chapter 1
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@whorerific
chapter 1

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got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?
I think it’s normal for people to be mad at each other sometimes even if they’re close friends or family or intimate with each other. Like I think that’s a normal and healthy part of relationships that can happen sometimes
“Why were you on Mad At Me island” because at the time I was mad at you and yet our friendship has weathered that without trouble
i need a better tag for wwx and jc like i dont wanna use chengxian because they're too siblings but i don't wanna use jiang brothers because they're too in love i need a secret third thing
Look I love unconditional devotion love stories as much as the next person, but there's really something so deliciously raw about conditional devotion.
I have served you and I have loved you for decades, but I will not give up my principles for you. You cut out part of my heart and took it with you down that path that you insist on walking, but you walk it alone. Even when the bleeding, gaping hole you left in my chest kills me, I will not follow you.

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when the persona you made eats you; when the performance youve been putting on eats you; when the name they gave you eats you; when the image people made of you eats you; when the role you were assigned eats you; when the you that other people see or even made for you or you made for them takes over the you that you know and eats you alive.
Something nobody prepares you for is that the better you get at writing the harder it becomes. beginners write freely because they don't know enough to know what's wrong. then you learn. and suddenly you can see every single flaw in real time as you're making it and you have to write anyway while your own brain is in the corner going "that's a weak verb. that transition is lazy. you've used that word three times." getting good at this is mostly just getting better at ignoring yourself.
no animal was harmed during the making of this video. not one. for the few minutes that we were shooting film, the guns of each hunter fell silent. the industrial bolt throwers observed a moment's peace and the jaws of every predator hung softly open. no fish bit any hook and the bait worms held off on drowning only until the cameras stopped. the tails of ruminants ceased to flick just as their attendant flies, in unison, landed on their flanks to catch their tiny breaths. a spider instantly stopped winding silk around a wasp, patiently waiting for the caesura to end. a young veterinarian paused with the syringe in their hand. somewhere, a colicky baby stopped biting its mother's nipple and nursed happily for the very first time. we're sorry. we're sorry it couldn't have been longer. we didn't know this would happen.
i think after 35k notes of people tagging welcome to night vale, which i'm certain is good but which i've never listened to more than maybe 3 minutes of, i can say now that this was not written with a soothing radio voice in mind. the voice here, in my imagining, is grief-stricken, on the verge of tears.
if you're interested to know what this post IS biting, if it is not biting WTNV, it's basically just a conflation of the key descriptive passage in Jorge Luis Borges' short story El Aleph with my favorite passage from Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse V (the war movie that plays in reverse), plus a little piece of imagery borrowed from the staggeringly brilliant and tragically underappreciated poet Cornelius Eady, specifically the bit about the flies, which is lifted in part from my favorite image in his poem "Victims of the Latest Dance Craze." if you aren't familiar with any one of these, please consider this my recommendation of all three.
Works Cited:
"On the back part of the step, toward the right, I saw a small iridescent sphere of almost unbearable brilliance. At first I thought it was revolving; then I realised that this movement was an illusion created by the dizzying world it bounded. The Aleph’s diameter was probably little more than an inch, but all space was there, actual and undiminished. Each thing (a mirror’s face, let us say) was infinite things, since I distinctly saw it from every angle of the universe. I saw the teeming sea; I saw daybreak and nightfall; I saw the multitudes of America; I saw a silvery cobweb in the center of a black pyramid; I saw a splintered labyrinth (it was London); I saw, close up, unending eyes watching themselves in me as in a mirror; I saw all the mirrors on earth and none of them reflected me; I saw in a backyard of Soler Street the same tiles that thirty years before I’d seen in the entrance of a house in Fray Bentos; I saw bunches of grapes, snow, tobacco, lodes of metal, steam; I saw convex equatorial deserts and each one of their grains of sand; I saw a woman in Inverness whom I shall never forget; I saw her tangled hair, her tall figure, I saw the cancer in her breast; I saw a ring of baked mud in a sidewalk, where before there had been a tree; I saw a summer house in Adrogué and a copy of the first English translation of Pliny—Philemon Holland’s—and all at the same time saw each letter on each page (as a boy, I used to marvel that the letters in a closed book did not get scrambled and lost overnight); I saw a sunset in Querétaro that seemed to reflect the colour of a rose in Bengal; I saw my empty bedroom; I saw in a closet in Alkmaar a terrestrial globe between two mirrors that multiplied it endlessly; I saw horses with flowing manes on a shore of the Caspian Sea at dawn; I saw the delicate bone structure of a hand; I saw the survivors of a battle sending out picture postcards; I saw in a showcase in Mirzapur a pack of Spanish playing cards; I saw the slanting shadows of ferns on a greenhouse floor; I saw tigers, pistons, bison, tides, and armies; I saw all the ants on the planet; I saw a Persian astrolabe; I saw in the drawer of a writing table (and the handwriting made me tremble) unbelievable, obscene, detailed letters, which Beatriz had written to Carlos Argentino; I saw a monument I worshipped in the Chacarita cemetery; I saw the rotted dust and bones that had once deliciously been Beatriz Viterbo; I saw the circulation of my own dark blood; I saw the coupling of love and the modification of death; I saw the Aleph from every point and angle, and in the Aleph I saw the earth and in the earth the Aleph and in the Aleph the earth; I saw my own face and my own bowels; I saw your face; and I felt dizzy and wept, for my eyes had seen that secret and conjectured object whose name is common to all men but which no man has looked upon—the unimaginable universe.
