yikes

support group for girls who are always knocking shit over

Worst thing ever in the whole world is when a thunderstorm is forecasted and then it doesn’t storm. literally so rude I was excited for this all day.

when people ask me for directions i’m sorry. i’m not that kind of girl

theyre inventing the opposite of ozempic that actually makes you happy. and theyre calling it yummy foods and treats

Having to clean the shower is so fucking annoying. It’s clean in there. That’s where I go to get clean. It’s clean dude trust me. Stop fucking growing bacteria and stuff man this is the clean locale. You’re embarrassing me in front of the sink

'you are not serious people' is a phrase that has done so much. thank you logan succession

the older i get the more i realize how unimportant it is to tell people my business

its harder being smug when you live your life as poorly as i do. but i manage

never doubt my ability to watch the same episode of something ten thousand times and remain just as interested and entertained every single time

if tumblr shuts down you can find me on tumblr. ill still be here. they cant make me leave

i love my boobs #myboobs