How do you FEEL about the NEW 6th love interest, Valko?
Hotđ„
Awoooo-gađș
Midđ«€
Should've stopped at Calebđâ€ïž
Honestly Don't Care đ„±
What's up with the Eng Voice đ€
Looks like Caleb & Sylus w/Red Hair đ€š
Finally Something New đ đ„ł
It's a Furry Loca! đŸâïž
Voting ended onJun 29
I wanted to see people first impression of the guy before we actually get to "meet" him. Im gonna be honest I woke up and busted out laughing upon opening up insta, I just cant lol
If you have your own opinions pls leave them in the comments I'd love to read them
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
I cannot believe there's absolutely no way to watch free shows and movies anymore, there are too many paid streaming platforms and pirating websites have viruses and ads preventing you from watching it uninterrupted((.)) id rather follow the rules and purchase media moving forward because it is too inconvenient. Seriously, free and no ads or viruses with 1080p streaming is DEAD.
Exactly! It's freaking annoying when I want to watch movies but I would have to subscribe to like 24 different services . Just to watch the shows that I like.
i like using streaming apps but there are waaaay too many and they're all stealing my data .i wish there was a secure and organized way to have millions of shows and movies available one one app. but alas. we've truly gone full circle back to cable + now it spies on you. its a real shame. i dont want to fill my device storage with tons of boring and stupid cash grabs.
i know, it's so annoying for everything to be paid nowadays, especially movies and tv shows. it would be perfect if i could watch them without getting infected by some virus or some shit. i'm fine with ads, they gotta run themselves somehow, but i want to watch stuff and .live! if they have to use different domains i'm okay with that too, because free media is .top dog either way.
for mobile users, it especially sucks, because you can't just use websites and you have to not only pay, but you have to download a billion apps just to find what the thing you wanna watch is on. it doesn't help that the streaming services take up...so much space. so much.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
â--- summary: Your childhood best friend, Zayne, had always been there for you, loyal, supportive, and understanding. So, when you realized you had a crush on Caleb, you turned to him for help. Taking it upon himself to be your guide, Zayne offered to teach you a few lessons in love. But as the lessons progress, you start to wonder... was Caleb really the one you wanted all along?
â--- word count: 9.9k
â--- warnings: mdni, oral sex, fingering, missionary, zayne is literally so jealous, caleb is kinda the boy best friend you tell your boyfriend not to worry about ngl, reader is inexperienced, soft!dom zayne, size kink if you squint, zayne knows you so fucking well it's sickening (he's just so sweet), no protection is used (wrap it before you tap it)
â--- a/n: loosely based on nightly rendezvous (yes im doing a childhood best friend au for everyone... i fear im obsessed)
âł xavier | sylus | caleb | rafayel
Some part of you felt like it was a bad ideaâyou knew better. Even after all these years, it felt surreal that Caleb was one of your closest friends. In your small town, there werenât many people to bond with. The tight-knit community had shrunk over time, and most people you knew were just memories now. But youâd never forget the two boys who lived next door. One was more charming, the other more reserved, but both were just as kind and reliable.
Years later, that sense of community felt like a distant dream. It was why you jumped at the chance to move closer to Caleb and Zayne after they relocated to the city. The passing of your grandmother had made staying in the countryside unbearable. But as you stood ankle-deep in snow, staring at the truck piled high with your belongings, you wondered if you were in over your head.
The cold wind bit through your gloves as you trudged inside the apartment building. Your eyes darted nervously to the heavy furniture that needed to be moved. You shifted your weight, glancing at the door every few seconds. If any of the boys decided not to show up, you would be screwed.Â
âY/N!â Calebâs voice rang out, and your head snapped up. Relief surged through you as you saw him approaching. Without thinking, you rushed into his arms, your cheeks burning as his warm embrace enveloped you.
âItâs good to see you too,â he teased, his playful grin tugging at the corners of his lips. His hands rested lightly on your back as he pulled away, studying your face. âHow long were you standing out there?â
âNot long,â you lied with an awkward laugh. âI justâgot lost in thought.â
How he looked at you made it hard to breathe, as if he still saw the same girl from all those years ago. The creak of the lobby door saved you from spiraling further.Â
Zayne strode in, his dark coat dusted with snowflakes. His sharp gaze flicked from you to Calebâs hands, still resting on your waist. For a moment, his jaw tightened, but he quickly smoothed his expression.
âYouâre late,â Caleb called out, smirking.
âIâm here now, arenât I?â Zayne replied, his tone dry as his eyes settled on you. âI almost thought you forgot about me.â
âNever,â you said with a grin, stepping forward to hug him. His arms wrapped around you briefly, his touch warm but hesitant. You smiled before turning and walking over to the elevator. You missed your family, and now it felt a little closer to being pieced back together.Â
You gave a debrief of the plan for the day, as there was plenty you could do on your own later. Though you were grateful to Xavier for helping you get a place, it neededâŠtlc. The boys agreed to help you move bulky items and clean up the remnants of a bug treatment.Â
The boys retreated to the lobbyâthey had to move a couch and some other, far too heavy things. The three of you had been friends for years, bickering and fighting like siblings, but never with ill intent. Though Caleb and Zayne constantly teased each other more recently than anything, you werenât sure what was a joke anymore.Â
Your body jolted. A sound of a shout came from the hallway, distracting you from sweeping.Â
âDamnâZayne, pull up the couchââ Caleb strained and bit out.Â
âYouâre the one whoâs not paying attention,â Zayne shot back calmly.Â
You walked up to the unfolding scene, your hands resting on your hips when you approached them. The couch was now on the tile of the apartment hallway. You were glad they didnât break your stuff while they messed around.
âAnd⊠Why is my couch on the ground?â you asked, your gaze shooting between them.Â
âIt seems Calebâs grip slipped,â Zayne quipped. You could feel the air quotes around the last portion of his statement. His hands were resting on his hips as his breathing slowed and evened out.
âI just need a secondâIâm sweating over here,â Caleb said, a deep breath coming from his lips.Â
You watched as he lifted his shirt. His jeans rested low on his hips as he lifted the fabric, you could see faint trails of hair leading down his abdomen. He had a vein running above his hip to below his pants.Â
Your eyes betrayed you as you shamelessly traced his body. Fuck, he looked good.
Zayne watched you in silence, observing, watching the surprise on your face when Caleb lifted his shirt. And he did not like it. First, why did Caleb always do shit like that, but besides, why did you seem to like it so much.
The three of you worked together to tackle the chaos of the moving day. With the bulky items moved, Caleb helped you clean the kitchen while Zayne focused on the living room. You stood on your tippy toes, wiping the cabinet the best you could, stretching to reach the top shelf. Caleb moved in behind you, his body brushing against yours.Â
âLet me get that,â he said, his voice soft as he grabbed the cloth from your hand.
Your breath hitched as his warmth seeped through your back. His fingers brushed yours briefly, sending a jolt through you. You moved aside, trying to compose yourself. He stepped to the side after finishing, leaning onto the counter, âWhy donât I take over this part, since youâre so small?â a playful grin played on his lips, as he winked at you.Â
âAlways picking on my size,â you joked, your voice shaky. âMaybe youâre just too tall.â
His grin widened, but something in his gaze lingered a moment too long. â...Maybe,â he murmured, his voice low.
From the corner of the room, Zayneâs gaze flicked toward the kitchen. His hand paused mid-swipe on the wall, his eyes narrowing at seeing Caleb leaning close to you. His grip on the rag tightened, but he quickly looked away. This wasnât the time.
You noticed all his progress when you made your way to Zayne. He almost successfully cleared the living room. âCan I help?â you said, approaching his side.Â
Zayneâs lips quirked into a slight smirk. âI figured youâd be too busy with Caleb to remember me.â
âWhy does everyone keep saying that?â you shot back, an uncomfortable laugh leaving your lips.
He attached the extended handle before handing you the mop, his fingers brushing yours slightly. âGuess Iâll have to remind you why Iâm the favorite,â he said, his tone light but his eyes serious.Â
â
You fell into a routine in the following weeks, trying to adjust to your new life. Weekly meetups with Caleb became a ritual, and today, you waited for him at a quaint coffee shop Zayne had introduced you to. The warm smell of coffee and pastries filled the air as you spotted Caleb walking in, his black coat framing his tall figure.
âY/N!â he called out, his smile lighting up. He hugged you tightly, lifting you off the ground for a moment.
When he set you down, his eyes held yours for a beat too long. Your stomach flipped as you sat across from him, trying to steady your thoughts.
You began your catch-up over a coffee and some food. Your discussion filled the silence, and you shared a laugh while discussing the latest work drama. You clued Caleb into the details about your coworker, and how the Hunterâs Association locked his file.
It was pretty peculiar in your field; most hunters had a public record, released by the organization they resided under, but in his case, it wasnât as easily accessible, making him a high-profile individual. Which just made you curious. As talented as you were you couldnât help but notice the difference in skills between the two of you. It was so obvious heâd been at this longer than you.Â
Caleb listened intently as you shared the latest work news, his fingers tracing the rim of his coffee cup.
âAnd what are you going to do about it?â he asked, his voice teasing. âDetective work?â
You shook your head, biting your lip. âI donât know. It feels like Iâd be invading his privacy. I guessâIâll wait for him to tell me when heâs ready.â
Calebâs gaze softened. âThatâs just like you,â he said quietly, his purple eyes glinting in the light.
Before you could process his words, your watch buzzed with an alarm. âI gotta get back to work,â you said, grabbing your things in a rush.
âIâll take care of this,â he said, gesturing to the table. âSee you later.â
It was a lighter cold today, and no heavy snow blocked your path. As you walked back to work, you were honestly heavy in thought. You couldnât stop thinking about Caleb. His smiles and touches felt deliberate, and you had no idea how to handle it. Dating had always been a mystery to you, and your nerves werenât helping. Â
This wasnât the first time these nerves graced your presence. When you were much younger, you recall the party, the smell of alcohol, the loud music, and unfamiliar faces. You knew Zayne and Caleb of course, but them being a bit older than you made this crowdâone you hadnât been exposed to before.
Making your way through the door was the worst. Caleb knew everyone, saying âhellos,â âhiâs,â and âwhatâs up, dude,â as he led the way. Making your way through the moving bodies was a challenge. You were thankful for Zayneâs hand holding onto yours as you made the way. You scanned the crowd, and everyone was dancing. The number of people grinding on others was mesmerizing, and you wanted in.
The music thudded through the walls, pounding against your ears. You remember making your way up the stairs, following closely behind Caleb, as Zayne sandwiched in behind you, finally letting go of your hand. Honestly, this didnât seem like Zayneâs type of crowd, and he wasnât the most outgoing.Â
When you reached the room, it had fewer people than the rest of the house. You walked in, sitting on the couch while Zayne stood near the corner of the room. Some people sat in a circle with a bottle in the center, obviously playing a game. One of the girls asked if you and the boys wanted to join.Â
You could feel the eyes of two important men in your life shift to you. Both were curious about your response.Â
â...yeah.âÂ
Caleb also joined the game, sitting directly across from you. A girl with blonde hair spun the bottle, and before you knew it, it was your turn.Â
Placing your hand on the bottleneck, you spun the bottle, watching its turning motion with curiosity. When it stopped on Caleb, the purple of his eyes glinted as he looked between you and the bottle.Â
You could hear the circle of people urging you both on. It was just a kiss. You could do this. Heâs your friend. You sat up on your heels, your hands burning as they rested on your knees.Â
He got close to you and whispered, âReady?â only for your ears to hear, and he kissed you, his lips connecting with yours softly, sweetly. Some people teased him for the gentleness at which his lips touched yours, but something shot through you when his lips touched yours. He softly bit your bottom lip before he pulled back from you.Â
He kissed you. Zayne saw, everyone saw, and you liked it.Â
You needed adviceâsomething solid to guide your next move. Youâd already admitted to yourself that you liked him, but how were you supposed to approach this? What did you even say? Zayne helped you through that kiss, reminding you it was just a game. But all these years later, you wanted to be more than a game to Caleb. Even in your shared youth, he had good advice for you, so why wouldnât you trust him?
When you arrived at the office, your mind was still a tangled mess, buzzing with uncertainty. You decided it was no use overthinking it; it was better to rip the bandaid off.
You pulled out your phone, hesitating for a moment before texting Zayne:
You:
âCan I call you? I need some advice.â
When his reply came moments laterââI have a patient right now. Iâll call you after.ââyou let out a relieved sigh. You trusted him, and you needed his help.
Relief washed over you as you read his reply, your heartbeat finally slowing to a steady rhythm. You let out a soft sigh, tucking your phone away. All you had to do now was organize your thoughts.
While you waited, you turned to your caseload, focusing on the profile youâd been compiling for a new wanderer-type youâd encountered during a hunt weeks earlier. Using old files as templates, you typed furiously, the steady rhythm of the keyboard pulling you into the zone. Minutes turned to hours as you worked, the world fading into the background.
The buzzing of your phone jolted you back to reality. You glanced at the screen and barely caught the call before it went to voicemail.
âYou want me to teach you how to date?â Zayneâs voice drawled through the line, laced with amusement.
Heat rushed to your face as you groaned audibly. âThatâs notâitâs not like that!â you blurted, but Zayne only chuckled softly.
You spent the next ten minutes stumbling through your explanation, your words tangling as you tried to paint a coherent picture of your situation. When you finally stopped, waiting anxiously for his response, all he said was:
âOkay.â
That one word was enough to knock the wind out of you. âOkay?â you repeated, your voice barely above a whisper.
âOkay,â he confirmed calmly.
Your heart soared. âOkay, then,â you echoed quickly, trying to mask your nervous excitement. You rushed to thank Zayne before ending the call, clutching the phone to your chest. Relief and joy bubbled inside you. You knew Zayne would come through for you. You trusted him completely.
On the other end of the call, Zayne set his phone on his desk, his lips quirking into a faint smirk. He began packing up for the day, shaking his head in amusement. The idea of you coming to him for dating advice was equal parts endearing and intriguing.
Of course, he would help you. That much was never in question. But who had caught your interest so suddenly? The thought gnawed at him, tempting him to ask outright, but he resisted. Heâd figure it out eventually.
As he picked up his phone to draft a response, a quiet laugh escaped him. âLessons,â he murmured, the word rolling off his tongue with amusement. He couldnât help but smirk as he began typing out a plan. Lessons in dating and seduction? If anyone was going to help you succeed, it was him.
â
Your phone buzzed with details for your first lesson. You had to admit you were quite excited. When you open the message, you read simple instructions:
Zayne:
âIâll pick you up at 7 pm. Wear something nice, but comfortable.âÂ
A quiet scoff escaped your lips as you gripped your phone, its cool metal grounding youâway to give me nothing, Zayne. Still, you couldnât help the small smile tugging at your lips as you typed back.
You:
âGot it.âÂ
With a rare day off, you had more than enough time to overthink this dateâor, well, lesson. You'd been on dates before, but this felt differentâimportant. You wanted to impress Caleb later, but you also wanted to enjoy this with Zayne and learn from him.
Determined, you took your time getting readyâa long bath, smooth and refreshed skin, natural hairstyle, skipping the heat of flat irons. Your makeup was subtle, accentuating your best featuresâyour eyes and lips. The outfit? Simple, with an effortless elegance: a black skirt, a beige sweater, and knee-high black boots. Something nice but comfortable, you echoed mockingly in your head.
The doorbell rang. Your pulse quickened. Taking a deep breath, you cracked the door open.
âIâm grabbing my bagâgive me a sec,â you said quickly before shutting it again.
Zayne chuckled softly on the other side. You looked nervous, and he thought it was cute.
When you finally stepped out, his eyes swept over you, approval flashing in his gaze. âReady?â His voice was warm, familiar.
You swallowed, heat rushing to your cheeks. âYeah.â
Locking up, you stepped beside him, weaving through the apartment halls. The elevator was packed when it arrived, leaving just enough room for the two of you to squeeze in. When the doors slid shut, the crowd's pressure pushed you toward the back corner of the elevator.
Zayne stepped in after you, his body instinctively blocking the others from pressing too close. His warmth enveloped you, a wall of quiet protection. When his chest brushed against yours, your head shot up, startled by the contactâonly to knock it against the cold metal wall behind you.
A low groan slipped from your lips, and Zayne chuckled. âCareful.â His hand came up, cupping the back of your head gently.
You stilled. Zayneâs touch was light but steady, fingers warm against your scalp. You let yourself settle into it for just a second, your cheeks heating.
Then, with a soft ding, the doors slid open. The moment was gone.
You followed him out quickly, slipping into his car. The silence was thick but not uncomfortable. Still, you were the first to break it.
âSo⊠where are we going?â you asked, anticipation bubbling beneath your skin.
Zayneâs grip tightened subtly around the gear shift, veins visible against his skin. His lips curled into a faint smile. âYouâll see.â
â
You hadnât expected this.
The setup was breathtakingâcandles flickering softly, a picnic blanket spread on the grass by a lake, and wildflowers scattered around like natureâs own confetti. The crisp spring air carried the scent of earth and blooming petals, a reminder that winterâs grasp was finally loosening. The sun had just begun its descent, casting everything in golden light.
Zayne stood behind you, watching. He caught how your breath hitched and how awe softened your features. The faint flush that always seemed to bloom when he was near. He reveled in it.
âLesson one,â he murmured. âA date.â
You turned to him, eyes wide. âZayne, this isâŠâ Your voice wavered with something close to wonder. âThis is perfect.â
A small, knowing smile touched his lips.
You hesitated. âIâve never reallyââ You exhaled. âSo⊠what do we do now?â
He motioned for you to sit. âFirst? We eat.â
You obeyed, watching as he unpacked the meal. Your gaze flickered over the assortment of sweets tucked beside the entrees, and you bit your lip. He remembered your sweet tooth.
Your heart squeezed.
He handed you a sandwichâone of your childhood favorites. You took a bite, savoring the familiar flavors and the quiet thoughtfulness behind it.
The evening unfolded like something out of a dream. The conversation was easy and flowing, as it always was between you two. You talked about everything and nothing, letting the city fade away, and the wine in your glass disappeared far too quickly.
At some point, you made the mistake of looking at him.
The sunset bathed him in amber light, the gentle hues accentuating the sharp cut of his jaw and the faint green specks in his eyes. He looked beautifulâeffortlessly so. The sleeves of his powder blue dress shirt rolled up, revealing strong forearms, veins pronounced as his fingers idly toyed with the rim of his glass.
His gaze lifted, catching yours.
You panicked. Tipped your head back, draining the last of your wine, pretending to admire the sky.
And so the night went on.
Laughter. Warmth. The kind of company that made the world feel a little less lonely. It had been too long since youâd felt this way.
Maybe that was whyâ
âwhy you ended up tipsy.
The last thing you remembered clearly was Zayneâs hands on your waist, steadying you as you stumbled at your door. His voice, amused and gentle, coaxing you inside.
And thenâ
"You're drunk."
His voice was strained.
Your skin burned. âN âm not,â you murmured, reaching up, fingers clumsily ruffling his hair. âI wânted to kiss you, Z-ZayneâŠâ
His breath hitched.
You wobbled onto your tiptoes, pressing a sleepy, featherlight kiss to his cheek. âGânight, Zayne~â
Darkness.
And thenâmorning.
Your head throbbed. You groaned, pressing your palm to your forehead, and thenâ
The memory came rushing back.
Your stomach dropped.
Shit.
What did you do?
You kissed Zayneâjust a kiss on the cheek, but no less a kiss. And you didnât know how you felt about it. Maybe you liked it. And when you checked your phone, your heart skipped a beat.Â
Zayne:
âAre you feeling better?â
It was a simple question, but your body felt warm, and a smile tugged at your lips as the cold metal burned your hand.Â
You:
âYes, Iâm still a bit warm, but much better :)â
And from there the conversation flowed.Â
Zayne:Â
âSo youâre ready for your next lesson?â
You:
âDuh.â
â
This lesson was set up differentlyâas a more casual experience. Zayne held the door open, allowing you to enter as the scent of perfumes and faint traces of liquorâsomething you planned to avoid tonightâfilled your senses.
Zayne trailed closely behind you, his eyes drawn to your fitted black dress. It hugged your curves just right, and while you were always beautiful, tonight, you looked divine. His gaze lingered, but he didnât say a word, instead committing the image to memory.
You settled into the plush velvet seat, crossing your legs as you waited for him to join you. The slight pressure of the fabric against your skin and the low hum of jazz music set a tone of subtle sophistication.
âLesson two,â he murmured as he sat beside you. âBody language.â
A sly smile crept onto your lips. This time, you were ready. Beyond your carefully chosen outfit, you had mentally prepared to hold your ground. Tonight, you would stay in control.
âSo, whatâs the plan today, Zayne?â you drawled, leaning forward as your fingers lightly brushed his bicep. You pretended it was a casual touch, but the way his muscles flexed beneath your fingertips sent a jolt through you.
