Wild Juniper Bush

Two years ago today, May 12th, 2024, was the day that my trans egg cracked and I knew I was a woman. To celebrate, I made this little video, with words and audio taken directly from blog posts and vlogs I made at the time. It’s easy to focus on the hardships and ancillary difficulties we trans people face these days. But this video isn’t about those bits. This is about joy.

"The furies are at home in the mirror; it is their address. Even the clearest water, if deep enough can drown. Never think to surprise them.

Your face approaching ever so friendly is the white flag they ignore. There is no truce

with the furies. A mirror’s temperature is always at zero. It is ice in the veins. Its camera is an X-ray. It is a chalice

held out to you in silent communion, where gaspingly you partake of a shifting identity never your own."

It’s #TransgenderAwarenessWeek this week, and, well…I’m a little torn. As many of you know, I first found out I was trans about a year and a half ago (well, arguably: I had been exploring my gender identity as a concept for longer but it was then that I really pinned it down as “trans woman”). I have not been shy about sharing my journey online, especially after I came out publicly last June,…

What are you? This fundamental question is one that many of us have to confront every day. Most people don’t give it a second thought on a day-to-day basis; more often, the existential question is, “Who are you?” A doctor? A lawyer? A musician? A mother, father, son, daughter; a leader, a follower; a hero, a villain; a person whose life is entirely inconsequential, or a person who changes the…

August 31st, 2026. One year. One year until one of the riskiest, yet most important days of my entire life. One year until my scheduled bottom surgery (vaginoplasty). A lot of stars still have to align for this dream to actually become a reality. The political/medical/insurance situation has to remain stable long enough for my insurance to follow through on what it promised and cover the…

I made a new trans vlog! In this, my final recording before starting official trans voice training, I talk somewhat about identity, and how one's sense of self relates to their gender, and being able to see themselves in a mirror as the person they need to me. It's kind of meta.

Also being trans is not a mental illness!

Being a trans woman means feeling about twenty different things about this photo, and this is the life I have… So I bought this top a couple of weeks ago because I thought it was really cute and also brown is one of my colors. I was thinking of wearing it to a get-together I’ve got in a couple of weeks. However, when I first put it on I had a bunch of conflicting feelings about it hit me all at…

Some days are wonderful and grand. Some are non-descript. Some are emotional and raw. This post is the latter. I banged these out in a Notepad file without even looking at the screen while typing (hence the spelling errors) when I felt compelled to after a few days when I was spiraling a bit. I don’t know why I felt the need to share them, but here they are anyway. Hopefully you can get something…

(note: the title of this post contains a deliberate misspelling because I don’t need Praeger U to get more SEO than it already has. In fact, I’m going to keep misspelling the name because fuck them.) The other day, a friend of mine alerted me to something he found while scrolling through Facebook. At first he thought it was a video of mine from TikTok that I had reposted on Facebook, but then…