Critically Spectacular

What Is It?

An animated movie based on the popular LEGO building system set. There’s also a cartoon series, but that’s only slightly related. This movie is not based on that series.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

Yeah, it’s fun. Pretty crazy most of the time, too. It starts big and keeps up the pace the whole time!

It’s not perfect, though. It’s the kind of action that’s kinda like jangling keys, y’know? If it was just the visuals, this movie would kinda suck. Which is good that it’s got some pretty good comedy, too. It never gets too serious.

The whole point here is to just go and have fun. Don’t even worry about it! It’s better for kids of course. But there’s enough comedy to keep the adults happy for the ride.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

The story is clearly secondary here. Paper thin and relying on sight gags to keep the pace moving, there will be precious little here to quench a critical pallet. Every setting is generic, clearly meant more as a means to a joke than to build anything lasting.

The two characters that have any sort of growth are the villain Garmadon and his estranged son Lloyd. This is the true purpose of the film, showing a young audience the concept of forgiveness and acceptance. This is effective enough on it’s own. However, Garmadon never truly becomes likable. He remains the rather awful villain at the end, but now he’s in good standing with his child. Unfortunately this comes off more as a cliché than anything meaningful.

While not a complete failure, it’s also not particularly complex. The film is intended for younger children, and is bright, colorful, and loud. Older viewers seeking something to consider will come away with very little.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

This movie tries the same pacing method as the original LEGO Movie, with mixed results. More live action gives the film a weird feeling in a few places, but the quick paced comedy is effective enough on it’s own.

The adults that go to see this with their kids might be a little bored because of how cliché the movie is, but it’s inoffensive fun otherwise.

What Is It?

The sequel to the successful action spy movie, Eggsy is now a fully fledged member of the secret society The Kingsman when an unknown enemy destroys the entire foundation. Now, with nowhere left to turn, an old ally is called on for help.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie is nuts! It’s crazy action stunts right out of the gate!

First action is a crazy car chase with a dude with a robot arm. It’s a good mix of practical stunt work, CG, and camera tricks. Some of it works great, but sometimes you can see it’s sped up a little. But it’s all fun, so whatever. All the action in the movie is like that. Think of the action stuff in the first movie and just make it all bigger.

Also like the first one, you’ve got some good comedy to compliment the action. One liners, quips, silly stuff that’s just fun. It’s all here. And yeah, some pretty bad stuff happens, too. But it’s all balanced out to make sure everything stays fun. That’s the name of the game here.

The CG’s a little off, though. It kinda looks like animated plastic or something. So it’s easy to pick out what’s fake and what’s real. It’s fine, though. That’s not the point here. The movie’s not trying to make you believe that this lady in South America has actual robotic attack dogs. I just wish it looked a little better, though. Kinda nitpicky.

Movie’s great, though. If you loved the first one, you’re gonna love this one!

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

Much like the first film, we eschew a developed plot for the sake of quick action and cheap laughs. This is done intentionally, as this is still an homage to the Roger Moore era of James Bond films, taking their goofy nature and pressing that to it’s utmost, such as it is. It is effective in this regard if nothing else.

Plot points that were neatly tied up in the first movie are neatly undone here so that they might be added to and finished again. These mostly come across as contrived and pandering. It is effective enough in it’s own way, but hardly fresh.

The greatest misfortune comes from unnecessary political commentary. On one hand, having our villain removed suddenly to “surprise” the audience with a different villain motivated by monetary gain comes across as nonsensical. His motivations, while understandable, are not consistent with his actions. Additionally, the commentary upon the current United States president were wholly useless to what was already a nonsensical plot. These points are purely political in nature and do nothing but harm a film already in dire straights in terms of Critical viewership.

I must recommend a pass on this film. The only challenging thing here is retaining your suspension of disbelief.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

Current politics in modern non-political media are a surefire way to horrendously date your work. A decade down the road, people will see this and will either have no idea what is going on, or will recognize a petty squabble from years past. No matter what your ideological leanings are, this is a terrible situation to be in.

As for the movie itself, it’s more or less on par with the first one. Good action, fun characters, good dialog, brain dead plot. It’s a spectacle movie and the film makers know it. They own it. And that’s why it’s still effective. Hopefully for the third one they’ll leave the political landscape out of their movie.

What Is It?