Zayne tilted his head slightly, studying your face. A flicker of amusement danced in his eyes. âYouâre already ahead, princess,â he whispered, his voice low. The words felt like a direct hit to your resolve.
Your breath hitched, and for a moment, your lips parted as you scrambled to regain composure. âHead start?â you echoed, tilting your head and trying to sound nonchalant.
"I want to see what you've learnedâthink you can charm me?" he said simply.
The lounge was an upscale dream: dimly lit, lined with high-end paintings, and filled with the smooth rhythm of jazz. The swaying figures on the dance floor moved in tandem with the music, and for a moment, you let yourself get lost in the scene.
Leaning in closer to Zayne, you brushed your lips near his ear. âShould we dance?â you whispered, your hand steadying yourself on his knee.
The scent of his cologneâclean with a faint hint of jasmineâenveloped you. You felt his gaze sharpen, and when you pulled back slightly to meet his eyes, the faint green specks in them seemed to glow under the low light.
âShall we?â he asked, his voice smooth, as he stood and offered you his hand.
On the dance floor, your movements flowed easily, the music guiding you. You pulled him closer, and your body pressed flush against his. His hands rested on your lower back, firm and grounding, while your fingers trailed up his chest. The hard muscle beneath your touch sent a thrill through you.
âYou look so handsome tonight, Zayne,â you said softly, your lips curving into a small smile.
âOnly tonight?â he teased, the corners of his mouth lifting.
Your finger traced lazy patterns on his chest. His heartbeat was steady initially, but you noticed the slight quickening as your touch lingered. You looked up at him, your gaze filled with something unspoken but deeply felt.
âYou always do,â you whispered.
The air between you was charged, the tension pulling you closer. You could feel the heat radiating from his body, grounding you while simultaneously making you feel like you might float away.
When the tempo picked up, you spun away from him, creating a bit of distance as you swayed more freely. He matched your rhythm more stiffly than anything. You couldnât help but smileâthis was fun.
âYouâre way too stiff,â you said, getting close to him. Watching him try to whine his hips to the upbeat tempo was amazing. A laugh left your lips as your hands gripped his hips. âWhy are your feet so close together?!â you choked out.Â
âI was never a dancer,â he said flatly, unamused by the tears in your eyes.Â
âMove to the beat,â you said again, trying to show him the way, but he didnât get it. If you asked him, heâd rather watch you move your body. You moved beautifully, rolling your hips with precision.
When the lounge prepared to close, your cheeks ached from grinning, and your legs were deliciously sore. You shivered slightly as you walked side by side through the chilly night air.
âYou look cold,â Zayne said, shrugging off his jacket and draping it over your shoulders before you could protest.
The warmth of the fabricâand his scentâwrapped around you. A soft, rich aroma of jasmine and something distinctly him made your heart flutter.
You nudged his arm, a soft laugh escaping your lips. âYou know⊠I think this was the best night Iâve had in a long time.â
âI havenât danced like that in forever.â you said.
âHow could I forget?â he replied, his eyes briefly flicking to the stars above. âItâs your favorite thing.â
His fingers brushed against yours, tentative at first. You took the leap, intertwining your fingers with his. The warmth of his hand sent a pleasant shiver down your spine, and you caught the faint blush dusting his cheeks.
This man was everything.
â
Later That Week
You had agreed to meet Caleb for a more eventful hangoutâto meet downtown and do whatever caught your eye.Â
You spotted him easily. His tall figure towered over most people. You walked up to him, and he hugged you tightly. The warmth of his body covered yours, but it didnât raise your heartbeat.Â
When he loosened his grip on you, his hands rested on your shoulders, âLong time no see, pipsqueak,â he said, his voice full of joy.Â
Your cheeks felt tight from smilingâyou were happy to see him, but not for the same reasons as before.
âI know, itâs been a few weeks,â you said, pulling back from him and looking into the purple of his eyes. âLetâs get back on schedule,â you breathed, a light smile plastered on your lips.Â
Work had been busy, but the truth was that your lessons with Zayne had occupied your thoughtsâand your time.
While you started your walk downtown, plenty of things caught your eye. The first thing you did was enter a record shop. The store was in the basement off of a side street. It was a little creepy, but it looked like an underground studio once you got inside. Records were all over the shop, on the wall, and in little baskets stacked in rows.Â
He browsed next to you, shuffling through the records occasionally showing you one he thought youâd like or an album youâd enjoyed. And in spending this time with him, you realized that you enjoyed this.Â
The simplicity between you, the light air, and the lack of expectations for anything more was all you needed. Calebâs fingers softly brushed yours as he placed a vinyl behind the one you held up for him.
âFind anything good?â you asked, your feet planted evenly on the ground as you turned to face Caleb.Â
His eyes bore into yours, something flickering over them before he answered you.
 âNahâlet's get some food,â he said quickly, his demeanor suddenly returning.
Exiting the store, you joined in step beside him, exploring the city's night scene. Your options were endless as you scanned the shops that lined the streets. You spotted a food truck and the smells coming from it were amazing.Â
Altering Caleb, you both sat at the outdoor seating, waiting for your orders. The chill of the evening air seeped through your clothes, making you shiver slightly.
âDo you want my jacket?â Caleb asked, his tone playful. âYou look like youâre freezing.â
âOnly if you have an extra,â you said, bouncing your leg under the table to keep warm.
With a smirk, he reached into his bag and handed you a spare coat. âYouâre my best friend, You know I always do.â
You slipped it on, grateful for the warmth but⊠that was it. There was no spark, no flutter of excitement. You tried to convince yourself otherwise, adjusting the collar and wrapping it tighter around yourself, but it felt like just a jacket.
In the quiet moment that followed, your mind drifted back to Zayne. His jacket had enveloped you in warmth and scent, and your heart raced when he was near. You glanced at Caleb, who was busy watching the street outside.
Nothing. That kiss wasâjust a kiss. Years ago, you wouldnât have believed anyone. Not even Zayne could have convinced you it was a fleeting crush. But it really was. You felt proper chemistry, companionship, and care and wanted to keep experiencing that with Zayne.
The weight of your realization was crushing. All the time you spentâwasted on this man. You cared for him, you truly did. But, what about you? Why were you so pent-up and focused on this person you didn't even really like? Was it really him you missed? Or just how he filled your time and made you feel smallâsafe, even?
That's the point. Youâre not small. You're a grown woman who can stand independently, make her own decisions, and provide her own entertainment. Relief washed over you in waves because what were you even doing? Holding onto a version of the past that no longer fits?
But right behind it, sadness crept in. Not for Caleb, but for the time lostâchasing something never meant to be yours. But you didnât truly waste time if it led you hereâto someone real. To Zayne.
You forced a smile, staring down at your lap, and tried to push away the sinking feeling in your chest. You used to admire Caleb. It should feel special, especially his attention and time, butâit doesnât.Â
Caleb was the person you had wantedâthe reason for the lessons.
The contrast was stark, undeniable. And for the first time, you realized the answer had been clear.
â
You had admitted to Zayne that you wanted a cozy evening. Work had drained you, but more than anything, your recent realization had knocked the wind out of you. It wasnât just an idle thoughtâthe truth that settled deep in your bones, undeniable yet terrifying.
You knew what you needed to say and do, but the effort of voicing itâof being honest with Zayneâmade your nerves coil tight.
Your lessons have helped. You felt more confident, more self-assured. You understood what a date was supposed to be now, what it meant to be courted and wanted. But more than anything, you wanted something real.
With him.
So, he invited you over after work.
Zayne:
"How about I cook you dinner, and we watch a movie?"
You:
"How do you always know exactly what I need?"
âŠ
Zayne:
"Make yourself at home. I just finished setting up."
When you arrived at his house, the living room instantly warmed you. The room glowed softly from the candles he had lined along the tables, their flickering light casting gentle shadows against the walls. The scent of something rich and savory drifted from the kitchen, mingling with the faint traces of his cologne.
But the sight of something familiar made your heart catch in your chestâsmall plushies, the ones you had won years ago, still resting on the couch.
He had kept them.
Your fingers grazed one absentmindedly as you took it all in, a lump forming in your throat.
You didnât miss the sound of the shower running from the other room, and heat bloomed across your face. The thought of him stepping outâsteam rising, droplets tracing the planes of his skinâsent your mind spiraling. He had just gotten off work, yet he still made time to set everything up for you.
As if on cue, the water stopped. A moment later, the door cracked open, and Zayne walked out, a towel slung low on his hips, another in his hands as he ruffled it through his damp black hair.
âDonât be a stranger,â he said casually, his voice smooth. âHave a seat.â
Then, as if completely unaware of his effect on you, he strode into his bedroom and shut the door with a soft click.
You swallowed hard. That lasted less than a second, but it was enough.
His physique was unrealâhis lean yet defined frame, the way his skin still glistened slightly, the tantalizing trail of hair disappearing beneath the towel⊠and God, you wanted to know where it led.
This was new. You had never felt this way before.
And he was making you crazy.
You forced yourself to move, settling onto the couch, trying to calm your racing heart as you waited for him. You distracted yourself with the snacks he had spread across the table, but your mind kept replaying that brief glimpse of him.
When he finally reappeared, dressed in a fitted shirt and sweatpants, looking effortlessly breathtaking, your breath caught in your throat.
Something about this momentâthe candlelight, the scent of dinner lingering in the air, the sheer intimacy of being here with himâfelt so real. So domestic. So much like something you wanted forever.
Zayne disappeared into the kitchen, leaving you in the glow of candlelight. A few moments later, he emerged with two plates in hand, setting them down on the dining table before motioning for you to sit.
âDid you make all of this?â you asked, raising a brow as you took in the spread before you.
âOf course,â he replied smoothly, settling across from you. âI figured youâd appreciate a home-cooked meal after the week youâve had.â
Your heart ached at how thoughtful he was.
The meal was warm and comfortingâjust like him. You took a bite, letting the rich flavors settle on your tongue and savoring the moment. Zayne watched you carefully, his gaze flicking to your lips before he took a bite of his own food.
âThis is really good,â you admitted, breaking the silence. âYouâre full of surprises.â
He smirked slightly, tilting his head. âYou act like you donât already know Iâm good with my hands.â
Your fork stalled mid-air. Heat crawled up your neck as your eyes snapped to his.
Zayne smirked slightly, taking another bite as if he hadnât set your whole body on fire with that one sentence.
Your stomach twisted, and it had nothing to do with the food.
âIââ You cleared your throat, trying to regain composure. âI suppose I do.â
His gaze flickered with amusement before he leaned back in his chair, his fingers drumming lightly against the wood. Something was intoxicating about the way he watched you. It was like he was reading every thought running through your head.
The tension built slowly, lingering between every glance, every soft smile exchanged over the rim of your glasses.
At some point, his foot brushed against yours beneath the table. It was barely a touchâso light it couldâve been an accident. But when you met his gaze, you knew it wasnât.
Neither of you spoke on it. Neither of you moved away.
It was almost unbearable, the weight of the moment, the way the air grew heavier, tighter.
After dinner, you both moved to the couch. The flickering candlelight cast shadows across his sharp features, making him look even more devastatingly handsome than usual.
You curled next to him as he flipped through the streaming options before settling on something. Not that it really matteredâyou could barely focus because of how close he was.
The movie played, but you werenât watching.
You were too aware of Zayneâs presence, the warmth of his arm resting along the back of the couch, fingers occasionally brushing against your shoulder. Every tiny touch sent a current through you.
Then, in the middle of a scene, Zayne suddenly reached for the remote.
Click.
RingâŠRingâŠRingâŠ
Your phone started ringing, now of all times, and you dropped your gaze to the device at the same time as Zayne.Â
Caleb calls all the time, but the timing of this was justâit couldnât be a coincidence. And you werenât sure if you should answer.Â
âDonât pick it up,â was all you heard, as you gripped the metal of your phone tighter.Â
âWhy,â you whispered, your voice small now. The confidence you had before flickered, unsteadyâlike a candle caught in the wind. You felt tender, exposed. Unsure if you had the strength to do what needed to be done.
âI know you wanted lessons, because of Caleb,â he started, his eyes meeting yours. The air felt cooler now, and goosebumps ran over your skin.Â
"I canât do this if youâre still holding onto him," he murmured, his voice steadyâbut stretched thin, like he was barely holding himself together.
âI canât bear to see you with himânow that your presence has graced me, I see small pieces of you everywhere I go,â he admitted, his voice soft and tortured.Â
Zayne exhaled through his nose, running a hand through his dark hair before finally speaking.
âI donât want you to want CalebâI want you to want meâ he breathed.
The screen froze mid-ring. A silence stretched between youâthick, suffocating. Heavy with everything left unsaid.
Your brows furrowed as you turned to him, only to find his gaze already on youâserious, searching.
Your breath hitched.
The weight of his words settled deep in your chest, heavy and unshakable.
You swallowed. Say it.
âI thought I wanted to be with another man, ZayneâŠâ you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. He tensed slightly, his jaw tightening, but you reached for his hand, your fingers brushing against his.
âBut I donât,â you continued softly, eyes searching his. âI want this. I want you.â
The words left you in a breath, raw and real.
Zayne didnât move, didnât speak right away. But you saw how his eyes darkened, and his throat bobbed as he swallowed.
âPlease, Zayne,â you whispered, your voice breaking slightly as you leaned in.
Your breath stilled, heart hammering. He was too closeâhis scent, the warmth radiating from his skin, the slight tremor in his breath. And then⊠finally, you leaned in, and he met you halfway.
You pulled back slightly, your breaths intertwining in the room's dimness. Your eyes opened tentatively, and you saw Zayne staring at you, his chest heaving from the kiss you had just shared.Â
âAgain,â you murmured, a silent plea because now that you were here you couldnât let this pass. And Zayne obeyed, kissing you again. You could feel him shifting your position. His hands found your back, and he briefly disconnected your lips to lay you on the couch.Â
His knees straddled your hips, as he just watched you, âBeautiful,â he whispered before tasting your lips again, the weight of him on top of you was not only delicious but welcome. You gasped at the pressure, and he slipped his tongue in your mouth. A groan escaped your mouth when his tongue entered your lips.Â
âWait,â you said, your hands resting on Zayneâs chest as he lay on you.Â
âIâve never done this before,â you said, noticing the clench of his jaw, flushed face, and swollen lips.Â
He waited for a beat, watching you silently, âIâll take care of you, princess,â he exhaled.
âI donât have much experience,â he admitted, his gaze shifting from yours.
Your eyes widened with shock at his admission. You had assumed he was experienced, and that was part of the reason you asked him for help.Â
You took a breath, smiling at him. " Let's learn together,â you whispered in his ear before leaning your head back and resting it against the pillow.Â
You pulled him flush against you, his weight pressing you into the couch. He began his thorough search kissing your temple, to the crux of your ear, âAnother lesson, âŠhm?â he whispered. And that caused you to writhe beneath himâthe sound of his voice in your ear, and the soft vibrato of his confirmation.Â
He began his steady exploration with his lips and hands. Stroking up and down your body, though most of it covered, the cool of his hands made your skin get chills when he touched you.Â
âCan I take this off?â he asked, gesturing to your t-shirt.Â
âYes,â you said too quickly, embarrassed by your eagerness.Â
You adjusted your body, allowing him to pull the fabric over your head. You lay there sitting up on your forearms, just watching his explorative touch. His pointer finger traced the outline of your bra, hovering just above your skin.Â
âYouââ you started, biting the fat of your lip, âZayne, I want you to take this off too.âÂ
And those emerald eyes watched you. In his head, he couldnât believe you would be hisâalready prepared to memorize your every reaction. His hand trembled before steadying against your skin. The contact of his hand caused you to arch away from the couch. Click.
The bra fell forward as you shrugged it off your arms. Your whole body felt warm as you guided Zayneâs hands to hold your breasts. Your hands rested on his before you moved them back to the couch. His thumbs felt the hardening peaks beneath his hands, and he gave them a tentative flick, watching your face. You squirmed beneath him.Â
Sensitive here. He made a mental note, before rubbing the hardened nub against his thumb at a steady pace.Â
He moved his mouth to your other breast kissing it, before watching your face as his tongue made contact with it. Your hips jerked forward gently when he flicked it with his tongue. You bit your lip watching him play with your nipples.Â
âCanâyou touch me there?â you whimpered. His lips parted from your nipple.Â
âWhere?â he asked, and both of you just looked at each other.Â
Before you took his hand and brought it between your legs. You held it there rubbing yourself on his hand through your pants, but you didn't miss the way Zayne trained his eyes on you. Watching each little reaction you had when he touched you. Even the lightest of touch made his lips part slightly even with the furious flush of his skin.Â
His cock was straining in his pants, but he waited, wanting to learn you first.
He laid you down, your hands threading into his hair. Pulling him close to you he buried his face in your neck. The smell of jasmine filled your senses, as he groaned beneath you, breathing in your scent. You leaned back into the couch, shaken by the idea of him on top of you.
Your breasts pressed against his chest, the cool fabric causing a shiver to roll through you. He ran his face up and down your neck leaving a trail of light kisses. It was as if he was savoring you, imprinting your smell, your presence in his mindâas if youâd be done with him after this.
âYouâre beautiful,â he groaned against your throat.
Zayne steadied himself on his hands on either side of your head, his gaze trailing over your body to where he would find himself next. His eyes stopped between your thighs, he watched intently as you squirmed beneath him, your body shifting under his gaze.
Your heartbeat felt loud in your ears, and the cold stillness of the air sent a shiver through you. His lips found your jaw, kissing a slow line tracing to your throat. Each touch of his lips sent heat between your legs, and you tilted your head to give him more access, a whimper escaping your lips.Â
Zayne was just a friend, someone who supported and loved you but someone you felt you couldnât have. Your change of heart made you act on a whim to take advantage of your time with him. You wanted him, and no one else could have him but you. He was a high you couldn'tâdidn't want to get rid of.Â
You grasped the blankets on the couch, trying to ground yourself somehow, while he worked slow kisses down your chest with light scrapes of his teeth.
His hands ran down your sides, caressing your breasts to your hips, his thumbs brushing the naked skin beneath your sweatpants. It was a maddening sensation, and you only wanted him to keep going.
You could see his erection pressed firmly against his pants, and you felt tempted to reach forward, to touch it. To pull him closer firmly against you, to feel him where you needed him most.Â
One of his hands left you cupping you over your pants. The pressure against your clit stole your breath. A quiet groan of approval left his lips, while you felt a pulse between your legs.
You ground your hips upwards into his hand. A breath left your lips as you moved your hips.Â
âTouch me, Zayne,â you breathed, you felt like you were in a dream.Â
He paused, his breath hitching at your words. His gaze darkened, the green of his eyes barely visible, as he searched your face. His jaw clenched, his voice dropping, rough with restraint. âSay that again.â
You observed him, grabbing the drawstrings of his pants. âTouch me Zayne, âŠPleaseâ Your voice came out small, pleading.Â
He exhaled slowly, his fingers twitching against your skin. He traced your pussy through your pants, his fingers burning through your pantsâthat you wished heâd taken off already.Â
"You have no idea what you do to me," he murmured, his thumb brushing over you, his touch reverent, like he was memorizing you.
You had never been undressed like this. And you wanted it, you wanted to be touched by him, to feel him grabbing you.
He gripped the waistband of your pants, adjusting his position to push them down your thighs, dropping them to the floor. You sat there in only black underwear while he sat across from you, still in his t-shirt and sweats.Â
His attention was all yours, and it was thrilling.Â
Your hands still gripped the blanket beneath you. Your feet were tucked next to your bottom.Â
âLet me see you.â His voice was low and deliberate. His fingertips grazed your knee before applying the faintest pressure. His eyes searched yours, waiting. âSpread your legs for me.â
You took in an unsteady breath, and you did it.Â
His hands ran up your legs, his fingers pressing into your thighs, making your stomach tighten unexpectedly. The cool of his hands felt good against your soft skin.Â
The cool air brushed against your panties making you aware of how wet your panties were. Zayneâs gaze met you there, shooting warmth through you.
Your breath hitched when his thumb pressed down on your clit through the fabric. His other hand was steady on your thigh, pressing your thighs open wider. The brush of his thumb up and down sparked a heat in your lower stomach.
You leaned your head back and started to rock under his touch. And then he kissed your nipple, sucking it into his mouth. He groaned, licking and sucking your breasts with a slight scrape of teeth. A high-pitched moan escaped your lips, one of your hands gripping his hair.Â
His mouth was so hot, and he kept licking you, how youâd never felt before. You felt like you could die. So, when he removed his mouth from your breasts, you thought you were going to scream.Â
He removed your underwear, leaving them in a pile with the rest of your clothes, spreading your legs once more as his gaze fell between your thighs.Â
His fingers glide gently along your inner thigh, his touch warm and deliberate, but never rushed. His gaze softens as he takes you in, his breathing slow, controlledâlike heâs memorizing every part of you.
