs apron strings, and doing the right thing doesn't seem like so much fun anymore.
At the White Tower, Galad isnât there to fuck spiders. No, heâs there to try fucking Egwene. He hits on Egwene as soon as he meets her. Like, literally on their first meeting. Sheâs just hanging out with Elayne, and Galad thinks itâs cool to hit on his little sisterâs friends while mogging his bro Gawyn. Wtf dude.
Later, and arguably, he shows interest in Nynaeve too, since later Elayne has a thought wondering if Galad was still interested in everyoneâs favourite walking Braid Tuggerâ˘. Did something happen off camera? I think we see a bit of attempted flirtation from him when Nynaeve turfs G&G out of her room in the Acceptedâs quarters, because heâs trying to turn the charm on her after he hits on Egwene again, right in front of Nynaeve. Also infront of his little sister again. Fkn shameless.
I bet if Tinder existed in Tar Valon, Galad would be the guy swiping right on all the girls to see who he matches with, and then copy/pasting âsupâ to every one of them to find out who has low enough self esteem to reply to his lazy text. A looksmaxxing is fuckboi is still a fuckboi, Galad.
Then, after the girls are gone from the Tower in The Shadow Rising, we hear from Gawyn that Galad is heartsick Egwene is gone (she left him on read when he texted her âwydâ actually), and that heâs not coming to Warder training as often.
â...the last time he bothered to come to the yard.â (TSR, Chapter 17, Deceptions) Gawyn tells Min, so we know Galad is slacking off which is not doing the right thing at all.
THEN Galad goes and hits on Min, offering to take her to a dance and smiling at her, and we all know that when Galad smiles, it has this CHA +100 effect. Minâs impression is that heâs unaware of what heâs doing, but I disagree with her. Heâs tried that smile on Nynaeve, who withstood it because she is Nynaeveâ˘, and I bet heâs been trying that smile on plenty of girls at the White Tower because it gets him further than âsupâ.
And THEN we learn the reason Galad is slacking off training and allegedly âheartsickâ.
Heâs not. Heâs drunk. Gawyn thinks that Galad doesn't even get smashed on his birthday, but I think Gawyn doesn't know shit about what Galad's really been getting up to.
Sure, Gawyn knows his brother has been going out into Tar Valon and drinking in taverns with Whitecloaks. WHITECLOAKS! But Iâm going to assume our friend Dain Bornhald is there, and we all know he drinks like a high school English teacher on the weekends. So I bet heâs there just frat boying it up with Galad, and being a bad influence while Galad is ditching Warder school.
Valda, that predator epic level asshole, is there too and heâs busy grooming Galad to join his cult by giving him personally autographed propaganda and making him feel like a Special Boy, all while under the influence of alcohol, which Valda probably bought for him and got the bartender to serve doubles, but told Galad they were singles, so Galad gets white girl wasted.
And thatâs how this all ends, like many average university experiences, with Galad joining a cult and running away from home.
So thatâs my âGalad Gone Wildâ hypothesis.
Not Morgase Trakand using Tar Valonâs daycare service The White Tower to take her crap disaster kids off her hands for a few years to continue Andoran traditions.

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Slander for (almost) every kingdom
Iâm sure this isnât a new thought, but has anyone ever considered that Lews Therin Telamon was likely a total dick?
How many of the Forsaken went to the dark side because they hated this guyâs guts? The wot wiki says:
âDue to Lews Therin's power, envy overtook many of Lews Therin's greatest generals such as Tel Janin Aellinsar, Duram Laddel Cham, Barid Bel Medar, and potentially others who remain unknown and caused them to defect to the Shadow, shifting the war in favor of the Shadow.â
Yeah nah. Seems like too extreme a reaction to just be jealousy. If it was just one person, then sure, whatever, but itâs actually three and potentially more? That's a pattern. Whatâs the common denominator there? Yep. Itâs Lews.
This suggests to me Lews was probably an insufferable jerk and horrible to work under. I bet he was a micromanager too.
In terms of abandoning the Light to join the Shadow, I think we all need to remind ourselves that people donât leave bad jobs. They leave bad bosses.
And consider Lanfear's obsession with Lews? That kind of crazy-ex behaviour doesn't come from nowhere. I seriously doubt Lews was blameless in that relationship.
So if I was Rand, Iâd be mortified if I suddenly found out I was the reincarnation of a total asshole who pissed people off enough they quit the Light and went to the Shadow. He should probably go apologise to the Forsaken on Lewsâ behalf.
Of course I haven't done an extensive search of the literature to support this theory.
We know for sure that he was a misogynist (among other things, just about the only thing he ever says about Illyena besides her name is that she talks too much). Also either he was a huge dick or Latra was a darkfriend (or both), because nothing else explains the Fateful Compact.
I strongly suspect Lanfear's "crazy ex" behavior is explained partly by his having cheated on her with Illyena and then vice versa, but I have no basis for that other than Vibes. None of the other women forsaken seem to have specific beef with him, but they virtually all have legitimate grievances with a society that thought he was Just The Coolest, and that probably tells us something. The society that produced Greandal and Mesaana and Aran'gar and Semirhage, that made Lanfear willing to drill a hole in the fabric of reality for a shot at gender equality, looked at Lews Therin Telaman and went "that guy is the best, we should put him in charge of stuff". Also the society that used Chorra trees to just straight up drug virtually the entire urban population. Also the third age shows almost no overt homophobia, but Demandred thinks Aran'gar might get killed for being openly bisexual and I don't think that came out of nowhere.
Also he was a white, male, professor in the humanities so like, just statistically.
Yes! Omg yes! All of this! I love that you've got THEORIES to support my shitpost that's not really a shitpost but an arguably legitimate alternate reading of the character!