A dramatic film adaptation of a real life church in Tennessee, which helped a community of Burmese refugees find purpose while simultaneously saving a community church.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

Not really a spectacle movie, but I can dig it. It’s all about community and family, right? That’s cool.

The movie’s not really exciting. Even the one kinda exciting scene wasn’t really all that. But, I mean, it’s kinda based on real stuff so that makes sense.

Pacing is fine, though. I never really felt bored. And it’s not preachy like I expected it to be. It’s a Christian faith movie, so that’s in there, but they’re not condemning the audience or talking down to us.

It’s nothing I’d go out of my way to see, but it was fine. Just fine.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

Adapting real life events can be a very difficult undertaking. What do you include? What to you neglect?

Here, the film makers used a variety of clever choices to make the film more authentic. Chief among them the actual church and grounds were used for the set. The extras were cast from the congregation. These decisions helped make everything feel more real, selling the audience on the story.

The story itself is simple enough. A feel good underdog story of a church in need, a preacher with a grand plan, and desperate people. And that is what the movie is. Simple. Direct. There are no unnecessary drama side plots. No evil villain. Just honest people trying to save that which is important to them. It’s effective.

One point that must be made about faith movies is their tendency to overuse Deus Ex Machina. God solves all the character’s problems so the final act may be joyous and good. And also spoil the movie. Not so, here. Faith is still the focus, but the people are allowed to fail. They are given tools, but no direct solutions. People must take what is given to them and make something of it. This is highly uplifting, and deeply satisfying to watch. And it is the primary reason that I give this film high marks.

It is not a perfect film. But it is what it needed to be. And that is enough.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

The brief history of this church and it’s congregation are shown during the credits, and it’s pretty amazing. These people have worked very hard for what they have and should be applauded for it.

And while it’s no spectacle, it is a very nice watch. If you want a good time at the theater, just a moment to feel better about the world and your fellow mankind, then this really is the movie for you.

What Is It?

The movie adaptation of the novel of the same name, written by Jeannette Walls, of her childhood and upbringing at the hands of her poverty stricken and dysfunctional parents.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

It’s not that kinda movie, okay?

It’s interesting and all, but it’s really just someone’s life story. Real life isn’t really a spectacle. It’s just life, y’know?

And that’s what this movie is. It’s pretty real. And it’s sad watching all those kids deal with that. Just don’t come into this expecting action or anything.

It’s pretty slow, really. And the dad’s such a jerk I just wanted to skip out in the first half hour. And, that’s about it.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

But this is precisely the type of movie the critical mind can enjoy!

The beautiful cinematography captures not only the modern day of New York City, but also a wide variety of locations and time periods. We see Jeannette grow from a small girl surviving a kitchen fire to a very well off gossip columnist, from New York to Virginia to New Mexico.

The child actors play well off of their adult counterparts. This was likely due to the real life children still being alive to give advice and direction. The story is deeply personal and all too familiar for anyone that has had to deal with poverty.

One seeming blemish is the father. Who is cruel and harsh for the majority of the film. This is a deliberate tactic, and there is an excellent payoff at the end of the story. I urge you to stay and see this through to the end.

This may be a long and somewhat dull film, but that is also life. And this movie brilliantly emulates that.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

I don’t think it’s very easy or even right to judge a film that is someone’s life. So, I’ll focus on the acting, which was top notch, and the emotive focus the movie took, which was highly effective.

This is a good movie. It’s not an easy to watch movie. There are a lot of ugly things here. But, that’s also life. You have to take the bad with the good. And it’s not so much what you get. But what you do with what you get. This is a movie for the patient more than anything else. Give it a chance, and it’ll surprise you.

What Is It?

The film adaptation of Steven King’s popular horror novel. After his brother goes missing, a boy gathers his group of friends and tries to unravel the secrets of their home town and it’s murderous past.

Also. There is a clown.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie is a scary good time! Sure it uses a buncha jump scares, but it’s got something else that’s really important for horror movies: tension!

The whole movie’s winding up the viewer, making you wonder what’s gonna happen next and who’s gonna get it. And that creepy clown is always there, too. So you keep waiting and dreading him showing up again. That works great!

The special effects are pretty good, too. Not great, but good for what it is. You get one good practical effect where a guy’s nose is just gone, then you’ve got pretty fake CG teeth. When it’s good, it’s real good. When it’s bad, it’s pretty obvious.