"Are you sure?" he murmured, his voice hushed, almost reverent. His thumb stroked lazy circles against your skin, a silent reassurance, a quiet promise that he wonât rush you.
When you nodded, his lips part slightly, his eyes locked onto yours, searchingâmaking sure.
"Let me take care of you," he breathed, his hands smoothing up your thighs as he leaned in closer, pressing a lingering kiss just above your knee. "I want to make this good for you."
He wrapped his arms around the back of your thighs, pulling you closer to him, and his head lowered between them. You shuddered at the first touch of his tongue, pleasure running through you. Each soft lap of your clit rolled through you.Â
His arms held you so securely that you couldnât move your hips while he licked you. As much as he said he wanted to take care of you, it felt like he was doing this for himself.Â
âZayne,â you moaned, digging your hands into his thick black hair.Â
He swirled his tongue over your clit before sucking. His eyes were on you, watching you writhe beneath him. His finger filled you, sending a tremor through you, with his mouth on your clit, licking and sucking, while his fingers moved in and out of you. And he did it with such ease, deep noises of satisfaction falling from his lips.Â
He was taking his time, slowly working you out and the pressure was building up in you. You bucked your hips, feeling the heat growing throughout you.Â
âZayneâŠI need more,â you cried out, your voice trembling with desperation.Â
His name fell from your lips like a prayer, and he answered it with slow, calculated movementsâhis pace steady, yet devastating. He added another finger, stretching you further, his touch unrelenting as he pressed deeper, curling just right. The pleasure was unbearable in the best way, a wave crashing over you with no hope of escape.
Your breath hitched as his dark, heated gaze met yours, watching, reading every reaction like it was the only thing that mattered. His free hand smoothed over your thigh, grounding you, soothing youâonly to bring you higher moments later.
A choked-out plea left your lips, your body arching, back curving as the heat coursed through your veins, pooling low in your stomach. You clenched around him, muscles tightening as that sharp, dizzying pleasure built to a breaking point.
âThat's it,â he murmured, voice thick with something unreadable, something possessive yet achingly tender. He pressed an open-mouthed kiss against the soft skin of your inner thigh, his breath hot and teasing, sending shivers up your spine.
And thenârelease.
Your body trembled, pleasure crashing into you in relentless waves. He didn't stop, not right away, working you through it, coaxing every last aftershock from your sensitive body until you were completely spent.
You collapsed against the couch, fully fucked out, limbs heavy, your mind hazy with bliss.Â
A shaky breath left your mouth, as you sat up slowly running your fingers through his hair.
Neither of you spoke. You didnât need to.
The air between you was charged, thick with something unspoken, something dangerous. Something real.
His jasmine scent invaded your senses as his body wrapped around yours. You closed your eyes, surprised by the sudden upward jerk of him holding your naked body. You held him close as he carried you to the closed bedroom door.Â
He laid you on the bed gently, holding your stare, he slipped off his shirt and sweatpants, your cheeks growing warmer even as he stood before you in his briefs. You glanced at his erection pressed through the fabric. He was so hard, and it was hot. And all for you.Â
Goose bumps spread across your skin, as he opened the nightstand drawer, pulling out a condom.Â
âDo you want me?â he whispered, his gaze meeting yours, as he dropped his briefs.Â
âYes,â you breathed.
He crawled over you, kissing your stomach and breasts as he did. His body covered yours, so heavy. It made your skin sing with satisfaction. He kissed your neck, bracing his hands beside your head.Â
Your fingers trailed the line of hair, you'd been desperate to touch. You hesitated, unsure how to touch him.Â
Zayne felt your hesitation, and meeting your gaze, he whispered, âYour touch⊠I need it.â
Your heart fluttered with uncertainty, but you slid your hands down gripping his erection. His forehead fell on the side of your neck, encouraging you further.Â
You wrapped your hand around his length. And he groaned. You ran your hand down to the base and all the way back up.Â
"Donât make me waitâŠplease" you whispered in his ear, placing a kiss there.
"Tell me how much you need me,â he rasped, nipping at your neck.
"Iâve always needed you, Zayne," you said softly, dragging your hands through his hair. "I need you in every way⊠not just tonight."
His eyes met yours before kissing you while you stroked him again. Your breasts brushed against his chest, sending pleasure through you.Â
â...Pleaseâ you breathed.Â
He rolled onto the bed next to you, slipping off his briefs, the sound of the wrapper crinkling in his hands drawing your attention. You watched as he poised to tear it open, his gaze flicking to yours for confirmation.
âWait,â you whispered, your voice soft but resolute. He paused instantly, his eyes searching yours.
âI want to feel all of you,â you said, vulnerability lacing your tone, the weight of your trust hanging in the air.
His expression softened, his brow furrowing with both tenderness and concern.
âIf itâs too much, just say the word,â he murmured, his voice low and steady, a promise woven into each syllable. âI wonât do anything you donât want.â
He leaned down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead, lingering as though to reassure you. Positioning himself at your entrance, his movements were deliberate, his focus entirely on you.
He took the head of his erection and rubbed it against your pussy. The tip caught your clit, causing your breath to hitch. He started to slip the head inside you, and it stung. A shudder rolled through you as you exhaled. Your fingers curled on his chest as he stayed still inside you, watching your face.Â
He pushed deeper into you, his gaze dark and unwavering as he watched the way your lips parted, a soft whimper spilling free. The sound sent a shudder through his body, his breath coming out ragged as he struggled to hold himself together.
The stretch burnedâa slow, intoxicating burnâone that sent heat rolling through your veins. You felt so full, every inch of him fitting into you as though he was meant to be there.
When he finally bottomed out, a cry tore from your throat, your back arching, pressing you flush against his chest. His arms wrapped around you instinctively, his weight solid, grounding, overwhelming in the best way.
He didnât move right away.
Instead, he stayed buried deep, letting you adjust, letting you feel every inch of him. Your arms wound around his neck, and he exhaled against your skin, his breath warm and uneven.
For a moment, there was only the sound of your mingled breathing, the slow rise and fall of your chests as you both tried to catch air. He was everywhere, his presence consuming, intoxicating.
And then, he moved.
A slow, deliberate roll of his hips.
You gasped at the sensation, at the way he dragged against your walls with aching precision, each thrust filling you completely. Your nails raked down his back, and he shuddered at the sensation, his control fraying at the edges.
âYou take it so good,â he praised, his voice thick, rough with something raw, something reverent.Â
Every time his pelvis ground against yours, his head spread throughout you. The friction sent sparks up your spine, every movement of his body against yours pulling a new sound from your lips.
He was watching you, utterly captivated by the way you unraveled beneath him. His thrusts remained slow, deliberate, as if savoring every reaction, every little gasp and moan that escaped you.
His fingers traced down your side, over the curve of your waist, gripping you tighter as his pace deepened, intensified. His gaze burned into yours, filled with something you couldnât quite name.
His eyes locked onto yours, his thrusts slow and deliberate. âSo beautiful for me,â he rasped, his voice low, dripping with need.
The words ran over your skin, filling you with warm satisfaction, your head tilting back as another moan escaped you. Zayneâs lips hovered above yours. With each slow thrust, they brushed yours lightly.Â
His pace faltered, his rhythm stuttering as he fought for control, his breath ragged against your skin. But he didnât dare rushâhe wanted to feel every second of this, every shudder, every tremor that wracked your body beneath him.
âYouâre mine⊠all mine,â he groaned, voice thick with possession, his body tensing, muscles drawn taut as he drove his hips deep one last time.
A choked moan escaped you as you shattered beneath him, pleasure crashing over you in waves. His grip on you tightened as his own release followed, a deep, guttural sound leaving his lips as he buried himself fully, claiming every inch of you.
For a moment, there was nothing but the sound of your ragged breathing, your hearts hammering in sync as he collapsed against you, his weight a comforting warmth pressing you into the mattress.
Neither of you spoke right away.
Zayne traced slow, lazy circles on your bare skin, grounding himself in the feel of you, the reality of you. His forehead rested against yours, his breath still uneven but calming, syncing with yours.
Then, in the quiet, his lips tipped into a smirk against your temple.
âSo⊠does this mean I can finally call you my girlfriend?â His voice was lower now, teasing but laced with something realâsomething hopeful.
He pulled back slightly, eyes searching yours in the dim light. âOr do I have to seduce you all over again?â
His grin was cocky, but there was something vulnerable in the way he looked at youâlike he needed this answer.
Your fingers tangled in his hair, a slow, tired smile spreading on your lips as you exhaled softly.
"I think you already have," you whispered.
The tension broke as he let out a satisfied hum, pressing a kiss to your shoulder before pulling you closer, holding you like he never wanted to let go.
Warnings: MDNI, sex, virginity loss, threesome, oral (m rec), clit play, childhood friends to lovers trope. Liberties taken with the timeline, this is not the canon timeline, ages have been changed for story convenience. ANGSTY.
A/n: Caleb got me ya'll. I tried, I tried really hard, I promise. And now this is what my ovulating brain has cooked up. Please enjoy it. I know this wasn't on my upcoming but I couldn't help it. Also please note, reader, Caleb, and Zayne are all the same age aka 18 here. Not proofread, expect raw text and descriptions.
It had been a few weeks since youâd joined UNICORNS and Tara invited you over to her place for a girlsâ weekend. All of you were comfortably laid out in different parts of her living room, drinking wine and eating slices of pizza from the box.
The night had been fun, and with an entire bottle now empty, the women were loosening up and the topics were getting more and more risque. From complaining about exes to sex, to size measurements, they had finally arrived on the subject of virginity.Â
âSo, what was your first time like?â All eyes are suddenly fixed on you and you feel self-conscious. Taking a sip of your wine, you try not to flush as you vividly remember all the details like it was yesterday.
âOh, you know. Awkward. Shy. The usual.â You try to act nonchalant but Tara leans forward with a gleam in her eye.Â
âOh come on! Tell us!â
Looking at the crowd of eager faces, you empty your glass before confessing, âMy first timeâŠwas with two people.â You wait with bated breath, and slowly, one by one, everyoneâs eyes widen with comprehension.
âExcuse me?â Tara squeals and sinks her fingers into your arm. You wince and pry her off.
âA threesome for your first time?â One of the other women joined in, a huge grin on her face. âDid it hurt?â
âWhy a threesome? Was it something you fantasized about?â
You shake your head no at all the questions. âNo. Growing up, I had two best friends and I loved them dearly. I justâŠcouldnât choose between them both.âÂ
âTell us everything.â Tara sits down on the carpet and all the women gather in a tight circle looking eagerly at you. You sigh and extend your glass.
âGet me more wine.â
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
~Flashback~
It was the summer after graduating senior year. You were enjoying what would possibly be the last summer before everyone went their separate ways. Life had been rough for you, losing your family several years earlier. But now, you had a grandmother, and 2 best friends who had been through everything with you. Still, the memories brought back a sense of bittersweet nostalgia. Your nextdoor neighbor Zayne, and your grandmotherâs other ward Caleb, were your inseparable companions since you had moved in with Josephine after the devastating wanderer attack that had destroyed most of Linkon City.Â
Zayne and Caleb were alike, yet different. Both of them were tall and intelligent. Zayne was stoic and introverted, whereas Caleb was extroverted and easygoing. Somehow, the three of you became a unit, never seen without the other two in tow. Any escapades or shenanigans were always done together. Youâd done homework together, fell asleep on the living room floor watching cartoons, and shared many meals in the last few years. The idea of being without them seemed unthinkable. Impossible in fact. Youâd assumed you would all stay together in Linkon forever.
That had all changed last year, the summer before your senior year. You had been looking forward to spending the summer with Zayne and Caleb. But as the three of you had sat down at your usual boba tea spot, Zayne became very quiet as you started discussing plans for the summer.Â
âWhatâs wrong with you? Is your tea not cold enough? You can just use your evol right?â Caleb had teased, sipping his drink. He gives Zayne a playful jab and Zayne glares at him, adjusting his glasses that had slipped down his nose.Â
âZayne?â You reach out and cover his hand with yours, hoping heâll talk. There was a strange expression on his face. âTalk to us.â
âYeah, Zayne. Talk to us.â Caleb widens his eyes and covers your hand with his. âWeâre here for you boy,â he says with a tinge of mockery, making his voice sound high and feminine and you give him a withering look, pulling your hand out of the pile.
Zayne sips his milk tea, then quietly says, âI might not be here for most of the summer.â Caleb and you exchange a look before glancing back at Zayne.Â
âWhat do you mean?â
Zayne looks apologetic like he regrets not sharing this news earlier. âIâll be touring colleges most of the summer. And my parents decided to make it a road trip.â
âColleges?â Caleb looked intrigued. âYou already started applications?â
âI did. AndâŠseveral of them have already sent in offers for next fall.âÂ
âWhat?!â Youâre louder than you had intended to be. Zayne winces and you lower your voice. âYouâve already received acceptance letters and didnât bother telling us?âÂ
âIâm sorry.â Zayne holds up his hands in a gesture of peace. âI just didnât know how to bring it up. Neither of you had mentioned college and I didnât want to talk about it if you werenât ready.â
âBut Zaynie!â Caleb puts a hand on his chest looking wounded. âWeâre a family bro! Why wouldnât you tell us?â
Zayne shakes his head and drinks his tea. Youâre about to as well when realization washes over you. âWait. You said you had several acceptance letters.â
âI do.â
âWell, where are they? Youâre staying in Linkon right?â You ask, and for some reason, your heartbeat is increasing. You wait for Zayne to say, of course, one of them is in Linkon and thatâs his first choice.Â
âI did receive an offer from Linkon Medical University. HoweverâŠthere are better programs.â
âReally? So you might move for college?â Caleb regards Zayne passively.Â
âItâs not out of the question.â
An unnatural silence falls at the table as the three of you drink your teas. This was wonderful news for Zayne. You were happy for him, but inside, it felt like your heart had been tied into a painful knot. You knew Zayne was the smartest of your group and that he was destined to be a doctor. But you hadnât even thought it would mean Zayne might not be in Linkon City anymore. From a professional standpoint, it made sense. He deserved to go to the best college. But it left you feeling hollow like his impending departure had fractured the carefully crafted life youâd built since youâd been taken in by your grandmother.Â
âWhen are you leaving?â Caleb breaks the silence and youâre relieved.Â
âSometime in July.â
âOh, great! We still have a month then.â
âWellâŠâ
Calebâs eyebrows knit together in dismay. âWhat?â
âI have some extra classes I need to take. Iâm hoping to get a head start on the pre-med requisites.â
âSo, youâre going to be in school all of June?â You try to hide your disappointment.Â
Zayne sighs. âUnfortunately. Iâll still be around. We can make time to hang out.âÂ
You nod unenthusiastically, then hiss as you feel Caleb step on your foot under the table. His purple eyes give you a sharp glance and he gestures towards Zayne and you realize this wasnât about you; Zayne had shared news that he knew would affect your dynamic but had done so thinking he would have the support of his friends. Caleb reminding you of your manners was humbling and you lowered your gaze.
âIâm really happy for you Zayne.â You murmur, then rearrange your features into what you hoped was a pleasant look of approval. âCongratulations.â
Zayneâs eyes seem to lighten at your appreciation. âThank you. It took me by surprise actually.â
âSeriously Zaynie. Thatâs really impressive. So weâre gonna have a doctor amongst us. Hey, you better give us the good drugs if we ever come to you.â Caleb pats Zayne on the shoulder in an acclamatory fashion. Zayneâs demeanor visibly relaxes and you try to keep up a happy face for the rest of the evening.
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
The sun was starting to set by the time you got home, the lazy streaks of tangerine painting the sky vivid shades of pink and orange. There was a feeling of uneasiness in your stomach as you changed into pajamas and brushed your teeth. It had taken years for you to get some semblance of a family, and now someone was going away. AGAIN.
You try to reassure yourself that this wasnât the same thing. Zayne might be going away for college but it wasnât until next year. You still had your senior year left to build some precious final memories. Somehow, he seemed older all of a sudden, like he had become an adult within a few hours of telling you about his acceptance letters. You knew youâd be going to college too but hadnât given much thought about any of it. After the Linkon City disaster, you had decided you didnât want to wander too far away. You didnât want to leave Grandma Josephine all by herself. Although Zayne seemed to have made up his mind about attending a college somewhere else, you reminded yourself that you still had Caleb.Â
Caleb hadnât talked about college much, but you knew he wanted to attend. He didnât know what he would major in, but he was naturally gifted in mechanics. You assumed he would be an engineer or something similar. He and Zayne had inherited the math skills, and youâd managed to get a decent grade by studying with them, or rather, getting bullied by them, with Zayne trying not to snap explaining how he got the answer versus Caleb taunting you saying youâd never graduate high school if you were this stupid. It was then you had decided perhaps a career in science wasnât for you. But perhaps something in the arts, or communications. Perhaps languages. You wondered if maybe you were kidding yourself by not already sending out applications, or at the very least, making a list of where youâd like to attend.
Restless and unable to turn off your mind, you go next door to Calebâs room and knock.
âEnter at your own risk!â
Rolling your eyes, you walk in and see Caleb sprawled out on his bed, holding his Switch over his head as he gamed. âOh, pipsqueak. Itâs you.â
You sit on the edge of his bed, fiddling with the corner of the quilt as he continues to play. As you waited, you looked up at the ceiling, where little airplane models, all built by Calebâs own hands, had been carefully strung up using fish wire and hooks. Little glow-in-the-dark stars littered the spaces in between. You sigh and draw your knees up to your chest, wondering what would happen to the models if he left for college.
Noticing your morose expression, Caleb exits the game and sits upright. âWhatâs the matter with you?âÂ
You shake your head and squeeze the bridge of your nose. âItâs Zayne. Did you know he had already applied to colleges?â
âNo.â Caleb leans on his bed assessing you. âBut Iâm not surprised. And he has a point.â
âWhich is?â
âColleges are really competitive these days. Like even with excellent grades and extracurriculars, some people still have to take a gap year because they didnât get in or they got put on a waiting list.â
You consider his words. âDo you think we should be applying too?â
âIf we were smarter, weâd have already applied.â Caleb runs a hand over his face. âBut itâs ok. We have the whole summer to plan. I think applications reopen sometime over winter break. We can apply then. You know, like normal students, and not nerds like Zayne.â
You laugh weakly, giving Caleb a reprimanding look. âThatâs not a nice thing to say about our friend.â
âHeâs not around is he? Anyway. Donât fret pipsqueak. Youâll get in somewhere too.â
âYouâll stay close to Linkon right?â You lean closer to Caleb, your eyes boring into his. âWe canât leave grandma by herself.â
âOf course. Donât worry.â Caleb puts an arm around your shoulders and pulls you towards him. Your head rests on his shoulder as he traces circles into your arm. The action is comforting and familiar, and a sense of calm washes over you.Â
âI donât like it when people leave.â You confess quietly and Caleb sighs.
âI know. You used to cry all the time when you first came here. You cried when grandma left to get groceries. You cried when I left for soccer practice. You cried when it was time for Zayne to go home. Honestly,â he smirks and pinches you, making you yip in surprise. âYouâre such a crybaby that Iâm surprised you want to attend college at all. You know youâre gonna have to live with strangers in the dorm right? Are you gonna cry into your little bear plushie?â
He grins and dodges a blow from you, a bark of laughter escaping him as you try to roughhouse. He indulges you for two missed attempts then leaps and pins you to the mattress. You squirm and shriek under him, trying to escape as he tickles you relentlessly.
âCaleb! Caleb stop!â There are tears in your eyes from the hilarity of the situation.
âAw, are you gonna cry when youâre being tickled now too? Crybaby crybaby!â Caleb continues to mock you before you pull a dirty move; you angle your knee against his crotch and grin as you instantly feel him go still.
âYou wouldnât dare.â Calebâs breathing has stilled, and heâs warily looking down at you as you prepare to play your trump card.Â
âIâve done it before and wonât hesitate to do it again.â Knowing you had him in the palm of your hand, you look him deadpan in the eye.
âGet off.â Caleb complies immediately and you sigh, trying to calm your unsteady heart.
âYouâre really heartless sometimes ya know?â Calebâs voice is heard near your head and you turn to face him.
âI had to learn.â
A moment of peace falls between you both and Caleb softly cups your cheek. âEverything will be ok. I promise. You wonât be left behind. Youâll always have a family. Weâll never be too far away from you.âÂ
âYouâd better not.â You huff and suddenly feel exhausted. âCaleb?â
âYou can stay here tonight.â
âI didnât-â
âI already knew. I knew from the second Zayne said heâs not going to be around this summer.â Caleb shifts and pulls you under his quilt. You bury your nose into his chest and close your eyes.
âThis doesnât mean Iâm not independent.â You quip and a rumble emanates from Calebâs chest.
