"No one wants to work anymore." Damn right brother. If I could sit in a beautiful field for 40 hours every week of my singular precious life I would
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@whatthespellisgoingon
"No one wants to work anymore." Damn right brother. If I could sit in a beautiful field for 40 hours every week of my singular precious life I would

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no see the thing is I think he has a point
the sun literally sets and casts a golden hue over everything every single day and we fucked it all up and invented paying rent
"what's your dream job??" Uhh to have 17 weird little hobbies that I don't have to be good at and hang out with friends. I get money via being the world's specialist little princess
BARBIE (2023) dir. Greta Gerwig

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dana scully character of all time. she's five foot two. her two day jobs are cutting up dead people and professional ghostbuster. she's got daddy issues. she owns a fluffy little dog. she's held multiple different government officials hostage multiple times. she kissed her boss on the mouth. she accuses said boss of trying to kill her like once a year with literally no foundation. she's catholic but her favorite movie is the exorcist. she shot her best friend. she was abducted by aliens and still refuses to believe in them. she dresses like an underpaid arts teacher. she met god in a parking garage. out of the two times the man she's been blisteringly in love with for years confessed his feelings to her, the first time she got so overwhelmed she started crying and the second time she thought he was high on painkillers. she can't park a car. she once had an existential crisis, got a tattoo, and slept with a serial killer. she wears socks on the beach. she might be immortal
One quiet day on the farm, the Little Red Hen found some wheat seeds and decided to make bread.
"Who will help me plant these seeds?" the Little Red Hen asked.
"I would." said the Horse "But I'm a workhorse, and I'm too busy moving carts around."
And so the Little Red Hen planted the seeds by herself. And they grew into bountiful golden crops.
"Who will help me harvest the wheat?" the Little Red Hen asked.
"I would." said the Dog "But I'm a guarddog, and I'm too busy keeping away burglars and predators."
And so the Little Red Hen harvested the wheat herself and made it into flour.
"Who will help me bake the flour?" the Little Red Hen asked.
"I would." said the Pig "But I'm a mother of 5 newborn piglets, and I'm too busy taking care of my young."
And so the Little Red Hen baked the bread herself into twenty beautiful loaves.
"Who will help me eat the bread?" the Little Red Hen asked.
"We would." said the Farm Animals. "But we're ashamed, for we didn't do anything to make the bread."
"Nonsense!" said the Little Red Hen. "You, Horse, helped move around the stones that built my oven. You, Dog, kept me safe while I worked. And you, Pig, are raising a new generation of Farm Animals, who will too contribute to our Farm one day. You've all helped me so much by simply being you."
"Besides," the Little Red Hen added. "I couldn't possibly eat all the loaves on my own, most of them would go to waste. Come, eat with me."
And so the Little Red Hen and the Farm Animals ate the bread together. And all saw their own, and each other's, worth.
I'll be telling this version to my child as he gets older.
Honestly the best and biggest compliment I've ever gotten on a piece of writing.
Thank you 🥲
Bird Count: 11
Type: Hen
Medium: Children's Story
Notes: Perfect story. It was an excellent choice to make the main character a bird. Solid writing all around.
I’ve read that Agatha said she loved being married to an archaeologist because the older she got, the more interesting he found her. And I think that is one of the best quotes about love that I have ever heard.
i need y'all to steal and repost my anti-lawn memes to as many pinterest boards and facebook pages as possible
Barbie (2023) ✦ Dir. Greta Gerwig

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Fleetwood Mac is the moon energy to ABBA’s sun energy.
Like the amount of sense that this makes and the depth of it are too powerful and cryptic. The fact that this wisdom can exist in such a stable form….it astounds me.
when people ask me what i want to do with my life i'm like. i wanna wear an ugly expensive coat to go grocery shopping at lidl... and uhh take a bath with someone who loves me... write a children's book that my lover illustrates.... be an extra in an a24 movie starring robert pattinson... be kissed on the eyelids.... blow on a spoonful of soup before eating it... own a pair of shiny patent leather loafers... thanks so much <3
birth is a curse and existence is a prison
and a long corridor leads only to the executioner’s block. But we are here. And you are here, reading this somewhere, in some place where you are.
I don’t want to define you by the hollow history of a manufactured reality. The soft geometry of you was not made by murder or the manicured nails of an inhuman bureaucracy. You were belched up, bright-eyed and blinking, into a universe that didn’t know you were coming and cannot comprehend why you are here – but you are. The only truth you have is that you are here.
Don’t you wish you’d give more space to the simple, howling thing at the core of you? The thing that makes you smile at strangers. The thing that makes you laugh at nothing, and be kind to others. The thing that looks at the lights and the stars and feels that yes, they are there for you.
I’m not telling you what to do.
I’m not even telling you what to think.
I’m telling you what you already know: You don’t have a choice.
You are a star who burns despite the vacuum in which you will one day die. You are a tidal wave who crashes, despite the unyielding ground against which you will soon obliterate yourself. You are a flower bending toward the light, even though the sun will soon engulf the earth in flame and the whole of civilization will be ash. You are a person standing next to another person.
Imagine it.
i’m so sorry for being a customer, i want to leave you alone but sometimes i have to buy things or eat. please understand i use self checkout whenever i can

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Instructions by Neil Gaiman
People who like rocks see cool rocks everywhere. People who like birds see interesting birds everywhere. The tree on your yard could be an exceptional specimen. The world around you could be amazing and magical, but you aren’t enough of a nerd to see it.
I gave my mum Alexandra Horowitz’s On Looking: Eleven Walks Through Expert Eyes for her birthday this year, it’s a book that revolves around this idea: the author invites 11 specialists in different things to walk around a boring city block with her one after the other so they can point out to her the things they see, that she doesn’t notice. There’s an expert in typography talking about what the variety of fonts on urban signs can tell you about the city’s history, an entomologist pointing out all the urban insects no one pays attention to, a geologist, a sound engineer…