And that final bit! That whole ending scene is just cool! It’s over the top, and lets you let off all that steam the movie made you build up. Plus it’s really satisfying.

This one gets an A-OK from me!

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

My first concern is the acting. We have a cast of children, which any veteran film aficionado will tell you can only spell trouble. And while the actors do occasionally have lines that are far too mature for their tender ages, the acting is more than passable. It is easy enough to believe that these children are dealing with this bleak situation. They behave in a believable way, even if it is not a completely realistic way.

The town is far more fascinating. Here is a place with an exceptionally large number of murders among adults, and far greater rates among those younger. Yet, the town seems happy. Peaceful. Seeing the glimpses of the televised programming yields the answer. And that is only one of many more subtle points within the film. Or, at least what passes for subtle here.

This brings me to the final consideration. The horror itself. And while “scary” is very subjective, there is a difference between a scare and horror. Horror is lasting, and will follow you long after you have finished watching. Sadly, this film substitutes subtle terror elements for loud, bombastic moments and an oppressive atmosphere. You will leave the theater drained and tired from adrenaline, but not truly frightened.

Still, I would be remiss not to give this film a good rating. Despite it’s flaws, it is more than serviceable.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

It’s difficult for movies to find the right balance of showing the danger without showing too much. And sadly this movie breaks that point in it’s opening act. Before the blood washes from the street, you’ll have seen too much and nothing else will be able to live up to that. Though, not for a lack of trying.

That complaint aside, the movie is highly entertaining, with great acting and a tight story. It pushes the boundaries more than a little, but gets away with it due to subject matter. And at the end of the day, even I’m looking forward to the inevitable Chapter Two.

I’ll give this one a thumbs up. This is a good way to spend a couple hours.

What Is It?

The first feature length animated adventure after Don Bluth left Disney. A mother mouse goes on an epic quest to save her sick son, encountering the intelligent Rats of NIMH.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie has tons of action. The quick pace keeps things from getting dull, moving from one thing to the next constantly. It never goes to the babyish levels of jangling keys, either. Everything here has a reason to exist.

You’ve got suspense, too! It’s got great tension buildup with great payoff every time. Even knowing what’s gonna happen, it still works. Even 35 years later.

And who doesn’t love sword and sorcery stuff? Wizards and knights, secretly living right under modern day humans. It just gets the imagination going like none other!

This movie’s awesome. Watch it with your kids. Or just on your own. It’s worth it!

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

This film showed the world what Don Bluth could do with a good enough story. One that was loved, dearly. To touch so deeply on what a mother’s love truly meant, what lengths she would go to for the sake of her children. To show humility and respect of others through the rats. There are deep layers here that a child will grow to know and love as they grow.

The background holds details and secrets for the keen observer. Particular in Nicodemus’ book. The film knows that there must be many things going on at any given time, that the focus of the story does not mean nothing else is happening. A story told simply but still retaining such depth is rare indeed.

This film is a rare and wondrous thing. It may be intense for very young children, but it will capture the imaginations of young and old alike. This is a timeless, treasured classic, and should be considered as one of the greats in film history.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

What’s left to say about this movie that hasn’t been said by others? The animation is beautiful. The story is magnificent, even if it seriously deviates from it’s source material (go read the book if you haven’t, it’s also very good). The music is wonderful. The voice acting is excellent, if a little stiff at times. But most of all, it’s fuel for the imagination and panacea for the soul.

If you haven’t seen this movie, you owe it to your inner child. This movie is one of the greats and it would be tragic indeed to have never seen it.

What Is It?

A murder mystery surrounding a father traveling from England to find out how his daughter died.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie is really weird, man! The whole thing’s shot out of order, but not really? It bounces back and forth, showing stuff from different angles, or showing stuff that’s just a daydream. But, y’know? It kinda works here! Keeps everything snappy.

The special effects are minimal at best. No exploding cars when they get shot, no crazy fireballs. The whole thing’s kept real gritty. It’s pretty obvious they wanted to make this movie feel “real”. Even the sound effects are low key.

There’s one running joke that no one can understand what this guy’s saying. He’s got this Cockney accent, right? And he’s running around LA. So everyone complains that they can’t understand him and his reactions are just priceless.