âOf course not pipsqueak. Miss independent.â He strokes your hair and your eyelids grow heavy. Caleb tucks your head under his chin. âBut you can be as dependent on me as you want.â Those are the last words you hear before falling into a deep slumber.
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
You barely see Zayne for the next few weeks. His classes kept him busy and he always had homework. Caleb had suddenly become secretive after the night youâd spent in his room though he kept reassuring you that he was fine. You sulk as you watch TV by yourself, Caleb having locked himself in his room again. You wondered what had made him behave so differently. The last few times youâd tried to talk to him, heâd unceremoniously shoved you back out.Â
âBoys need their privacy sometimes,â Grandma had reassured you, noticing the way you were glowering at the TV. âWould you like to help me run errands?âÂ
Josephine's list wasnât terribly exciting, but you were still bitter from being snubbed by Caleb, so you went anyway. Several hours later, you return feeling accomplished. Just as youâre about to help Josephine put away the groceries, you hear footsteps on the stairs and Caleb finally makes an entrance.Â
âOh look at that! Our groundhog has made a rare appearance!â Josephine teases as Caleb grins sheepishly.Â
âOoh, apples!â He says zealously seeing you unbag the bright red fruits. As heâs about to grab one you smack his hand and he withdraws with a yelp.Â
âWhat was that for?â He rubs his hand looking offended.Â
âOnly people who helped buy the groceries are entitled to eat them.â You put them away neatly into the fruit basket on the counter, refusing to look at Caleb. With Zayne being awol you had thought Caleb would be a little more sensitive towards you and you were still quite annoyed at his lack of consideration. Caleb huffs, then hoists himself onto the kitchen counter, his long legs dangling off the edge.
âWhat were you doing all this while anyway?â Josephine asks as she puts away more groceries. âSummer vacation usually means I canât get a hold of you two even if I needed to. I thought you were planning to go to the beach? Play volleyball with some of your friends?â
âYeah, and we will. Even if this little gremlin is mad at me.â Caleb hesitantly looks at you, hoping youâd simmered down but you shoot daggers at him and he shakes his head. âI need to talk to you both.â
Your heart skips a beat at his words. You turn to look at him but Calebâs eyes are fixated on Josephine, whoâs looking curious.Â
âWhat is it? Nothing serious I hope?â The old woman sits down at the kitchen table.Â
âNo, itâs not serious. But. Itâs kind of sudden.â Calebâs refusal to make eye contact with you was now starting to scare you. âGrandma, we told you about Zayne and him already getting ready for college right?â
âYou did. I always knew Zayne would excel at whatever he put his mind to. Clever boy that one.â
âWell, his news was sort of a wake-up call for me. What I was doing all these days was looking at colleges, and I think I know what I want to do.â
The evening summer sunlight falls charmingly on Calebâs face, illuminating his smooth skin, the dark hair falling elegantly into his eyes and for a moment, you feel the same sensation you had felt after Zayne had told you about college. You heart was already twisting into nervous knots, and you waited with bated breath as Caleb continued.Â
âIâve decided I want to be a pilot.â His eyes are lit up with ambition as he says the words. Josephine cups her cheeks with her hands, a smile growing on her wrinkled face.
âThatâs wonderful Caleb! Iâm very happy for you.â
âYeah. And. Thereâs something else I found out while doing my research.â Josephine immediately leans forward attentively. You listen quietly, but you canât help but feel a slight sense of betrayal. Why would Caleb need to hide this from you? It wasnât a secret that he wanted to go to college, and he loved talking about planes and jets. You felt like there was a piece he was hiding, saving it for fear of losing their attention.Â
âThe Deepspace Aviation Administration has an apprenticeship-based degree which guarantees Iâd graduate as a pilot. Itâs a degree in Aviation Engineering. Grandma.â Calebâs voice has softened, and he looks at her beseechingly.âTheyâre offering a month-long crash camp this summer. A lot of the students that go have better chances of making it into the program. Thereâs one slot left. Can I please go?â
There it was. Thatâs what heâd been hiding. A month. Without Caleb. Silently, you resume unpacking the groceries, turning your back to Caleb as you do so. Josephineâs face was lined with delight.Â
âOh, Caleb! Iâm so happy youâve figured this out. Of course, you can go!â She rises from her seat and makes her way to Caleb who slips off the counter to hug her. She barely came up to his waist but sheâs brimming with pride.Â
âGo fill out the application before someone else gets it! Go!â She slapped him on the back and Caleb, looking like heâd just been told heâd won the lottery, sprinted back upstairs. Silence fills the small kitchen. Pretending to act normal, you start gathering ingredients to prepare dinner.
âAnnoying loser.â You mutter under your breath. âHe hasnât even offered to help cook dinner the last few days.â You feel a hand on your shoulder and turn to see Josephine standing right behind you.Â
âItâs ok to be upset.â
âIâm not upset.â You start washing the potatoes at the sink. Josephine sighs, then wraps her arms around your waist, giving you a gentle hug.
âTake your time. You know where to find me if you want to talk.â The woman hobbles out of the kitchen, and you put the washed potatoes on a cutting board. Your hand trembles as you pick up the knife, and the backs of your eyes feel hot and prickly. You didnât understand why you felt like this. It was just a month. Caleb hadnât applied for college yet. And even if he ended up at Deepspace Aviation it wasnât too far away. But why did you feel like you were being left behind? Like everyone had their future planned but you? And none of their plans seemed to involve you at all?
You angle your knife to slice the potatoes, then let out a frustrated huff; memories of being a little girl, while Caleb held your hand in his as he taught you how to quickly dice your vegetables, patting your head with praise as he did so. You werenât quite sure why potatoes were making you feel this way. Unbidden, a tear rolls down your cheek and you dash it away with your finger.
âDidnât even offer to help with dinner.â More tears stream down your face and you let out a quiet sob.Â
âThereâs no one to help me make dinner.â
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
âCâmon pipsqueak, at least say goodbye to me!âÂ
Caleb was standing at the door, ready to leave for camp. You stood, arms crossed, refusing to speak to him. Josephine softly gives you a push.
âGo on now. Youâll regret it if you donât.â
âNo, I wonât. Besides heâll be back in a month. Itâs not like heâs staying there forever. Like theyâd let him. Theyâll probably call us begging to to take him back within a week.â Your snarky attitude hadnât improved since heâd announced his acceptance.Â
Josephine looks at Caleb and shakes her head helplessly. Sheâd attempted to ameliorate your temper for the last 2 weeks and had gotten nowhere. You had avoided Caleb altogether, even when heâd come knocking on your door to talk. There was a vindictive satisfaction in knowing that your ignoring him was bothering him. A little taste of his own medicine. Didnât feel so good to be shut off from your best friend now, did it? The thought made your lip curl even as your stomach churned from the knowledge that you would be by yourself for the next month.Â
Caleb checks his watch and runs a hand through his hair. âIâm getting late. Pipsqueak please.â Caleb opens his arms, giving you the most apologetic look he could muster. âCome say goodbye.â
You stood firm, even though every fiber in your being was burning to leap into his arms and hug him tight.Â
âThe bus wonât wait forever.â Caleb quickly strides towards you and before you can step away heâs wrapped his arms around you, and youâre stuck in his embrace. Tears form in your eyes but you refuse to let them fall. Your arms remain stiff at your sides even as Caleb continues to hunch, silently bidding you farewell. When he finally lets go, he ruffles your hair. âIâll see you next month. You can always reach me on my phone.â With a final wave, Caleb sprints out the door to board the bus.
You spend the day coming up with various ways to kill the time but nothing works. Video games felt lackluster and your mind refused to engage with the book you tried reading. For dinner, Josephine ordered burgers from your favorite restaurant to try and cheer you up. You sat quietly, unable to savor the food. Finally, before bedtime, you cave. Anything was better than this crushing, empty feeling in your stomach. You walk into Calebâs room, and curl up under his quilt, inhaling the familiar scent. It was hard to believe he had been there just a few hours earlier, and you hugged his pillow, regretting your earlier actions. You pull out your phone and make a video call.
âPipsqueak! Miss me already?â Caleb grins widely at you. The background is filled with activity, filled with high school students wandering around and acquainting themselves.Â
âShut up.â You say but your voice quivers. âCaleb Iâm sorry.â
Calebâs eyes soften. âItâs ok. You donât have to be.â
âBut I was so mean to you.â
âYeah, you were. But what can I say? How can I be mad at my family?â His words break the shield youâd built around yourself and you sniffle, letting the tears fall.Â
âPlease donât cry all over my pillow. Itâll get soggy.â Caleb tries to joke but your tears are eating away at him. He knew what this would do to you, which is why he hadnât told you his plans before they were solid. âIâll be back before you know it. Be good for grandma ok?â
You nod, a lump forming in your throat. âI miss you, Caleb.â
âI miss you too. Please donât be miserable the whole time Iâm gone. Try to focus on things important to you too. Maybe make your list of colleges.â
âYeah. I will.â You wipe away your tears. âWill you make dumplings for me when you come back?â
âIs that all I was good for?â Caleb asks in an offended tone but heâs grinning. âYeah I will. I promise. Now go to sleep.â
He hangs up and you find the knot in your heart has loosened slightly. Caleb was right. You needed to focus on you. You turn over and are about to go to sleep when a text lights up your screen.
âIce cream tomorrow?â
It was from Zayne. You smile. Theyâd never really leave you all alone. You text him a yes and fall asleep contentedly.
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
âHow are you feeling with Caleb gone?â
Youâre seated across from Zayne with a huge banana split sitting on the table between you. You twirl the spoon between your fingers, thinking.
âItâs strange. I miss him of course. The house feels empty.â You sample some of the ice cream. âItâs even emptier without you.â
Zayne looks guilty as he also takes a bite of the sundae. âIâm sorry. I know it must seem strange given how much time we all spent together. Believe me, if I had known Caleb wasnât going to be here I would have put in more effort to check in on you.â
âItâs not your fault.â You lay down your spoon, contemplating. Zayne cocks his head.
âSomething on your mind?â
You twitch your mouth to the side and try to explain. âWell, I recently realized I seem to have a problem with being by myself. And Iâm trying to change that.â
âWhyâs that?â
âBecause. Itâs illogical for me to think Iâll always have you or Caleb or grandma around. I know a lot of it stems from losing my parents. But I canât be this way every time I have to be away from you guys.â You stab the spoon into the mound of whipped cream at the top of the ice cream. âWeâre all going to college next year, and we might go months without seeing each other. Iâm trying to be more independent and in control of my feelings. Otherwise, how am I supposed to survive?â
Zayne nods emphatically as you speak. âThatâs a very rational way of thinking. However, I donât think I can fault you for not wanting any of us to move away.â
âReally?â You carefully fish out a cherry from the top of one of the ice cream scoops.Â
âOf course. Itâs natural to want to stay close to the people who have been a constant in your life.â Zayne glances away from you before continuing. âMy parents are doctors. Theyâre busy most of the time. I work around their schedule. But Iâm always more relaxed when one of them is at home. Itâs natural to want to be around oneâs family. Your feelings are completely natural.â
You let out a breath and laugh. âWell geez Dr. Zayne,â you tease. âThank you for the psychological assessment.âÂ
âAnytime.â He offers you a wry smile. âBut I think itâs good youâre taking the initiative to adapt. The most successful people arenât the smartest, but the most adaptable.â
âOh? So am I smarter than you?â
âHardly,â Zayne smirks as you pout, âI happen to be both.â
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
Now here you were, senior year finished, the summer that you had hoped would take its time in arriving sitting at your doorstep like a lost puppy begging to be let in. You had opened a window and a cool breeze was blowing past your face. You look out at the neighborhood of Bloomshore, remembering how intimidating it had looked when you first moved here, and now how you could never imagine leaving.
Zayne had returned from his road trip the past summer with a million photos and tales from each city he had visited with his parents. Heâd brought back snacks and small trinkets from each place, and every few days, youâd find a postcard from him in the mailbox. Youâd saved each one and put them away into a little keepsake box. When he had finally come over after his trip, Josephine had almost giggled herself silly because Zayne had tanned so much during his absence; a lighter ring had formed around his eyes like a raccoon where the sunglasses had perched. Youâd laughed when you saw him, and Zayne had merely shook his head in exasperation.Â
Caleb had returned from camp with a whole new attitude towards his future. He seemed more confident, and couldnât stop talking about engines and how being in a cockpit felt. Being the extrovert he was, heâd also come back with many new friends, some of whom lived just a few blocks from your house. You had initially disliked these new friends because it intensified the feeling that you had been replaced. Until one of them had mentioned that Caleb always looked at your picture before he fell asleep at night. Caleb had acted nonchalant but a dusting of pink had appeared on his face at the remark.Â
As you had predicted, Zayne had settled on and formally accepted an offer from one of the colleges. He had decided to attend a prestigious medical university at Snowcrest, a city that you knew was near the Arctic, frigidly cold, with short and mild summers. Although not impossibly far, it was still a long journey to reach Snowcrest, and you had felt some of the hope that was in your chest being crushed. Reminding yourself that you were trying to become a more assertive, independent woman, you had heartily congratulated Zayne while Caleb had teased that it was because Zayne would melt if he continued living in the temperate climate of Linkon City.Â
Caleb had immediately applied for the program at Deepspace Aviation Administration after coming back and was accepted into their engineering program, news he had received over winter break. You could still remember him dancing around his pajamas early in the morning after reading the email on his phone. Heâd barged into your room, startling you from your deep slumber, and scooped you out of bed, spinning you around in his arms as he exuberantly announced his acceptance. Josephine had woken up from the ruckus, making her way up the stairs to investigate, and when she had reached your room, Caleb had tossed you back on your bed before picking up Josephine too, giving a quick circle that lifted her off her feet before carefully putting her back down. They found him baking shortly after; Caleb baked when he was happy.Â
Although you had applied to your fair share of colleges, you didnât hear back until spring, and you had sighed in relief when you saw the acceptance letter from Linkon University. It was exactly as youâd hoped. Even though Caleb would need to move to Skyhaven, it was still closer than Snowcrest, meaning you could see him every month if you wanted to.Â
There was still time before everyone went their separate ways. You knew that yet it felt like time had fallen into a strange vacuum where nothing was happening yet everything was happening all at once. Sometimes your pulse started to skyrocket for no reason at all. Thinking about college made you anxious just as it made you excited. New people, new challenges, the classes, getting lost on campus, all these thoughts swirled in your head like a snow globe being violently shaken.Â
You knew youâd make friends but there was a pang at the thought of not seeing your best friends. Suddenly it felt like you had taken all these past years for granted. You found yourself reminiscing over small aspects of your friendships with both boys. Like the time youâd turned down Zayne to go to the movies because it was a documentary, or when Caleb had asked for help to paint a model airplane and youâd refused because it was the third model that week. These minor indiscretions now felt like heavy bags of guilt weighing on your conscious.Â
Perhaps this is why you were all being separated now, you think self-deprecatingly. You had always thought you had forever with them and hadnât spent enough time with them when theyâd asked you. Now you didnât know when youâd see them next.Â
A knock on your door disrupts your thoughts and you turn to see Caleb standing there.Â
âReady to go?â
âWhere?â you ask blankly.
Caleb gives you a questioning look. âTo Zayneâs house. He got that new game and asked us to come over remember?â
It takes you a moment to recall, then you put a hand to your forehead. âYeah, thatâs right. I forgot.â You look down at your clothes and decide itâs not worth changing. It was hot outside, and it was Zayneâs house; heâd seen you in rattier things than the denim shorts and T-shirt you were currently wearing. You follow Caleb out of the house, the summer breeze whipping your faces as you walk. Caleb seemed content to walk in silence and after a few yards, you catch hold of his wrist, slowing down his pace.
âEverything ok?â He peers down at you and you nod yes.Â
âCaleb. Iâm sorry for all those times I refused to paint model airplanes with you.â
âWhat?â Thereâs levity in Calebâs voice. âWhat are you talking about?â
âIâm talking about those model airplanes you built. You asked me to paint them with you and I always found excuses to avoid it. And now I donât know when weâll do something like that again.â
Understanding fills Calebâs expression and he frees his wrist so he can drape his arm over your shoulders. âYouâre thinking too much again.â
âAm not.â
âSure you are. Weâre officially done with high school. Youâve been tweaking out about this since last year. How many times do I have to tell you, itâs going to be ok. And itâs not like weâre depending on carrier pigeons to communicate. Text me, call me, a million times a day if you want to. Iâll always reply.â
The feeling of his warm arm on the back of your neck makes you want to pull him into a hug right now. Caleb and Zayne were so different than most boys their age. Neither of them made you regret expressing vulnerability in front of them. You wondered if they would meet someone when they went to college. Zayne would probably get swept off his feet by another medical student. And CalebâŠCaleb exuded such candid energy that girls were always drawn to him. The thought made you uncomfortable for some reason and you push it out of your head.
âIf this apologizing thing is gonna continue, then please donât apologize to Zayne for that day I used my evol to hurl snowballs at him through his window.âÂ
You burst out laughing at the memory, Calebâs gravity control effortlessly pitching snowballs into Zayneâs room while you kept watch for the grown-ups. âWe ended up drenching his sheets that day,â you say in a sober voice. âI do feel kind of bad now.â
âWhatâs a little prank between friends hmm pipsqueak? Like that time Zayne and I let that possum into your room.â
âThat was you two?!â You jerk back and Caleb doubles over, cackling. âI screamed so loudly that the poor possum keeled over playing dead! But I thought it had really died and I had killed it! Grandma had to put it outside and then showed me how it got up before I stopped crying!âÂ
Caleb had tears in his eyes as you indignantly frowned at him. âI hate you,â you muttered and continued down the road towards Zayneâs house. Caleb jogs to catch up with you.
âYou donât hate us pipsqueak. Youâre going to remember all of this and be reminded that, despite everything, you had a good childhood.â Caleb puts his hand on your head. âI know I will.â
You roll your eyes and keep quiet but know that he was right.Â
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
Several rounds of Mario Kart later, the three of you are sprawled out on the floor in Zayneâs room. Both his parents were on-call that night and were working at the hospital.Â
âThereâs pizza for dinner,â Zayne says lazily as he gazes at the last few rays of the disappearing sun. Although it was well past dinner time, none of you felt hungry. There was something sweet about the calmness of this moment, and no one seemed willing to break it to go down to the kitchen. Youâre in between both boys staring at the ceiling fan which was rotating in a hypnotizingly soothing way. The soft whir of the blades was making you drowsy.Â
âWhen I was at camp, there were helicopters with blades like 50 times that size. The military choppers are huge.â Caleb says in a relaxed voice. âCanât believe Iâm going to be piloting those things in my third year.â
âThird year? Not after you graduate?â Zayne asks as the sunlight reflects in his amber-green eyes.Â
âNah. They start showing us flight basics in the third year. That way we can take the exam in the final year and weâre good to fly right after graduation.â
Zayne hums contemplatingly at the explanation.
âIâm guessing you wonât perform your first operation for another 10 years or so right?â you ask, enjoying the camaraderie.Â
âThey start you off with simple procedures that are low risk. But I want to be a cardiologist. Ten years might not be a bad estimate.â Zayne turns onto his side so that he can look at you. âDo you know what you want to do after graduating college?â
âI just graduated high school. Iâll figure it out along the way. Not everyone has answers about their long-term careers like you guys do.â Zayne gives you a small smile and you chuckle.Â
âDo you guys remember the summer right after I first moved in?â
âYeah. We were 6 years old. Why?â Zayne asks.Â
âRemember I wanted it to snow because it was too hot at the time?â
âOh yeah. Zayne and I came up with a little trick there didnât we?â Caleb also rolls to his side and props himself on his elbow. Fondness is etched all over his face at the memory.
âI think Iâll tell that story everywhere I go.â You gaze nostalgically at the ceiling. âMy two best friends literally made it snow for me.â
âIt was the first time we tested our evols together,â Zayne says reminiscingly. He looks over at Caleb. âWant to do it again?â
âWhat do you think pipsqueak? Will it make you happy?â
You close your eyes. âIt would. If you donât mind snowflakes falling all over your carpet Zayne.â
âThe heat should melt them before they touch the floor.â
The two boys look at each other, and then Zayne extends his palms toward the ceiling. Soft flakes of snow start to form on his palms, and then Caleb points a finger toward Zayne. The snowflakes lose their gravity, delicately floating into the air, and dancing near the ceiling. Both of them hold their evol until the air is filled with them.
âReady?â Caleb asks, and you can feel joy radiating from him.Â
âReady!â
Caleb disengages his evol and the snowflakes make their way back to earth, melting away as they do so. Even at this age, it was still magical, and you feel a sudden constriction in your throat.
