IDEK

sorry boss, i can't make it to work today or ever again for the rest of my life becaus i don't want to

being in yr 20s is like every day is a Try Not To Spend 40$ Challenge and i keep losing

cant believe we live in a reality where getting a silly iced drink can set you back 7 dollars. it's like they want me dead

when the 1975 said and i get somewhere but don't like it, get somewhere change my mind, get somewhere but don't find it, i don't find what i'm looking for

A smart person will simply look something up if they’re unsure, but a stupid person is rarely unsure

bitches are gonna blame the second wave on protests alone... don't let them

getting approached by an animal that wants you to pet them is such a magical feeling. like they saw you and went "yeah there's love in there"

The son of a minotaur and a mermaid has a one in four chance of being born with a normal body

Average things become more superior when you add the word French to it (e.g. French fries, French toast, French kissing).

Modern medical care has stopped natural selection, preventing the human species from evolving towards a superior race.

You’re pretty lucky if you see a blimp considering there is only 25 in the world.