It’s weird. This movie isn’t really an action movie, but it’s got the right pacing and the weird editing keeps it interesting. Plus, the action scenes are all cool because they’re so normal.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

The editing is truly the highlight of this film. Telling a story out of order is a difficult task. But showing the same sequences over and over and making them interesting every time is no small feat. Minor variations, different perspectives, all of these techniques blend together to make a single successful whole of the movie.

The story is also well thought out and put together. The world is very much alive and moving around the characters, with or without their input. And when things in the rest of the world catch up, it will catch you off guard.

Seeing this director’s earlier work is very impressive. His technique has clearly improved from this point, and it’s obvious why he was chosen to work on the remakes he was given later. It’s also no small wonder the editor moved on to much bigger projects. This film is almost a who’s who of upcoming talent. This hidden gem is very much worth investigating.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

I had seen this movie when it was new and I was much younger. And it stuck with me for over 15 years. Seeing it again, now on DVD instead of VHS, showed me why it stuck with me so well. It’s a fantastic movie and well worth your time to track down.

Keep in mind that the unusual editing and storytelling might turn away the most dedicated Spectacle movie goers. Or, it might become a spectacle all unto itself.

What Is It?

A caper movie in the vein of Ocean’s 11. After being fired from his job, Logan Lucky hatches a plan to steal money from a NASCAR race track.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

I saw the preview for this movie, and I thought it was going to be a comedy. Joke a minute, right? Situation stuff. Looked fun. But, it’s not. It’s not funny at all. It’s really serious all the time. Which, I mean, I guess it works? But it’s not as much fun as it should be.

The pacing is kinda weird, too. It takes forever for anything to happen, but it’s not really slow. Stuff is happening, but none of it really feels very important. Like, it was cool watching the two guys break out of prison. But then we had to sit there and watch Logan get a tetanus shot for no reason. I kinda wish we’d gotten to see the brothers do more stuff together, because when they’re doing stuff it was pretty cool.

I feel like I didn’t really get a whole lot out of this movie. It’s not really exciting. And the characters aren’t very interesting. And we don’t really get to see anything really cool. It’s just, like. A bunch of stuff happens, the end. I dunno if I can really tell people to go see this one. It wasn’t for me.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

This film lives on minutia, as is the case with Mr. Soderbergh’s other works. Build a story that is very complex, then tell only the most valuable pieces first. Reveal the interesting portions later to surprise the audience. A winning formula, truly.

Here, however, the pieces revealed in the final act simply raise more questions. You might begin to wonder when he had the time to plan these things. Or even do the things he did to set up gainful situations. Instead we focus on character interactions, which are enjoyable on their own, but add very little to the plot.

Ultimately, the story is clean and simple, but uninteresting. The movie accomplishes what it intended to do with so few frills that it rendered itself without purpose. And it is for this reason that while I feel the film is serviceable, I cannot in good conscience recommend it.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

This movie feels too formulaic. As if the director and writer needed to make a movie, maybe had a half baked idea, but didn’t really have the means or energy to make the movie work. So, the plot meanders along looking very busy but not really accomplishing very much.

Worse, I feel that the film might be banking too hard on it’s themes. NASCAR being a focal point, the biggest song in the movie being Country Roads, the setting, the trailers and back woods houses every character lives in, all of it feels like it’s pandering to a specific audience. The real shame is, I think that audience will still see this movie and convince themselves it’s good because of their love for their country. I love my country too, but I need more than cheap tricks to enjoy a movie.

What Is It?

A surreal animated suspense thriller, directed by the late great Satoshi Kon. A brilliant scientist creates a device that allows people to share their dreams. But a dark force is at work somewhere within. Only Paprika can find the culprit and stop them.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie is just crazy! It’s got all this stuff going on all the time, and it’s hard to tell what’s a dream and what’s real. Which I guess is kinda the point?

I feel like it’s spending so much time being weird and mysterious that it forgets how to be exciting. Like, there’s a ton of stuff going on all the time but because of the way it’s made, it’s impossible to really follow it.

The whole movie’s like that. It’s pretty obvious it’s the point, but it’s kinda hard to get behind it when the visuals are about the only spectacle here. And they’re really good, don’t get me wrong! But that’s all there is for someone like me to try and enjoy, and it just ain’t enough.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

The film has dense layers of artistic expression and surrealist interpretation, all built upon the foundation of how dreams work and what they truly mean. The subtlety of the film can be nearly overshadowed by the grand visual spectacle, but in the end it all shines through.