âIâll miss you guys,â you murmur, then hold their hands as the remaining snow starts to fall around the three of you.Â
âWeâll do this for you whenever we meet,â Zayne says solemnly, observing your expression. You sniff and smile, your eyes overbright. You turn and find yourself face-to-face with Zayne. You hadnât realized he was so close, and you can see the surprise in his eyes. The world seems to stop spinning, frozen in the moment. In the blink of an eye, without thinking, you lean forward and clumsily press your lips to Zayneâs.Â
You werenât sure what you were thinking, but all you knew was that words werenât enough to describe how much youâd miss him. When you lean back, Zayneâs eyes are wide but he doesnât look displeased. You reach out to pat his cheek.
âIâll miss you.â
You hear shuffling on the carpet and suddenly feel warmth against your back as Caleb presses his body against yours. This wasnât an alien reaction to you; You and Caleb cuddled all the time, even slept in the same bed from time to time since you were kids. But somehow, his breath on the back of your neck was telling you this was different. You feel Calebâs lips press a soft kiss to your nape and you jerk at the sensation, trying to look at him over your shoulder.
âIâll miss you too my little one,â Caleb whispers, tipping your face to his by your chin. Enamored by the tenderness of his gaze, you allow him to give you a chaste kiss, your eyes fluttering closed at the feeling.
Your heart races as you become aware that you are sandwiched between Caleb and Zayne, and neither one is moving away. Instead, strong arms, one from each of them, come over your waist, effectively holding you into place.
âAre you ok with this?â Zayne murmurs into your ear. âUs showing you that weâll miss you?â Your eyes squeeze closed as you realize you have just experienced your first kiss. Correction. Kisses. Your face turns red under their watchful gazes but right now, you were consumed with the idea of being in this moment for as long as you could.
âYes.â You whisper the word out loud.Â
Hearing your breathless consent, both of them move impossibly closer, and you gasp as you feel Caleb softly kiss your ear. âTell us if you want to stop.â His warm breath tickles the sensitive skin and you squirm.Â
 Zayne strokes your arm and it sends tingles down your spine. You feel yourself going light-headed at their touch. They feel safe, and your mind enters into a state of connection. You can hear their heartbeats, the low, masculine sighs welling up from their throats as their hands gently explore the contours of your body over your clothes.Â
Your legs were the most exposed part of you, the shorts having ridden up from all the movement playing video games, and rolling around on the carpet. Itâs Zayne who boldly touches your knee first, sending a jitter of electricity up into your core. The blood rushes to your ears, and you almost jump as Caleb chuckles before sinking his teeth into one of the lobes. The little nip was unfamiliar, but it felt good and your hand grips the front of Zayneâs T-shirt as the minor sting passes.
âAre you feeling hot?â Caleb moves some hair away from your shoulder to kiss and lick the crook of your neck. âYour ears are so red right now.â His words cause you to flush. Your skin felt uncomfortably warm, and your heart was pounding inside your chest as their hands stroked every inch of you. A strange throb was beginning to make itself present between your legs now; it was in time to your heartbeat, as though your sex had developed a rapid pulse of its own. You move to try and get comfortable and your panties chafe against your folds.Â
âWhat is it? Zayne sneaks his hand over your waist and onto your back, his head leaning forward to press a kiss to your forehead.
âI feelâŠâ your voice trails as you struggle to find words to describe it. âLight. But alsoâŠstrained? Like Iâm hot everywhere. And tingly.â You knew you must have sounded ridiculous but Zayne gives a comforting pat on the small of your back.Â
âArousal,â he murmurs, pushing your hair away from your face. âAll the signs point to that. According to my pre-med textbooks anyway.âÂ
âOhâŠâÂ
Arousal.Â
Youâd learned that word in biology but you had never thought about what the implications of it would be in the real world. Zayne peppers your face with small kisses and your eyes flutter shut as they reach your cheeks, your chin, the tip of your nose, and then finally your lips. He hovers uncertainly for a second before he does so, and it feels like a little light has been ignited inside of you. His lips were soft, warm, and unparted. Gaining courage, and your curiosity getting the better of you, you open your mouth and hear a groan issue from Zayne. Experimentally you give him your tongue, exploring the crevices of his mouth, and feel a delicious, liquidy pull, in your lower abdomen. Excitement pulses through your body as Zayneâs tongue timidly touches yours, participating in the erotic dance as you kiss.Â
Caleb has now left kisses all over your neck and shoulders, and you can feel his hands starting to grow mischievous and he walks them along the front of your collarbone, starting to stroke down on the swells of flesh under your Tshirt but not daring to cup them completely.
You and Zayne part and his eyes are smoldering, green embers growing in the irises. âI donât want to continue this on the floor.âÂ
Your brain is in a haze and it takes a second for you to register what he had said, and you hasten to move, but are prevented from doing so as Caleb hooks his arms under your upper body, and Zayne gently cradles your legs from the knees below. They lovingly move you to the bed and resume their positions on either side of you.
The softness of the bed is alluring, and all of you sink into it, you feel their hands flirting with the edge of your T-shirt. Feeling shy, you glance up at them and raise your arms. Taking your cue, Zayne pulls off the garment, then he and Caleb follow suit, discarding their shirts with yours. You drink in the sight of their bare upper bodies. You had seen them half-naked before when youâd gone to the pool and the beach with them, seen their bodies wet with water and sweat. But the longing and hunger in their eyes as they looked at you made it feel like you were seeing them differently; now as men rather than childhood companions.Â
Goosebumps form over your skin as your upper half is exposed to them, and you tentatively reach out to put a hand on each of their chests. They tremble at your touch, and the knowledge emboldens you, knowing they were as affected by you as you were by them. The direct skin-on-skin contact was soothing, their warm, firm bodies pressing up against your softness. Caleb traces a finger along the inner crease of your cleavage, then looks at you for permission. You nod, curving towards him so he can unhook your bra. A mixture of nervous excitement fills you as the small piece of fabric slips off your body and you quickly cling to Caleb, hiding your breasts from view.Â
He strokes your hair, pressing a kiss to your temple. âItâs ok my little one. Iâm sure youâre beautiful.âÂ
You feel a persistent ache in your breasts and press up against Calebâs hard chest, surprised at how the ache lessens as you do so. Caleb lets out a low, guttural groan, and at the same time, Zayne closes in to kiss down your back, licking random little lines on your skin that have you pressing deeper into Calebâs body. You gasp and wriggle in surprise as Zayne bites down on the curve of your waist, then soothes the bite with his thumb.
âWonât you let us see you?â Zayneâs deep voice requests you, and feeling like youâd burst into flames from the embarrassment, you finally let go of Caleb and lie back on the bed, covering your eyes with your hands as you do so. You hear their collective breaths being drawn as they take in the view of your soft breasts, the nipples hard from their affections.Â
âHow cute,â you hear Caleb growl. Your breath catches in your throat as you feel your breasts being cupped and squeezed, and then suddenly, light floods your vision as Caleb tugs your hand away from your eyes.
âAw look at you. Youâre blushing.â He teases but itâs said with gentleness. Zayne watches your expressions intently, and you let out a moan of pleasure as they continue to play with your breasts.Â
âAre you enjoying it?â Zayneâs voice cuts through the buzz in your head and you nod, a heady twirl of sensation shooting up your spine. Your toes curl into the mattress as they mindfully pull your nipples, feeling your arousal grow as they do so. You nod breathlessly at Zayneâs question and feel an urgent pulsing between your legs. Youâre desperate to touch and relieve yourself. You were no stranger to pleasuring yourself after all but could you do it with these two watching?
The thought sends an arrow of lust straight into the deepest depths of your core. Youâre about to speak up but all that comes out is a noise of desire as Caleb licks your nipple, savoring the taste of your skin before suckling the little bud into his mouth. Zayne repeats the action on the other side and you feel like you canât catch your breath, each soft suck sending you into a dizzying spiral. You feel like nothing is solid under you like youâre floating on a cloud, where the only thing that existed was the sweet stimulation of their mouths on your body. You try to discreetly rub your aching clit against your panties, the barely there friction making you feel like you might go insane.Â
You shiver as Caleb releases your moistened peak, caressing your hair and kissing his way down to your navel. Both their large hands stroke the length of your legs, intensifying the need building inside your core. Your nails sink into the covers as you quiver under their touch.Â
âFeeling ok?â Zayne cups your cheek as he notices your tension. You crack your eyes open and nod.
âI feel hot. I needâŠI need toâŠâ You blush as you try to form the words.
âWhat?â Caleb prompts you and moves back up to take your hands, stroking your palms. âTell us.â
I needâŠmoreâŠâ you manage to say, then gasp as Zayne ghosts your belly button before his hand dips below the waistband of your shorts. Your breath hitches as he strokes the soaked gusset of your panties, just a few inches shy of your clit.
âShow us.â Caleb catches your lips in an unexpected kiss.Â
Zayneâs hand withdraws and he slides down your shorts over your legs, little ripples of electricity running through your body as he does so.Â
âYouâre so wet.â Calebâs voice is laced with arousal as he moves toward your feet and sees the patch of moisture on your panties.
âItâs natural,â Zayne reassures you and squeezes your hand and you nod, your embarrassment giving away to your instincts. Your hips raise slightly as Caleb removes your panties, displaying your swollen sex to their eyes. Zayne moves next to Caleb as you part your legs, and take a finger into your leaking core, drawing up the slick towards your clit. Whimpers leave you as you stroke light circles onto the swollen bud.Â
âThatâs so hot,â Caleb says as he watches the erotic view in front of him. Zayne quietly observes you for a few minutes, then you feel a jolt burst through you as he reaches his fingers into your drenched folds and copies your moves.
âLike this?âÂ
âY-YesâŠâ you whisper breathlessly, your legs parting shamelessly to allow him better access. The pads of his fingertips were gentle, and the sensation of someone else touching you was so starkly different from when you did it. The air becomes balmy, and you writhe passionately under his gentle ministrations.
âSuch a good girl for us.â Caleb strokes your thighs and you moan as your hips roll, trying to reap all the pleasure you can get. Your feet plant into the mattress and suddenly, you feel a different set of fingers, a little thicker than Zayneâs, softly probing at the wetness of your core.Â
âBreathe for me baby girl.â You hear Calebâs encouragement and breathe deeply as he inserts his fingers into you. It was done carefully but you were already lucidly wet and his fingers sink in with ease. Your moans start to keen as Caleb slowly strokes your inner walls, his movements uncertain but soft as he watches your face for discomfort. Zayne continues circling your clit and the sensations from both of them were driving you mad.
You feel yourself clench, your body tensing under their tender ministrations, pleasurable mewls filling the air as they work your body to the edge. The separate sensations were unlike anything you could have ever imagined in your wildest fantasies. Even when youâd touched yourself before, youâd imagined a faceless stranger. But now with these two, it was even more heady than you could imagine.
âDonât stop.â You pant as you feel your body tip into the abyss. They donât relent and keep up the pace and your eyes squeeze closed in ecstasy as an orgasm builds and explodes inside you. Your body quakes from the pulses of delight flowing through you and your sobs fill the quiet bedroom as you fall apart, a puddle of tangled, sensual desire.
âHow was it?â Your chest rises and falls as you try to catch your breath and you see Caleb curiously lick at his fingers, tasting the fluid collected from your body. The sight was so lewd and yet arousing, and you canât help but stare as he cleans up his digits.
âGood it wasâŠgood.âÂ
Caleb turns away and you see him fiddling with the fabric of his sweats and something clicks in your head. âAre you bothâŠ?â
You glance down and Zayne doesnât try to hide it, but he averts his eyes shyly as you see the hard bulge in his shorts. Slowly, you roll over and crawl over to them. âCan I see?â you ask curiously, and a nervous glance flashes over their faces before they oblige. Your eyes widen as their cocks spring free of their confines, thick, veiny, and pulsing with heat.Â
Your hands move automatically, reaching out to stroke them, and both of them hiss at your touch, your small, soft hands already pushing their inexperienced bodies toward the edge of bliss. Youâre surprised at the firmness, and the velvety the skin was stretched over their arousals. Growing bold, you give a slight squeeze, and both of them groan, the noises heavy with want.
It emboldens you, hearing the desperation in their voices, seeing the way drops of pearlescent fluid start to form in their slits. Your mind craved to know what they tasted like, how their desire might feel on your tongue. Leaning forward, you cautiously taste Caleb first. His abdomen tightens, a low moan escaping from him and he grips the covers.
âCa-carefulâŠâ he says in a trembling voice. You hear the thin restraint in his words and repeat the action on Zayne, tongue darting out to sample him. Zayne lets out a huff followed by what sounded like a snarl.Â
Drunk with the power you held over them, you continued to test their boundaries, sampling, sucking, giving soft kitten licks, never taking more than a few inches of them into your mouth at a time. Their patience was wearing thin and their eyes had a primal haze to them when you dared to look up.
Caleb jerks you away from him, momentarily stunning you before youâre wrapped up in his strong arms, and he pins you underneath him, his erection grazing your thigh as he does so. His body was like a furnace and you nuzzle your face into his chest, his heart beating like a caged bird in his chest. He moans as he pushes his hips against you, trying to soothe the ache in his cock.Â
Zayne shifts towards your head, his facade of control slipping as lust pours into his system. You reach out a hand to stroke him again and he bites his lip, eyes fluttering closed.Â
âI thinkâŠIâm ready,â you say quietly and 2 pairs of eyes fixate on you.
âAre you sure?â Calebâs tone is ragged as he tries to control himself from being selfish.Â
You nod and stroke his hair with your free hand. âIâm positive. With you twoâŠIâm not scared.â
Caleb laughs nervously. âGot us all wired up here baby girl. You think this is something I have practice with?â
You sense his insecurity and murmur, âIt doesnât really matter.âÂ
Caleb takes a deep breath, then moves, your legs spreading apart as he adjusts, grabbing his cock and probing around near your entrance. You tense slightly and feel Zayne move so that he can put your head on his lap. He strokes your face, then leans down to kiss you, easing your worries, and you feel your core flutter in anticipation.
Caleb finally notches in, and he pushes with care, pausing as he hears a muffled gasp escape from you, spilling into Zayneâs mouth. The sensation was strange, it didnât hurt nearly as bad as you thought it would, but it wasnât the most comfortable either. It felt like unused muscles were being stretched inside you, then suddenlyâŠyou were split apart and he was there, filling an unfamiliar cavern that had been untouched all these years.
âFuckâŠâ he hisses as he feels the tightness of your walls, the wet clench of them around his cock. Calebâs movements are shaky as he soaks in the glorious feeling of your body, not daring to push too far in for fear of losing control. Your eyes are clouding over as you gaze up at Zayneâs face, your body rocking with each of Calebâs thrusts. You moan loudly as he dares to bottom out once, then he quickly pulls out, his breathing shallow.Â
âI canâtâŠNot in youâŠâ he mumbles, then starts to pump himself in his hand. You cup Zayneâs cheek, and understanding, he moves carefully between your legs. He kisses your pubic bone, and like Caleb, strokes himself before using his hand to guide himself inside you. You were prepared for the sensation this time but marveled at how different Zayne felt inside you compared to Caleb. Your pussy stretches and accommodates him easily, the muscles relaxed and loose as he enters.Â
Zayne brushes away hair from your face, his movements tender like Calebâs and just as inexperienced. To you, however, they felt amazing, and youâre in awe of the human body, the way it could feel and bask in these sweet feelings and touches. Zayneâs breath grows ragged with each passing thrust and all too soon, heâs pulling out as well.
The sight of both them pumping their lengths, of knowing you put them in this frenzied sexual haze, stroked your ego. Caleb lets go first, his nose scrunching up in pleasure as he releases his load, the warm sticky fluid splattering on your belly as it happens. Zayne follows not too long after, jets of seed spilling out of his swollen tip to join Calebâs.
The rest of the night was a blur. You remember being carried to the shower, by which one, you couldn't remember. They had washed you, murmuring how youâd be their girl forever. After helping you dry off, Zayne had lent you a change of clothes, and you fallen asleep wearing his hoodie and shorts, both of which were baggy and loose. It was past midnight when Caleb had roused you, reminding you that you needed to get back to Grandmaâs house. He packed your clothes into a plastic bag, and after you had hugged and kissed Zayne goodnight one more time, heâd held your hand on the way home. Once back at your own home, Caleb had led you to his bed, and held you snugly against him as you fell asleep once more.
It was the perfect ending to the summer. You felt deeply content and sighed against Calebâs chest. It was rare to find one person that loved you so wholly but two? That was nothing short of a miracle.
àȘââŽàȘââŽàȘââŽ
~End Flashback~
The group of women were gazing at you in wonder, their cheeks flushed as the wine theyâd been sipping intoxicated their system. Taraâs eyes were as wide as dinner plates.Â
âAnd?â she prompts in an awed hush as you conclude your story.
âAnd what?â
âDonât play dumb!â Tara pouts. âWhere are they? Are you guysâŠin a poly situation?â Shr grins slyly.
Her question makes your heart twist painfully. Trying to keep your composure, you finish the rest of your wine. Taking a deep breath, you say the final, painful, part of the story.Â
âMy grandmaâs house was blown up during the attack on Bloomshore district last year.â
Taraâs eyes change from teasing to horrified. âIâm so sorry!â She covers her mouth as the rest of the group becomes somber at your admission.Â
âMy grandma and Caleb didnât survive the blast.â Your voice trembles.
âAndâŠZayne?â Taraâs voice is hushed.
âZayne and I lost touch. He used to send letters regularly then, his last one to me, stated that heâd been asked to be part of a research program for developing a cure for Protocore Syndrome. It was some sort of high-clearance project, privately funded. He stopped writing after that.â
âNo!â Tara looks absolutely beside herself. âSo Zayne is aliveâŠbut you donât know where he is?â
You shake your head no and excuse yourself, escaping to the balcony. None of the women follow you and youâre grateful for the moment of privacy. The night wind whips your hair and you breathe it in, the air feeling fortifying despite the chill.Â
The seasons might change, but to you, theyâre all the same. In your mind, youâre stuck in a perpetual state of summer, the memories of your two lovers echoing through your mind.Â
beating hearts - smut, fluff (4.1k)
âł following the aftermath of his match, sylus shows you how much he adores you.
close to you - smut, fluff, fwb 2 lovers (4.9k)
âł a sleepy morning with sylus results in unravelled feelings.
red tape - smut, mma!sylus (8.8k)
âł the man you're in charge of is somewhat of a handful (...and a mouthful).
sweet summer breeze - smut (5k)
âł date night with sylus gets out of hand.
stardust (series)
resonance | part one - smut, fluff (4.5k)
âł with the aether core's auction quickly approaching, you're growing desperate to resonate with sylus. fortunately for you, he has a suggestion... even if it is less conventional.
a lust for love | part two - smut, fluff (5.7k)
âł ever since you've left the N109 zone, you find yourself missing a certain white-haired man.
you'll warm the night (series - ongoing)
i only bleed for him | chapter one - smut, angst, beyond cloudfall myth (4.5k)
âł admist the blooming flowers in tarus city, the dragon claims his beloved.
headcanons/drabbles
ex-husband!sylus
cockwarming with sylus
mma!sylus
êȘà§ LI SHEN | ZAYNE
blush wine - smut, fluff (5.5k)
âł a pressing personal issue has you turning to zayne in desperation. he is a doctor, after all.
in every life - mild smut, fluff (1.3k)
âł zayne wants to spend the morning of his birthday with you.
take a chance with me - smut, fluff (4.4k)
âł zayne gets called into work, so you bring him dinner.
the emperor's affection (series) - historical au
the first fall of snow | part one - smut (7.7k)
âł the emperor isn't interested in his concubines, but an encounter with you is enough to change his mind.
keep my hand in yours | part two - smut, fluff (6.9k)
âł the emperor is intent on convincing you that you are worthy enough to be his empress.