I've always felt there was something fishy about the Age of Legends.
The Trakand-Damodred-alâThor-Mantear kids
Rand to Galad: Yeah? Well, our mother abandoned you! Galad to Rand: And then you killed our mother when she gave birth to you. Elayne to Galad, defending Rand: Shut up. Youâre adopted. Galad to Elayne: Rand was adopted too. Rand to Galad: Oh yeah? Well Iâm banging your sister! Elayne to Rand: He is NOT my brother. Galad to Elayne: Half brother. I am not your half brother you mean, Elayne. And yes I am. So yes, he is banging my sister. Half sister, that is. Gawyn to Galad, doing the mental calculations: So your half brother is banging your half sister and that's not... y'know..? Galad to Gawyn: Correct. We share a birth mother. And my half brother killed our mother when she gave birth to him. Rand to Galad: Goddamnit, Galad! Stop saying that! Elayne, to nobody in particular but maybe everybody: Idiot.
Iâm sure this isnât a new thought, but has anyone ever considered that Lews Therin Telamon was likely a total dick?
How many of the Forsaken went to the dark side because they hated this guyâs guts? The wot wiki says:
âDue to Lews Therin's power, envy overtook many of Lews Therin's greatest generals such as Tel Janin Aellinsar, Duram Laddel Cham, Barid Bel Medar, and potentially others who remain unknown and caused them to defect to the Shadow, shifting the war in favor of the Shadow.â
Yeah nah. Seems like too extreme a reaction to just be jealousy. If it was just one person, then sure, whatever, but itâs actually three and potentially more? That's a pattern. Whatâs the common denominator there? Yep. Itâs Lews.
This suggests to me Lews was probably an insufferable jerk and horrible to work under. I bet he was a micromanager too.
In terms of abandoning the Light to join the Shadow, I think we all need to remind ourselves that people donât leave bad jobs. They leave bad bosses.
And consider Lanfear's obsession with Lews? That kind of crazy-ex behaviour doesn't come from nowhere. I seriously doubt Lews was blameless in that relationship.
So if I was Rand, Iâd be mortified if I suddenly found out I was the reincarnation of a total asshole who pissed people off enough they quit the Light and went to the Shadow. He should probably go apologise to the Forsaken on Lewsâ behalf.
Of course I haven't done an extensive search of the literature to support this theory.
Consider actually that Mat Cauthon is the asshole in the Mat Vs G&G fight.
So Gawyn approaches Mat all friendly and smiling, happy to meet another Emondâs Fielder, and asks politely after his heath since heâd heard Mat was sick from E&E (Egwene and Elayne.)
Mat has these sullen thoughts about if he should call Gawyn âMy lordâ since he had refused to give Elayne a title, and decides heâs not going to show proper respect to her brother either.
Galad asks if Mat is interested in learning the sword, making polite conversation, and the boys share a joke about Nynaeve being scary. Gawyn makes a suggestion that Mat might want to learn a little of the sword because itâs good for everyone to know that, then asks after his friend, Rand. Y'know. Polite making more friends chit chat.
Mat completely snubs swords and starts bragging about how he could take them on with a quarterstaff. He looks half dead, remember, because heâs been sick, and Gawyn tries to be polite about it by not challenging him on his bragging.
Mat, the little shit, takes umbrage with this! And because heâs been having a shit morning and is jealous that all the girls are ignoring him and looking at Galad, he decides to take his mood out on Elayneâs brothers. Oh, he tells himself the actual reason heâs doing it is for fun, but we know better. And heâs going to be a total dick about it and fleece the princes out of a couple of silver marks each. Heâs like a pool shark, scamming people out of money because he knows how good he is and they don't.
Gawyn is still trying to be nice, saying they can do it when heâs not so sick anymore, and Galad also points out it wouldnât be fair. He also doesnât want to piss Egwene off by potentially hurting one of her friends.
But Mat pushes the issue like a jerk. G&G clearly donât want to fight, but Mat isnât giving it up. He's the one pushing for a fight, not them.
Now here, Galad does get a little prickly, saying the wager is ridiculous and that Mat wouldnât have a chance against one of them, let alone two, but I think heâs still trying to deter Mat from what seems like foolishness and save him getting hurt. None of them want to fight a dude who looks half dead.
Hammar steps in, and they tell him also that it wouldnât be fair and that Mat has been sick. Gawyn even says thereâs no need for it. When Hammar pushes them into the fight, G&G look regretful. They donât want to fight, and I think thatâs what everyoneâs missing here (and I know Hammar wants to teach G&G and all the other little Warderlings a lesson here, but that's not the point).
Even when their teacher makes G&G fight, they still donât want to take the wager, because theyâre sure theyâll win and they donât want to take some country kidâs money. Their assumption that theyâll win here isnât important â but it is important to note that theyâll fight, but donât want Matâs money while Mat is being a shit saying he wants to take theirs.
Only when Hammar says heâll cover the bets do G&G finally agree, but theyâre not happy about it.
So I think weâre so blinded by Matâs Moment of Awesome beating the princes that we kind of overlook that he was a total dick in the lead up to the fight. Donât get me wrong â Mat was my favourite at this stage and I loved that he kicked their asses (this is one of my favourite parts in the series), but re-reading that chapter again, I canât help but think what a jerk he was. Gawyn especially was being so nice to him, and Mat has go to and start picking fights with boys who just want to be his friend so he could take their money! (and possibly gives Gawyn permanent brain damage in the process IYKYK).
This is like that alternative reading of the Karate Kid, in which Daniel is painted as the aggressor.
Matrim Cauthon, YTA.

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