Having it be mysterious as to what is and is not a dream leaves the viewer wondering exactly what reality is. This surrealist approach to examining reality and the self is standard fare for Satoshi Kon. It makes for wonderfully imaginative stories that work well within their animated backgrounds. The visuals can be manipulated to be whatever is needed for the idea to be shown, not told. It’s an excellent use of the medium.

The plot’s narrative is dense, this is true. It’s also rich with meaning and imagery for those willing to plumb it’s depths. Dealing with deeply rooted psychological trauma and how that relates to a person’s actions and choices in life are on full display here.

It’s honestly a wonderful movie, and if you have the chance and are of a critical mind, it will be well worth your time.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

Some movies use the abstract and surreal to make things seem smarter than they actually are. This is not one of those movies.

There is a subtle genius at work in this movie, and as you peel back what’s shown on screen you find layers of additional ideas. References to other works that Satoshi Kon worked on are littered throughout, and for a fan this is a wonderful little Easter Egg (like the poster for Tokyo Godfathers near the end).

The one issue here is that this is a thinking movie only. The visuals are amazing and incredibly well drawn, but the pacing is all wrong for a spectacle movie. There’s no payoff. Unless you want to sit down and dissect what you’re watching, there’s just going to be an hour and a half long confusing mess. This, sadly, is also a hallmark of Satoshi Kon. His work will be limited to film students and critics.

Critical minds will find a bounty unlike anything they can dream here, but the more spectacle oriented will just be confused and bored.

What Is It?

A suspense drama based on several events dealing with the Wind River reservation. A Fish and Games hunter discovers the body of a young woman miles from civilization. She has no shoes and there’s clearly more going on here.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

It’s a pretty good movie, but it’s too slow to really catch my interest. Which, I mean, that’s fine and all. That’s how it’s supposed to be.

There’s a couple parts where it’s all action, but even then it’s over and done with right away. It’s just not enough to really dig into if you’re looking for a ride.

Plus, since it’s all drama all the time, you gotta listen to people talk. A lot. That’s most of the movie.

It’s an interesting movie. Just, if you’re looking for a wild ride, this movie ain’t it.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

This film features some of the most solid performances I’ve seen in some time. Heavy drama as the tribal police and FBI search for whomever could have brought harm to our victim. A Fish and Games hunter trying to reconcile with his family and friends. It’s an emotional roller coaster and satisfies continuously.

The pacing is faster than you might expect from a film such as this. But, this helps to keep the story moving, as there are a great number of places to see and examine. But, the film effortlessly moves to a slower pace to keep tension higher, or to spotlight a particularly important bit of dialogue.

Add to this the excellent cinematography and you have a very bleak but highly satisfying mental exploration. And with an absolute powerhouse of an ending, I must give this film my full recommendation.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

It’s clear this movie is a critical think-piece first. There’s no room here for spectacle. Great acting, a powerful story, and particularly well handled traumatic moments set this movie near the top of the Critical category. If you’re looking for something that will give you some food for thought, this is your movie.

But, if you’re looking for something to just pass a bit of time, better see what else is playing. This is not a movie to go into lightly.

What Is It?

An English localization of the animated French film, Ballerina. A kids film about an orphan that wants to become a dancer, and through a series of events ends up in a prestigious dance school in Paris.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie is intensely boring. Like, it’s here to test your patience and see how long it takes to break you.

The whole first part of the movie is just dumb kid stuff. There’s even a motorcycle chase. And with everyone throwing out dumb one liners you can’t really get into it.

But when the movie knocks it off with the forced and unfunny comedy, you get a whole lot of slow talking scenes, girls practicing ballet, and pointless love triangles.

By the end of the movie there’s a dance fight, but there isn’t anything that could save this snore fest.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

I must concur with the terrible state of the first act. The dub is clearly not done well, failing to match with the lips often and more often having lines added when no one is facing the camera. There is a clear effort here to add more when more was entirely unnecessary.

Nearly halfway through the run time, things do get better. We’re able to take our time with our lead and her new mentor, a failed dancer. Cleverly named Odette. The dynamic between these two is stilted but effective enough. Really, all of the relationships in this movie could be defined that way.