âł The amount of links and mentions on my fic recommendation list has officially broken the post, so I have decided to create seperate posts for all of the respective fandoms from my fic recommendation list! â„ïž
âł I am so incredibly sorry for having to tag everyone again, I promise this is hopefully the last time I'll have to mass tag everyone :,) â„ïž
âł Creators who are tagged on this list more than once, will only be tagged once as to not clog up their inbox with mentions â„ïž
âł If you wish to have your fic removed fom this list, please don't hesitate to send me an ask â„ïž à«ź ˶ᔠᔠá”˶ á
âł đđđđđđđđđđ : Just because a certain character is on this list, DOES NOT automatically mean I simp for them. They might just be on this list because I liked the fic itself and not the character â„ïž
đđđđđđ!đđđđđ - Sylus x Reader / By : @/kisstrela
đđđ'đ đđđđ đđ - Zayne / Sylus / Xavier / Rafayel x Reader / By : @luvzayne
đđđđđđđ - Sylus / Xavier / Rafayel x Reader / By : @daosies
đđđ + đđđđ đđđđđđ - Zayne x Reader / By : @deusfoundry
đđđđ'đ đđđ đđđđđ đđđđ - Zayne / Sylus / Xavier / Rafayel x Reader / By : @odoraful
đđđđđđđđ (đđ)đđđđ đđđđđđđđ - Sylus x Reader / By : @chuluoyi
đđđđ đđ đđđđđđđđđ - Sylus x Reader / By : @/chuluoyi
đđđđđđđđ đđđđđđđđđ - Sylus x Reader / By : @/chuluoyi
đđđ đđđ đđđ đđđ đđđđ - Sylus x Reader / By : @/chuluoyi
đđđđđđđđ đđ đđđđđđđđ - Zayne x Reader / By : @/chuluoyi
đđđđđ đ đđđđ - Zayne / Sylus / Xavier / Rafayel x Reader / By : @shomatoriashi
đđđđđđđ đđđđđđđ - Xavier x Reader / By : @manikas-whims
đ đđđđ đđđ - Xavier x Reader / By : @mephisto-reporting
đđđđđđđđđđ đđđđđđđđđđđ - Rafayel x Reader / By : @/mephisto-reporting
đđđđđ - Zayne x Reader / By : @winterstelltales
đđđđđđ đđđđđđđđđđ - Zayne x Reader / By : @sylusdoll
đđđđđđđđ - Sylus x Reader / By : @misswynters
đđđđđđđđđ - Zayne x Reader / By : @rumeras
đđđđđ đđđđ - Zayne x Reader / By : @plutotheplum
đđđđđđđđđ đđđđ - Zayne / Sylus / Xavier / Rafayel x Reader / By : @ollyissleppy
đđđđđđ đđđđđ - Sylus x Reader / By : @softieyuume
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c.w. should I label this as improper use of medicine? đ, very suggestive, fluffy, MDNI, 1k+ words, fem reader
In the softest hour before dawn, when the town of Linkon lay wrapped in the hush of a blue so tender it felt almost sacred, Zayne sat at the edge of your bed, the early light casting his form in gentle shades of indigo and sapphire. Shadows stretched long as as he carefully buttoned his shirt, his fingers moving with a deliberate rhythm, hoping not to disturb you.
In that quiet intimacy, your arms, weighted with sleep, reached for him. He startled, the tension in his shoulders easing when he turned to find you awake, your eyes carrying the gentleness of lingering dreams. âGo back to sleep,â he whispered, his voice a lullaby. His hand slid softly over your hair, and then he gently adjusted the blanket around your frame.
"Mmm, so you're the type of guy to see yourself out after spending the night with a woman?" you murmured, a playful edge laced with drowsiness.
Zayne let out a soft hmph, the sound warm and tinged with a hint of amusement. "I'm the type of man who has a very busy day ahead of him," he replied, the corners of his mouth twitching into a smile.
His hands moved to work on his tie, his fingers maneuvering the silk with skilled efficiency. "You," he added, pausing for a moment to look down at his work, "have the luxury of staying in bed, asleep, for another couple of hours."
You raised, the blanket slipping and pooling at your waist and exposing the erotic canvas of your skin in the hues of healing.
Mauve hickies adorned the column of your neck like a necklace. Plum love bites, puffy and tender, marred the smooth swells of your breasts, peeking out from your white lace bra. On your waist, a ghostly imprint of a possessive hand lingered.
Zayne froze, his hands clutching his loosened tie as his jaw tensed almost unseen. His eyes, however, remained thawed and warm to shift with such frequentness to drink you in.
He blinked rapidly before resuming his motion, loosening the tie around his throat as if it was the reason behind his loss of breath. He inhaled before he gently beckoned you to lay back down and attempted to tuck the covers back over you.
"Don't sit up. You need your sleep," he said softly, his voice slightly deeper than usual. Despite his words, there was a hint of guilt and tenderness in his tone, betraying his concern.
You pushed aside the covers and leaned into his shoulder, your fingers curling into the hem of his shirt. âLemme... Lemme iron your shirt.â
Zayneâs resolve faltered as you pressed closer, your warmth seeping through the fabric of his sleeve. The scent of your love making still lingered on you.
âYou expect me to think you can hold an iron when you can barely hold your eyes open," he said, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. His hand found your cheek, his thumb brushing gently over your skin. âYou'll have me hurrying up the process so I could rush you to the ER.â
You blinked up at him, your eyes heavy but earnest. âCan I have some water?â
He sighed but rose without complaint, returning moments later with a glass of cold water in one hand and a couple of pills in the other. Setting the water on the nightstand, he sank back onto the edge of the bed. His gaze swept over you, taking in the exhaustion etched across your featuresâthe faint lines of fatigue, the dark shadows under your eyes. He knew how much your work as a hunter drained you, though he also knew now wasnât the time for a lecture.
Which, of course, didnât stop him.
"The first one is ibuprofen for pain relief," his eyes flickering to the bruise blooming on your throat, "and the other one is a multivitamin, which, by the looks of the full capsule in your medicine cabinet, is one you should've been taking daily, prescribed by your doctor."
You pouted, your voice soft. âI just forgot. And they taste weird.â
"You forget a lot of things," he said, his tone half-chiding, half-concerned. His fingers deftly cracked open the vitamin capsule, holding the pill up between you. "They're medicine, not candy. They're not supposed to taste delicious."
âWhat are youâ?â
âMaking sure you actually take it.â His hand tipped your chin upward, thumb and forefinger firm but careful. His voice dipped into something commanding. âOpen.â
Your lips parted, your eyes meeting his as he leaned closer. He placed the pill on your tongue, but the flick of your it against his fingertip drew an audible hitch from him.
Zayne froze for a heartbeat, his eyes darkening with something unreadable, something heated. His thumb lingered on your lower lip, tracing its curve as his gaze held yours.
âSwallow,â he murmured, his voice rougher now, his breath brushing against your skin.
You obeyed, your throat working as the pill went down. His eyes tracked the movement, a flicker of satisfaction crossing his face. His thumb stayed at your lip a moment longer before he pulled back and handed you the water.
âGood girl,â he said softly, the words laced with a low, almost teasing warmth.
You drained the glass in one go, setting it back on the nightstand with a faint clink. Your eyes met his again, the weariness in them replaced with a spark of something else entirely.
âNow Iâm really not tired,â you said, your voice breaking the quiet tension in the room.
Zayne leaned back, a chuckle rumbling in his chest. He was aware of the drowsiness that was about to settle in soon, thanks to the ingredient in the pills named Diphenhydramine.
Zayne pulled the covers up to your chin, his fingers gently tucking the fabric around you. He took a moment to admire the sight of you, wrapped up in your nest of warmth, the faint warm light of the early morning seeping through the windows, clearing the chillness of the blue. He should have left a while ago.
"It'll hit you soon," he said. "You'll be dozing off before you know it."
"Rest," he murmured. His hand lingered, squeezing your shoulder gently before pulling away. "I have to go."
"Wait," you said, tugging lightly on his sleeve. "Have a nice day at work."
"I will."
"And donât eat too many sweets. Remember, your dentist said sugar-free," you added, smiling softly.
"Iâm sure one pastry wonât hurt," he teased.
"Your lunch is in the fridge... donât forget it," you murmured through a yawn. Zayne has been deliberately leaving his lunch behind for weeks now, a thin excuse for you to stop by later and see you again.
"I wonât," he lied smoothly.
Your breathing slowed, the weight of sleep pulling you under.
Zayne feigned a glance at his watch --and God, he really should've left by now-- pretending he had important duties that needed tending to, but secretly reveled in the extra few minutes of banter and banter with you.
Then it happened.
"I love you," you whispered, the words tumbling out mid-yawn, the 'you' stretching softly as your eyelids drifted shut. It was the first time youâd said it, the confession slipping free without a second thought.
Zayne froze, his heart stuttering in his chest. For a moment, he just stood there, watching you as you surrendered to sleep. It's the medication talking, he silently told himself, even as the words echoed in his mind, sending a warmth spreading through his veins.
He gently placed his hand on your head, his fingers carding through your hair in a soothing manner as he watched your eyes flutter closed.
Zayne watched as your breathing slowed into the soft, even rhythm of sleep, your face relaxed and peaceful. He lingered for a few more seconds, his gaze tracing the lines of your face, committing them to memory. He bent down to kiss your forehead. "I love you, too. I'll see you in the afternoon."
As gently as possible, Zayne removed his hand from your head, the touch light as he slowly made his way to the door.
Plot: Reader becomes jealous of Sylus and MC's closeness, distancing herself and seeking comfort in another LI. Sylus notices her growing distance and takes action. Based on this request.
Pairing: Sylus x Non MC reader
Content Warning: Insecurities, injuries, mention of blood, jealousy, angst, hurt/comfort
Note: Reader is not the MC of the game. I think I got quite carried away writing this because I am a sucker for angst.
The faint hum of the air condition echoed through the Onychinus base, its opulent, luxurious atmosphere doing little to distract from the knot twisting in your stomach. You stood across from Luke and Kieran, their crow masks tilted slightly as if to gauge your reaction.
"Boss isn't here today," Luke said casually, his hands tucked into his pockets. "Heâs in Linkon, Boss manâs got other things to handle."
Kieran, his mask tilted slightly to the side, gave a confused grunt. "But I thought he was meeting with her...?"
Luke raised a brow, correcting him. "No, no, he was meeting with Miss Hunter."
Miss Hunter.
The words hit you like a sledgehammer, even though they shouldnât have. You were a hunter too, an informant who had been feeding Sylus critical intel on the associationâs movements for two years now. But she was different. Special.
Captain Jennaâs star pupil, with her rare Anhaunsen-class Resonance Evol, was someone Sylus had spent weeks trying to connect with, both literally and emotionally. You werenât blind to the necessity of it; resonating with her was crucial for his goals, ones he hadnât entirely shared with you but that you trusted him to pursue.
Trusted him. Loved him.
You forced a tight smile. "Thanks for the update. I'll let you two get back to it."
Luke and Kieran exchanged a glance, but you were already walking away, the echo of your boots swallowed by the hum of the base.
The ride back to Linkon was supposed to clear your mind. It didnât.
The cool wind whipped against your face, but all it did was sting the tears pooling in your eyes. The road stretched endlessly ahead, yet the pressure in your chest only grew. Sylus hadnât seen you in two months. Two months of unanswered calls and messages reduced to half-hearted responses when they came at all.
You understood why he was focused on her. She was crucial to his plans. She was everything you werenât: poised, pretty, powerful, and, most importantly, someone he needed.
But understanding didnât make it hurt any less.
The world blurred around you as your thoughts spiraled. You had always known your place in Sylusâ life. You were the informant, the quiet insider who helped him stay two steps ahead of the hunters. Somewhere along the way, though, you had fallen for him. For the man who wasnât as cold and calculated as others believed. It had been two long years since you started working with Sylus. Two years filled with secrecy, lies, and hidden truths. But over those years, you'd found yourself tangled in emotions for him that you couldnât shake. Sylus, with his cold authority, his dangerous smile, his complex nature⊠He was all you could think about. He wasnât as dismissive as people thought. He had a way of looking at you when no one was watchingâa fleeting softness that you cherished, even if you couldnât be certain if it was real.
The glass windows glinted under the midday sun, and your breath hitched as you looked inside.
Sylus was there. With her.
They sat at a small table, a deck of Kitty cards spread between them. He was leaning back, his smirk in full display as she laughed at something he said. It was the kind of laugh that reached her eyes, the kind of moment you had only ever dreamed of sharing with him.
You froze, your hands tightening on your helmet.
For a fleeting second, you wanted to march inside and demand answers. To ask him why he had time to play cards but couldnât return your calls. To tell him how his absence had hollowed you out.
But you didnât.
He looks so happy... you thought bitterly, swallowing the lump in your throat.
The truth gnawed at you. Every interaction, every ignored message, every unread notification on your phoneâit was because of her. Because Sylus had more important things to do. She was the one who mattered now. She was the one who he had to resonate with, had to bond with, had to make fall for him.
And you? You were just a pawn, a toolâforgotten. And there you were. Alone. Watching through a window, the warmth of the cafe contrasting the cold, empty feeling in your stomach. He hadnât even bothered to let you know he was back. He was with her. You couldnât bear to watch any longer, but you couldnât look away either. It felt like the world was spinning faster than you could catch up, and you were left stranded, dizzy, and abandoned.
Instead, you turned away, your chest tight and vision blurred. The world felt suffocating, the weight of your unspoken feelings dragging you down as you climbed back onto your bike.
It was for the best, right?
You couldnât keep doing this. You couldnât keep waiting for him, couldnât keep fooling yourself that there was something real between you two. He was busy. He had her. And you.. well, you didnât even know why you bothered anymore.
The ride back to your apartment was a blur of taillights and muffled engine noise. The cityâs glow that usually brought you some sense of comfort felt glaring and alien tonight. By the time you made it inside, the suffocating silence of your small space was overwhelming.
For someone who prided herself on being strong and independent, you barely made it to your couch before the sobs overtook you. Hot, angry tears streamed down your face as you clutched a pillow to your chest, trying in vain to keep your cries muffled. It felt as though something within you had been ripped apart, leaving an aching, hollow void that throbbed with every thought of him.
Every chime of your phone made you flinch, hope briefly sparking to life, only to be cruelly snuffed out when the screen lit up with messages from othersâwork updates, pointless notifications, or friends checking in. Nothing from him. Of course, there wouldnât be.
You wiped at your face, your chest tightening as you scrolled through the last few conversations youâd had with Sylus. They were short, clipped responses. A "thanks" here, an "Iâm busy" there. Youâd convinced yourself for weeks that he wasnât brushing you off, that his focus was just elsewhere. But deep down, you knew. Youâd always known.
You werenât as important to him as he was to you.
That realization settled over you like a heavy blanket, suffocating and final. And yet, you tried to convince yourself it was okay. He doesnât owe me anything, you told yourself, though the thought only twisted the knife deeper. Heâs free to choose who he spends his time with.
But it didnât stop the tears.
The days that followed were a haze of exhaustion and numbness. You threw yourself into your work, spending long hours tracking and confronting wanderers. The physical exhaustion helped, even if just a little. At least when you were in the middle of a fight, the pain in your chest was drowned out by the adrenaline coursing through your veins.
Still, the nights were the worst. Alone in your apartment, the quiet crept in like a suffocating fog. You tried to distract yourselfâreading, cleaning, even organizing old mission reports. Anything to keep your mind from drifting back to him. But it was impossible.
Each time you saw his name in your contacts, you hesitated. Your thumb hovered over the call button more times than you cared to admit, but the fear of hearing his indifferent voice stopped you every time. What would you even say? That you missed him? That you wanted to see him? That youâd fallen for him, even though you knew it would never be mutual?
No. You couldnât do that to yourself.
You worked harder, pushed yourself further. Every wanderer you fought became a stand-in for your frustrations, your insecurities. You told yourself that if you could just stay busy enough, the ache would go away. But no matter how many missions you completed or how many late nights you spent staring at your phone, the weight in your chest never fully lifted.
By the end of the week, you were exhaustedâphysically and emotionally. But you were surviving. Barely. The bell above the door jingled softly as you pushed into the chocolatierâs shop, the rich scent of cocoa and vanilla wrapping around you like a warm embrace. The day had been gruelingâhours of chasing leads, a narrow escape from a particularly aggressive wanderer, and not a single bite of food since morning. Your stomach growled in protest, a sharp reminder that youâd been running on fumes for too long.
Rows of meticulously crafted chocolates gleamed beneath the glass counter, their perfect swirls and shimmering finishes almost too beautiful to eat. Almost. You leaned forward slightly, scanning the display, your reflection ghosting over the pristine surface.
Dark chocolate truffles. Raspberry ganache. Caramel hazelnut clusters. The options were overwhelming, and your indecision felt heavier than it shouldâve. Your chest still ached from the lingering emotions youâd been suppressing all week. The quiet joy of the shop felt alien, like stepping into a world you no longer belonged to.
Just pick something and go, you thought, your fingers tightening on the strap of your bag. But the choices seemed endless, each one whispering promises of sweetness you werenât sure you deserved.
"If youâre struggling," a soft, measured voice spoke behind you, "the pistachio crĂšme chocolate is an excellent choice."
Startled, you turned, your gaze falling on a man standing a few steps away. Tall and lean, he exuded an understated confidence that was both intimidating and captivating. Dark hair fell in against his forehead, and sharp hazel-green eyes, softened by gold flecks peered at you from behind thin-framed glasses. His white doctorâs coat was open, revealing a simple black shirt beneath, and he held a small paper bag in one hand.
You blinked, caught off guard by both his suggestion and his presence. "Oh, uh⊠thank you," you stammered, trying not to sound as flustered as you felt. "Iâll⊠Iâll try that."
The shopkeeper nodded and carefully packed your selection as you stole another glance at the stranger. There was an air of calm authority about him, a quiet assurance that made you feel oddly exposed, like he could see straight through you.
He waited patiently as the shopkeeper handed you your bag, but just as you were about to leave, his voice cut through the quiet againâthis time, more direct. "Chocolates shouldnât be your first meal of the day."
The statement was delivered without malice, his tone stoic and matter-of-fact, yet it hit like a stone to the chest. Your lips parted in shock, the question forming before you could stop it: How does he know? But before you could say anything, he was already moving toward the door. The bells jingled softly as it closed behind him, leaving you standing frozen in place. The strangerâs words lingered, intertwining with the rest of your messy emotions. Your fingers clenched the small bag of chocolates as you tried to process the brief encounter.
A soft gleam on the floor caught your attention, breaking your spiraling thoughts. A wallet, its sleek leather worn but well-kept, lay just inches from where the man had stood. You knelt and picked it up, your heart thudding as you opened it to check for identification.
The name embossed on his hospital ID was like a jolt: Dr. Zayne. Your eyes widened. Doctor Zayne? The name was familiarâa renowned surgeon whose skills and precision were legendary, often described as a miracle worker. Youâd imagined someone older, more weathered, not⊠this.
For a moment, you stared at the ID, piecing together the puzzle of the composed, enigmatic man who had called you out so effortlessly. You tried the number listed on a card tucked into his wallet, but it rang unanswered, the sterile monotone only adding to your frustration.
"Of course, he wouldnât answer," you muttered under your breath, chewing your lip as you debated your next move. The idea of keeping his wallet overnight felt wrong, and leaving it here in the shop seemed equally careless.
That left one option.
The hospital loomed ahead as you approached, its towering structure illuminated against the evening sky. Anxiety gnawed at your insides, twisting with every step you took through the sterile white halls. You werenât sure why you felt so on edgeâmaybe it was the overwhelming sense of inadequacy that had been haunting you lately, or maybe it was the lingering impression of Zayneâs knowing gaze.
At the reception desk, you hesitated, gripping the wallet tightly as you cleared your throat. "Hi, um, Iâm here to return something for Dr. Zayne. He⊠accidentally dropped this."
The receptionist barely looked up, taking the wallet with a polite but indifferent smile. "Dr. Zayne isnât in right now. Iâll make sure he gets this when heâs back."
"Oh," You nodded, murmuring a quick thanks before retreating back toward the exit. You thought nothing of this interaction as you left. You did what you thought was right and left the hospital back towards your apartment.
The days blurred together in a haze of work and routine. You buried yourself in assignments from the Hunterâs Association, throwing yourself into dangerous missions with a single-minded intensity. Anything to keep your mind occupied.
Sylus messaged you once during that time, his tone professional as he asked for updates regarding a lead he was tracking. Youâd responded quickly, sticking strictly to business. No pleasantries, no banterâjust the information he needed. He didnât press, didnât call you out for your uncharacteristic coldness. Maybe he didnât notice. Or maybe he did and chose not to say anything.
That night, you jogged through the dimly lit streets, your breath fogging in the cool air as you tried to exorcise the restless energy gnawing at you. The rhythmic slap of your sneakers against the pavement was grounding, steady. Jogging had always been your go-to, a way to clear your head and silence the endless stream of "what-ifs" and "if-onlys" that plagued your mind.
You shook your head, annoyed at yourself. There was no point in dwelling. Sylus wasnât the kind of person to give you what you wanted, and even if he did, could you trust it? Could you trust him?
But no amount of movement could completely shake Sylus from your thoughts.
His voice, his presenceâit clung to you, even now.
Why didnât he ask how Iâve been? Why didnât I?
The sound of skidding tires yanked you out of your spiraling thoughts.
âLook out!â
Before you could process the warning, a cyclist veered wildly toward you, their momentum too strong to stop. There wasnât even time to brace yourself. The impact hit like a freight train, and suddenly, you were on the ground, tangled with the bike and its rider. Pain blossomed sharp and hot in your knees as the asphalt scraped them raw.
For a moment, you just lay there, stunned. The world tilted unsteadily, the city lights smearing together like a watercolor painting.
âHey, you okay?â The cyclistâs voice snapped you back. They were scrambling off you, helmet slightly askew but otherwise unscathed. You shook your head to clear it, wincing as you sat up. You pushed yourself up, shaking the dizziness from your head, and checked on the cyclist who had crashed into you. They were already scrambling to their feet, looking slightly dazed but otherwise unharmed, their helmet and guards having done their job.
