your local heartthrob

When you hear "In 1899, the streets of New York City ECHOED with the voices of newsies" so you know your about to watch two hours and one minute of peak cinema

Oh! The intimacy of adopting each other’s vocabulary.

who up wasting their only shot at life through complete and utter inaction

Wile E. Coyote, two milliseconds before he lights a match only to reveal he's surrounded by flammable traps he himself has set and the whole website explodes

after much deliberation I have completed a simple task that took me less than 10 minutes, and I'm happy to report that this time it only cost me about 3 days of dread

*sends out email I've been putting off* ah finally :). ah that's a weight off my shoulders :). ah I can relax an-- *receives response to email* what the fuck. what the fuck. what the fuckkkk

I love tumblr more than IG bc IG feels like I’m posting looking for a job but on here it’s like I already lost the job and my wife and the house and I’m just sitting on the curb talking to myself

"There's millions of Tumblr users" to you. To me There's only about 12 and we all reblog the same five posts from each other

let’s all quit our jobs and just go on walks

"Oh, I asked chatGPT!!" "Oh I asked gronk!!" Well, I asked Lord hades, and he said to judge situations with fairness and reason.

Context for anyone who is wondering: Lamine Yamal's parents won an UNICEF raffle for a charity photoshoot in which Barça players posed with kids, and 5 month old Lamine happened to get 20yo Messi. Which is like. Literally insane