The final act does convey a very good lesson. Felicie has miraculously made it to final tryouts for her class, and fails. She rose on her own merits and fell at the last moment. And after a time of despondency, she did pick herself back up, redoubled her efforts, and became a better dancer for her trouble. I may not be able to say much that is positive, but this I will defend.

The ending is passable, but not good enough for forgive the atrocious start. Children may enjoy this, but few else will.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

I feel that this movie suffers from many of the same problems Japanese animation suffered from in the ‘70s and ‘80s. Terrible localization. The team clearly wanted to add more excitement and comedy to the production, so they inserted current American pop music, forced jokes every chance they could get, and broadly ignored what made the movie worthy of being localized in the first place. The localization team did more harm than good here.

That being said, I can’t say there was much truly good here either. It’s a very slow and very silly movie. While not entirely awful, the first thirty minutes will chase most people off, and the remaining hour likely won’t make up for the start. Consider this as a rental for your children at best.

What Is It?

A comedy action movie where a down on his luck bodyguard is hired to protect a hitman for hire in order to take down a butcher dictator.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

What an absolute rush! This movie’s got it all! Great action, awesome characters, a fantastic soundtrack, and it’s funny! It’s actually funny!

The stuntwork needs to be pointed out first and fore most. Because from what I could see, it was basically all practical effects. People in cars and bikes doing stuntwork. No CG effects here, you’re getting the real deal. And even when Ryan Reynolds is clearly replaced by his stunt double because of the super obvious motorcycle helmet, you just don’t care because the action is so good!

The whole thing is basically a road trip movie, right? So, naturally, every kind of disaster you can think of happens to these guys. Their car explodes, they’re chased through three countries by big dudes with guns, and the whole time they’re arguing with each other and yelling. I was just howling with laughter. The jokes are merciless. It’s funny from start to finish.

I’ve got no complaints about this movie. It’s a great time at the movies.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

I, however, had a less than favorable time.

While I must compliment the early scenes of the film and their use of visual story telling, there was also nothing in the film that could not have been predicted. As you see things begin to take shape in the first act, your guesses as to how the third act will play out are almost certainly going to be correct. There are no surprises here.

That is something that can be important to a comedy. After all, drawing out a joke with a known punchline only serves to make the laughs greater. Here, however, the predictability rarely plays into the comedy itself. More often, you are left with the ridiculous or the immediate situation, or even abrupt comedy. It is successful at getting laughs, but poorly utilizes its script for even more opportunities.

And, sadly, the overall story is lacking any form of depth. It feels more that the screen writers were attempting to force an agenda with their script than write to the comedy itself. Thus, the hitman is actually a very good person but the protection agent is rather terrible. Chaos is good, while mundane is bad. All reinforced by the film. Stare too deeply into this, and it will leave you with a hollow, unpleasant feeling, defeating the comedic value in the long term.

While by no means a bad film, I must urge a pass on this one.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

The standard popcorn flick of the ages. What it does well, it does exceptionally well. What it does poorly, it doesn’t even try to hide. This is exactly the kind of movie people will urge you to see, telling you to just “shut your brain off”. They’re not wrong. There’s good times to be had here.

It is disappointing to see such an awful, negative character played by Samuel L. Jackson pushed as the better person. The second line he gives is to disparage white people. Things like that will leave a bit of an ugly taste for some. Look past it, and there’s a decent comedy to be seen here.

Honestly, if you’ve seen the trailer, you’ve already seen what you’re going to get out of it. There are no surprises here. I’d say “boring is good”, but this movie is anything but boring.

What Is It?

The movie based on the true events that inspired Herman Melville to write Moby Dick.

This dramatic adventure is a story within a story, where Melville found the last survivor of the Essex and convinced him to tell the story so he might write his next book.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie’s pretty good. Or, at least, most of it is. It just kinda feels like I didn’t really get a lot out of it, y’know?

The sailing is pretty sweet. Those old ships are pretty awesome. And this movie does a good job showing how they work and how much work it was to make ‘em work. And what happens when they’re in a storm. Good times and bad. That’s cool.