âIâm fine,â you managed, even as your knees throbbed in protest. âAre you?â
âYeah, thanks to the gear,â they said, pulling off their helmet to inspect a small crack along its surface. âGuess it did its job.â
Relief washed over you. âGood. Let me justââ
âWait.â A different voice cut in, firm but calm. You stood there, still trying to regain your bearings when a figure appeared beside you, moving with a grace that immediately caught your attention. Your heart skipped a beat when you saw who it was. Dr. Zayne. The same man who had crossed your path in the chocolatier's shop just days ago. His sharp eyes locked onto yours, and for a split second, everything else seemed to vanish. His expression shifted from mild surprise to something more concerned as he took in your state.
Without saying a word, he immediately began assessing you, his gaze narrowing at the blood now staining your knees. You winced, feeling the sting of the cuts that had begun to bloom with a fiery intensity, but you were determined not to show it. You were used to painâused to the sharp discomfort that came with being a hunter. You didnât need help. You could handle this on your own. Youâd always been able to.
But Dr. Zayne wasnât having any of it.
His voice, low and steady, broke through the haze of your thoughts. "Youâre bleeding. Those need first aid," he said firmly, his frown deepening as he glanced at your scraped knees. "Sit. Wait here. Iâll be back in a minute."
You opened your mouth to protest, to tell him you were fine, but the words caught in your throat. He wasnât asking. His tone, though gentle, was authoritativeâdemanding in its own quiet way. There was something about the way he carried himself, that calm, unflinching presence, that made it impossible to argue.
"Iâm fine, I am a hunter." you managed to say, your voice rougher than you intended. "I can handle it at home. Really." You tried to force a reassuring smile
âIs this a hunter thing?â he interrupted, one brow arching skeptically. âAre all of you this stubborn about basic care, or is it just you?â
The words should have been biting, but his tone was almost... patient. Like he was accustomed to dealing with difficult people.
You flushed, suddenly hyper-aware of the sting in your knees and the heat of his gaze. âIâm not being stubborn,â you muttered. âI just donât want to bother anyone over something so small.â
âSmall injuries have a way of turning into bigger problems,â he said, folding his arms. âAnd Iâm not bothered. As a doctor, Iâm asking you to wait here. Iâll be back in a minute.â
Without waiting for your protest, he turned and strode off, leaving you no room to argue.
You sat stiffly on the bench, gripping the edge as the minutes dragged on. The ache in your knees was nothing compared to the gnawing discomfort blooming in your chest. Anxiety clawed at you, whispering insidious doubts.
Heâs wasting his time on you.He probably thinks youâre pathetic and weak.Why couldnât you have just gotten up and left?
Your fingers curled into fists, the tension radiating through your body.
The sound of footsteps interrupted your spiraling thoughts, and Dr. Zayne was back, carrying a small first aid kit. He knelt in front of you without a word, his hands steady as he cleaned the cuts on your knees. The gentle pressure of his fingers as he worked felt almost surreal. His silence wasnât uncomfortableâit was just⊠calm. You found yourself drawn to it, to the quiet that seemed to settle around him.
"Youâre lucky," he said, glancing up at you as he bandaged your knees. "That couldâve been a lot worse."
You nodded, the words caught in your throat. There were so many things you wanted to say, things you wanted to ask him, but you didnât know where to start. So you remained silent, watching as he finished his work, his hands moving with the practiced precision of someone who had seen too many injuries to count.
When he was done, he straightened up and met your gaze. "You should be more careful," he said softly, his voice a little lighter than before, though there was still a note of concern underlying his words. "Next time, donât run so late at night. You never know what could happen."
You forced a tight smile, the words feeling like they were coming from someone else. "Iâll keep that in mind," you said, your voice quieter now.
Dr. Zayne took a step back after finishing the bandages, his sharp gaze softening ever so slightly as he packed the first aid kit. You glanced at him, your mouth opening to thank him, but before you could get the words out, he said, almost in unison, âThank you.â
Both of you froze, the simultaneous expressions of gratitude hanging awkwardly in the air. A surprised laugh slipped out of you, breaking the tension.
âYou first,â he said, a faint smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
You swallowed, trying to ignore the heat creeping up your neck. âI was just going to say thank you for⊠you know, helping with this.â You gestured vaguely toward your knees, the bandages clinging to your skin. âYou didnât have to.â
The moment stretched between you, awkward yet somehow comforting. Zayne gave a small, almost amused smile at the simultaneous gratitude, but his gaze softened when it landed on you, his concern still present.
"Thank you for returning my wallet," he said, his tone steady but with a hint of appreciation.
His words caught you off guard. âOh, right! That. It wasnât a big deal, really.â You fidgeted with the hem of your sleeve, avoiding his gaze. âI found it at the chocolatier shop. I figured it was better to bring it to the hospital than leave it lying around.â
He nodded thoughtfully, his eyes lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary. âI appreciate it. Not many people would go out of their way like that.â
You tried not to let his kindness throw you off, but it wasnât easy. There was something about Zayne that made you feel... small in a way you didnât like to feel. He was kind, yes, but that kindness made you wonder if you were deserving of it. Why should you be the one he cared about?
But before you could dwell on that any further, his voice cut through your swirling thoughts.
"Have you eaten today?" His tone was light, but there was an edge of sincerity beneath it, one that made your stomach twist in a way that had nothing to do with hunger. It reminded you of that conversation in the shop, of how he had so effortlessly read through your tiredness.
The sheepish look that crossed your face mustâve been obvious, because Zayne sighed, the sound so deep that it almost felt like a reprimand. He pinched the bridge of his nose in a gesture that was both familiar and surprisingly endearing.
âYouâve got to take care of yourself,â he said, his voice almost too gentle for the weight of his words. âItâs not healthy to go without food, especially if youâre going to keep running around like you hunters do.â
You opened your mouth to protest, to tell him it wasnât a big deal, but Zayne didnât give you the chance.
"Thereâs a diner close by. Itâs the least I can do to thank you for returning my wallet."
You shook your head instinctively, trying to backpedal. "Itâs really not necessary," you said, but Zayne wasnât having any of it. His eyes were firm, and there was an undeniable warmth behind them that almost made you feel guilty for refusing.
"Yes, it is," he replied, his tone steady but with a hint of finality. "Now, come on.â
You hesitated for a moment, the unease building in your chest like a brick wall, but the thought of Zayneâs calm, commanding presence made it impossible to say no. So, with a quiet sigh, you relented.
"Iâll pay," you muttered as he led the way, the words almost reflexive. You always felt like you had to pay your wayâlike it was your responsibility to do so, especially with someone who had helped you, even in the smallest of ways. You were used to standing on your own two feet.
Zayne only gave you a side glance, his lips quirking up in the barest of smiles. "No, you wonât. Itâs my thank you, remember?"
The diner wasnât far from where you had been, a cozy, low-lit place with a soft hum of quiet conversations and the clink of silverware against plates. The familiar scent of warm foodâsteak, mashed potatoes, and the unmistakable aroma of fresh breadâimmediately filled the air as you stepped inside. You followed Zayne to a small booth in the back, the vinyl seats creaking under your weight as you slid in.
You wanted to say somethingâthank you, maybeâbut the words felt stuck, trapped somewhere in the pit of your stomach, along with everything else that had been piling up for weeks. Zayne didnât seem to notice, his focus already turning to the menu as he gestured for you to pick something.
You wanted to ask him more, to understand him in the same way you understood the empty streets you ran through, but you couldnât shake the feeling that youâd just end up looking foolish. So, instead, you stared at the menu in front of you, unable to focus on the choices, as your mind churned with questions that had no answers.
Zayne ordered for both of you, his voice low as he made his choices, and when he looked at you, you caught a flicker of somethingâperhaps curiosity, or was it concern? It was hard to tell.
"You should eat more regularly," he said again, as though the words were a reminder he had to repeat for his own peace of mind. You nodded, letting the silence fill the space between you for a moment.
The food arrived, warm and satisfying, and you took a bite, surprised at how hungry you were despite the earlier denials. Zayne watched you for a moment, his gaze softening as you ate, but you couldnât bring yourself to meet it. His concern, his careâit felt too much. You werenât used to people worrying about you.
But as the meal went on, you found yourself starting to relax, the initial tension loosening from your shoulders. Zayne was easy to talk to, his calm, steady presence settling you in a way you hadnât expected. By the end of the meal, you felt... lighter.
"Call me Zayne," he said when the check came, his voice quiet but sincere.
You blinked, a little caught off guard by the request. "Zayne?" you echoed, testing the name on your tongue.
"Yes," he replied with a small, patient smile. "Itâs easier than 'Dr. Zayne,' donât you think?"
You blinked, taken aback. âAre you sure? I mean, youâve earned the titleââ
âAnd Iâll still have it in the hospital,â he interrupted, amusement flickering in his eyes. âBut here, itâs just Zayne.â
You nodded slowly, testing the name in your mind. It felt strange, almost too personal. But there was something grounding about it, too.
By the time dessert arrived, the knot of anxiety in your chest had loosened considerably. The warmth of the diner, the steady cadence of his voice, and the shared laughter over a poorly made joke had a way of pulling you out of your own head. For the first time in what felt like weeks, you werenât obsessing over your failures or doubts.
As you finished your meal, Zayne pulled out his phone and slid it across the table. âHere,â he said simply. âAdd your number. In case you ever need anything.â
You hesitated, the gesture feeling far more intimate than it probably was. But his expression was patient, expectant, and you found yourself entering your contact information before you could overthink it. When you handed the phone back, his lips twitched into a faint smile.
âThanks again for returning my wallet,â he said, his tone lighter now. âAnd for the company.â
You felt your cheeks flush, but this time, it wasnât entirely unpleasant. âItâs not a problem,â you murmured, a small smile tugging at your lips.
As you stepped out of the diner and into the cool night air, a strange sense of calm settled over you. Zayne walked you to the corner where your paths would diverge, his presence steady and reassuring.
âTake care of yourself,â he said, his voice softer now, almost intimate.
âYou too,â you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
The dinerâs warmth lingered even as you stepped into the cool night air. For the first time in what felt like weeks, your chest didnât feel as tight, the oppressive weight that had been bearing down on you now lifting slightly. You still felt the ache of Sylusâ absenceâa hollow, gnawing sensation that seemed to creep in whenever you let your guard down, but it wasnât as suffocating as it had been. Instead, a new sensation fluttered in its place, tentative and fragile: excitement. It was strange to feel this way, to look forward to the possibility of a friendship formed under such unlikely circumstances. Zayneâs calm demeanor, his steady presence, had surprised you.
As you walked, the sound of fluttering wings caught your attention. Instinctively, your heart skipped, your mind jumping to Mephisto. You tilted your head to the dark sky, half-expecting to see the telltale silhouette of his familiar. But it was just a cluster of pigeons, their wings catching the faint glow of the streetlights as they soared away.
Right. Of course. It was unlikely that Sylus was watching you tonight.
You exhaled, a breath you hadnât realized you were holding, and forced your thoughts away from him. Zayne had offered you a rare moment of normalcy, and you werenât about to let your memories of Sylus overshadow that.
The following weeks were a blur of activity, and before long, you found yourself stationed at an outpost on the outskirts of Linkon. A metaflux surge had disrupted the area, and the temporary makeshift hospital was bustling with injured workers, hunters, and even a few civilians caught in the chaos. The air was thick with tension, the metallic tang of metaflux faint but persistent, a reminder of the unseen dangers that lurked just beyond the safety of the encampment.
Zayne was assigned as the doctor for the outpost, and you often found yourself crossing paths with him. At first, your interactions were briefâa nod here, a shared glance thereâbut over time, you began to talk. It started with simple pleasantries, discussions about the metaflux readings or the influx of patients, but it wasnât long before the conversations deepened.
You learned that Zayne had a dry sense of humor, his sharp wit often catching you off guard. Heâd tease you about your stubbornness, and youâd retort with a quip about his overly serious nature. Despite his professionalism, there was a warmth to him, a quiet compassion that made him easy to trust. And though youâd never admit it, you found yourself looking forward to those moments of shared laughter, those fleeting glimpses of something lighter amidst the chaos.
But even as your friendship with Zayne grew, Sylus lingered at the edges of your thoughts, a shadow you couldnât quite shake. The conversations you had with him were sparse and strictly work-relatedâupdates from the Association, bits of intel you passed along to him. It felt transactional, a far cry from the intimacy you once shared. Yet, every time his name appeared on your screen, your heart still raced, betraying the fragile boundaries youâd tried to set.
One evening, a message from Sylus broke the monotony of your routine.
âCome over tomorrow night, Darling. I have an exquisite wine Iâd like you to tryâprocured it during a recent deal.â
The invitation was simple, almost casual. For a moment, you imagined itâthe rich scent of wine filling the air, his sharp yet alluring gaze fixed on you as he poured you a glass. But reality quickly crept in, dragging you back to the present. You couldnât go. You couldnât risk it. Not when your heart was still so fragile, still aching in ways you didnât want to admit.
You stared at the screen for what felt like an eternity, your fingers hovering over the keyboard as your mind raced. The truth was, you wanted to see him. But you knew better. You had to keep your distanceâfor your own sake, if nothing else.
âIâm tired..'
You typed, the words feeling hollow as they formed.
'Busy day tomorrow. Maybe another time.â
You hesitated before hitting send, the weight of the message pressing down on you. When his reply came, it was as simple as his invitation.
âOkay.â
The finality of it hit you like a brick, and for a moment, you felt like your breath had been stolen away. He didnât push. He didnât argue. That empty âokayâ hung in the air, leaving you with the quiet realization that, once again, you had lost yourself in the haze of someone elseâs world.
You tried not to read too much into it, but you couldnât shake the feeling that he had already moved on. That he didnât care enough to fight for your attention. Instead, it felt like you were just a passing thought, like an aftertaste that wasnât worth savoring.
Miss Hunter. The words echoed in your mind. You squeezed your eyes shut, willing the tears to stay behind your eyelids, but they pressed hard, a sting that never seemed to fully fade. You rubbed your forehead, trying to push away the thoughts. But even as you did, you couldnât escape the suffocating feeling in your chestâthe one that always came when you were reminded of how little you meant to him. You felt foolish, but you couldnât help it. It was like you were always waiting for the other shoe to drop, for him to come back, to pull you back into his orbit with that practiced charm, that voice that made you feel wanted, if only for a little while.
The dinner with Zayne had been a welcome reprieve. It had been two weeks since you last saw him, the demands of work pulling both of you in different directions. But tonight, seated across from him in a small, cozy bistro, you found solace in the familiar rhythm of your conversations. The mellow lights softened the sharp angles of his face as he recounted a mishap earlier in the week involving a particularly irritable patient.
His dry humor, paired with the subtle lift of his brow, drew a laugh from youâa genuine, light sound that felt foreign after the weight of recent days. For a while, the world outside blurred away. You werenât Miss Hunter; you werenât anything other than a person sharing a meal with a friend.
As the meal wound down, Zayne looked at you over the rim of his glass, his expression calm. âYouâre doing better than when we first met.â he remarked softly.
You blinked, momentarily caught off guard. âAm I?â
He nodded. His calm demeanor always had a way of grounding you, and tonight was no exception.
The meal wrapped up with the two of you trading small updates and light banter. You paid for your half of the meal, Zayne insisting it wasnât necessary, but youâd insisted back. There was a sense of normalcy here, something you werenât willing to let go of easily. When you parted ways outside the diner, the night air was cool and quiet. Zayneâs warm farewell echoed softly in your ears as you waved goodbye and headed back toward your apartment.
As you walked, you felt lighter somehow. The stress of the past few weeks hadnât vanished, but Zayneâs steady presence had reminded you of something importantâmoments of peace still existed, even in the chaos.
The faint scent of lavender greeted you as you unlocked your apartment door, a hint of the candle youâd left burning earlier. The lights were off, and the air felt too stillâunnaturally so. Your heart skipped, the hairs on the back of your neck standing on end. A lump formed in your throat, panic curling its fingers around your chest.
You flicked the light switch, and the sudden brightness flooded the room, revealing the figure sitting on your couch. Sylus.
You froze. Your body stiffened, caught between fight or flight.
Your yelp of surprise filled the space, your pulse racing as you clutched the doorframe for support. âWhatâSylus? What are you doing here?â
He was sitting on your couch, one arm draped casually along the backrest, his other hand resting on his knee. The dim light of the room softened the sharp edges of his face, but his expression was anything but gentle. His eyes, sharp and unyielding, tracked your every movement as if he were dissecting you with just a glance.
âHowâwhat are you doing here?â you stammered, your voice shaky as your pulse raced.
Sylus didnât respond right away. Instead, he tilted his head slightly, his gaze dragging over you slowly, deliberately. His silence was louder than any words he could have spoken, and it made your skin prickle.
âDarling,â he finally murmured, his voice low and smooth, laced with something you couldnât quite name. âYou look⊠exhausted.â
You blinked, still standing frozen by the door. His tone was soft, almost tender, but it was the way his jaw tightened, the way his fingers tapped against his knee, that betrayed his underlying tension.
âY-yeah,â you stammered, your voice wavering as you took a cautious step forward. âItâs been a long day. What are you doing here?â
Sylus leaned back, the leather of the couch creaking faintly under his weight. âA long day,â he echoed, his lips curving into a faint smile that didnât reach his eyes. âYet you had time for dinner.â
âIâŠâ you faltered, scrambling for a response. âIt was justâŠâ
âJust dinner,â he interrupted smoothly, his tone unreadable. âWith⊠someone else.â
The air felt thick, charged with a tension that made your skin prickle. You opened your mouth to respond, but the words stuck in your throat. His eyes narrowed slightly, his expression still calm but his body language telling a different story. The way his fingers drummed against his knee, the slight clench of his jaw, the flicker of something dark in his gaze.
Your heart pounded, your thoughts racing. Why was he here? What did he want? And why did his presenceâhis very existence in your spaceâmake your chest ache in that familiar, suffocating way?
âI didnât thinkâŠâ You stopped yourself, your voice trembling. âYou didnât say youâd be coming by. You canât justââ
âCanât just what?â he asked, his voice dangerously soft as he rose from the couch, his movements fluid and deliberate. âShow up to see whatâs wrong?â
Your breath hitched as he closed the distance between you, his height and presence suddenly overwhelming. âNothingâs wrongâŠâyou managed to say, your voice barely above a whisper.
âIs that so?â he murmured, tilting his head slightly, his eyes boring into yours. âBecause from where Iâm standing, it seems like youâve been avoiding me, Darling.â
The accusation hung in the air, sharp and unyielding.
âIâve been busyâŠâ you said weakly, your voice lacking conviction.
âBusy,â he repeated, his gaze flicking over you again, this time with something close to disdain. âToo busy for me, but not too busy for⊠him.â
Your hands fidgeted at your sides, your breath coming in shallow bursts. You wanted to move, to put distance between you, but your legs felt rooted to the spot. âI didnât think dinner with a friend would..â
âFriend?â he interrupted, the single word slicing through your sentence. His lips curved into something that might have been a smile, but it didnât reach his eyes.
Your heart pounded painfully against your ribs, the anxiety swirling in your chest mixing with something elseâsomething raw and painful that you didnât want to name. The memories of your last exchange with Sylus came flooding backâthe curt messages, the unspoken finality of his âokay.â You had tried to convince yourself that it didnât matter, that you didnât need his validation. But standing here now, under the weight of his gaze, you felt every crack in the fragile walls you had built to keep him out.
âI donât understand what you want from me,â you said finally, the words trembling as they left your lips.
His eyes softened slightly, but the tension in his posture didnât ease. For a moment, he looked like he wanted to say something, something important, but the moment passed as quickly as it came. Instead, he reached out, his fingers brushing against your cheek in a gesture so gentle it felt almost foreign.
âDonât make me feel like Iâm a stranger to you.â he said quietly, his voice carrying a hint of vulnerability that made your chest ache.
Donât make me feel like Iâm a stranger to you. The words echoed in your mind, repeating, twisting, until all you could hear was the raw edge of betrayal laced in his tone.
You let out a bitter laugh, the sound sharp and bitter, a little too loud in the quiet of your apartment. Your chest tightened, and for a moment, you felt the space around you grow smaller. You couldnât breatheâcouldnât think. All you could feel was the heat of anger building inside of you, raw and unrefined.
âThatâs rich,â you scoffed, finally managing to find your voice. âThatâs really rich, coming from you of all people.â
Sylus blinked, a subtle flash of surprise crossing his face, but it quickly masked over. His lips tightened, his brow furrowed ever so slightly, but it wasnât enough. You had to push, you couldnât hold back now. The words were tumbling out before you could even stop them. Your breath hitched, a strangled sob lodged somewhere in the back of your throat, but you refused to let it spill. You wouldnât let him see you breakânot like this, not in front of him. You knew the truth. He knew the truth. It hurt, yes, but you werenât the one to blame.
