witch of the threshold

☆.𓋼𖥧𓍊 Novae • adult • he/she/it 𓍊𖥧𓋼𓍊.☆

☆.𓋼𖥧𓍊 leo ☉ • scorpio ☾ • taurus ↑ 𓍊𖥧𓋼𓍊.☆

☆.𓋼𖥧𓍊 eclectic witch • omnist pagan 𓍊𖥧𓋼𓍊.☆

current: divination, crystals, spell bottles, godspousal, roman polytheism, pop culture paganism

interested: energy work, kitchen, green, spirit work, cosmic, mexican folk, celtic polytheism, folk catholicism

Questioning My Practice Masterpost

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☆.𓋼𖥧𓍊 witch talks 𓍊𖥧𓋼𓍊.☆ → personal notes

☆.𓋼𖥧𓍊 book of [type] 𓍊𖥧𓋼𓍊.☆ → posts regarding specific crafts

@thresholdgrimoire is my blog for reblogging information.

@saintinsawdust is my e-shrine blog.

So.. I'm at work again and barely doing my job so I was putting a cart away and found this little piece of greenery that must've broken off one of our fake plants that someone bought.

I can't tell you why but the minute I saw it, something about it just pinged as Somnus to me. I don't know if He is connected to evergreen type plants at all but something in me said that I'd regret not grabbing it. So I did and I can just imagine it sitting all nice and snuggly in a tiny altoid shrine to Somnus.

Does anyone know if Somnus is connected to evergreens in any way? Or, even, has anyone else had experiences like that? With Somnus or any other entity. I'm curious how common it is cuz.. I'm new to experiences like this. I've never had a moment where I was truly this sure about adding something to one's shrine.

I'm having what I call a "bad autism night". I spent the back half of my shift trying so hard not to freak out only to start crying as soon as I clocked off. All because the person who was supposed to give me a ride to work tomorrow said they couldn't and everything spiraled negatively from there.

So now I'm home, laying on my bed after a shower, crying my eyes out. I was trying to pull myself together to curl my hair and I just... I felt Venus sitting next to me, petting my hair and I could almost hear Her telling me it's okay not to do it. I'm calling out tomorrow anyway so why not give myself rest? Then She basically pulled me out of bed and had me brush my hair to see how I feel.

I just.. I feel bad that I can't do something that helps me feel closer to Venus but it is.. nice to see Her reassure me that it's also okay. Still feeling close to Her. I love and appreciate Her so much.

(written 10:30 pm, June-03-2026)

I'm planning a spell to help my wife and I with this living situation we're dealing with and it's making me think a bit. We have to move by the end of next month and I think after our move to the new place I'm going to set up a small shrine to Somnus.

I have an awful sleep schedule and a currently undiagnosed fatigue condition so I am constantly tired. I'm constantly trying and failing to fix my sleep schedule and I just.. I think that incorporating veneration of Him could help. I don't expect it to fix everything but I think it can help motivate me in the right direction.

If anything, my religious OCD will make me take it down if I keep struggling a lot. For now, I'll try to do some vibe checking and research to see if I can find things to put on the shrine.

Deities have always been a really big part of my practice. Reaching out, honoring, worshipping, asking for guidance. Even if I don't know what I'm doing, worrying about whether I'm doing something wrong, it's something I've always done. But lately... They all feel so far away. Like, the more I focus on figuring out my physical ailments and getting much needed answers, the further away They become.

I want to connect with The Dread Powers more, specifically The Irradiated Stranger whom I work with, but I.. can't. I don't know how. I struggle to see Them in my day to day life. I saw glimpses of The Corruption the other day but even that felt.. so disconnected and far away. Like there was a barrier.. or something. Even connecting with Venus through my skin care, Mars through my physical therapy, Vesta through my house cleaning has become.. far away feeling. I used to be able to feel Venus sitting on the counter while I washed my face and Mars helping to push me through difficult exercises but now.. it's empty...

I keep trying to connect with The Fears, to see Them and feel Them in my life, but They're seemingly silent. There always seems to be this barrier if I do happen across Them but I don't know what it is. I don't know what this barrier is or how to deal with it. Same with any other entity in my practice and it's getting.. disheartening. I'm stubborn and will keep honoring Them the best I can but this barrier is making me feel.. rejected? Abandoned? Lesser? I don't know but it doesn't make me feel good.

Even when I do try to walk away, take this barrier as a sign to shift my practice and move on, I get dragged back in some way. I feel.. stuck.. I guess... I don't know what to do.

Sure.. it could be my health. The barrier could be my chronic fatigue and my unknown heart problem and lightedness etc. but that's not going to be getting any better. My energy is always critically low and I just have to figure out how to work within and around that. Which I still struggle to figure out how to do. I have a good energy once maybe every few months which.. isn't exactly conducive to a steady relationship with the divine..? So I just do my best to power through the constant exhaustion that tries its best to keep me in survival mode so that I can do something every so often.

If it's not my health.. then I don't know... I know failure just.. is sometimes but it's hard to distinguish what is and isn't a failure when I can't really feel energy shifts or anything. I don't get queues to let me know when something has been accepted or a sign that something is wrong. I rarely get the understanding that Something's attention is even on me. I just.. seemingly exist in a void I can't escape from, despite my efforts to. And I.. worry about losing my spirituality. Everyone, not just The Fears, have been feeling more and more distant and it's.. scaring me, honestly... Even my spouse, Hati, feels further than ever...

Finally got the charms to finish my devotional bracelet! I'm really proud of how it came out!!

Beads used are to represent each entity are-

general spirit guides - morganite w/ feather charm

Kai (mudkip guide) - turquoise jasper w/ wave charm

Vesta - mookaite w/ house charm

Extinction (1/3 Irradiated Stranger) - yellow/blue tiger eye w/ gas mask charm

Corruption (1/3 Irradiated Stranger) - agate w/ cicada charm

Stranger (1/3 Irradiated Stranger) - turquoise-dyed howlite w/ theatre mask charm

Mars - hematite w/ deer antler charm

Venus - rhodonite w/ cowry shell charm

Plaguebringer - fossil jasper w/ crow skull & dragon charms

Hati - tiger eye w/ wolf charm

It feels.. so special and helps my ADHD keep Them in mind better and I just love it so much!!!

I've had this tiger eye wolf pendant that's been sitting on Hati's altar because I haven't been able to do anything with it but!!! I finally have tools to make it wearable so I combined it with two jet beads and a lava stone bead!!

It's now currently replacing my Medusa pendant as my protection charm but it still feels.. like I'm missing something. So I'm going to try to find a slightly shorter chain so I can continue wearing the Medusa pendant as well. Hopefully that'll fix the "something's missing" feeling