And, yeah. Whaling is bad. We get that now. But, this was back then. They didn’t get it. Movie’s just trying to be true to history, y’know? With that, the whaling sections were alright, too. The effects made ‘em look like cartoons, but they were big and imposing and it was impressive. And when the white whale showed up and wrecked them and their boat, that was intense! Great stuff!

And then it just kinda got dull. There was a lot of cool stuff happening, but nothing really clicked after that. I saw some cool stuff, sure. But didn’t really get a payoff for all the time I spent. It’s a bit of a bummer. The movie’s cool, but didn’t really scratch the itch.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

For my part, I felt much more satisfied. This drama knows how to utilize tension, building up not just the whale, but also the interactions between Captain Pollard and First Mate Chase. Theirs is the true tale.

These two were forced into a terrible position. A first mate who was placed into command without consent or input from the captain is a terrible idea, and lead to many of the tragedies that befell this ship and her crew. And their relationship grew expertly over the course of the film.

Simultaneously, the interactions between Melville and the survivor, Nickerson, are some of the best moments in the film. With the two of them discussing their respective demons to the pledge of discretion at the end, the rapport these two built was a joy to watch. Expert acting, all around.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

I’ve seen it before where a Critical movie attempts to be more of a Spectacle, and it often doesn’t work. It nearly did here. The ending simply ruins the film for the purely Spectacle minded. Which is a shame, since there’s so much good to be found here.

Acting and direction both are fantastic, though the special effects are weak. But, this is a Critical movie, and as such it will keep you on the edge of your seat for the duration of the run time. If you’re a Critical movie-goer, you’re going to be very pleased with the result. If not, well. It’s still a fun ride. Just don’t expect it to blow your socks off.

What Is It?

A re-imagining of the classic Godzilla movie, it’s a disaster movie first and a monster movie second.

A political drama built around Japanese government and the state of modern Japan.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

So, I was expecting Godzilla to roll in and just wreck the town, right? I mean, the title on the movie is “A City Doomed”. But I think I aged visibly waiting for that to happen.

It was cool when it did, though. The special effects are just a little cheesy but they work pretty well. And Godzilla’s pretty scary looking in this one. Plus, they did all kinds of cool things with his radiation breath. That was a lot of fun.

But there is so much talking. It never ends. There’s like 40 characters, and most of them only get one or two lines. It’s just endless bureaucracy and it’s so boring. It’s a complete snooze-fest waiting for cool stuff to happen.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

For my part, I came away impressed with the presentation. The movie certainly drags, and because of what it is that cannot be helped. The pace is purposeful. We, the audience, are meant to see how slowly these agencies and committees are, and how ineffective they were in dealing with the crisis at hand.

At it’s core, this is not so much a monster movie, but a commentary on the nature of large government bodies. That, ultimately, they were ineffective at handling such a large scale disaster. It took a man forming a team and throwing away overly complicated formal structure in order to accomplish the goals presented to them. And more than that, it also extolls the virtues of sharing data and information. That through cooperation, the crisis was averted.

There are also numerous positive messages concerning political bodies in other countries. Of particular note is the United States. Seeing the film maker portray America in such a positive light truly shows their commitment to this message. And for this reason, I heartily endorse this film.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

This is a strange one. Using the concept of Godzilla to once again warn of the dangers we face in a modern era when audiences expect silly action and grand spectacle is risky. And for those looking for a good spectacle, there is going to be a huge amount of disappointment. While the movie has moments, it is not a spectacle movie.

But, for those of us willing to sit through the slow and overly political board meetings piled upon board meetings, there is a narrative here of undoing bureaucratic bloat, of cooperation with our neighbors, and of positive ideals bringing the world forward. If you’re looking for something to sink your mental teeth into, this might be the picture for you.

What Is It?

A movie adaptation of the Steven King young-adult adventure series of the same name. A boy has vivid dreams of a place he’s never seen and people he’s never met. After finding a portal to another world, he finds out his dreams were visions from another world.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This movie’s one heck of a trip!

The whole thing feels kinda dreamy. The world we see on the other side of the portal seems all normal but it’s really messed up. There’s demons, and monsters pretending to be humans, and this sorcerer guy that’s behind everything.

But it also has some awesome action sequences! Great gun play from Idris Elba blending practical and special effects. It’s a great mixture giving lots of stuff to see.