âYou've been treating me like a stranger for months,â you continued, your voice trembling with anger you hadn't fully realized was there. âBarely responding to my messages, not answering my calls, and when I do see you, itâs like you canât be bothered. You donât even see me.â You felt the weight of every unreturned message, every unanswered call, every promise left in limbo. âIâve had to hear from Luke and Kieran that youâre in Linkon. But you couldnât even make time to see me.â
You felt the ache deep in your chest, that familiar, suffocating knot forming. He didnât deserve your pain. Not anymore. You wouldnât let him have that. Not this time.
You took a shaky breath, suddenly feeling raw, exposed. âYou donât have to feel obligated to check on me, Sylus,â you said, your words clipped and cutting through the thick silence between you. âYou donât have to feel pity for me. I know where I stand. I know my place in your life.â
His expression, that unreadable mask, cracked for the briefest of moments. His lips parted, his gaze flicking to your face, then back down to the floor. His jaw clenched. But his eyes⊠They werenât the same as theyâd been earlier. The hardness was gone, replaced by something far more dangerous, something even more intimate. The storm was gathering, but it wasnât just in the airâno, it was inside him too.
âYou know where you stand?â His voice was quieter now, but there was an edge to it, a slight tightness you hadnât noticed before. He took a step forward, his body closing the space between you, like a wave of raw energy crashing toward you. His proximity only made your pulse race faster, but you couldnât back down. Not now.
âIâm just an informant, right?â you bit out, every word feeling like it sliced through the night air, cutting through the tension like a blade. âYou donât have to pretend you care, Sylus. So donât stand there with that look on your face like Iâm some important thing you need to check on.â
The air between you grew heavy, thick with unsaid words and stifled tension. Every inch of your body was telling you to get away, to shut down, to stop this before it tore you apart. But your feet felt heavy, stuck in place. Sylusâs presence was like gravity, pulling you toward him.
"You think that's all you are?" he murmured, his voice dangerously low, like the calm before the thunder. The way he said it made your heart stutter in your chest. It was both a question and an accusation or a challenge.
But there was something else in his voice. Something you couldnât quite place. His eyes were intense, too intense, and they searched yours like he was looking for the answer. The truth.
âI didnât want to hurt you,â he continued, his words clipped, as though they were difficult for him to say. âBut I couldnât....couldnât make sense of it. Of you.â
It was the first time that he seemed genuinely vulnerable, and it left you breathless and confused. You had always wondered if there was more beneath his cold exterior. You had always told yourself that he cared. But you had never dared to confront him.
His hand was close enough now to reach out, his fingers barely brushing the edge of your wrist. The air between you was still thick with everything unsaid, everything unhealed. And yet, despite the words that had been thrown between you, there was something undeniably magnetic in the tension. The ache in your chest, the rawness, the feelings of betrayalâthey didnât wash away just because you said them out loud.
God, you hated him for this.
But part of you yearned for him. That part that still felt tethered to him, despite the distance.
Sylusâs fingers hovered over your wrist, his touch like fire against your skin. For a moment, the storm between you calmed, leaving only the faintest echo of it behind. The weight of his gaze, the force of his presenceâit seemed to drown out the rest of the world.
He said nothing for a moment, his lips parting as though he wanted to speak but couldnât find the words. His eyes darkened further, not with anger now, but with something you couldnât quite define.
You took a breath, your body suddenly feeling too small beneath his gaze. The storm was still inside. You had to move away. Your heart pounded as if it were trying to escape your chest, desperate to flee from whatever was stirring inside you. You couldn'tâno, you wouldnâtâlet yourself get caught up in whatever this feeling was. You were not some fool, ready to throw everything away for the temporary pull of his presence. You knew better than that. You had to.
Every instinct screamed at you to retreat, to put some distance between you and the mess of emotions bubbling under your skin. His sharp gaze was enough to make your knees tremble, and it took everything in you not to look back, not to let him see the quiet devastation that flickered inside you.
âYou need to leave⊠Sylus.â You whispered. You staggered back a few steps, your breathing shallow, desperate. Your feet felt like lead, yet you forced yourself to walk away. You turned your back to him, willing your legs to move, hoping to escape before you got sucked into whatever dark vortex of feelings he was drawing you into.
He didnât move. Instead, you heard the familiar click of his boots against the floor as he took a single, deliberate step forward. âWhy?â His voice, low and curious, sent a shiver down your spine. It was almost too intimate, as if he were searching for a piece of you, trying to understand what you couldnât explain.
You didnât want to look at him. Didnât want to see the quiet confusion on his faceâthe faint flicker of disappointment that stung like salt in an open wound. You couldnât let him see your weakness, couldnât let him know how badly it hurt to be around him, how badly it hurt not to be around him.
âIs it so you can run back to your precious âfriendâ?â The words dripped with something unspoken, something that made your stomach twist.
You couldnât look at him. You couldnât. Not when his voiceâthat voice, the one that threaded through the air like silkâwas digging into your mind like this. The word echoed in your ears, almost mocking you, and you felt something fragile snap inside you. The weight of the years youâd spent keeping distance, of guarding your heart against him, against whatever he made you feel, started to unravel. But you couldnât let it.
You took another step away from him. One more step, you told yourself. Just one more. You didnât need this.
Dark tendrils wrapped around you as you move, pulling you back. He was using his evol to pull you back. You didnât need him pulling you in again. But then it came. That touch. He pulled you to him, forceful yet intimate, and your breath caught in your throat. You were too close. Too close to the edge of losing yourself, of falling into his presence.
His hands...no, his fingersâsnaked around your waist before you even knew what was happening. You gasped, body going stiff in surprise, but his grip tightened, pulling you back into him. You tried to keep moving, tried to pull away, but it was useless. His hold was ironclad, his presence consuming. His grip tightened slightly, but there was an almost comforting pressure there, a subtle reminder that despite the dispute between you, there was something undeniable between the two of you.
âWhy are you running?â His voice was a whisper against your ear, the words smooth like silk, but there was something jagged beneath themâsomething urgent, raw.
You struggled to hold yourself together, but the more you fought it, the more it pulledâthis unbearable need to lean into him, to give in to the chaos that his proximity stirred in you. You knew you shouldnât, but everything in you wanted to. You felt the ache of wanting something you couldn't have, the sting of the distance you had put between you and the thing that was somehow both poison and relief.
His hands tightened slightly, his thumb brushing over your ribs in a movement that sent a jolt through your entire system. The words you wanted to say, the reasons you needed to get away from him, all felt so small and pointless now. How could you possibly explain this? This tension, this pull? How could you say that being near him felt like the most excruciating thing in the world, but also the only thing that made you feel alive?
âYouâre not just an informant to me,â he breathed, his words slipping under your skin, curling into the tight spaces of your chest. âI didnât realize I was hurting you this much. That youâd want to distance yourself from me...â His tone softened at the end, but it only made everything worse. The tenderness in his voiceâhis tendernessâwas like a dagger in your side, making the blood in your veins freeze. You wanted to say something, anything, but all you could hear was the deafening rush of your own heartbeat. You tried to stay composed, but the words were caught in your throat, and your body was still pressed so tightly against his, your breath shallow, your pulse thudding painfully against your ribs.
Why was this so hard? Why couldnât you just say itâsay that you couldnât let him get close again? That you couldnât survive another wound, another aching, empty feeling in your chest because of him? But the way his hands tightened, the warmth of his body against yours, made everything you were feeling a little too real.
You could feel his heartbeat against your back, the rhythm in sync with your own, and the pull of him was growing stronger. You could feel your anxiety bubbling up, the gnawing fear at the pit of your stomach. Was this just him toying with you? Was he trying to pull you into his world of darkness and manipulation? Or did he really care?
Your head was spinning. The emotions warred within youâanger, confusion, guilt, and something else. Something that made your heart race faster and your thoughts scatter like leaves in the wind.
âLet me go,â you whispered, your voice barely audible over the storm that raged around you.
But you didnât pull away. You didnât push him off.
Sylus' grip on you tightened, his arm like a steel band around your waist, pulling you closer until there was no space left between you. His chest rises and falls against your back as his breath brushes against your ear, warm and heavy. Itâs as if heâs afraid, like if he lets go for even a second, heâll lose you forever. You can feel the tension radiating from him, but also something softer, something desperate.
âNo, Darling,â he murmurs, his voice low and thick with emotion, his tone possessive, as though the very idea of you slipping away shatters him. âYouâre not going anywhere and neither am I.â
"Youâre going to stay," He pulls you even closer, his lips brushing the shell of your ear as he speaks again, quieter this time, but laced with something raw and vulnerable. "...and youâre going to listen to me. I wonât let you walk away from this."
You can hear the flicker of something beneath his wordsâregret. And then, his lips ghost over the sensitive skin of your neck, lingering just a little longer than necessary. He slowly spins you around, to face him. His voice softens, almost apologetic. âI know I was a dick. I know I didnât respond to you, and Iâm sorry for that. I didnât know how to handle it⊠handle us. It confused me, and instead of facing it, I pushed you away.â His breath catches slightly, and you feel his chest tighten against your back.
His hand moves to cup your cheek, tilting your face slightly toward him, his thumb brushing over your skin as though itâs a promise, an apology. The weight of his gaze is intense, but thereâs also something tender there, something that wants to pull you back in, closer. âI know youâre still hurting, darling. I see it. And I... Iâll spend a lifetime making up for it, because thatâs what I want. A lifetime. With you. Not as some informant or some... thing, but as my beloved. You. By my side. Always.â
He pauses, letting his words hang in the air between you. His voice drops, the quiet sorrow of his confession sending a twinge of guilt through you. "I donât have the right to ask this of you, I know," Sylus continues, his voice thick with emotion. "But seeing you push me away⊠Itâs harder than I ever thought it would be. Harder than I want to admit." He presses his forehead lightly against your temple, his breath shaky. "Iâve never needed someone the way I need you, and I didnât know how to tell you that. But I do. I need you."
You can feel him tense slightly, the shift in his demeanor telling you that his thoughts have turned darker. His voice lowers, the jealousy evident in the way he speaks, though itâs wrapped in a softness that almost makes it harder to bear.
"And Dr. Zayne... I canât stand the thought of him being so close to you," Sylus adds, his voice low and thick with a possessiveness that unsettles you in its intensity. "It kills me, you know? Watching him with you, hearing you laugh like that with him, as if I donât even exist." His arm tightens again, almost painfully, as if he needs to remind you, remind both of you, where you truly belong. "I know I have no claim on you... but... I can't help but feel like thereâs a part of you that wants him in a way that... I can't compete with." His voice hardens, jealousy dripping from every word. "It eats at me, knowing he has a part of you that Iâm fighting for."
"Sylus..." Your voice cracked slightly as you repeated his name, your breath hitching, caught in the tension between you. His name felt heavy on your tongue, like it was both a question and an answer. You had never said it so quietly, so vulnerably. The memories of earlier came rushing backâhim with her, that delicate smile he gave her, the way she leaned into him just a little too comfortably. It had burned in your chest, the jealousy creeping in with a venomous ache.
The words tumbled out before you could stop them, too fast to gather, too painful to hide. "I felt the same... when I saw you with her," you confessed, swallowing thickly. "I felt so... so useless, Sylus. When I saw you with her, it felt like... like she was everything you needed. Better than me. And that... it broke me, Sylus. I felt like I wasnât enough, like I wasnât... worth it.â
The words stung, bitter and unrelenting, but the weight of them was finally lifted as you let them spill out. You felt exposed, naked in your insecurity, but somehow, it was all you could do to stand there and wait for him to respond. You could feel the weight of it, of how small youâd felt in that moment, how unworthy you had become in your own eyes. The self-doubt gnawed at your insides, each thought of her with him twisting like a knife in your gut.
Sylusâs expression softened, his features melting into a tender sadness, as though he were seeing you for the first time, truly seeing you. His hand reached out slowly, almost hesitantly, as if afraid to shatter the fragile space between you. His touch was a gentle comfort, his fingers brushing against your cheek, his voice a low whisper, "Darling, you're none of that... none of it, I swear."
You shook your head, feeling the tears threatening, but you couldnât let them fall, not yet. His words were kind, but the ache in your chest was still there, an unhealed wound.
He continued, his voice steady but thick with something deeper. "I didnât know you felt that way... about her, in the same way I feel about Zayne." His gaze met yours, and for the first time tonight, it wasnât uncertain. It was so gentle, so soft, tender. "But you need to know, you're it for me, DarlingâŠ" he murmured, his fingers curling around yours, grounding you in the quiet storm of your emotions. "Yes, I want help from her, but..." He paused, as if weighing his words carefully, "...I need you more." His words were a balm to the wounds that had festered within you, but the tenderness in his eyes was what finally reached you. His hand slid down to your shoulder, his thumb grazing the skin there. His warmth surrounded you, and you let yourself sink into the comfort of his words. The jealousy, the insecurity that had burned so fiercely in you when you saw him with her, melted in the face of the tenderness he was offering now.
You swallowed, trying to steady yourself as your heart raced, the intensity of the moment almost overwhelming. âZayne⊠Zayneâs just a friend,â you said, your voice fragile but firm, âsomeone who helped me... helped me see past the stuff in my head. After everything, I just... needed someone to remind me that Iâm not broken.â
Sylus's eyes softened even more, the depth of his gaze sending shivers down your spine. He nodded slowly, his expression filled with understanding. The tension between you didnât disappear entirely, but it was now laced with something more tender. More real.
âYouâre not broken, Darling.â he repeated, and there was a quiet strength in his voice, something that made you believe him more than you ever had before. âYouâre everything Iâve ever needed... and more.â
"I... Iâm sorry," you whispered, a lump in your throat as you looked up at him. "I never wanted to make you feel like I didnât care. I just... I was afraid youâd choose her over me."
Sylusâs fingers brushed against the nape of your neck, pulling you closer, his forehead pressing gently against yours. "You never have to apologize for that, Darling." he murmured, his voice warm, his breath mingling with yours. âIt was my fault and I accept that.â
The room was quiet, save for the soft sound of your breathing, as Sylus stood before you, his face drawn with intensity. The flickering light from the lamp cast soft shadows across his features, but his gaze... his gaze was sharp, focused entirely on you.
"I love you, Darling" he said, his words lingering in the air as though they were the first time he had allowed himself to say them out loud. "Iâm in love with you," he confessed, his voice steady despite the raw emotion that tinged it. "Iâve been in love with you for a while now, and Iâve tried to deny it. Tried to hide it from you and myself, but I canât anymore. I wonât. I love you, and I need you to know that."
The breath you hadnât realized you were holding caught in your throat. Everything in you froze, then splintered. The confession, so pure, so vulnerable, hit you with a force you hadnât been prepared for. You stood there, unable to move, a mix of surprise and relief flooding your chest.
He loves you. Sylus. The one you had longed for, yearned, and hoped for in silence. Your heart stuttered in your chest, the world around you growing impossibly still.
"IâŠ" you whispered, voice trembling, and you had to stop, had to steady yourself before the words could spill from your lips. "Iâve love you too," you said, your voice barely more than a breath, but it carried all the weight of everything you had kept inside. "Iâve loved you, and I never told you because I was afraid. Afraid that I was asking too much. Afraid of the rejection. Afraid that I wasnât enough."
Sylusâs expression softened, his lips curling into a frown as he stepped forward, closing the space between you. His hands reached for you, but not in the way you had feared or expected. They were gentle, his touch a plea for understanding. "Oh, darling," he whispered, shaking his head slowly. "Iâm so sorry. Iâm sorry you ever felt like you needed to hide it from me."
He reached up, brushing his thumb along your cheek, and you flinched slightly, your emotions suddenly overwhelming you, raw and untamed. "Weâre both idiots," he continued, his voice almost tender with the weight of the admission. "Weâve been skirting around each other, afraid of saying the one thing we both needed to say."
Your laugh came out soft, almost fragile, the tension in your chest breaking for the first time since Sylus had walked into your home. It was a quiet sound, but it was the first time youâd laughed all night, the first time youâd allowed yourself to feel something other than fear or uncertainty in the past few weeks with him involved. But that laugh didnât last long. As soon as it came, the tears followed, the ones you had been holding back for so long, finally slipping free. The dam you had built up crumbled, and before you could stop them, hot tears streamed down your face. before you could even reach up to brush them away, his hand was there, steady and warm against your cheek.
"Donât," you whispered, your voice thick with the ache you could no longer hide. "Please, donât look at me like this. Iâmâ"
"Stop," Sylus interrupted softly, his hand holding yours gently, his gaze unwavering. "Donât hide from me. I want to see all of you⊠everything youâve been hiding. I know you think I donât see it, but I do." His eyes locked onto yours with such intensity that you couldnât look away. "I see it when you think Iâm not watching. I see the way you pull back, the way you hide the parts of you that you think I canât handle. But I am looking. Iâve always been looking. And I donât want you to hide anymore. Not from me. And Iâm here and I want all of you."
His words were a medicine to the parts of you that had been bruised, the parts that had feared being exposed, vulnerable. But in his eyes, there was only love. No judgment. No pity. Just... love. And it was enough. It was more than enough.
The tears that had slipped down your face slowed, but they didnât stop. You didnât try to wipe them away this time, allowing yourself to be seen for the first time in ages. The sobs that followed were soft but trembled with relief, with something finally breaking open inside of you.
Sylusâs arms were around you in an instant, pulling you close, holding you in the kind of embrace that made you feel as though you could finally breathe, as though the weight of everything you had been carrying could finally be set down.
"Iâm sorry," you whispered, almost broken. "Iâve been so scared, Sylus. Scared of this, of being cast away... of losing you."
"Youâll never lose me, Darling." he murmured, his voice firm and unwavering as he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.
You tilted your head back slightly, your face still damp with the remnants of the tears that had fallen, and through your wet lashes, you searched his face. Sylus held you close, his arms wrapped around you in a way that made you feel safe, even as the doubts lingered in your heart. You wanted to believe him, but the fear, the uncertainty, was still there, buried deep beneath the surface.
He must have seen it in your eyes, the way you still hesitated, the uncertainty you couldn't quite shake. Sylus made a half-frustrated sound in the back of his throat, his hands tightening around you for a split second, before they slid up to cradle your face. His thumb brushed against your cheek again, a tender, pleading touch, before he leaned in, his lips finding yours in a sudden, urgent kiss.
The kiss was unlike any other. It wasnât slow, it wasnât soft. It was intense, filled with desperation, as though he needed you to understand just how deeply he felt for you, just how much you meant to him. His hands cupped your face, holding you as if you were the only thing that mattered in that moment, as if the world had stopped turning just for you. His lips pressed against yours with a kind of fire, but it wasnât angry, no. It was passionate, desperate in its own way, like he wanted you to feel how important you were to him, how much you had been wanted, loved.
Your hands trembled as they reached up, gripping the collar of his shirt, pulling him closer, wanting to bridge the distance between you, as though the kiss itself could erase every lingering doubt in your heart. Your breath hitched when you felt his pulse quicken under your touch, his heartbeat matching the frantic pace of your own. Each breath you took seemed to echo in the stillness of the room, mingling with the heat of his kiss, our lips moving together with a quiet urgency, the world beyond the two of you fading into a distant blur. You felt everythingâevery brush of his fingers, every subtle shift of his body against yours, the way his chest rose and fell beneath your palms, how his breath felt against your lips as if he couldnât get close enough to you.
Your chests rose and fell together, the world spinning around you. You could feel the heat of him, the urgency that still lingered in his touch, the way he kept you close, almost as if he were afraid to let go.
Breathing became an afterthought, both of you gasping for air when the kiss broke, but neither of you pulled far enough away to lose the connection. Sylusâs forehead rested against yours, his breath hot against your lips as he whispered, voice still heavy with emotion. âEvery day, from henceforth, I will work to make sure you never feel the need to doubt yourself. Not in my life. Not with me." His words, slow and deliberate, sank deep into your heart like a promise he would keep.
The intensity of the moment hung between you both, the room still, save for the soft sound of your breathing as you both slowly came back to reality. But in his eyes, you saw nothing but certaintyâcertainty that you were enough. That you always had been.
His hand found yours again, fingers weaving with yours, and he gave it a gentle squeeze, as if the simple touch was a quiet reassurance.
"You are everything to me," he murmured, his voice steady now, grounding you as much as his embrace. "And Iâll make sure you never forget that.â
Your eyes fluttered shut for a moment, absorbing his words, his warmth, his certainty. In his arms, you could feel the truth of his promise, somewhere deep inside, the doubts began to fade.
For the first time in a long time, you believed him. And when he kissed you again, this time softer, it was like the beginning of something new.
AN: reblogs, feedback and opinions are appreciated!