L to the OG

this quarantine got me feeling like luke’s guy walker… trapped on dagobah with that gay little frog, help LOL!

I always wanted to fuck him tbh

you CANNOT be fucking the white pharaoh bro

knowing how it tends to go with male authors and their wives it was probably marge who wrote the odyssey

“jesse. i don’t know. WHAT would make you think that i would EVER sell you to one direction. really, just calm down and think about this logically, think about it. what would i possibly gain from selling you to one direction?? i don’t even know how one would get into contact with them. please, just take a moment and think—really think—about who WOULD be able to contact such a famous band. a man of high social standing, right?? a notable businessman, who—what?? this envelope of loose british pounds in my hand?? jesse, ive always had this—”