Plus, it’s nice and snappy. No slow moments in this flick. It’s straight and to the point and just lets the audience enjoy the ride. Sure, it’s a little dark in theme. But I’d say anyone looking for an action fix is gonna get something here.

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

I was fairly pleased with the effective, if not simple, story. Here we see another example of the boy who is normal and average being lifted to greatness not by deed but by Destiny and Prophecy. What sets him apart is his proactive approach to such. He doesn’t wait for things to happen to him, he takes charge and makes things happen. Often at great personal expense and danger.

It was also very satisfying to watch The Gunslinger grow as a character and become a surrogate father figure. Starting as unwilling, and slowly growing more fond as the movie progresses. It was done very naturally and was tremendously effective.

I must also applaud the actors, both young and old, for excellent performances. Things felt natural and flowed well.

The story is a bit simplistic and overdone, which is a valid concern with this title. It’s a dime a dozen story. The thing that sets this movie apart is the focus on Elba’s character partway through, allowing the focus to shift away from the Boy Wonder to more interesting things. Also, as I mentioned above, his proactive nature. It’s an enjoyable film with excellent messaging.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

It’s a simple story that has been told and retold over and over. This one mixes good action with effective and concise storytelling to make for an effective movie. The pacing is snappy, and at times can feel slightly rushed, but it’s done well for what the movie is. The film leaves you wanting more, but still feeling satisfied overall. Not a bad position to be in when there’s still a series of books to pull from after this story. Hopefully we can see more from Steven King and this series going forward.

What is it?

The movie adaptation of “The Coldest City” and directorial debut of David Leitch, who is primarily a stuntman with some acting under his belt. The story is set over Berlin, just before the fall of the wall, as spies and secret agents from a variety of backgrounds all search for and fight over a priceless list of names. The list would out every secret operative between several agencies.

“The Spectacular” Specs:

This one was weird. It was good, but it also kinda wasn’t. It went back and forth, y’know?

Like, when it’s all action, it’s great. There aren’t any shootouts, it’s all up close and personal! And yeah, Charlize Theron’s character is a lot smaller than the dudes she’s beating up, and the movie makes a pretty good point of that. She’s gotta surprise anyone she fights first. It’s kinda her whole thing. Surprise ‘em, then disarm ‘em, then she’s after ‘em! That’s pretty realistic, and it’s awesome! And every time she can’t do that, she gets her butt kicked. I liked the consistency there.

The car chases are really cool, too. They use this weird camera method that lets you see everything that’s going on while focusing on the actors. That worked pretty good, too! Since this is this guy’s first feature length movie, I’ve got a lot of hope for this guy!

But, then the movie slows down to have a bunch of people talk and it’s just so slow! I don’t really get what’s going on, and I don’t really care. I just wanna see spies do cool stuff. All the intrigue and double crossing doesn’t work here because it’s just not interesting! And, yeah. There’s way more of that than there is the really good stuff in the rest of the movie. Go for it if you don’t mind struggling through the slow bits, because the awesome bits are great!

Critic MacCritical Esq. III:

The fight choreography is indeed spectacular, but I must focus on the story elements for this film. It has the pacing of a deep thinking film after all.

Which pains me to say that the movie is more than a little pretentious.

With every character double crossing every other character as often as possible, it’s very difficult to tell who is on what side. Or even if there are sides. By the end I was no longer attempting to keep up with national affiliations and was instead focusing on Theron’s character and her immediate predicaments.

There is very little payoff for your patience as a critical movie goer. The tired plot has it’s usual twists and turns, and eventually manages to twist and turn itself into a spiraling descent into madness, with triple and even quadruple crosses. This film is an action film that tries desperately to be more thoughtful than itself, but rarely rises above it’s own backdrop of Berlin.

Do not be fooled by the pretty language used here or the setting.. This is not Critical film. This is an action film masquerading as something more.

The Reviewer’s Thoughts:

The real shame here is that this probably could have been a really great action movie. When there’s action, it’s great. It’s well shot to show everything, the fighting style is consistent and effective, and it’s got the right pacing to have been a great movie. But the action is more used as padding for the exceedingly dull talking scenes and non-sense plot. And then an ending that mostly comes out of nowhere and serves only to confuse.

This is a Spectacle movie, but not a very good one. If you’ve got a lot of patience, there are some amazing fight scenes. Otherwise, I’d recommend a skip on this one.