I felt infinite wonder, infinite pity."
— excerpt from El Aleph by Jorge Luis Borges, transl. Norman Thomas Di Giovanni in collaboration with the author
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"It was a movie about American bombers in the Second World War and the gallant men who flew them. Seen backwards by Billy, the story went like this:
American planes, full of holes and wounded men and corpses took off backwards from an airfield in England. Over France, a few German fighter planes flew at them backwards, sucked bullets and shell fragments from some of the planes and crewmen. They did the same for wrecked American bombers on the ground, and those planes flew up backwards to join the formation.
The formation flew backwards over a German city that was in flames. The bombers opened their bomb bay doors, exerted a miraculous magnetism which shrunk the fires, gathered them into cylindrical steel containers, and lifted the containers into the bellies of the planes. The containers were stored neatly in racks. The Germans below had miraculous devices of their own, which were long steel tubes. They used them to suck more fragments from the crewmen and planes. But there were still a few wounded Americans, though, and some of the bombers were in bad repair. Over France, though, German fighters came up again, made everything and everybody as good as new.
When the bombers got back to their base, the steel cylinders were taken from the racks and shipped back to the United States of America, where factories were operating night and day, dismantling the cylinders, separating the dangerous contents into minerals. Touchingly, it was mainly women who did this work. The minerals were then shipped to specialists in remote areas. It was their business to put them into the ground, to hide them cleverly, so they would never hurt anybody again."
— excerpt from Slaughterhouse V by Kurt Vonnegut
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"From the air,
Insects drawn by the sweat
Alight, when possible,
On the blur
Of torsos.
It is the ride
Of their tiny lives.
The wind that burns their wings,
The heaving, oblivious flesh,
Mountains stuffed with panic,
An ocean
That can’t make up its mind.
They drop away
With the scorched taste
Of vertigo."
— excerpt from "Victims of the Latest Dance Craze" by Cornelius Eady
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"Lazarus, listen, we have things to tell you.
We killed the sheep you meant to take to market.
We couldn't keep the old dog either.
He minded you; the rest of us he barked at.
Rebecca, who cried two days, has given her hand to the sandalmaker's son.
Please understand – we didn't know that Jesus could do this.
We're glad you're back. But give us time to think.
Imagine our surprise to have you—not well, but weller.
I'm sorry but you do stink. Everyone please give us some air.
We want to say we're sorry for all of that.
And one thing more. We threw away the lyre.
But listen, we'll pay whatever the sheep was worth.
The dog, too. And put your room the way it was before."
— "Adjusting to the Light" by Miller Williams
holy fucken shit
You know what trope I wanna see more of? Couples who have been married forever who are estranged but still in love but estranged. You know me better than any other person on earth. I haven't seen you in three years. I never stopped loving you. If I have to spend another minute in your presence I will murder you. I'm hurt and I need you right here with me. God you're such a dumbass. You're the only one I trust to do this job. I want you out of my sight.
@expiredidealist ♡

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local woman doesnt choose anything.
local woman forgets that refusing to choose is still a choice.
local woman chose and then changed her mind but it was too late.
local woman chose but then forgot, due to spend the rest of her life trying to remember the one thing she actually intended for herself on purpose.
local woman still chasing the high of momentary certainty.
local woman doesnt choose anything.
local woman forgets that refusing to choose is still a choice.
local woman chose and then changed her mind but it was too late.
local woman chose but then forgot, due to spend the rest of her life trying to remember the one thing she actually intended for herself on purpose.
local woman doesnt choose anything.
local woman forgets that refusing to choose is still a choice.
local woman chose and then changed her mind but it was too late.
local woman doesnt choose anything.
local woman forgets that refusing to choose is still a choice.
local woman doesnt choose anything.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
You know what trope I wanna see more of? Couples who have been married forever who are estranged but still in love but estranged. You know me better than any other person on earth. I haven't seen you in three years. I never stopped loving you. If I have to spend another minute in your presence I will murder you. I'm hurt and I need you right here with me. God you're such a dumbass. You're the only one I trust to do this job. I want you out of my sight.